Modern Love

[Fandango 1,440]

I dunno, I get the whole tongue in cheek thing, but I think an article comparing her husband to an animal is rude. I'm not downing you for posting it, Eliz, I'm just sayin that I think she comes off as a.....*EVERYBODY NOW*.....

CONDESCENDING COW! hahahah

Big whoop, he throws chit on the floor, to say chit like 'make him more perfect' or 'so I can love him more' is a bit chit. Yes, they've been together longer than me and D...not hugely so, but at the same time, I wouldn't look to compare him to training a fcuking animal. D and I have lived together for years and did have to learn to cohabitate in a manner that worked for the both of us, but it was a joint thing, not 'I'm going to train him my way'

If D wrote an article like this, I'd be pissed off. Jmo tho, and everyone has his or her own opinion and that's fine too.

but she's a cow

with bad teeth!!!

that's right!!! let's not forget the jacked up teeth....

[almaty 19]

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

[Fandango 1,440]

I didn't take it that way at all, man being an animal and stuff like that. It is all about COMMUNICATION.

That is why I loved it so much. It took the writer to get out of her logic and look at her relationship and communication with her husband from a different perspective. We all learn in different ways and weird things happen to me to finally get the "light bulb" turned on in my head. This was one of those obscure reads that did it. I have realized my nagging and my attitude which is triggered by the way my fiance does things. And if it takes a story about a sea lion, a turtle, a plant to help me, BRING IT ON!!!

What I got is not that she was communicating...I took it that she was training him. Two different things. Yes a couple can tweak themselves for each other...like D hates when I squish the toothpaste tube wherever I want...so now I try to do it from the bottom...or get mentadent in the container, lol. But it's only after we communicated with each other that we change certain behaviors....this woman essentially put a mackeral in the air and yelled 'here boy! good boy!'

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

cmon then, out with it!!!

[almaty 19]

I didn't take it that way at all, man being an animal and stuff like that. It is all about COMMUNICATION.

That is why I loved it so much. It took the writer to get out of her logic and look at her relationship and communication with her husband from a different perspective. We all learn in different ways and weird things happen to me to finally get the "light bulb" turned on in my head. This was one of those obscure reads that did it. I have realized my nagging and my attitude which is triggered by the way my fiance does things. And if it takes a story about a sea lion, a turtle, a plant to help me, BRING IT ON!!!

What I got is not that she was communicating...I took it that she was training him. Two different things. Yes a couple can tweak themselves for each other...like D hates when I squish the toothpaste tube wherever I want...so now I try to do it from the bottom...or get mentadent in the container, lol. But it's only after we communicated with each other that we change certain behaviors....this woman essentially put a mackeral in the air and yelled 'here boy! good boy!'

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

cmon then, out with it!!!

a.a... very nice..i think the ladies will enjoy this tale more than the men

[Fandango 1,440]

I didn't take it that way at all, man being an animal and stuff like that. It is all about COMMUNICATION.

That is why I loved it so much. It took the writer to get out of her logic and look at her relationship and communication with her husband from a different perspective. We all learn in different ways and weird things happen to me to finally get the "light bulb" turned on in my head. This was one of those obscure reads that did it. I have realized my nagging and my attitude which is triggered by the way my fiance does things. And if it takes a story about a sea lion, a turtle, a plant to help me, BRING IT ON!!!

What I got is not that she was communicating...I took it that she was training him. Two different things. Yes a couple can tweak themselves for each other...like D hates when I squish the toothpaste tube wherever I want...so now I try to do it from the bottom...or get mentadent in the container, lol. But it's only after we communicated with each other that we change certain behaviors....this woman essentially put a mackeral in the air and yelled 'here boy! good boy!'

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

cmon then, out with it!!!

a.a... very nice..i think the ladies will enjoy this tale more than the men

was wanting a prof opin....now I could be a full of chit ballbreaker, or this lady is a condescending cow

[almaty 19]

I didn't take it that way at all, man being an animal and stuff like that. It is all about COMMUNICATION.

That is why I loved it so much. It took the writer to get out of her logic and look at her relationship and communication with her husband from a different perspective. We all learn in different ways and weird things happen to me to finally get the "light bulb" turned on in my head. This was one of those obscure reads that did it. I have realized my nagging and my attitude which is triggered by the way my fiance does things. And if it takes a story about a sea lion, a turtle, a plant to help me, BRING IT ON!!!

