VinceN

Thanks, this idea sounds like a good compromise. If the Dam Hoi was in April when do you think the right time to start the process would be? If i applied in January would that allow me enough time to have the Dam Hoi before the interview or do you think I should wait longer?

I don't how much sense it would make to start applying a visa for your "fiancee" when she is not even your fiancee yet, she is not your fiancee until the dam hoi. That's just the technical aspect of it, whether it would a make difference I have no idea, but it's something I wouldn't risk.

You seem to be rushing this, that's not a good thing. I know everybody's timeline differs from one to another, but I'll give you our timeline so you can get at least an idea. Damn hoi on 6/19/10, filed on 7/07/10, Visa in had by the end of March 2011.

Years ago I decided to go without insurance between jobs.

Then I blew out my knee.

Paid for it all myself

Won't take that gamble again.

Amen to that, though fortunately enough I never had to experience anything as such. I personally have a few friends who do not have any insurance of any sort (health or dental), I have no idea how they do it but I can't imagine what kinda financial b.s they will have to go through should something bad happen.

nice bike , nice wife too . looking at the picture i think i got more tools than you

You probably do have more tools, I used to have enough to open a small shop when I was still heavily into modding cars, I just did garage overhaul and got rid of everything except for a few essentials to do basis tasks.

So the psychopath accepted money for a sham marriage then deluded himself into thinking it's for real. When she didn't reciprocate he kills her daughter.

I hope he f$&@ing rots in jail.

I think you misread or misuderstood the article, it wasn't' b/c he deluded himself into thinking it's real, it's b/c he can't get out of the marriage soon enough.

This is 2nd line into the article.

But authorities say that after she later refused to give him a speedy divorce,he brutally stabbed her 12-year-old daughter to death.

Either way, off with his balls!!!!

It all depends on the people and the marriage. I do feel like i am being pampered by wife but at the same time, I pampered her and appreciate everything she does for me.

From the posts, it seems like half of the guys are enjoying married life and half are not.

I def don't belong in the latter half. Even though I give up a few things, but it is all worth it. Not only does she do the regular wifey stuff, she also helps me work on my vehicles.

Don't think about it negatively. I should have elaborated in more details to avoid misunderstanding. Most newly wedded VNese brides prob stay at home when they first arrive in the States; therefore, they would have more free time to do the cooking. As time passes and they've found jobs or going back to school, whatever, the hubbies should expect to consume more "Ramen noodle soup" or "pizza, fried chicken, Big Macs, etc" as their "old" lifestyle BEFORE the marriage.

Be prepared to witness "her transition" from the "typical/traditional" VNese to "American". If you can't cook for yourself in the past and now, and she's doing that for you, treat it as a "temporary" thing.

I appreciate and do agree with your perspetive, and I do emphasize on "most" being the keyword. My wife has been working for 3 months now, but she still wakes up couple of hour earlier than she has to to make sure I'll have my breakfast, and my lunch packed. I would sleep in for an extra few mins, by the time I'm ready for work breakfast and lunch is ready to go. I live in her house for a month before our wedding and her mom does the same thing, even though she holds a full time job while her husband stays home and watch over their rental properties. I don't take advantage of her tradition and try to "live like a king" though. I get home from work earlier than she does so I always try to have dinner or help prepping food for the next day.

You expect VNese women will continue to do this "tradition" (preparing meals for their hubbies/families) forever? Sorry to make you smell the coffee but your dream prob would come to an end whenever she's got her 10-year PERM GC. She'd less likely to cook your meals as often as you wish. Not that she no longer cares or loves you. It's just she's had enough time in the States to learn her new freedom rights, being a woman and does whatever she feels like doing.

Enjoy while it lasts, that is!

I can't help but to laugh at profound sense of bitterness, I imagine the poster says it with a tightly clenched jaw and fire in his eyes, I can't help but wonder what happened to the guy.

Married life has been good for me, and I understand that it's young at its stage but I have a pretty good idea where it will be base on important facts such as how she was raised, our beliefs, her immediate family, ect ect, another important factor is I know for a fact she didn't just marry b/c she wanted a GC, I'll spare you the details on that.

Beside having to adjust to the typical married life stuff, I had to give up a few things here and there, and rightfully so. No more bars hopping, no more spending of money on compulsive toy purchase, no more random booty calls or any female friends for that matter.

Well that's certainly a bummer thanks everybody for the responses.

