K-1 denied...now what?

[rebeccajo 14]

That's your opinion, Damian. And as we've seen repeatedly, you have loads of them.

And you don't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????????????????????????

OMFG, you've just my day!!!

You must be really bored.

[Gemmie 142]

I agree with Damian.. I'm all for telling the truth but when you're facing a 3 year ban for something that may have happened years ago, I wouldn't admit to it.

[Damian P 92]

You must be really bored.

Well it is Sunday.

[akimont88 0]

Now again let me be honest here...it certainly wasn't years ago. It was last year. But again, neither of us could care less whether we touched another joint, or beer even, for that matter. It's just something that was done in social situations, and in controlled environments. The point here is that they make her out to be some strung out druggie who's going to come to the US and become a burden on the system all while corrupting other upstanding Americans to do the same. The law is completely black and white. Admit to more than twice in the past 3 years, 3 year ban. No tolerance. They have marijuana lumped in with crack, meth, and heroin, which is just completely insane (makes me think of Dave Chappelle and Bob Saget in Half Baked). Bill Maher also has a great bit on our country's hypocritical stance on drugs. Well worth checking out.

But no matter how upset I might get over these hypocrisies, it's not going to bring me any closer to the woman I love. I had a friend give me some great advice...somehow find a way to be grateful for what has happened. It was hard to imagine at first, but I am slowly seeing how having that attitude opens me up the the bigger picture, rather than this segment I am so intent on focusing on. Because the truth of the matter is...We are going to be together, no mater what. This is all only temporary. Being grateful for what has happened opens my heart up to the possibilities that exist now, a whole new adventure to be embraced. Some see catastrophe, others see opportunity. I'm looking for the latter.

[rebeccajo 14]

Now again let me be honest here...it certainly wasn't years ago. It was last year. But again, neither of us could care less whether we touched another joint, or beer even, for that matter. It's just something that was done in social situations, and in controlled environments. The point here is that they make her out to be some strung out druggie who's going to come to the US and become a burden on the system all while corrupting other upstanding Americans to do the same. The law is completely black and white. Admit to more than twice in the past 3 years, 3 year ban. No tolerance. They have marijuana lumped in with crack, meth, and heroin, which is just completely insane (makes me think of Dave Chappelle and Bob Saget in Half Baked). Bill Maher also has a great bit on our country's hypocritical stance on drugs. Well worth checking out.

But no matter how upset I might get over these hypocrisies, it's not going to bring me any closer to the woman I love. I had a friend give me some great advice...somehow find a way to be grateful for what has happened. It was hard to imagine at first, but I am slowly seeing how having that attitude opens me up the the bigger picture, rather than this segment I am so intent on focusing on. Because the truth of the matter is...We are going to be together, no mater what. This is all only temporary. Being grateful for what has happened opens my heart up to the possibilities that exist now, a whole new adventure to be embraced. Some see catastrophe, others see opportunity. I'm looking for the latter.

Good luck to you both.

I'm pretty sure you're going to be just fine.

[Brad and Vika 129]

Now again let me be honest here...it certainly wasn't years ago. It was last year. But again, neither of us could care less whether we touched another joint, or beer even, for that matter. It's just something that was done in social situations, and in controlled environments. The point here is that they make her out to be some strung out druggie who's going to come to the US and become a burden on the system all while corrupting other upstanding Americans to do the same. The law is completely black and white. Admit to more than twice in the past 3 years, 3 year ban. No tolerance. They have marijuana lumped in with crack, meth, and heroin, which is just completely insane (makes me think of Dave Chappelle and Bob Saget in Half Baked). Bill Maher also has a great bit on our country's hypocritical stance on drugs. Well worth checking out.

But no matter how upset I might get over these hypocrisies, it's not going to bring me any closer to the woman I love. I had a friend give me some great advice...somehow find a way to be grateful for what has happened. It was hard to imagine at first, but I am slowly seeing how having that attitude opens me up the the bigger picture, rather than this segment I am so intent on focusing on. Because the truth of the matter is...We are going to be together, no mater what. This is all only temporary. Being grateful for what has happened opens my heart up to the possibilities that exist now, a whole new adventure to be embraced. Some see catastrophe, others see opportunity. I'm looking for the latter.

Great attitude and perspective

[aaaa 0]

There are so many conflicting things on here about this topic. You say here that if you admit to any more than two times using in the past 3 years, it results in a 3 year ban, but others have said any use in your lifetime results in the same ban. Does anyone know what the actual law or requirement is? And are they counting solely on your honesty? If so, why don't people just not tell the truth, or does it come up somehow in your testing? If someone tried drugs 5 years ago, does the 3 year ban apply to them as well?

