Im a skeptic, but a curious skeptic

[Allamericankiwi 14]

Im a skeptic....Im naturally suspicious. why do young beautiful women from 3rd world countries or communist countries or less adavantaged countries, go online looking for an american or british or australian or european partner....and the websites are full of these women/guys.

I think theyre looking for a way out of where they are, and will fall in "love" with anyone who meets their criteria..

So you have all these women/men online who are waiting around for a msg from an american or australian etc and then fall in "love" with their correspondent.....once they find out that theyre financially secure that is and can give them a better life of course....

Im seeing more and more wrinkled fat men around here where I live with nice looking asian type women, and I have to wonder about that....Im naturally suspicious...why are they with these guys....must be money or location or both......just what are these ladies in love with??

I have finally concluded that almost all overseas dating is a big con....non-western peoples wanting to go to western countries to escape their life and the dating site can do it.....

I know there are exceptions but they must be very few......

I hope I can be proven wrong but I dont think so...

[darkangel1215 4]

Im a skeptic....Im naturally suspicious. why do young beautiful women from 3rd world countries or communist countries or less adavantaged countries, go online looking for an american or british or australian or european partner....and the websites are full of these women/guys.

I think theyre looking for a way out of where they are, and will fall in "love" with anyone who meets their criteria..

So you have all these women/men online who are waiting around for a msg from an american or australian etc and then fall in "love" with their correspondent.....once they find out that theyre financially secure that is and can give them a better life of course....

Im seeing more and more wrinkled fat men around here where I live with nice looking asian type women, and I have to wonder about that....Im naturally suspicious...why are they with these guys....must be money or location or both......just what are these ladies in love with??

I have finally concluded that almost all overseas dating is a big con....non-western peoples wanting to go to western countries to escape their life and the dating site can do it.....

I know there are exceptions but they must be very few......

I hope I can be proven wrong but I dont think so...

You know It hurts everytime people thinking like that. Especially people from ASIA!? you know i am Filipina, I live in 3rd world country and I met my husband through online. I married him because I LOVE HIM more than anything else in this world. He meets the criteria that I want in a GUY!!..He is a kindhearted person, loyal, nice and hardworking and especially he is YOUNG and have a nice body.. Since we started our relationship he told me that he is not rich, I said so what? money cant buy happiness,true love and respect! I can say SOME people marrying some foreigners so they cant get out of their country and live like a Queen. But just think. are they happy? are they going to bring those money when they die???

You dont know why people do that and do this! everything have a reason. Like you! why are you thinking that people from 3rd world country is looking foreigner online?? maybe you had an experience like that before. Dont point that people from 3rd world are so BAD!!

Im hurt when I read this. I know to myself that i married my husband because of my LOVE to him..

Do you find your True LOVE?

[thongd4me 69]

Im a skeptic....Im naturally suspicious. why do young beautiful women from 3rd world countries or communist countries or less adavantaged countries, go online looking for an american or british or australian or european partner....and the websites are full of these women/guys.

I think theyre looking for a way out of where they are, and will fall in "love" with anyone who meets their criteria..

So you have all these women/men online who are waiting around for a msg from an american or australian etc and then fall in "love" with their correspondent.....once they find out that theyre financially secure that is and can give them a better life of course....

Im seeing more and more wrinkled fat men around here where I live with nice looking asian type women, and I have to wonder about that....Im naturally suspicious...why are they with these guys....must be money or location or both......just what are these ladies in love with??

I have finally concluded that almost all overseas dating is a big con....non-western peoples wanting to go to western countries to escape their life and the dating site can do it.....

I know there are exceptions but they must be very few......

I hope I can be proven wrong but I dont think so...

How could anyone be in love with a Kiwi? Probably some Kiwi pheromone, possibly treatable.

[tallcoolone 102]

I can only speak for Philippines. Americans whom are tall with long noses and white skin are considered by the culture to be "Beautiful". Many girls bleach their skin in order to have white skin, and most girls from Philippines avoid the sun like the plague.

I am treated like a King or a rock star when I walk the streets in Philippines, not only by the woman but by the men and children also. I was actually on vacation in Philippines when I met my wife, I had little knowledge of the country or the culture.

