nycgirl

To the OP:In all honesty --- get over yourself and move on with your life. The way you are posting says more about you than it says about your ex-wife. Grow up and stop generalizing.

So true.. I was thinking the exact same thing...

To Capt. Graig: you really should stop it.. you said you opened a can of worms but who knows, you might actually be stopping people from marriages which are actually sinsere and in good faith from both sides.

The way you post really looks like you are currently very bitter about what happened. You are not helping anyone in any way with your posts, in fact, you are telling people, in a certain way, to actually stop doing what they are doing. In my opinion you are actually doing more harm than being helpful here.

I am very sorry for you what happened, but look at yourself for a second... there's always more than one person to blame in situations where there are more than one person. You should have opened your eyes a bit more. When you caught her and her daughter lying, or when you heard from others that she was seen with some other dude, that should have ring the alarmbells already.. You have no-one to blame but yourself, only you have let it come that far.. she never forced you to do those things and to continue with it, you did it yourself so you can only blame yourself. Yeah, I agree that she should not have done what she has done but she did and there were signs enough and therefor it is that you can only blame yourself. It is always easier to blame another but, seriously, most of the times people should only blame themselves.

Stop trying to stop others from their actions and choices. What about age? My father was 30 years older than my mother and they lived together up until my dad died a few years ago, and they still loved each other very much.. It was for money? Nah, not really, my dad was not rich or anything.. .they actually LOVED each other.. can you imagine that? Two people loving each other without looking at each others ages? It actually exists and happens frequently.. So you found a rotten apple, it doesn't mean everyone has found a rotten apple all of the sudden. And so what for some people being poor.. I had nothing when I came to the US, I married my wife because I love her, not because she was richer than me.. if we actually break up some day, first thing I would do would be to return to my own country where I come from, not every foreign spouse wants to be here because of the country, there are LOADS of them who actually only are here because of their SO's.

It is really sad that this happened to you and I feel sorry for you and anyone else to whom something like this happens, but like the person said who I quoted: Get over it and go on with your life, you only make it sound like you are a bitter old man who is taking this thing way too far.

Oh, pleeeeease!!!!! Like someone is going to read OP's posts and NOT get married based SOLELY on his experience? What are you smoking? Not bloody likely! He experienced something, TOOK THE BLAME, and talked about it. He is just trying to open other's eye to the possible red flags. VJ is a forum for folks to learn and share. Learn the laws, learn the process, and LEARN from others' experiences (good or bad). If he opens the eyes of even ONE person in a similar situation, then his posts are fruitful. Who are YOU to be telling him that his post are "NOT HELPING ANYONE IN ANY WAY" How would you know that? I don't agree with some of the generalizations on his posts, but people are smart enough to discard what they don't need and absorb what they do need from another member of the forum. This website is not a cheering section internet dating, fast tracking immigration and starry eyed lovers who hardly know each other, but it sure seems like it sometimes.

Close call. Could she not have come over here on a tourist visa for three months first? Instead of just doing a k1 for that reason you should be sure before you even get to that stage. Find another way to spend time together.

Lauren and I spent only a few days together in our initial meetings as we were both backpacking around the the world. However we went back and forth several times over the next year before I decided to come out here for a 3 month stint on visa waiver. That time living together, while still short by many standards, convinced me she was the one. Without that I would not have proposed and would not be here now. (Her parents were not best pleased at the time but have now welcomed me as a member of their family!)

It is very unlikely that she would have got a tourist visa to come over for 3 months. You are in a very fortunate position of coming from a Visa Wavier country so all you have to do is get on a plane fill out a I-94w during the flight and as long as you dont raise red flags at the POE you will be admitted to the US for 90 days.

For those who do not come from a Visa Wavier country it can be almost imposible for them to come and vist before they have their visa.

Every country CAN get a visa to visit the US. If there are red flags maybe that would be it's own warning, no?

What freaking planet are U on Fozzie? And yes, I read your follow up that said Visas can be obtained except in VERY FEW CASES. Seriously, do your research before making a statement like that!!!!!!!

Hi

I have Query, as I became PR of Canada on 07 Nov 2008 and came back to India on 8 Dec 2008. I want to visit U.S.A.

