Baby Corner

[chnst 6]

Nikita: ahh the same old story. I think I spend most of my time at work with overtired and insecure mom's on that exact topic. I don't know who puts that false impression in a mother's head that if she feeds her kid a bottle of formula at night she'll get a break? She'll just get more insecure about her ability to breastfeed and end up supplementing more often than not, then beating herself up even more for being a failure at breastfeeding again.

Babies don't sleep better or longer if you stuff them with formula at night. The first day they're born, they act sleepy because its a tough job to be born and transition to life outside mom's belly. It's hard work for them to eat, breathe and poop, hence they sleep most of the time. Around day 2 or 3 they wake up and realize they're starving and they miss the warm and safe environment they have experienced the past 9 months. So they are more fussy, they want to be held and cluster feed. Feeding them a bottle may seem like mom will get an hour of sanity but in the big picture it screws up the whole breastfeeding. Plus, getting a bottle ready and feeding and burping take about as long as just getting comfy and throwing a ####### at the kid while you can relax and get some cuddle time too.

If I can give you one piece of advice- make up your mind about how you want to feed your baby from the first day he/she is born and commit. Either way. You'll save yourself from second guessing your decision all the time or giving bf a half attempt, before you switch to bottles and then say "see I knew I couldn't do it". IMO Formula feeding may seem like an easier way in the beginning but in the long term it's not. Breastfeeding can be very hard and straining in the beginning but it will pay off so much in the long term . It's hard work and a learning process, but your baby will be healthier and it's benefcial for your own health.

[tnh9479 1]

I have to disagree about your baby being healthier if you breastfeed. Is it more natural or organic? Yes. But, I know I couldn't breastfeed (my milk NEVER came in -- never got engorged at ALL). So, we had to formula feed. My sister chose to because she had so many issues. We have kids who are growing and thriving. Heck my nieces are soooo smart too (there goes that IQ idea too). I really hate sweeping generalizations. Wouldn't it be better to say breastfeeding at first can be hard, if all goes right? Just give it your best try and do not cave in easily to formula feeding as it will make it harder.

[Eveline 9]

I love your post Chnst...I have to disagree on the 'healthy' part too though...my kids were both exclusively breastfed, both for 12months and longer and - at least Allie - is sick all the time...you know our struggles with ear infections and bronchial issues so I really don't believe in that anymore. Other than that I'm all about breastfeeding and everything that comes with it

[chnst 6]

It has been proven that breastfed babies are less obese, have significantly less allergies and get sick less often due to the prolongued immunity from mom. Yes there are exceptions like Evi's kids. Or mine. Ben is almost 3 and still having trouble pooping.

Of course if you choose to raise your baby on formula that doesn't mean they're not going to thrive! Or not going to be smart. And yes there are mom's who don't have enough milk after weeks of trying.

Just saying, in my experience the mothers who are going into this with a sense of inconfidence are more likely to set themselves up for failure. I think 99% of the mommies who request a bottle during the first few days at the hospital are going to stop breastfeeding as soon as they get home and run into a problem there.

I think with all that formula marketing etc mom's believe that as soon as the baby is born he needs a good feed. ASAP. which is wrong. Newborns can actually handle just the few drops that mom provides for a few days.

Babies are wired to sleep, eat, poop and cuddle and mom's are wired to change diapers, rock and feed. Formula companies are very smart rich people who know that and like to encourage an insecure mom to give baby a bottle, because after all he "could be hungry" and you have an instant measurable success if baby takes an ounce vs not knowing if baby is getting enough from the breast.

Evi: sorry you're still having so much problems with Allie! I hope she'll outgrow it soon! Ben is doing a lot better with his bronchial issues, he didn't need his neb since last spring, so I'm hoping he is going to do better this year and eventually outgrow this.

moms: any ideas how to wean a toddler from his pacifier? Ben is doing ok during the days without it, but I have no clue how to get him to stop using it at night without major drama. He goes to sleep in his carseat without it, if we tell him sorry we didn't bring the "bookah" but whenever we tried it at home around bedtime, he won.