Now again let me be honest here...it certainly wasn't years ago. It was last year. But again, neither of us could care less whether we touched another joint, or beer even, for that matter. It's just something that was done in social situations, and in controlled environments. The point here is that they make her out to be some strung out druggie who's going to come to the US and become a burden on the system all while corrupting other upstanding Americans to do the same. The law is completely black and white. Admit to more than twice in the past 3 years, 3 year ban. No tolerance. They have marijuana lumped in with crack, meth, and heroin, which is just completely insane (makes me think of Dave Chappelle and Bob Saget in Half Baked). Bill Maher also has a great bit on our country's hypocritical stance on drugs. Well worth checking out.

But no matter how upset I might get over these hypocrisies, it's not going to bring me any closer to the woman I love. I had a friend give me some great advice...somehow find a way to be grateful for what has happened. It was hard to imagine at first, but I am slowly seeing how having that attitude opens me up the the bigger picture, rather than this segment I am so intent on focusing on. Because the truth of the matter is...We are going to be together, no mater what. This is all only temporary. Being grateful for what has happened opens my heart up to the possibilities that exist now, a whole new adventure to be embraced. Some see catastrophe, others see opportunity. I'm looking for the latter.

[Ginger cat 3]

Now again let me be honest here...it certainly wasn't years ago. It was last year. But again, neither of us could care less whether we touched another joint, or beer even, for that matter. It's just something that was done in social situations, and in controlled environments. The point here is that they make her out to be some strung out druggie who's going to come to the US and become a burden on the system all while corrupting other upstanding Americans to do the same. The law is completely black and white. Admit to more than twice in the past 3 years, 3 year ban. No tolerance. They have marijuana lumped in with crack, meth, and heroin, which is just completely insane (makes me think of Dave Chappelle and Bob Saget in Half Baked). Bill Maher also has a great bit on our country's hypocritical stance on drugs. Well worth checking out.

But no matter how upset I might get over these hypocrisies, it's not going to bring me any closer to the woman I love. I had a friend give me some great advice...somehow find a way to be grateful for what has happened. It was hard to imagine at first, but I am slowly seeing how having that attitude opens me up the the bigger picture, rather than this segment I am so intent on focusing on. Because the truth of the matter is...We are going to be together, no mater what. This is all only temporary. Being grateful for what has happened opens my heart up to the possibilities that exist now, a whole new adventure to be embraced. Some see catastrophe, others see opportunity. I'm looking for the latter.

well, welcome to America...

I mean, they can't bear seeing the beautiful courbet painting 'l'origine du monde" qualifying it as obscene but they have the largest porn industry porn in the world....

they are over selective about ppl coming in their country and yet they have the biggest rate of ignorant citizens.

((((((((((((america, wolrd of incoherences, contradictions))))))))))

[Carlawarla 1]

There are so many conflicting things on here about this topic. You say here that if you admit to any more than two times using in the past 3 years, it results in a 3 year ban, but others have said any use in your lifetime results in the same ban. Does anyone know what the actual law or requirement is? And are they counting solely on your honesty? If so, why don't people just not tell the truth, or does it come up somehow in your testing? If someone tried drugs 5 years ago, does the 3 year ban apply to them as well?

Now again let me be honest here...it certainly wasn't years ago. It was last year. But again, neither of us could care less whether we touched another joint, or beer even, for that matter. It's just something that was done in social situations, and in controlled environments. The point here is that they make her out to be some strung out druggie who's going to come to the US and become a burden on the system all while corrupting other upstanding Americans to do the same. The law is completely black and white. Admit to more than twice in the past 3 years, 3 year ban. No tolerance. They have marijuana lumped in with crack, meth, and heroin, which is just completely insane (makes me think of Dave Chappelle and Bob Saget in Half Baked). Bill Maher also has a great bit on our country's hypocritical stance on drugs. Well worth checking out.

But no matter how upset I might get over these hypocrisies, it's not going to bring me any closer to the woman I love. I had a friend give me some great advice...somehow find a way to be grateful for what has happened. It was hard to imagine at first, but I am slowly seeing how having that attitude opens me up the the bigger picture, rather than this segment I am so intent on focusing on. Because the truth of the matter is...We are going to be together, no mater what. This is all only temporary. Being grateful for what has happened opens my heart up to the possibilities that exist now, a whole new adventure to be embraced. Some see catastrophe, others see opportunity. I'm looking for the latter.

There is nothing conflicting about it at all. You're asked at your medical if you've ever used drugs. Period. If you answer yes, you're given a ban, and must overcome it. Whether you used once, twice or 10 times. We advocate on VJ here that you never lie to any person during this immigration process. That's why the OP's fiance told the truth at the medical. That's why it resulted in her ban.

Adam, while my heart breaks for you two right now in that you have to make new plans to be together, my heart swells with your attitude and love for each other. You two will handle many obstacles throughout life. This has certainly made your relationship stronger. All the very best to you both.

[ginger1981 0]

I'm all for advocating the truth to, but surely there are exceptional circumstances and this would be one of them. Why should mild past experimentation be punished so harshly? Surely there are exceptions to the rules and in this situation this isn't something that the OP's wife wasn't given a criminal conviction for (and the immigration officials can't detect in any other way)...I don't see the point in telling the truth in this situation.

