~July 2007 K-1 Filers~

[BabyBlueSusie 1]

Susie, that made me laugh. I guess because it's the opposite of my experience. I grew up in the midwest with things like drive-through banks. But you know, I sure don't miss them. I like walking everywhere in NY and the more personal feel to everything. A lot of places in the suburbs are lacking in that 'neighborhood' feeling, unless you happen to find a cute small town that's retained it.

Although I do miss big grocery stores with tons of availability and room to actually push a cart or two down the aisles. Here you have to go to a more gourmet type place to find the same things, I think. Ah well, I'm not really complaining; I love the city.

How's Adriano's English coming? Is he adapting any better? I hope so!

Yea, the small, personalized shops is something that I miss the most about NYC. I also miss being able to walk everywhere. Let's not get started on this list though, it will just make me depressed.

Adriano's English is coming along nicely although his attitude hasn't changed much. He still hates it, and I really don't know what to do about it.

[StillThePrettiest 4]

well, to be blunt - he may just have to suck it up...

I don't like the PLACE I'm in all that much - I'm making the best of it, as I've noted before, and of course I'm so glad to be with Dave at last, and all that - but I don't think I'm ever going to love it, or even like it all that much... but there are reasons for me being here, and I made the decision knowing those reasons, and why I was giving up everything I had in London, and it will benefit no one to keep bemoaning the fact

so while I miss London terribly - some times more than others, like right now when my best friend just had a baby - I just have to grit my teeth and smile and BE HERE; there's no law saying I have to love it, but it will be of greater benefit to me and my mental health - and Dave's - if I don't dwell on that all the time

so likewise: Adriano may always dislike it where you are

but he's there for a reason too

[StillThePrettiest 4]

oh, and what I meant to say in that post and didn't -

you shouldn't feel guilty about him not loving it there either; it's got everything to do with what he's used to, and what he's not used to, and you can't magically make it all great for him... obviously you can make SOME things great, the personal things, but you can't change the place, and you shouldn't feel bad because of that

xx

[BabyBlueSusie 1]

well, to be blunt - he may just have to suck it up...

I don't like the PLACE I'm in all that much - I'm making the best of it, as I've noted before, and of course I'm so glad to be with Dave at last, and all that - but I don't think I'm ever going to love it, or even like it all that much... but there are reasons for me being here, and I made the decision knowing those reasons, and why I was giving up everything I had in London, and it will benefit no one to keep bemoaning the fact

so while I miss London terribly - some times more than others, like right now when my best friend just had a baby - I just have to grit my teeth and smile and BE HERE; there's no law saying I have to love it, but it will be of greater benefit to me and my mental health - and Dave's - if I don't dwell on that all the time

so likewise: Adriano may always dislike it where you are

but he's there for a reason too

you shouldn't feel guilty about him not loving it there either; it's got everything to do with what he's used to, and what he's not used to, and you can't magically make it all great for him... obviously you can make SOME things great, the personal things, but you can't change the place, and you shouldn't feel bad because of that

xx

Agreed. I don't like where we are living, but I try really hard to make the best of it and focus on the positive. I wish he could think more like you, and just accept that he is here now, and realize that what is out of his control, is simply that. I know it's hard for him too though. It's a tough situation.

Thanks for the post though, it made me feel a bit better, I must say.

Edited July 13, 2008 by BabyBlueSusie

[tucson_chick 0]

thanks so much for putting it in words, STP, that's exactly the attitude we need!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ah, and on the bright side, please see the new line in my signature!!!

FINALLY today we received the interview notice!!! august 20!!!!!

i hope everybody has a great, positive and loving weekend!!!!

FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HUGS!

[rae_and_scott 1]

Oh my gosh, I just noticed I have a heart!

Oh my gosh, I just noticed I have a heart!

Maybe I should change my name thingy then....

Oh my gosh, I just noticed I have a heart!

Oh my gosh, I just noticed I have a heart!

Maybe I should change my name thingy then....

hahaha, look at that, I quoted myself. Twice!

[Jeraly 4]

I hope everyone is doing fine. Peter is done with his temporary work (permit expires tomorrow), so we'll have the rest of the summer to get on eachother's nerves. Hey...did you guys know that he constantly talks to me during the news??? Dang that gets on my nerves! hehe...isn't this cute!!! We've spent enough time together to get pet peeves! Aint it great! I never thought we'd ever get to that point. But other than that..we really are sooo happy to be together. We spent the 4th of July quizzing eachother over civics questions for the naturalization exam. He's gonna be READY to be a citizen.