1 I am working here in MNC in India.Can I apply for U.S visa at new Delhi high commission ? I want to spend some time with my cousins.

2 What are the chances of getting me U.S Visa ? I have traveled to U.K as well on work permit a yea ago.

3 Can U.S Consular ask me questions regarding why i came back after becoming PR in canada,if so what can i say ?

4 Can I enter into Canada from U.S ?

5 What all things i need to say or do in order to convince consular ?

6 can U.S consular ask me that i need to apply U.S visa from canada ?

Please advice!!!!!

[/b][/b]

wrong forum.

Hi

I have Query, as I became PR of Canada on 07 Nov 2008 and came back to India on 8 Dec 2008. I want to visit U.S.A.

1 I am working here in MNC in India.Can I apply for U.S visa at new Delhi high commission ? I want to spend some time with my cousins.

2 What are the chances of getting me U.S Visa ? I have traveled to U.K as well on work permit a yea ago.

3 Can U.S Consular ask me questions regarding why i came back after becoming PR in canada,if so what can i say ?

4 Can I enter into Canada from U.S ?

5 What all things i need to say or do in order to convince consular ?

6 can U.S consular ask me that i need to apply U.S visa from canada ?

Please advice!!!!!

[/b][/b]

wrong forum.

Oh dear this is a shocking assumption!!!! I am asking with all sincerity, do you know this person personally and you are therefore enlightening us? Your statement suggests that you do based on the "she is planning to..." and all the other statements I am reading.

it's called "the white elephant in the room", and everyone is ignoring it.

too many of you fools are marrying people from other countries and expecting them to think like you do and have compatible logic and behaviour. truth is, most 2nd and 3rd worlders have very different conceptions of dignity and respectable behaviour. they come here and don't fit in, and their US spouse either educates them, isolates them, or kicks them to the curb. the high number of quick divorces in the K1-USC process is indicative of the number of "green carder seekers", immature immigrants unwilling to be socialised, and USC unwilling to invest years of effort in acclimating their new partner. our country would be less burdened by unsocialised people if it weren't for the high number of fantasy based marriages that go awry.

and yes, i lived with my wife in china for 2 years before we married, so i knew what i was getting into. i have no respect at all for people who claim a "relationship" that consists merely of a 1 week vacation and a bunch of e-mails.

AMEN

hey all yall that just got your hubbies here...

what have you done to build up their credit??

We want to buy a house in a year or two and will need M to have a good credit score

As soon as he gets his SSN we want to get started on that

I dont really want to go credit cards..but will do that if we have to.. thought about just getting one and not telling hubby so he wont be tempted to use it and not pay it off....

Unfortunately, so much of a person's credit (FICO) score has to do with credit HISTORY. He can't build up much history in a year or two, but he can make sure that his brief credit history shows no sign of negative activity. If you suspect that he will use (and abuse) a credit card.....STAY AWAY!! Make sure he's never overdrawn at the bank. Put him on all utility bills, lease, car title and make sure that those get paid on time. If you are buying a house soon, I suspect that your credit score will be the one most closely looked at, so make sure that you are clean as a whistle. Make sure that you get copies of all three credit reports, and be sure to clear up any negative information on them at least a year before you apply for a mortgage. Lenders are incredibly wary at the moment, so one HINT that someone is a credit risk, they will not touch your loan with a ten foot pole!! Best of luck!!!!

I am so thankful I found Claudeth

What does this have to do with the OP's situation?

Claudeth must be one hell of a maid!!!! I'm glad he found her too! hahahahahhahah

He had three foreign wives before you? Hmmmmmmm, red flag. What did you love about him before and after the marriage??? Did he change from the love of your life to this monster overnight? Maybe give a little bit more background. How did things go so rotten??

As for staying in America......IMHO....... If I immigrated ONLY for true love, and my marriage ended, I would be devasted, and would want nothing more than to return to the comfort of my friends and family at home. If I moved across the world for true love......and that true love went sour, I don't think that I would want to hang around and "give it a shot....why not"

What are you giving "a shot"??? Just curious.

No one in this world deserves to be abused, but people need to go into every situation and relationship ESPECIALLY MARRIAGE with eyes wide open!!