What I got is not that she was communicating...I took it that she was training him. Two different things. Yes a couple can tweak themselves for each other...like D hates when I squish the toothpaste tube wherever I want...so now I try to do it from the bottom...or get mentadent in the container, lol. But it's only after we communicated with each other that we change certain behaviors....this woman essentially put a mackeral in the air and yelled 'here boy! good boy!'

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

cmon then, out with it!!!

a.a... very nice..i think the ladies will enjoy this tale more than the men

was wanting a prof opin....now I could be a full of chit ballbreaker, or this lady is a condescending cow

go with the cow

[Ivanovo 0]

I didn't take it that way at all, man being an animal and stuff like that. It is all about COMMUNICATION.

That is why I loved it so much. It took the writer to get out of her logic and look at her relationship and communication with her husband from a different perspective. We all learn in different ways and weird things happen to me to finally get the "light bulb" turned on in my head. This was one of those obscure reads that did it. I have realized my nagging and my attitude which is triggered by the way my fiance does things. And if it takes a story about a sea lion, a turtle, a plant to help me, BRING IT ON!!!

What I got is not that she was communicating...I took it that she was training him. Two different things. Yes a couple can tweak themselves for each other...like D hates when I squish the toothpaste tube wherever I want...so now I try to do it from the bottom...or get mentadent in the container, lol. But it's only after we communicated with each other that we change certain behaviors....this woman essentially put a mackeral in the air and yelled 'here boy! good boy!'

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

cmon then, out with it!!!

a.a... very nice..i think the ladies will enjoy this tale more than the men

was wanting a prof opin....now I could be a full of chit ballbreaker, or this lady is a condescending cow

go with the cow

both but i agree with you lisad

[JanaknJanet 1]

Thanks for the post... loved it..

reminded me that I need to continue reading my Dr. Laura's book care and feeding of husbands.. ...

gotta love our men..

[Fandango 1,440]

Man, I cannot believe how wound up I am from this. I love D with all my heart...NOTHING could dull my love for him...not losing his keys or throwing stuff on the floor...nothing. And not only do I love him, but I RESPECT him for the person he is. Don't get me wrong, he has bad habits...but at the end of the day, they are part of who he is. He can change if he wants or not, but I will never look down my nose at him.

OH, and as an aside, I think if this were an article about a man training his wife like they train animals, there'd be a chitstorm up in here....

Again, jmo

[JanaknJanet 1]

Woaaaaa I posted before reading all of this.. .. ... maybe it will teach me a lesson....

I agree.. no one should treat their loved ones as if they are to be trained..

But reading it .. did infact remind me.. we are human..

we listen to what is around us.

learn.. and remember why you fell in love with the man you are with.

I wouldnt change Jan for the life of me..

I would cherish each sock. or shirt dropped to the floor... ..

After all.. .. DAMIT he would be here... right.. .. let him pile.. let him make lil man noises... .. let me wake in the night and just simply listen to his lil snores.. .. .. what a gift it would be..

I think we all just kinda get lost in the ME part of this. all...

we need to read this and remind ourselves.... it is a US.. not me not him.. ..

Never try to change.. nor train.. if that is the case.. whom is the one that needs the help?....

I think reading this .. if you read it in the comically sense it is good... but reality .. hello. train your man.. pshaaaa.. accept with grace. that he is there.. and honor him for being your love.. cherish each moment.. .. for fate. could take that away so fast..

[Jaylen Brit 1]

Well..I agree the article is kinda tongue in cheek comparing animal training to foster more 'wanted' behaviours in a spouse, and the tone is pretty faceatious, but child behavioural therapy uses VERY similar techniques!

You praise the behaviours you want and ignore the ones you don't (which is very hard at times cos kids are masters of manipulation of adults) - and it works.

Gvivng attention (even negative attention like shouting, punishments) sometimes has no effect on kids because they feel like they aren't getting ENOUGH attention (may not be the case, but if the kids FEEL that way then to them its reality) will often encourage behaviours that are 'unwanted' by parents; such as whining, rudeness etc etc whereas praise for 'good' (aka desirable) behaviours (like politeness, calm, helping round the house etc) will turn the tide.

It works best of all with small children but it can be applied to any age - tho I hadn't thought of using it on adults, but hey..its no different than 'being nice to hubby when you want something'..plenty of lasies use the old 'soften him up' technique (not me btw, mainly cos I never think of it, I usually just ASK, lol) but anyway, I'm not surprised it works on animals as well, lol.

Edited June 26, 2006 by Jaylen Brit

[*Robert* 2]

another one of those threads that makes you go.... all together now....

hmmmmmmmmmm