Why Marriage Has Become a Raw Deal for Men

[franklie 0]

Many of us here in VisaJourney have been previously divorced. Does this essay contain any truth?

Don't Marry Essay. Why Marriage Has Become a Raw Deal for Men

from the article;

Society automatically paints a stereotype on men who hesitate, delay, or elect not to marry. They are labelled as:

a) womanizers who are unable to participate in a long term relationship, or

B) Selfish/childish/irresponsible men who can not take care of themselves or another person.

No other explanation is ever explored.

It's a pretty brutal article.

[morocco4ever 63]

[Also, contrary to feminist propaganda, women do indeed get paid the same salary as men, given they are willing to work the same types of jobs as men, and work as many hours as their male counterpart.]

Wrong, I have worked in payroll and see the discrepancy first hand. I am bound not to say anything however.

[Despite this reality, many women come into a marriage with very little assets, and often, are saddled with substantial debt.]

Proof? My ex layed a butt load of debt on his wife when they got married. Poor girl is over her head now.

[A significant number of 20 and 30-something women spend most of their disposable income on luxury rental apartments, upscale restaurants, frequent exotic vacations, leased cars, spa treatments, and excessive amounts of clothing, purses, shoes, etc.]

Proof?

[For starters, men are forced (yes, forced) to spend their hard earned savings (or take a loan) on a diamond ring.]

My ring is modest. I highly doubt that there is a large number of women that put a huge value on the ring over the love of a good man. And if you are talking a traditional wedding, well the bride or her family is paying huge bucks for the reception.

[A wedding is no longer for the bride and groom. As today's Bridezilla gleefully reminds you, "This is MY day". ]

TV show, meant for ratings.

[The injustices can go from bad to worse when children enter the picture. If the man can afford to carry the entire financial burden, the woman can elect to stop working.]

Most people love their children, man or woman. If at all possible it is beneficial for either parent to stay home with the children so they can ensure good and safe care. It could be either parent, but due to the injustice on the first quote it usually falls on the woman. Try being a stay at home mother. Do you honestly think it is easy?

Gawd I am not going any further reading this #######. Obviously someone peed in his cheerios. This man should never get married. He should hire maids, cooks, and hookers.

There are good people, there are bad people. We are responsible for the choices we make. If you selected someone like the women this man portrays then all that tells me is that he was thinking with something other than his brain.

[NicoleX08 1]

wow... some girl must have broke this guys heart for him to be this bitter towards women...

[truffles 2]

Hmm... men are just as capable of being "users and abusers" of the situations.

As a TV programe has already been used by the author as a valid demonstration of his point then I would refer to "Judge Judy" and how many women have taken men to court simply to get them to do the right thing - to be responsible and moral.

Its is behaviours that cause problems not genders.

[Jenn! 918]

I actually think there's a lot of truth in what he says. Also, he does make it clear that he is generalizing and what he's saying does not apply to ALL women. I thought the diamond engagement ring was a good example.

I hate double standards too.

[GiGii 4]

Some of these generalizations make it seem like the article is from a while ago.

Men still make more money than women, I dont think that will ever change.

I dont think they are "forced" into buying a certain type of ring. The girl doesnt go out to pick it, cause if she did, he'd have a much larger bill.

Speaking of expenses, if the guy that wrote that list is so bitter, it must mean the chick had one heck of a good divorce attorney!

[msu17 0]

What IS he on about with the wife staying at home? A lot of the time it makes financial sense since childcare is so freaking expensive. In addition, I think I would have to kill myself if someone told me I had to be a stay-at home mom for more than 3 months. Seriously, SO not for me, nor any of the women I know.

Are there stupid, selfish, lazy women out there like this man described? Of course but its your fault if you marry one. You know what you're getting into, so be a man and stop whining. And really, how many deadbeat dads are there out there? LOTS. THere are always going to be lazy, selfish, stupid people of both genders out there, so that's why one should actually get ot know their future spouse and not marry ASAP.