My wife entered the state at the end of June via her K1, we got married in July. Currently we're in the process of AOS. She has obtained a learner permit when her N-94 was still valid, she tried to get her driver license today and they said they can't do it b/c her N-94 has expired and they have no way of knowing if she's here legally, our offer to show the our marriage certificate did not do anything. Anybody ran into this problem before? If so how did you deal with it?

Great place to visit but I would not want to live there, not in the city anyway. The bays are great so are the food.

I always missed out on the good stuff

Dau Que,

Yes, Vietnam government is corrupted. I have known that and have come to accept it...you deal with it and make it work for you.

I know as a non Viet Citizen, you can buy land but have to return it in 50 years...I also know most of the laws in Vietnam...both written and unspoken.

When $$%T hit the fan, these laws which you thought you knew will get bent or throw out the window right in front of you, unless you have enough money to turn the table around, money talk when it comes to laws, both written or unspoken.

But have you seen the younger generation of Vietnam lately? They want to change the country. Most have evolve to embrace the western culture and idealism.

By worshiping Britney Spears, adopting Valentine day & school violence? yes! As far as individual rights/freedom and such, a few more might embrace but none are willing to do anything about it, hell they can't even protest peacefully without being hauled away at night (refer to all the recent protesters against China taking over vietnam's land/islands).

For me, walking around a country where people does not look at me DIFFERENTLY makes me feel at home. I grew up with racism and like it or not, it's still around.

Very true, are you vietnamese? If not then the statement above just doesn't make sense.

The feeling of being free, with no burden, when you set foot in Vietnam is enough for me to bare it's ugly sides.

You're speaking as if you're running away from problem

If you plan well, life is good...plan ill, life is hell...that's everywhere.

Exactly, if you plan it well, you wouldn't need to move to Vietnam to obtain the feeling of being free with no burdens.

Wow.. my response was because I am White? You have a seriously misguided & narrow perception of people of other races as well as VN... Peoples comfort as well as their desire to go to VN has nothing to do with their race. based on the bolded above, you are not going to the right places... I have worked in Vn for many years and the climate is much the same as Florida or Texas... The cleanliness, safety and noise would depend on where you are.. It is far from being everywhere. When it gets too hot, we take a nap, then we wake up and go swim in the lake for a bit... VN may seem chaotic, but it's people are actually more relaxed and laid back that the in US... VN drivers are far more attentive than US drivers... You won't see someone driving down the road in VN putting on makeup or reading a newspaper...

Judging by his sn I can safely assume he is Vietnamese, which make thing sadder than they already are. While everybody is entitled to their own opinion, but some are best kept unsaid.

we have alot of caucasian members here so i knew some might take the statement the wrong way...but yes most of them look miserable to me and not having any fun walking about in the harsh weather. unless you're a vietnam war buff, have family ties, or some business to be there...i don't see the reason to visit that hellhole (spoken with fondest term of endearment). it's always super muggy hot, super dirty, noisy, unsafe, people looking to rip you off everywhere etc.

i wouldn't be caught dead in iraq or afghanistan...and that's about the equivalent of vietnam to white folks imo in term of culture shock and comfort.

Sounds like a very educated statement

I won't be surprised if the OP receives a NOIR and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one. Hope OP the best, provided this is a legitimate petition.

Maybe she'll meet me without her defense lawyer....?

She just went to a prayer conference in Missouri, and mumbled something about going to confession and talking about her lies to me....but she mumbled it so I'm not sure. Her English gets better at times, and worse at others. At this point, I'm not expecting any truth or great revelations, and even if she told me the "truth", I would have no way to know if it was really the "truth". At one point, she tried to explain all her assets by telling me she got kickbacks from companies that did business with her employer, but it did not make much sense, and sounded like someone had helped her dream it up. Every time I press her, she tells me I'm "just playing with her". Maybe (1%?) there's a non sexual explanation for the mountain of evidence, but I expect if I insist on truth that makes sense and that I can believe, she will get angry and walk out, and that will be the end of it.

This is so strange, I need to know the truth, but the truth will probably break everything!

haha....

Oh man...have I known about her being MO I would want to meet this lovely lady! I was in MO for the same thing as well.

Sounds like many many men can't get her out of their head.

