Hi all... starting my journey

[Neonred 3,446]

Oh man... there really is an aussiemen.com website...

Yup, I had to take a look too....Bet Caroline regrets opening her big mouth. That site gives a litttle too much insight into real Aussie men!

[homesick_american 1]

Is it true what they say? If you were about to respond with the "Yep, everything is bigger in..." I'll cut you off and let you know that I was going with the "Only steers and...." Anyway, just kidding. (I've got a few buddies from Texas, so I've heard all that stuff before... as I'm sure you have too!)

They talk about big things in Texas - but the fact is, Texas is so small that even if you cut Alaska in half, Texas would be only the third largest state. (;

Cheers!

AKDiver

If Manhattan had the same population density as Alaska, only 20 people would live there.

[slim 1,514]

I will be the first one to say that I do specifically look for Eastern European women, and AVOID American women.

I don't however, discriminate against any, I just prefer foreign women, specifically Eastern Europeans. (And more specifically, FAR EASTERN Europeans.)

It's amazing to me that (American) women don't think it's right when (American) men choose other women over them. If we were to flip the situation, and make a website with 48,000 rich, handsome, nice, caring, loving men, I'm betting women would be jumping at the chance to fly around the world (not to mention filing two K-1 visas!) to meet them.

[mrsushi66 0]

I will be the first one to say that I do specifically look for Eastern European women, and AVOID American women.

I don't however, discriminate against any, I just prefer foreign women, specifically Eastern Europeans. (And more specifically, FAR EASTERN Europeans.)

It's amazing to me that (American) women don't think it's right when (American) men choose other women over them. If we were to flip the situation, and make a website with 48,000 rich, handsome, nice, caring, loving men, I'm betting women would be jumping at the chance to fly around the world (not to mention filing two K-1 visas!) to meet them.

Funny, most of the women I have told have been very supportive of me. I think there are two factors that come into play here. First the women I have told know me. Second they were open minded. When I told them I started with I have fallen love with someone. When they hear me talk about Anna and what we have been through they are even more supportive.

I dont tell just any one, I only tell those people I consider friends and who know me and know that I do not make decisions on a whim. My guess that those people (notice I said people because I dont think it is just women who have a problem) who do have a problem are going to have the problem no matter how much you try and explain your situation. Have I told ex girlfriends and such, well no because my life is no longer their concern. I think in general if people sense the USC is truly in love with the fiance then they will not have a problem with the situation, I think it is when they hear things that make them think the USC are more interested in a maid, baby factory, sex toy, or whatever that gives them reason to question this type of arrangement.

Paul Misses Anna

[PurrSuede 0]

No but when people caution others ... when they are on their way to meet the girls waiting for them...that they can ONLY get 2 k1's...sounds fishy.

Keep in mind that now, thanks to something called IMBRA, there's a limitation on the number of K-1's you can file in a lifetime, and that limit is TWO or one within TWO years without a waiver of these requirements.

So if you K-1 with this woman, and it doesn't work out, you will either need to wait two years to try another K-1 (if you are using the K-1 as a "trial") or apply for a waiver.

The IMBRA waiver is a very new thing, so no one knows how many of these can be or will be granted. If you apply for the waiver on the basis of "my K-1 was a trial marriage, but we didn't work out so I sent her back home to Russia", I'd bet your waiver would be declined.

Think LONG and HARD before you K-1 someone just on the basis of a "trial before marriage". Another possibility if you don't want to go to Russia, is to meet her in a 3rd country that she can travel to on her Russian passport.

Just an idea you might want to look into. But the K-1 is really not a "try before you buy" kind of Visa, so keep that in mind as well.

This sounds like he is talking someone out of using a K1 as a dating mechanism...

sorry if i read it wrong

That's exactly what I was doing, informing the OP that the K-1 is NOT, nor should it ever be construed as a "dating mechanism" in any sense of the word.

-- Dan

[PurrSuede 0]

I will be the first one to say that I do specifically look for Eastern European women, and AVOID American women.

I don't however, discriminate against any, I just prefer foreign women, specifically Eastern Europeans. (And more specifically, FAR EASTERN Europeans.)

It's amazing to me that (American) women don't think it's right when (American) men choose other women over them. If we were to flip the situation, and make a website with 48,000 rich, handsome, nice, caring, loving men, I'm betting women would be jumping at the chance to fly around the world (not to mention filing two K-1 visas!) to meet them.

Funny, most of the women I have told have been very supportive of me. I think there are two factors that come into play here. First the women I have told know me. Second they were open minded. When I told them I started with I have fallen love with someone. When they hear me talk about Anna and what we have been through they are even more supportive.

