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Older Wife Interview help

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Filed: Other Country: Israel
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The I-130 has been approved, and the I-129F is in the envelope. I added all kinds of info regarding red flags, including the age difference, but I hear even with all that, it can be a big concern for the consulate. So, before I mail it, I'd like to make sure I haev done all I can do.

Frankly, it's me, the USC, who's doing all the work since up til now the paper work is at this end. Any suggestions as to how I can prep my husband, who seems rather oblivious as to why age would be a problem. Anyone with such a gap who has been thru this, do you have any good advice re prepping for his interview?

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Techinicaly you can not be denied because of the age difference. What the age difference does is raise suspicion that perhaps it is not a legitiamte relationship. Spend your engery getting evidence in place to show a strong and legitimate relationship exists. Be creative.

Being already married means you have a different burden of proof than we do filing for fiance visa. By that I mean husbands and wives often have more they know about each other than an engaged couple. Things like fiancial matters, family interactions etc.

Try not to worry so much about the age difference being a problem. Just focus on showing that you are a committed couple which I am sure you will have no problems showing! (F)


erfoud44.jpg

24 March 2009 I-751 received by USCIS

27 March 2009 Check Cashed

30 March 2009 NOA received

8 April 2009 Biometric notice arrived by mail

24 April 2009 Biometrics scheduled

26 April 2009 Touched

...once again waiting

1 September 2009 (just over 5 months) Approved and card production ordered.

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Morocco
Timeline

I agree with the above. Hopefully those who did a K-3 or CR1 can give you some advice. Just be ready to respond to any questions about your age difference.

I would say just have lots of evidence and go over some questions before the interview. you two will be fine. Good luck!!!

Sarah

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Filed: Timeline
The I-130 has been approved, and the I-129F is in the envelope. I added all kinds of info regarding red flags, including the age difference, but I hear even with all that, it can be a big concern for the consulate. So, before I mail it, I'd like to make sure I haev done all I can do.

Frankly, it's me, the USC, who's doing all the work since up til now the paper work is at this end. Any suggestions as to how I can prep my husband, who seems rather oblivious as to why age would be a problem. Anyone with such a gap who has been thru this, do you have any good advice re prepping for his interview?

We literally spent hours sitting and discussing our age difference in preparation. We looked at it from all angles and discussed our feelings and thoughts about it until he was so comfortable with the subject he had no trouble answering when asked about it. There was no "coaching" just letting him get in touch with his own opinions so that when he was drowning in his nerves he was able to give his opinion smoothly and with the confidence it deserved.

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Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Morocco
Timeline

The I-130 has been approved, and the I-129F is in the envelope. I added all kinds of info regarding red flags, including the age difference, but I hear even with all that, it can be a big concern for the consulate. So, before I mail it, I'd like to make sure I haev done all I can do.

Frankly, it's me, the USC, who's doing all the work since up til now the paper work is at this end. Any suggestions as to how I can prep my husband, who seems rather oblivious as to why age would be a problem. Anyone with such a gap who has been thru this, do you have any good advice re prepping for his interview?

We literally spent hours sitting and discussing our age difference in preparation. We looked at it from all angles and discussed our feelings and thoughts about it until he was so comfortable with the subject he had no trouble answering when asked about it. There was no "coaching" just letting him get in touch with his own opinions so that when he was drowning in his nerves he was able to give his opinion smoothly and with the confidence it deserved.

Great advise. The fact that he sees no problem with it will carry into his answers and so that is not an issue for you two. Thd CO didnt mention anything about it to my husband at his interview and I am 13 years older. Just load up on the evidence. They looked at everything with us.

Patti

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The I-130 has been approved, and the I-129F is in the envelope. I added all kinds of info regarding red flags, including the age difference, but I hear even with all that, it can be a big concern for the consulate. So, before I mail it, I'd like to make sure I haev done all I can do.

