What cultural differences come up in your relationship?

[Marina-Del 10]

Hey guys!

I've been reading around the forumn today because I have nothing better to do! (I'm still looking for a job here in Brazil, so until I find one.....)

Anyway, people mention that it is important to get to know your SO before you start petitioning/get married because there are problems in relationships between two different cultures that don't arise in relationships where both people are from the same country.

I've been dating my soon-to-be-husband for 2 years now. We met while we were both living in London and working at the same place. We lived in London together for a while, then in Italy, and now we live together in Brazil. In the 2 years that we have been together, the biggest fights that we have had have been because we misunderstood each other! We communicate in English together (very rarely Portuguese, but I'm working on this!). Anyway, most often the fight begins because one of us has said something that really upsets the other. But after hours of arguing and being mad, we step back and realise we are both saying the same thing! And that the fight probably wouldn't have happened at all if we were both speaking the same language! Don't get me wrong, my guy speaks VERY good English...but even with couples that are both native speakers of the same language you can see this happen...so how much more must it happen to couples like us!?

Anyway, this got me to thinking....what are some of the cultural differences that have caused issues in your relationship? Maybe it was only a one time fight or maybe it has become a big deal! I'm just curious!

Hope I get some interesting responses!

Did I mention I have a degree in Anthropology This stuff is very interesting to me!

Edited March 18, 2009 by Marina-Del

[Peikko 1,575]

He doesn't understand my relationship with the BBC! Scandalous, but true.

[EstebanTrabajos 7]

planning and "personal space," which whites seem to love...

besides that she is crazy about me, ohhh yeah B)

[Nessa 23]

i can't think of too many examples right now. here's one that's been happenign and we had an argument over it a week ago. Sometimes I speak my english brazilian style lol, like we don't do the ''you are etc'' ''are you etc'' in order to be a question or an affirmation in portuguese. so sometimes instead of saying are you doing this? i say ''you are doing this?'' enphasizing that it is a question with my tone of voice in the end of the sentence. I found out that it doesn't work, i have to use proper english, otherwise hubby gets mad i'm bossing him around instead of asking if he's doing something

i don't think there is that many difference between cultures in our case. we don't have religious difference, we're both from german descent, i dont know what else now.

there are things that i don't consider a big issue that i used to do in brazil and i just can't get to do american style here. like for example, we have our main meal at noon, here you have supper at night. i can't do that. my body just won't adjust to that. so we eat our main meal (except on work days) early, not as early as i used to in brazil, but somewhere in between. and he's getting used to that.

i'll post more later.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

Fish. Stinky fish.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...hl=divorce+fish

Edited March 18, 2009 by Mister_Bill

[Nessa 23]

Fish. Stinky fish.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...hl=divorce+fish

[pedroh 21]

boiled kernels with mayo and hot sauce and lime

[EstebanTrabajos 7]

boiled kernels with mayo and hot sauce and lime

u forgot the cheese!

*drooling*

and yeah the wife is grossed out especially about that, I'm grossed out about PB&J guacala!

Edited March 18, 2009 by TävôLuDô

[ya falaha! 0]

His accent is so darn cute that I can't help but mock him. It's not in a mean way. I really can't help myself.

For example..."I think so" sounds like "I sink so"...cute!

[Marina-Del 10]

i can't think of too many examples right now. here's one that's been happenign and we had an argument over it a week ago. Sometimes I speak my english brazilian style lol, like we don't do the ''you are etc'' ''are you etc'' in order to be a question or an affirmation in portuguese. so sometimes instead of saying are you doing this? i say ''you are doing this?'' enphasizing that it is a question with my tone of voice in the end of the sentence. I found out that it doesn't work, i have to use proper english, otherwise hubby gets mad i'm bossing him around instead of asking if he's doing something

i don't think there is that many difference between cultures in our case. we don't have religious difference, we're both from german descent, i dont know what else now.

there are things that i don't consider a big issue that i used to do in brazil and i just can't get to do american style here. like for example, we have our main meal at noon, here you have supper at night. i can't do that. my body just won't adjust to that. so we eat our main meal (except on work days) early, not as early as i used to in brazil, but somewhere in between. and he's getting used to that.

i'll post more later.

Yeah! I'm having to get used to that here too -but the opposite side as you! I just can't seem to get used to the fact that I'm supposed to have bread and butter or a small sandwich for dinner! I'm getting better though! Often times it will be around dinner time and I'll start to think about how good it will be to have a big nice hot meal, and then I remember that I've already HAD a big nice hot meal and I only get to have a sandwich for dinner! hehe!

And while my body is taking time to get used to this, I do think it is a better way! It's so much better for your body to eat the big meal during the day and then burn it off, instead of eating the big meal at night!

But, you are used to what you are used to!

boiled kernels with mayo and hot sauce and lime

u forgot the cheese!

*drooling*

and yeah the wife is grossed out especially about that, I'm grossed out about PB&J guacala!

I have really never understood why other cultures are so grossed out by peanut butter and jelly! Why!? It's soooooo good! Even when I lived in London they were grossed out by that! Try it....how can you not like it?!

[EstebanTrabajos 7]

because it's gross!

Since the majority rules...we declare PB&J gross. Period.

[MissStacey 1]

Nothing really drastic for us.

The culture is New Orleans is different that it was in Canada (and I'm sure different than it is in other States in the US) The more I learn about it and the more I get to experience, the more I love it.

Edited March 18, 2009 by MissStacey

[one...two...tree 2,762]

IMO, if your parents would get into a shouting match whenever they argued, chances are you will too, whether you were born in Brazil or France. For us, our family traits have a bigger influence on how we handle conflict than any cultural influences. My wife's mother is temperamental from time to time. She has 3 older sisters and none of them inherited this gift, but she definitely has been blessed with the same temperament.

[kpic 0]

because it's gross!

Since the majority rules...we declare PB&J gross. Period.

The one thing that my husband will never understand is my addiction to novelas.. he says that I had spent most of the days of my life watching those "damn" novelas like he says.. which he is probably right.. but Oh well too bad for him because no matter what .. watching novela is mandatory.. lol

[EstebanTrabajos 7]

I hate novelas and I was born in the country where pretty much the finale is equal to Obama's swearing in.

Hate them...