Or their heads out of her

I disagree. THEY made a choice to leave give up their lives, where the USC may have chosen to do the same. She made the choice to move, her choice to sell everything. She didn't need or have to. I would not have expected Tony to reset my life back to how it was just as he would not expect the same of me. It's love, not a contract! I took a risk sure, but so did Tony in inviting this immigrant into his life and into his country. Prepare for the worst but hope for the best.

Calling the police is a sane thing to do. We don't know what sort of woman she is but he needs to protect HER and himself. He needs them there to ensure she doesn't cause much of a scene, he needs them there to see he's doing the right thing by trying to pay for her hotel etc while she waits for the flight. Heck if they're worried she'll flip out send a plain clothes policeman so the uniform doesn't scare her or the kids. This sounds inhumane but he's TRYING to get her back home. He's TRYING to be a good guy and she's refusing to go yet you say he should just suck it up? No. He should do what's right for him while not being a pr*ck about it sure.

They made their choice, that is correct. However, they made their choice base on what they could believein at the time. My wife made her choice of leaving her family for the very first time in her life and move across the world believing that I would marry her and taker care of her. That is her choice to make, but she comes over and I refuse to marry her for whatever reason and send her packing after 15 days, how would that look?

Protect herself and himself? You, or any of us, don't know anything about these couples, how can you pass such judgement? Perhaps you know something we don't, b/c so far this is all the orginal poster has posted

Not sure that this is the right area of the forum, but here goes...

The bottom line is that I (the male, petitioner of a K1 and two K2 visas) no longer wish to get married to the K1 visa holder. She has been here 15 days and it is a disaster. On top of that I'm 58 and just (last Friday) lost my job of 8 years.

How can I best extricate myself from this situation?

Of course, the airfare is not an issue... in fact it is already paid... the original tickets were purchased as round trip, and the return flights (for all three people) is this coming Friday, July 29.

But she won't go.

----

This brings up another layer of the discussion:

What legal responsibility do I have? Today? After 90 days?

I assume that I am legally bound to support them until the 90 days period is over; but beyond that, with being married? I don't know.

Note carefully how he titled his thread "PETITIONER doesn't want to get married", as in the poster himself doesn't want to get married. Why? We don't know, it's only been 15 days and he's being awfully vague about it. For all we know, he expected 3 homecooked meals a day followed by a BJ, or she came over and turned out to be a nasty hag, we don't know so enough with the speculations and stick to the legal aspect of the situation like the OP was asking about.

I still don't get why the ticket was a both way ticket from the get-go, and OP seems to be avoiding the question.

Oh and the call the cops comment? Isn't that a little too much without knowing fully the details of the situation? Bet people wouldn't say that if they were on the other side of the fence

I'm starting the AOS process for my wife and I notice the NOA2 is part of the package I'll have to send in. The problem is during our K1 process, I have never received a NOA2, I went straight from NOA1 to a letter notifying me that the NVC has received my approved I-129F petition. Will this be a problem? If so how will I go about getting a copy of the NOA2 when everything is already said and done? Thanks.

Oh man this thread brings back some memory! I remember feeling all anxious and nervous after reading this thread as my wife's interview was going to go down a little over a week.

Isn't the criminal record suppose to be turn in as part of the require civil documents? Did your wife not turn it in and they overlook somehow or she did and they ask for another one?

Like I've stated, she had it with her when she went to her interview, but I'm not sure if they even looked at it at the time. I'm guessing they must have overlooked it or they simply were using that excuse lengthen the waiting time for whatever purpose.

I'm curious with all the negative stuff about her, but there must be something you like about her? Why her? Must be one hot mama..

He already said she's very cute and sexy ect ect.

I've would have dropped it like it's hot long time ago. OP, go with your gut instincts and by the way it sounds, you're heading in the right direction.

OP - I sent my 1st Gen IPhone to my fiancée and it cost about $40 to sent it.

However, when the phone was delivered my fiancee had to pay a $20 tax on it. This is based on the declared value I suspect.

I used USPS and it's pretty reliable.

I used USPS and the cost came out to be the same, the only diff is I sent her an Iphone 3g.

You should remove the electricity cord thingie under the sink, so the garbage disposal not spin rapidly.

Please let her know I feel really bad for her - men who cheat on their wife, is no hell hot enough for them.

Don't forget the microwave too, I've heard of that before.

I was talking to the wifey about earlier today. I told her if she feels the need to chop something, go for something else rather than the family jewel. She said, if she's gonna go for it why not go for the part I value the most......

...I then told her I value my hair over everything else.