Frankly, it's me, the USC, who's doing all the work since up til now the paper work is at this end. Any suggestions as to how I can prep my husband, who seems rather oblivious as to why age would be a problem. Anyone with such a gap who has been thru this, do you have any good advice re prepping for his interview?

We literally spent hours sitting and discussing our age difference in preparation. We looked at it from all angles and discussed our feelings and thoughts about it until he was so comfortable with the subject he had no trouble answering when asked about it. There was no "coaching" just letting him get in touch with his own opinions so that when he was drowning in his nerves he was able to give his opinion smoothly and with the confidence it deserved.

I agree there should be no "coaching" -- just let him use his natural knowledge of you to show the vallidity of the relationship. There is nothing you can do to take the age difference "red flag" away - it will stand. However, because you are already married, as someone said, this will be less of an issue. Also, if I remember, you lived with him in Morocco already? If so, or if you have spent considerable time in the country this will help. Just let his natural knowledge of you and his real emotions guide him. If they sense he has been coached or is robotically listing off information, this will hurt you both.

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Morocco
Timeline
The I-130 has been approved, and the I-129F is in the envelope. I added all kinds of info regarding red flags, including the age difference, but I hear even with all that, it can be a big concern for the consulate. So, before I mail it, I'd like to make sure I haev done all I can do.

Frankly, it's me, the USC, who's doing all the work since up til now the paper work is at this end. Any suggestions as to how I can prep my husband, who seems rather oblivious as to why age would be a problem. Anyone with such a gap who has been thru this, do you have any good advice re prepping for his interview?

Let me make sure I understand this correctly. You already addressed all of your red flags with both the I-130 and the I-129F? I hope you did!

I have lots of advice, but it really will depend upon your answer to the above question.


'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

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Filed: Other Country: Israel
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Thanks to you all for your great advice. I feel better already!

Morocco4ever, I didn't adress the red flags in the I-130 because I didn't know to do that, but I have done so in the I-129F. Of course, they should already know about the age difference because our birthdays are now on file. Using the red flag issues list in Marc Ellis' article, and in the consular's handbook of rules (now removed from the internet), I've spent extra time addressing not only the age disparity, but family issues, employment issues, ethnic and religious issues, what we have in common, how we met, wedding (there was none)and honeymoon (we had one a year later) issues, why there is a time gap between the marriage and petition filing, why we married within two weeks after first meeting IRL, my previous marriage to an immigrant for whom I arranged AOS, along with some issues that were not relevent, but were noted. I've also included photos, receipts for hotels and travel, name changes, some tax info (we file jointly), and other stuff. The thing is about an inch deep.

I added all of that because I was afraid that, as has happened to some, the interviewer woildn't look at our evidence. Am I overdoing it?

Edited by szsz

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Filed: Other Country: Israel
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From what I've learned, alot of what goes on in the interview depends on who the interviewer is. But, one thing is for sure, they can delay or deny you based on finding out something troublesome during the interview that they didn't know before, so it's advised to cover your bases.

Edited by szsz

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Filed: Timeline

Absolutely. We did the same. Mohammed took additional "papers of proof" with him but they were rejected. The only paper object she would consider was a picture he took with him which she kept and placed in our file. The rest of the time she grilled him. I realize Egypt is an entirely different consulate and I agree on covering all bases, but it seems a constant that they almost always accept pictures.

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Morocco
Timeline
Thanks to you all for your great advice. I feel better already!

Morocco4ever, I didn't adress the red flags in the I-130 because I didn't know to do that, but I have done so in the I-129F. Of course, they should already know about the age difference because our birthdays are now on file. Using the red flag issues list in Marc Ellis' article, and in the consular's handbook of rules (now removed from the internet), I've spent extra time addressing not only the age disparity, but family issues, employment issues, ethnic and religious issues, what we have in common, how we met, wedding (there was none)and honeymoon (we had one a year later) issues, why there is a time gap between the marriage and petition filing, why we married within two weeks after first meeting IRL, my previous marriage to an immigrant for whom I arranged AOS, along with some issues that were not relevent, but were noted. I've also included photos, receipts for hotels and travel, name changes, some tax info (we file jointly), and other stuff. The thing is about an inch deep.