You only *just* got pet peeves?! I have a list as long as my arm In fact I had a really good moan about it last night - silly things. Like I mean I don't mind doing the laundry and putting it away and washing up the dishes that can't go in the washer and things like that. What annoys me is when he moans about how I leave soap on the dishes (well he never complained when they were dry and he couldn't tell) and how he leaves a big pile of dirty clothes all over the house instead of putting it in the basket (I know he likes to alternate outfits but that should still mean that he only ever has one shirt and one pair of trousers by the side of his bed at one time... as for there being two pairs of boxers... well I would HOPE that he wouldn't wear them again ) So I have plenty I am sure he has plenty for me as well, but the house is still in disarray and we haven't lived together for two years so we just b*tch and talk it out and I figure with time and patience things will eventually fall into place

As for citizenship... well I haven't even got my teeth into printing the AOS forms and after Jeremy's bank charged him TEN TIMES for going overdrawn when he hadn't even gone overdrawn to start with... well, let's just say that this week's paycheck went into the gas tank so we can't even afford to buy food, let alone AOS *sigh*

All in good time I guess...

At least he finally closed his bank account with cr@ppy BofA like I've been telling him for YEARS.

thanks so much for putting it in words, STP, that's exactly the attitude we need!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ah, and on the bright side, please see the new line in my signature!!!

FINALLY today we received the interview notice!!! august 20!!!!!

i hope everybody has a great, positive and loving weekend!!!!

FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HUGS!

That's great news!!! Also we need to make plans for next month - not sure what you want to do about meeting up - you want to head up to Sedona? It's really beautiful If not then I can talk to Jeremy about taking a detour via Tuscon... of course then I would want to visit Tombstone as well so...

My news of the week (aside from bank charges!) is that I should be able to get my SSN tomorrow/Tuesday!!! Is it exactly two weeks from entering the US or is it an inexact science?

Oh my gosh, I just noticed I have a heart!

HAHAHA

Oh my gosh, I just noticed I have a heart!

Maybe I should change my name thingy then....

YOU REALLY

Oh my gosh, I just noticed I have a heart!

MAKE ME

Oh my gosh, I just noticed I have a heart!

Maybe I should change my name thingy then....

LAUGH

hahaha, look at that, I quoted myself. Twice!

AND YES...

You should change your name thingy

[tucson_chick 0]

peeves - if i would start on this topic, this would become the longest post in VJ-history

let's put it in one sentence: if i wouldn't work fulltime and bring in exactly as much as he does, i wouldn't mind taking care of the house-chores as much - but as i work exactly the same hours for exactly the same paycheck i really don't see a point of being his maid. unless he pays me for it.

@aly: which weekend in august?

let's make plans! it's freaking hot out there in summer. tombstone is great in the evenings when all the saloons and bars are open and the tourists are gone!!!!! LOVE IT!

do you guys have a phone number i could call so we can make plans over the phone and chat about peeves and about the good old times in old europe? otherways i could try to get yahoo messenger running on my laptop and we could chat with via our fingers

[Jeraly 4]

Yippee!! I'm on yahoo messenger all the time (unless I am in linux) but as soon as my own puter is sorted then it will be a permanent fixture - have to reboot into windows in a sec anyway You have my e-mail address, right?

Well the "official" day of our wedding is 8th which I believe is a Friday - maybe we could come back down to you for Saturday night and spend the evening in Tombstone? Obviously I'd have to run it all by Jeremy (after our bank charges nightmare we are kinda strapped for cash ) but we will defo be able to sort things out... I mean our savings are in the UK and I have my credit cards from the UK still

Oooh - it sounds so exciting!

How did that meetup go btw? We met up with a couple of people on Friday and had a lovely time We sat in an open air cafe bar and listened to live music with a few beers - it was really nice

[BabyBlueSusie 1]

@ Aly and Tuscon Chick: Ditto on the maid comments. We argue about this ALL THE TIME because most Albanians tend to be about three decades behind the rest of us when it comes to gender roles. I understand that his mom is a stay at home mom and cooks and cleans to perfection (and any other married women he knows back home, also does all the house work, regardless of whether or not she works), but I am NOT a stay at home wife. I cannot stress this enough to him, and he just doesn't get it. It is especially annoying right now because I am the only one working (even if its only part time), and yet I still have to do 95% of things around the house too. It is a lot of him telling me that he will change, and if I cook he will clean the dishes, but he just never does it. He does cook about half of the time, but he never cleans. That is definitely my number 1 pet peeve. Everytime I bring it up he says 'It's not that hard, I don't see the big deal'. My response is 'Yea, it's not hard for you because you aren't doing anything!!!!!!!' I just don't get it.