[tnh9479 1]

I find do many exceptions to the healthier part in my every day experiences. I had friends who exclusively breast fed the first year and their kids were back and forth to the peds all the time for this or that. I really think it all comes down to genetics. My husband, in his 30's and eating American food, is still a size 30 waist. We both are over 5'8" tall. It is no surprise our two are tall and relatively thin. My DH and I both were rarely sick as kids. So are our two. Allergies are sooooooo prevalent in my family (my sister, myself and all my dad's family had horrible incidences of it and all were breastfed). So...it was not a huge surprise to find one of our kids has allergies. What do I think is a problem? The prevalence of all these additives in all processed or semi-processed food. As a society we used to eat so much less prepared food a generation ago. Now this stuff is laden with salt, fat, wheat, soy, corn syrup, etc. It is no wonder why we are widening as a society. To blame that solely on formula feeding is naive at best. Do I trust all studies? As a person with a science degree who teaches science classes, you got to look at who is doing them and who is funding them. Just look at all the drama around the vaccines and autism study.

[Anna C. 4]

Well the studies done on breastfeeding are valid, it's just that any study is considered statistically significant if the margin of error is 5% or less. So results only apply to 95% or more percent of the population and some of us just might know those small groups when it doesn't apply. Also science isn't super exclusive, there is always the exception... Overall the results just show that breastfed children do better compared to their bottlefed peers. That takes all people into account, not looking at individual genetics. My nephew is sick a lot and still breastfeeds at 2.5 years, yet I think it has to do a lot with my sister giving him antibiotics right away for every ailment before trying the alternative route, she's super quick at medicating. I could have given Jona antibiotics if I wanted to but chose not to when he was sick (which is rarely) as his fevers always subsided within hours, my sister would rush her son right away to urgent care and get an rx... Overuse of meds definitely weaken your immune system... And then some kids are just unlucky. This sister as a kid got ear infections a lot due to polyps and just tends to catch colds, while my other sister and I were rarely ever sick. My husband and his siblings are rarely sick too, so we have good genetics here for our kids, but that's no guarantee either. Anyways, I think it is indisputable that breastmilk is far superior to formula, but it is not the end of the world to use formula, it's just the third choice for infant nutrition (breastmilk, donated breastmilk, then formula is the order of choices - if I had too little milk or no milk I would look into donated breastmilk from a breastmilk bank, at least to partially use breastmilk and formula). And my sisters and I were bottlefed, and yes we turned out fine, but maybe my sister would have been less sick, maybe I would have grown faster (was a tiny tiny tiny kid), maybe it wouldn't have made a visible difference. There are just no guarantees for anything!

@ Marm: yeah don't beat yourself up... What's done is done and I doubt that the 4D u/s harmed your baby. I chose very little u/s this time around for several reasons, but mostly cause it hurts me so much (they always push so hard down on my abdomen) and I only wanted one for the anatomy scan and ended up with two as I measured really small at the end. Oh well.

[chnst 6]

I don't think you can blame just what baby eats on all the childhood diseases, I'm guessing there are a lot of environmental factors playing into it. And all the overprocessing of food and new chemicals and stuff our food is treated with. Even breastmilk isn't safe from that ####### if mom consumes it.

I'm not sure if I could use someone elses breastmilk from a milk bank if I couldn't breastfeed, if I don't know the person.

[Jenn! 918]

Exceptions do not disprove statistical generalizations. There are "healthy" formula-fed babies. There are "unhealthy" breastfed babies. No one has ever tried to say that ALL breastfed babies are healthier than ALL formula fed babies.

[Anna C. 4]

@ Steffi: The breastmilk bank screens milk just like blood donations are screened, for all diseases, the donors can't be on meds and so on... So I don't mind it at all... They use it in the hospital right next to the birthing center in Denver in their NICU III for preemies whose moms cannot breastfeed and have seen better success rates (part of the education at the birthing center required us to sign preadmission papers to the hospital in case of a transfer and the hospital person came over and talked about what they have there).

As for pacis, I have no advice on how to do it, but one advice on how not to do it. My parents didn't get rid of my paci til I was a little over 3 years old and since they didn't know how to do it, they took me to the dentist and have the dentist tell me that he will take away all the pacis now since they are bad for teeth. Needless to say, I didn't like dentists very much... Not a great way to start your lifelong relationship with dentists!!!! I know my FIL said that he poked holes into the pacis of his kids and then the suction won't work so they gave up on it...

[Eveline 9]

@Steffi: You could have BEn 'give' the pacis to the new baby and get him a big boy toy instead or something. We took the paci away from Adam when he was just over two years old. First day was awful, especially at night but after that it was better. I did have one with me on our way back from Germany to the US (we were visiting Oma and Opa back then) just in case he freaked out about something but he never needed it.