And WHY is he talking about her mess becomes your mess, blah blah blah. I'm sorry, but you should know how much your spouse has in debt BEFORE marriage, as once the marriage is completed it becomes your prob, not when the woman stops working.

Edited September 24, 2008 by msu17

[Scott & Lai 12]

[Also, contrary to feminist propaganda, women do indeed get paid the same salary as men, given they are willing to work the same types of jobs as men, and work as many hours as their male counterpart.]

Wrong, I have worked in payroll and see the discrepancy first hand. I am bound not to say anything however.

So, you are saying that in a company with a male and female employee who are both doing the same work, the same position, the same number of hours, who brought the same work experience and the same skill set to the job, that the woman is getting a smaller salary??

[For starters, men are forced (yes, forced) to spend their hard earned savings (or take a loan) on a diamond ring.]

And if you are talking a traditional wedding, well the bride or her family is paying huge bucks for the reception.

Someone forgot to inform my inlaws of that one.

Edited September 24, 2008 by Scott & Lai

[sly_wolf 199]

Many of us here in VisaJourney have been previously divorced. Does this essay contain any truth?

Don't Marry Essay. Why Marriage Has Become a Raw Deal for Men

from the article;

Society automatically paints a stereotype on men who hesitate, delay, or elect not to marry. They are labelled as:

a) womanizers who are unable to participate in a long term relationship, or

B) Selfish/childish/irresponsible men who can not take care of themselves or another person.

No other explanation is ever explored.

It's a pretty brutal article.

I have been divorced and I can tell you that my experience was something from hell. Family Law in many places has some serious serious problems and the negative comments from people is a reaction due to those failed systems. Unfortunately some professions also profit greatly from those failed systems so there is no rush to fix them.

I do get very tired of hearing the gender nonsense. What annoyes me even more are the constant quotes from studies that are biased, contradictory and self serving. Most studies are usually undertaken with the aim of achieving a desired end result. Experience has taught me that .... "there are people that have integrity and there are people that don't" Having integrity or the lack of is not gender specific.

The woman I am married to now has tons of integrity .... I do feel lucky now )

Sly

[SpiritAlight 1]

I know more women than men that do not want to nor value marriage.

Sorry they get the "rotten deal" every time in society as it has been set up and followed...

well, by sheeple.

As it turns out the truth is this:

men benefit from being married.

They live longer than single men.

Women do not.

They are happier and healthier single, and live longer when and in close community-living with other women.

[SpiritAlight 1]

Oh and here's some

relief.

An oldie and a goodie!

[mawilson 2,133]

from the article;

Society automatically paints a stereotype on men who hesitate, delay, or elect not to marry. They are labelled as:

a) womanizers who are unable to participate in a long term relationship, or

b) Selfish/childish/irresponsible men who can not take care of themselves or another person.

No other explanation is ever explored.

Sounds like a compliment to me.

[sly_wolf 199]

I know more women than men that do not want to nor value marriage.

Sorry they get the "rotten deal" every time in society as it has been set up and followed...

well, by sheeple.

As it turns out the truth is this:

men benefit from being married.

They live longer than single men.

Women do not.

They are happier and healthier single, and live longer when and in close community-living with other women.

I wonder who did that study ..... another one of those generalizations that serve no purpose. To argue the last point, I personally know women and have known women who socially get along better with men. In addition, I have had many women tell me that they also hate working for women bosses. So I just dont buy the last statement at all.

Sly

[*JG* 2]

Many of us here in VisaJourney have been previously divorced. Does this essay contain any truth?

Don't Marry Essay. Why Marriage Has Become a Raw Deal for Men

from the article;

Society automatically paints a stereotype on men who hesitate, delay, or elect not to marry. They are labelled as:

a) womanizers who are unable to participate in a long term relationship, or

B) Selfish/childish/irresponsible men who can not take care of themselves or another person.

No other explanation is ever explored.

It's a pretty brutal article.

Brutal and chuck full of a bunch of BS!

[Laura+Tom 2]

That article is b*llsh*t.