It is stated that Philippines has some of the most beautiful woman in the world and they also have a reputation for making wonderful wives, which I will concur after being with my wife for 3 years now.

Different Culture form America, it is common to find girls that are still virgin late in their 20's, Getting married and not being pure would be a disgrace to the girl and her family.

I am more than twice the age of my wife, I met her when she was 19 and I was 42.

Edited May 4, 2010 by tallcoolone

[darkangel1215 4]

I can only speak for Philippines. Americans whom are tall with long noses and white skin are considered by the culture to be "Beautiful". Many girls bleach their skin in order to have white skin, and most girls from Philippines avoid the sun like the plague.

I am treated like a King or a rock star when I walk the streets in Philippines, not only by the woman but by the men and children also. I was actually on vacation in Philippines when I met my wife, I had little knowledge of the country or the culture.

It is stated that Philippines has some of the most beautiful woman in the world and they also have a reputation for making wonderful wives, which I will concur after being with my wife for 3 years now.

I am more than twice the age of my wife, I met her when she was 19 and I was 42.

I agree with you! My husband is 33 and im 23.

I can only speak for Philippines. Americans whom are tall with long noses and white skin are considered by the culture to be "Beautiful". Many girls bleach their skin in order to have white skin, and most girls from Philippines avoid the sun like the plague.

I am treated like a King or a rock star when I walk the streets in Philippines, not only by the woman but by the men and children also. I was actually on vacation in Philippines when I met my wife, I had little knowledge of the country or the culture.

It is stated that Philippines has some of the most beautiful woman in the world and they also have a reputation for making wonderful wives, which I will concur after being with my wife for 3 years now.

I am more than twice the age of my wife, I met her when she was 19 and I was 42.

I agree with you! My husband is 33 and im 23.

[Allamericankiwi 14]

"You know It hurts everytime people thinking like that. Especially people from ASIA!? you know i am Filipina, I live in 3rd world country and I met my husband through online. I married him because I LOVE HIM more than anything else in this world. He meets the criteria that I want in a GUY!!..He is a kindhearted person, loyal, nice and hardworking and especially he is YOUNG and have a nice body....."

Im trying to understand why young overseas attractive women marry much older out of shape overseas men from rich western countries. Why dont they marry young good looking guys from their own country......is there no-one nearby who "meets their criteria......why go online looking overseas in the first place. Forgive my skepticism but alot of people from my culture will be suspicious....and when you say especially he is young and have a nice body...sounds like thats the most important thing....but maybe its just the way youre saying it.....

Love is an evolving thing....it can grow or go.......I think the larger the age difference the risk of it going increases....of course each person is different. Some ladies/men are so loyal to the end......bless them...

[thongd4me 69]

I can only speak for Philippines. Americans whom are tall with long noses and white skin are considered by the culture to be "Beautiful". Many girls bleach their skin in order to have white skin, and most girls from Philippines avoid the sun like the plague.

I am treated like a King or a rock star when I walk the streets in Philippines, not only by the woman but by the men and children also. I was actually on vacation in Philippines when I met my wife, I had little knowledge of the country or the culture.

It is stated that Philippines has some of the most beautiful woman in the world and they also have a reputation for making wonderful wives, which I will concur after being with my wife for 3 years now.

Different Culture form America, it is common to find girls that are still virgin late in their 20's, Getting married and not being pure would be a disgrace to the girl and her family.

I am more than twice the age of my wife, I met her when she was 19 and I was 42.

There are similar parallels to this in Thailand, but that being said, I think the OP is somewhat confused by the attraction issue.

He didn't choose an Asian, but that's well & good, to each his own.

The reasons why Filipinas & Thai women make good wives are not all about their looks.

They have different religious roots but they both know what it means to put family first.

I once dated a drop-dead gorgeous Chinese-born American woman (for a very very short time)

who turned out to have a nightmarish personality. I don't call it American or Asian, I just called it bad.

My first wife was Japanese and the reason we split had ZERO to do with cross-cultural issues.