[Carlawarla 1]

I'm all for advocating the truth to, but surely there are exceptional circumstances and this would be one of them. Why should mild past experimentation be punished so harshly? Surely there are exceptions to the rules and in this situation this isn't something that the OP's wife wasn't given a criminal conviction for (and the immigration officials can't detect in any other way)...I don't see the point in telling the truth in this situation.

This isn't about what we think or what we would do if we were the Consulate. These are the rules, regardless of what we personally think. Their are no procedures where exceptions can be made. I don't know if you were stating your opinion or asking if there was some way this couple could overcome this issue given the circumstances.

Again, while it's the individual's ultimate decision about whether or not to lie, we cannot on VJ advocate to do this, as it's against TOS.

[ginger1981 0]

I'm all for advocating the truth to, but surely there are exceptional circumstances and this would be one of them. Why should mild past experimentation be punished so harshly? Surely there are exceptions to the rules and in this situation this isn't something that the OP's wife wasn't given a criminal conviction for (and the immigration officials can't detect in any other way)...I don't see the point in telling the truth in this situation.

This isn't about what we think or what we would do if we were the Consulate. These are the rules, regardless of what we personally think. Their are no procedures where exceptions can be made. I don't know if you were stating your opinion or asking if there was some way this couple could overcome this issue given the circumstances.

Again, while it's the individual's ultimate decision about whether or not to lie, we cannot on VJ advocate to do this, as it's against TOS.

There are certain situations in which the truth in fact does not set you free (I'm sure if some husbands gave an honest answer to "do I look fat" to their wives they'll live to regret it). Like I said I don't advocate lying, but the consequences are extremely harsh for the occasional joint...especially when it was several years ago. I suppose I was more or less stating an opinion...and the USCIS has a different opinion from mine.

I would imagine though if everyone was 100% truthful on that subject that there would be far fewer approved applicants. I just think it is prudent to leave the past to the past and just carry on with your life

[tinman 33]

And I always wondered, what if my fiancee was from Netherlands and legally smokes marijuana? Are fiancees banned from the USA if the do something in another country, which is legal in THAT country but illegal in the USA?

Marijuana is not legal in the Netherlands, rather it's been decriminalised, meaning that the punishment for possession is minor and generally not even enforced.

My heart goes out to Adam and his fiancee for these unanticipated challenges, however I still believe telling the truth is best. I think Adam has a great attitude about the situation and the couple shall be together soon, one way or another. All the best.

All Of you folks are consideralably empathetic to a stranger situation....I am amazed at the support, and condolences...and well wishers each of you have exhibited!

Another prominent website would have had so-called "guests"..makin in appropriate and sarcastic comments.

I am sure much of the credit goes to the Moderators here...but also to the "genuine" good hearts of all the rest of you!

My hat's off to such good quality people!

[JayJay 4]

Aww boy, I read the OP and honestly dude, that totally sucks. I am so sorry. I mean geez...gosh I don't know. It always makes my head spin that there are liquor stores attached to Wal Mart and each and every day you can watch "America's Dumbest Criminals" - most of whom are drunk - but that you can be banned for smoking a substance that almost always makes one a much more chilled-out person. I mean, you don't see pot heads going around smashing up other people's faces, do you? Yet there are at least four bars in every small town, containing about a hundred people a night doing just that.

Bah humbug to that law, methinks. Personally I'm "clean as a whistle" (well, currently I am smoking about three cigs a day simply because I'm not pregnant yet - one could call it an "I'm not pregnant yet" hissy fit - one which I am sure I'll get over in the next few weeks). Nevertheless, it's so ironic that so many violent things, or violence-inducing things are legal here (like having 30 beers and then a shooting contest with your next door neighbor) but something like marijuana isn't, when it's such a peaceful thing, really.

Hope you guys get to be together and happy soon Don't let this make either one of you feel "branded" - you sound like awesome human beings. *HUGE hugs* to both of you. XXX

[Noble Time 0]

Hello all,

A few weeks ago, my fiancee had her interview in Montreal and was denied because at her medical interview, she admitted to using marijuana before. She is not allowed to immigrate now for three years and is required to go to rehab and receive monthly drug tests over those three years to show she is rehabilitated. As much as it doesn't matter now, I want to be perfectly clear upfront...She has never purchased it in her life and her use of it was infrequent at best. How there is no appeal process or gray area here is astounding. Even the immigration officer who denied her said so and admitted that the law, in this case, was "archaic". But I understand that the law is the law, no matter how much I disagree with it, and sometimes being honest about how we have lived our lives bites us back.

I think your fiance should have lied, You have to REALIZE that these people are not like mom or dad or sisters or best friend that are understanding to you and would appreciate your honesty, they are jerks (not all them but most are). That's what you get for being upfront with jerks, straigh up. I'm not saying you should lie where there is risk of you getting catch but for someting like that, smoking pot once in a blue moon, she shouldn't have said anything and there would have been no way for them to find out.