I dont tell just any one, I only tell those people I consider friends and who know me and know that I do not make decisions on a whim. My guess that those people (notice I said people because I dont think it is just women who have a problem) who do have a problem are going to have the problem no matter how much you try and explain your situation. Have I told ex girlfriends and such, well no because my life is no longer their concern. I think in general if people sense the USC is truly in love with the fiance then they will not have a problem with the situation, I think it is when they hear things that make them think the USC are more interested in a maid, baby factory, sex toy, or whatever that gives them reason to question this type of arrangement.

Paul Misses Anna

I think both of these posts raise some interesting points.

For one, my ethnic heritage is partly Eastern European and my grandparents who did a lot of caring for me were immigrants from Eastern Europe, so in some ways there's a very "natural" feel for me when I go there, as it is in my heritage and bloodline and childhood.

For another, I often discuss with the AW who think it's just "sad" that we go searching for the Eastern European women, I often discuss with them the difference in demographics, and what they would do if the women outnumbered the men by a large proportion, I mean single, attractive, available women looking for husbands outnumbering the number of men.

As an example, I showed a friend of mine just ONE RW website. She was just astounded at the numbers and volume and all the pictures and profiles of the attractive women who were advertising themselves. When she picked her jaw back up off the floor, she said, god they make us American women look like DOGS. Her words, not mine.

I also showed her, I can put my profile up on say, Yahoo! or some other personals website and maybe, maybe in a few weeks I might get one or two or three responses. I can put my profile up on a RW website and within hours I can literally get swamped with replies. She couldn't believe the difference, and I even showed her my mailbox from a couple of sites.

Granted not every single one of these emails are something I would even want to pursue, but let's face it, if the women/men demographics were suddenly turned around in America, we'd be the candy in the candy store, instead of the other way around.

The other thing I explained to her. For example, I'm currently developing a relationship with someone new who's becoming very special to me. And I told her, we wrote letters back and forth, exchanged pictures for over six weeks, nearly TWO MONTHS, before we had a chance to talk on the phone together... and it will likely be several MORE months before we can even meet.

It's really quite quite different "dating" than waking up in the morning and wondering all about the person next to you.

My RW and I have talked about a variety of subjects, trying to understand and delve into each other's point of view and philosophy and thoughts and feelings ~before~ we ever can look into each other's eyes, before we can ever even hold hands, much less "wind up" in between the sheets together.

I asked this AW, since she's also out of a recently ended marriage, wouldn't you have liked to exchange emails and letters and phone calls with so-and-so (her ex-) for several months first before you wound up in bed with him?? Not that that is any iron-clad guarantee of a successful relationship, as I'll be the first to claim in that respect...

She thought for a minute and said .... 'wow, how romantic...'

things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmmm and sigh...

-- Dan

[mrsushi66 0]

There is an american site that does approach the whole dating thing by getting to know someone before you actually talk to them via phone or meet them in person.

I did that before I expanded my search, it is called Eharmony. I have to say every woman I met on there had and instant click with me or some aspect of who I am. One was a movie nut, one was a food fan, another was into photagraphy. In the end as the relationships progressed to a serious point they either didnt feel ready for a commitment or they just plain freeked. Of couse the majority of the women I was matched with were 10 years younger than me and I had set my age range from 25 to 37 when I was 38. I didnt match with one person my own age, dunno why.

Paul Misses Anna

[Fandango 1,439]

First off, welcome to the board Texas Proud.

Is it true what they say? If you were about to respond with the "Yep, everything is bigger in..." I'll cut you off and let you know that I was going with the "Only steers and...." Anyway, just kidding. (I've got a few buddies from Texas, so I've heard all that stuff before... as I'm sure you have too!)

Every since American men discovered that gorgeous women from Russia would like to talk to them, there's been the question, "Can she get a tourist visa? (So we don't HAVE to get married?)"

The tourist visa for a single Russian woman is like an urban legend. Folks have heard of it, but have never really seen one. Or, they knew a guy who knew this girl who had a friend that got one a long time ago. Something like that.

The only actual evidence that they exist is the fact that there are lots of denials out there, and if there are denials, surely there have to be some approvals somewhere too, right? You would think that, but once again, no one has actually seen one.

However, they do exist, and the only real proof that we have is that once upon a time, there was a VJer who met his fiancee while she was here on a TOURIST visa. Now, here come the strings attached.... she was here to visit her sister that was already married to an American guy.

So, if your perspective girl has a married sister (and I'm assuming not because she got denied already) then you're good to go. If not, a K-1 is the only option. If you head over to the K-1 board and start asking questions like "Do we really have to get married if she comes here on a K-1?" Or others like "Can we get a K-1, then she go home to finish work, school, dinner, whatever and then come back later?" You're going to get bombarded with nasty "THAT'S VISA FRAUD!!!! IT'S PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT MAKE THIS PROCESS HARD FOR EVERYONE!!! IF YOU REALLY LOVE EACH OTHER YOU'LL JUST GET MARRIED!!!!" Etc., etc., etc., from all of those people going through the long, tedious, visa process of getting their loved ones here from Canada. I know, I know, it's tuff, and it really sucks only being seperated by one border guard and 450 miles of open highway.... but you'll perservere! Stay strong!