Allie however is my thumb sucker and I have started to tell her that big girls don't suck their thumb and I have even put on nailpolish on her thumbs and told her that now she can't suck them no more. She gets it when she's awake but as soon as she's sleeping it's just a reflex and those thumbs go in her mouth.

She's hilarious though..I'm watching her right now trying to put a diaper on her little chair LOL

[chnst 6]

ahh hubby had the same idea about having him give the pacis to the baby, but he is so smart, he knows where to buy them, and I am worried that he will resent his little brother for taking them away. We told him the baby squirrels need it during the day and he was ok with giving it up during the day but now he hates squirrels! LOL

I will try the holes! The paci he is using is so annoying! It makes that sucking sound, and I can't stand it!!! Ben couldn't sleep at all last night so he ended up in our bed and then I couldn't sleep because I had to listen to that awful sucking noise! Worse than the little kid on the Simpsons!! I'm so worried that once we take it away his sleeping problems will start all over because its his only way of comforting himself it seems, and that doesn't even help all the time.

Hehe Ben likes to put diapers on his "friends" the monkey and the buffalo and then lecture them about how they are big boys and they need to start using the potty soon! haha I hope he'll remember this to tell his therapist in 20 years...

[Fandango 1,439]

Marm, don't feel too badly - I think it's human nature to want to 'take a peek'. We had a 4D one (dunno why the diff) and it was awesome to even just see the outline of the part of the face that we saw. He was either holding his hand in front of his face, or flipping us off with his middle finger resting on his nose. I still look at that pic and lol

___________

I just wanna have a quick moan about people who think that SAHPs are 'not contributing' to the household. *shakes fist* That is all.

___________

eta: Nick cut his first tooth the other day. He's a drooling machine lately too. Poor thing was in so much pain - I'm glad it's done. Only a few more to go, lol.

He won't take a paci, and he sucks his thumb quite oddly. He'll stick it in his mouth, then it goes to the side of his cheek, where he actually tugs on it. So he's not sucking at all, kinda just pulling his mouth open at the side. It's cute, I should take a pic.

Edited February 14, 2011 by Lisa C

[chri'stina 190]

Breastfeeding can be a hot topic!

It's really hard, in my opinion, when you had problems and were not able to b-feed exclusively. I know for me, I don't even like talking about it to some fellow mothers who had a very easy time with it. Easy not in the sense of feeling so happy and energetic, but with their baby actually latching on and getting enough milk. I felt very weird having to get a bottle out for formula around people who were breastfeeding still. No one actually acted mean towards me but knowing how passionate they were about it, and knowing that's how I had planned to be but it didn't happen, made me feel very weird around them. Kavi is hardly ever sick and the first year of his life I don't know if he even got sick. I do believe that breast milk is best. I don't know what I would have done back in the day when there wasn't formula, or when there weren't safe c-sections for that matter! It's just that the view I have now about it compared to what I thought before I had the baby are different and I am apprehensive in discussing this with most mothers I know unless I am very close friends with them.

Edited February 14, 2011 by chri'stina

[Fandango 1,439]

Oh, one more thing - Nick's also starting regular food! The hubby and I wanted a more natural approach to baby food, and his parents are of the same notion. So much so, that they used to prepare their own dog food. Anyhoo, MIL sent us a Beaba baby food maker. it seems like it is going to be an invaluable addition to my kitchen - being able to make Nick fresh food that I can control, and it's going to wind up being way cheaper than $.70 a jar.

Will let you all know how it goes!

[Eveline 9]

Lisa, way to go. I made babyfood for both kids, moreso for Adam than for Allie. I pureed and mashed like crazy and stocked up the freezer. I liked to add pureed barley to most of the stuff to get Adam's digestive system going. Also I happily mixed fruits and veggies, like green beans and applesauce...you could only taste the applesauce and Adam just munched down everything. With Allie I didn't bother to make as much. She was on regular tablefood way earlier, mainly because it was easier but also because she's a little hardheaded and would not eat the 'special food' so there for a while I made a bunch of sweet potato fries every week to give to the kids.

Acutally...I think I should make some sweet potato fries again...I haven't had those in a while and they are so good.

Have you checked out www.wholesomebabyfood.com? Very interesting and lots of information.