I added all of that because I was afraid that, as has happened to some, the interviewer woildn't look at our evidence. Am I overdoing it?

Are you overdoing it??? Thats a big giant NO!!!

So I am assuming that you have the approved I-129F, correct? If so, this is great! I think you have everything pretty much covered. I think it is a good idea to ask questions as if you are the consular officer in all possible questions, but the answers need to come from him. I am sure the age difference will come up, and it might be a good idea to first let him in his own words mention that the age difference means nothing to either of you, and keep his explanation as close to your letter with the I-12F as possible. But second I would address the fact that this information was already given to the USCIS when you submitted the approval. From what I have heard, and I don't know if this is true, but the consulate doesn't get anything from the approved petitions. If this is the case then they won't know it was already approved with knowledge of all of your red flags. Now if you mention that this info was included then I would hope it would deter them to find out the facts rather than send it back without thought like they have done to so many of us.

Two more things. Do you have letters of support from both yours and his? Extremely important! Have information included on this if the consulate feels the need to call them and verify anything. Lastly, you really should be there for the interview. They aren't going to let you into the consulate, but it shows a great amount of support on your part for the relationship. He will need to tell them that you are there, and take your passport in for proof.

Please tell me, when was your approval? I am wondering how close you are to an interview date. Ours just reached the NVC on Monday and I am waiting for them to forward it to the consulate now.

It is important to note that the consulate cannot send the petition back to the USCIS and request a revocation for a reason that was addressed in the initial petition, and was approved with that knowledge.


'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

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Filed: Other Country: Israel
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So I am assuming that you have the approved I-129F, correct? If so, this is great!

No, only the I-130 has been approved. The I-129F is sitting on my desk in front of me. I was afraid to send it without getting some input because it may be the last shot I get at forcing all this info on them before the interview.

Two more things. Do you have letters of support from both yours and his? Extremely important!

So far, I have only one from my side and none from his side. I didn't think they would carry as much weight as pictures would. Should they be signed or can they be emails stating that the following people can be contacted to support us? I'd like to get the I-129F out and snail mail will be a hinderance.

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Morocco
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So I am assuming that you have the approved I-129F, correct? If so, this is great!

No, only the I-130 has been approved. The I-129F is sitting on my desk in front of me. I was afraid to send it without getting some input because it may be the last shot I get at forcing all this info on them before the interview.

Two more things. Do you have letters of support from both yours and his? Extremely important!

So far, I have only one from my side and none from his side. I didn't think they would carry as much weight as pictures would. Should they be signed or can they be emails stating that the following people can be contacted to support us? I'd like to get the I-129F out and snail mail will be a hinderance.

Oh dear, so you haven't even sent in the I-129F? Well if that is the case there is no point now. Let me explain. If by chance they doubt the validity of your relationship and they send this back to the CIS then it won't make any difference if you get an approved I-129F with knowledge of everything. If you file it after they send the petition back, they will simply send it back too. (I am going off worse case scenario here).

You have a battle ahead of you. Now it is more important than ever that you have letters of support from all family members that will do it. Also from friends that know you as a couple. Your children, your parents, his parents, brothers, sisters, your friends his friends. I had about 9 letters total (3 of his sisters wrote theirs together and signed it). I had my family have theirs notorized, and he had his translated and stamped. One lady here didn't have it stamped, but included contact information. It worked for her, but I wasn't willing to take any chances that they would think it was us writing it.

It is also important you are there, no ifs ands or buts.

One more thing, write the consulate a letter explaining your love for him as well as how you know he loves you. Address in there all of your red flags, and make sure to have proof on paper for each fact you give them.

You know, now that I think about it, it might be a good idea to hire Marc Ellis now, before the interview. He will have the best way to deal with this I am sure.

Good luck!


'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

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