We learn from our mistakes and move on and hopefully find out what is important in life.

Peace

[Allamericankiwi 14]

How could anyone be in love with a Kiwi? Probably some Kiwi pheromone, possibly treatable.

LOL ....yes kiwis are a strange lot....thats why I left NZ....they were too strange for me.....:-)

[Allamericankiwi 14]

There are similar parallels to this in Thailand, but that being said, I think the OP is somewhat confused by the attraction issue.

[Fandango 1,439]

I think this topic is way too controversial for this particular website because it hits a little too close to home. People in love cannot be objective, and this thread is gonna turn into a huge flame war, heh.

Oh, just for the record, I think the OP was talking about the initial motivation to join an int'l dating site in the first place...not the actual marriage. *shrug*

Edited May 4, 2010 by Happy Bunny

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Going somewhat but I think that applies to discussions relating to illegal immigration too. People on this board lose all sense of perspective when that comes up and go off on mad rants, describing human beings as "filth" and suggesting that they be strung up from a tree or put up against a wall.

Edited May 4, 2010 by Its a MADHOUSE

[Fandango 1,439]

Going somewhat but I think that applies to discussions relating to illegal immigration too. People on this board lose all sense of perspective when that comes up and go off on mad rants, describing human beings as "filth" and suggesting that they be strung up from a tree or put up against a wall.

Wow I have missed a lot, who said that and where?

Speaking as objectively as I can, I THINK the OP is differentiating between those who met in person/online randomly from those who met on sites for int'l dating. Let's face it, dating while each is in his/her own country isn't the easiest thing in the world, that's for damn sure....why anyone would CHOOSE to do it intentionally is quite baffling, heh.

[thongd4me 69]

LOL ....yes kiwis are a strange lot....thats why I left NZ....they were too strange for me.....:-)

Whatever works mate

[GabiandVi 34]

First, so no one thinks I'm being defensive I should say that I did not meet my husband online. We met in a third country where we dated and lived "together" before we married, and until our child was born, we never thought we were going to live in the US. And my husband still complains that we ever left that country.

But I believe love is a choice. I believe you are probably right that a lot of women/men wait on dating sites until they find someone who meets their criteria, but how is that so much different from the way that we date off line?

I think of it as sort like arranged marriages, which seem to be more successful statistically than marriages based on "falling in love." Like I've said, I believe love is a choice, and if you don't understand that even in a marriage where you "fell in love," when things get tough, which they inevitably do, and when someone at work or elsewhere is sympathetic about your marriage troubles and otherwise very attentive, I'm sure their grass (no pun intended) is going to look much greener, and you may just decide to start mowing their lawn and leaving yours to the gardener. (Okay, now I'm getting out of hand. Sorry.) You have to make the choice to love your partner every day, so it's not a bad idea to make sure they meet your criteria.

Are some women/men using their USC/Australian/Kiwi/Etc. spouses to get out of their countries? Probably so. Or definitely so according to some of the posts in some of the forums here. But are some USC/Australian/Kiwi/Etc. spouses using their foreign spouses as trophy wives, etc.? Probably so.

If the marriage works, it doesn't really matter how it started, nor how unlikely the couple seems (i.e. old, fat, white man and beautiful, young Asian woman, etc.) If it doesn't work, that is unfortunate.

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Wow I have missed a lot, who said that and where?

It was in a thread the other day - Paul and Vanessa suggested (actually he stated) that he supports "degrees of genocide" and believes that the penalty for crossing the border illegally should be summary execution.

Speaking as objectively as I can, I THINK the OP is differentiating between those who met in person/online randomly from those who met on sites for int'l dating. Let's face it, dating while each is in his/her own country isn't the easiest thing in the world, that's for damn sure....why anyone would CHOOSE to do it intentionally is quite baffling, heh.

While it obviously isn't right to comment on the legitimacy or lack thereof of individual's relationships, generally speaking, I do think that large age gaps between couples where young women are being brought in from another country by older American men are a bit suspicious (on the surface at any rate). I would imagine that it's part of the reason why the USCIS conducts extra checks in certain countries because of high rates of visa fraud.