cold feet-- is it over?

[karenista 1]

after spending a week with my fiance in england (and he took me to spain for my birthday), he waited until the day i got home and then ended the relationship on skype, saying it was too much for him to move to the US and get married. he had an engagement ring to give me while i was there but he changed his mind and kept it. he didn't say a word about his fears while i was there or give me a chance to try to help the situation. and now its over and we haven't talked since. has this happened to anyone else on here? i fear that it really is over, with the distance i don't think we are going to be able to get things back on track.

[Stephen + Elisha 92]

Sorry to hear about this, hope it all works out...

not K-1 process or procedure related, relationship status-oriented... moving to K-1 Progress Reports

[karenista 1]

i should also add for background that we have been together for 8 months and seen each other six times for a week or more in both or our homes and elsewhere. we submitted our i-129f in september.

[VetsWife328 7]

Yes it happened to us too.Now we are married......

We needed two Visa's to finally get it right.

I had second thoughts,he had second thoughts so we didnt use the first Visa.Everything seemed to go wrong.We had a horrible horrible summer and fall,then in December of 2008 I went to the US on a Visa Waiver and we realized that our love for each other was/is stronger than the fear .And we re submitted the papers to the Consulate.I went back to Germany only for the second Interview and left 2 days after getting the new Visa.

There IS hope.

If your Fiance truly loves you he will realize that he can not be without you and that ties to his Home Country in the end dont matter.

Good Luck to you.

Nat

[Y's_habibitk 2]

Yes it happened to us too.Now we are married......

We needed two Visa's to finally get it right.

I had second thoughts,he had second thoughts so we didnt use the first Visa.Everything seemed to go wrong.We had a horrible horrible summer and fall,then in December of 2008 I went to the US on a Visa Waiver and we realized that our love for each other was/is stronger than the fear .And we re submitted the papers to the Consulate.I went back to Germany only for the second Interview and left 2 days after getting the new Visa.

There IS hope.

If your Fiance truly loves you he will realize that he can not be without you and that ties to his Home Country in the end dont matter.

Good Luck to you.

Nat

Thats a story of true love

To the OP, I think getting freaked the hell out when everything starts to come to fruition is not abonormal.

I hope thats the case and he just needs some time to figure out that a new life/change is all worth it to be with you.

If he doesnt, Im truly sorry for your pain and heartache, but its better to find out now before you got married.

[LukeLyn 0]

after spending a week with my fiance in england (and he took me to spain for my birthday), he waited until the day i got home and then ended the relationship on skype, saying it was too much for him to move to the US and get married. he had an engagement ring to give me while i was there but he changed his mind and kept it. he didn't say a word about his fears while i was there or give me a chance to try to help the situation. and now its over and we haven't talked since. has this happened to anyone else on here? i fear that it really is over, with the distance i don't think we are going to be able to get things back on track.

Have you two talked about your moving there, instead? If there is true love there, it shouldn't matter where you live (at least not in my view)--though there are many factors to consider, I'm sure. If there is love there, he may want to talk later, but if he is silent he may have made up his mind without the open communication with you. This was a big decision for him to make alone...you may want to consider this heavily. I'm sorry this happened. You deserve the best relationship that will come in your future!

God bless and keep you!

[karenista 1]

thank you for the responses. i think that what has happened is that he convinced himself that if he really loved me, he wouldn't have any doubts. he then spent the past week with me looking for confirmation of his doubts, so of course he found them. i don't think i stood a chance. in my mind of course we both have some doubts as we should but i thought our love was strong enough to take the chance. but if that is really how he feels, i don't think there is anything i can do about this.