[Jeraly 4]

I don't mind doing the cleaning and things right now while I am not working, but it is the fact that he can't just pick up after himself - like if you use a dish, instead of leaving it festering in the sink for three days, just clean it!!! He had four empty cans on his bedside cabinet because he couldn't be bothered to move them and I am sure it isn't that hard to throw his dirty laundry across the room so it even lands vaguely near the basket so I know it is dirty!!! If he cooks then instead of putting things in the dishwasher as they are no longer needed, he lets it all pile up so we'll have a nice meal and then one of us (invariably me cause I can't stand to leave it) will have to tidy it all up - he's quite happy to just leave it there though!!Grr...

I think just the way he has grown up (in trailers with one bedroom despite having a brother and sister as well as his mom living there) has had a big impact on things and it is just breaking him out of bad habits. He doesn't want to live like it but he doesn't realise what a state it is until I point it out!!!

[English Muffin 59]

I don't mind doing the cleaning and things right now while I am not working, but it is the fact that he can't just pick up after himself - like if you use a dish, instead of leaving it festering in the sink for three days, just clean it!!! He had four empty cans on his bedside cabinet because he couldn't be bothered to move them and I am sure it isn't that hard to throw his dirty laundry across the room so it even lands vaguely near the basket so I know it is dirty!!! If he cooks then instead of putting things in the dishwasher as they are no longer needed, he lets it all pile up so we'll have a nice meal and then one of us (invariably me cause I can't stand to leave it) will have to tidy it all up - he's quite happy to just leave it there though!!Grr...

I think just the way he has grown up (in trailers with one bedroom despite having a brother and sister as well as his mom living there) has had a big impact on things and it is just breaking him out of bad habits. He doesn't want to live like it but he doesn't realise what a state it is until I point it out!!!

I hear ya!!

[English Muffin 59]

Whoo Hoooooooo!!! :dance:

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The last processing action taken on your case

Receipt Number: MSC**********

Application Type: I485 , APPLICATION TO REGISTER PERMANENT RESIDENCE OR TO ADJUST STATUS

Current Status: Card production ordered.

On July 12, 2008, we ordered production of your new card. Please allow 30 days for your card to be mailed to you. If we need something from you we will contact you. If you move before you receive the card, call customer service. You can also receive automatic e-mail updates as we process your case. Just follow the link below to register.

Don't have to deal with USCIS again for a couple of years.

[rae_and_scott 1]

My news of the week (aside from bank charges!) is that I should be able to get my SSN tomorrow/Tuesday!!! Is it exactly two weeks from entering the US or is it an inexact science?

It is not an exact science. We waited exactly 2 weeks just to find that Scott wasn't in the system and now we're waiting an additional 4-6 weeks on top of that.

For all you ladies with the housework complaints: I don't think it's *just* a cultural thing (although I'm sure that certainly can also play into it); I think it's largely just an old fashioned male / female thing. This is the number one complaint I know of among ALL of my female friends who are married or living with their partners. It was also my #1 complaint the first time I lived with Scott. It is supremely frustrating when you are the one working outside the home AND inside. I don't know what it is with most guys, that they've had their mothers pick up after them their whole lives, or what, but I just know that this is something almost all of us deal with and complain about. Personally, it's not something I'm willing to accept, so I say keep nagging. Scott used to tell me he hated me nagging him b/c it's behavior that reminded him of his mother, and I said, well that's easy, clean things, and I won't nag you. But I don't know how to fix the problem. I would just say, don't let it rest, and don't accept it. We've come a long way as women (not all the way, mind you, but our options are certainly better than our mother's or grandmother's), but then things can still be so imbalanced in this area, it's so messed up! It really peeves me.

[*julez* 124]

Whoo Hoooooooo!!!

*** DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS E-MAIL ***

The last processing action taken on your case

Receipt Number: MSC**********

Application Type: I485 , APPLICATION TO REGISTER PERMANENT RESIDENCE OR TO ADJUST STATUS

Current Status: Card production ordered.

On July 12, 2008, we ordered production of your new card. Please allow 30 days for your card to be mailed to you. If we need something from you we will contact you. If you move before you receive the card, call customer service. You can also receive automatic e-mail updates as we process your case. Just follow the link below to register.

Don't have to deal with USCIS again for a couple of years.

Fantastic news, Gillian!!!! Congratulations!!!!!!