OK, enough of that. Stick with us here on the Russia forum becuase plain and simple, Russia is different. The K-1 thread is actually VERY helpful when it comes to helping with papers, where to file, etc., but knows nothing at all about "special circumstances" when dealing with Russians, and for that, you'll need to get with the guys (and gals) on here.

To be 100% real, your only option if you want her to "visit" is to have her "visit" you for 3 months on the K-1, then if things don't look like they're going to work out, send her home, click on the next profile, then invite that one over for a 3 month "visit" too. However, you're going to have about 9 months to a year between "visitors" and that gets old.

My advice, take a little time, maybe even go "visit" her another time or two, then decide if you both want to get married. If so, go for the K-1, if not, click on the next profile.

(I'm going to get slaughtered for this post, but sorry everyone, that's how things work when dealing with Russian girls and Tourist/K-1 visas. THERE ARE NO OTHER OPTIONS!)

...and they say romance is dead

I once had a Russian girl tell me that when "Russian woman love man, she love all about man. Not him looks, not him money, not him house or car, not him city, not big or small, not old or young, not any one thing about man. Love only all man, and everythink about this man. Doesn't matter everythink else.... if she love only him."

(That was about six years ago, and recently, I had to fill out a K-1 for her!)

What a blessing for you that she won't be setting her hopes too high!

[Fandango 1,439]

I will be the first one to say that I do specifically look for Eastern European women, and AVOID American women.

I don't however, discriminate against any, I just prefer foreign women, specifically Eastern Europeans. (And more specifically, FAR EASTERN Europeans.)

It's amazing to me that (American) women don't think it's right when (American) men choose other women over them. If we were to flip the situation, and make a website with 48,000 rich, handsome, nice, caring, loving men, I'm betting women would be jumping at the chance to fly around the world (not to mention filing two K-1 visas!) to meet them.

Fwiw, I couldn't care less who you date/marry/choose. I think it's great that you have found a preference that is so accepting of you...as you have said in the quote I posted in the previous post. What I do have a problem with is really wrong generalizations. I don't feel it's necessary to put down an entire nation of women for you to justify your choice. Your justifications are inaccurate & hypocritical, amongst other things.

Be happy, get married, fall in love or not...whatever...But instead of bein all 'American women this, Russian women that' how about seeing your woman as an individual and not some homogenized churned out replica of every other woman in Russia?

[CarolineM 0]

I also showed her, I can put my profile up on say, Yahoo! or some other personals website and maybe, maybe in a few weeks I might get one or two or three responses. I can put my profile up on a RW website and within hours I can literally get swamped

Ummmm hello??? Do ya not GET THAT???

[mrsushi66 0]

I also showed her, I can put my profile up on say, Yahoo! or some other personals website and maybe, maybe in a few weeks I might get one or two or three responses. I can put my profile up on a RW website and within hours I can literally get swamped

Ummmm hello??? Do ya not GET THAT???

No CarolineM, please enlighten me was to why that is happening. I want to see just how much you truly understand why that is happening. So please give me your best and most intelegent analysis of why that is happening. You to LisaD I would love to hear your analysis of why this is happening.

[PurrSuede 0]

I also showed her, I can put my profile up on say, Yahoo! or some other personals website and maybe, maybe in a few weeks I might get one or two or three responses. I can put my profile up on a RW website and within hours I can literally get swamped

Ummmm hello??? Do ya not GET THAT???

Helllllo, do YOU not get it??

and the rest of my quote said:

Granted not every single one of these emails are something I would even want to pursue, but let's face it, if the women/men demographics were suddenly turned around in America, we'd be the candy in the candy store, instead of the other way around.

can you say "demographics"?? I knew ya could!

Oh yeah, I forgot, you're gonna denigrate all of them as only seeking a "visa" and "a better life".

I loved it when one woman told me... "oh obviously she's just seeking a 'better life'..."

And I was like... ummmmmmm just what woman ~isn't~???

LOL

-- Dan

[Fandango 1,439]

The only question I'd like to ask is to the OP. This thread is called 'starting my journey...my question is 'with whom?'

[travlnmannn 0]

I just got into this thread late. But I have to say that I truly believe that Russian women can be thought of some kind of commodity by American Men. Yes of course they look for a better life but like PurrSuede said "What woman isn't". I've had some good experiences with American woman and some bad. Although the one VERY GOOD experience I had after my divorce was with an AW that was originally from Romania. She is now a very good friend of mine. I just think the American Man has spoiled the AW. An AW is interested in what material things a man has to offer. A RW asks only what intellectualy stimulating characters do you have to offer. Of course this is only my opinion. And I dont mean this towards all AW. But I do believe that we as the American Men have put the AW in a position to want more than sometimes we can offer.

[CarolineM 0]