By the way, a green card is NOT your property, now or ever. It is the property of the United States Government.

Hi LaDIES! I have a travel question....can a Jamaican travel freely (caribbean, Europe, etc)with a green card? Will he be afforded the same "status" as an American traveler? Or ............if he had needed a Visa to go somewhere before he had his green card, does he still need a visa now?? We are looking to take a Spring trip, and I can't figure out if our options will be limited because of his JA passport.

On a similar note, I came across this Web Question (and subsequent answer), and it doesn't seem accurate to me. Can Jamaicans visit Great Britain and Ireland without a Visa?? Or any of those other countries? I don't think so!!

With a green card he is not a US citizen, he will have to obtain a visa, because he will be using his Jamaican passport. The green card only grants him rights to re-entry the USA without a visa.

I seem to remember that Jomo's Girl gave me the opposite answer once. We went in and out of Canada with no visa. Without his Green Card, he would not have gotten in. Hmmmmmmm.

You can visit Canada, Mexico and some nearby islands, but visiting other places without a visa will depend on your citizenship and not the green card

Where you going NYC?

Ugh, I don't know. We have tons of airline miles, so we can go anywhere on miles. He has his list of desires (Brazil, Paris, Bermuda) and I have my list (Thailand, Greek Islands, Mexico, Dominican Rep.). Now that we have the Visa thing to consider, it will play a factor.

I just want to start going somewhere!!! The chance to travel was taken away from me during the year of kidney failure, and now that I have the opportunity back, I want to take full advantage. You never know how long a donated kidney can last, so I just feel like I want to GO GO GO!!

Jet Blue is starting to fly to Montego Bay in May, so that is also an option, but not sure if we're ready for that again so soon. I want to show him the whole world!!

Thanks! Ugh, I thought this was going to be different. Anyway....for anyone that is wondering....you can find the answers on this site I found. Essentially they are trying to sell their services (they do the paperwork to get you a visa), but its helpful none the less.

http://www.visahq.com/visas.php

Thanks!! Well this is disappointing. For anyone else who's interested, here's a website where you can plug in the country you wish to visit, your country of Citizenship and your country of residence, and it tells you whether or not a visa is required!

http://www.visahq.com/visas.php

Hi LaDIES! I have a travel question....can a Jamaican travel freely (caribbean, Europe, etc)with a green card? Will he be afforded the same "status" as an American traveler? Or ............if he had needed a Visa to go somewhere before he had his green card, does he still need a visa now?? We are looking to take a Spring trip, and I can't figure out if our options will be limited because of his JA passport.

On a similar note, I came across this Web Question (and subsequent answer), and it doesn't seem accurate to me. Can Jamaicans visit Great Britain and Ireland without a Visa?? Or any of those other countries? I don't think so!!

With a green card he is not a US citizen, he will have to obtain a visa, because he will be using his Jamaican passport. The green card only grants him rights to re-entry the USA without a visa.

I seem to remember that Jomo's Girl gave me the opposite answer once. We went in and out of Canada with no visa. Without his Green Card, he would not have gotten in. Hmmmmmmm.

Not sure where to put this question.

My husband has his 2 year green card, and we want to go on vacation (Europe, Turkey, Caribbean.....not sure exactly where yet).

When traveling abroad, does a green card holder have the same travel freedom as a USC? Can my husband go to all the places that I can go to (without a Visa)? Or do foreign Visa rules depend upon which passport you hold??

We traveled freely in and out of Canada, which leads me to believe that he can travel like a USC.

Also, someone once told me that if he is a legal RESIDENT, it doesn't matter that he holds a Jamaican PP, he is free to travel like American PP holders. We are only talking about a 2 week vacation, if that matters. Anyone? Thanks!!

Hi LaDIES! I have a travel question....can a Jamaican travel freely (caribbean, Europe, etc)with a green card? Will he be afforded the same "status" as an American traveler? Or ............if he had needed a Visa to go somewhere before he had his green card, does he still need a visa now?? We are looking to take a Spring trip, and I can't figure out if our options will be limited because of his JA passport.

On a similar note, I came across this Web Question (and subsequent answer), and it doesn't seem accurate to me. Can Jamaicans visit Great Britain and Ireland without a Visa?? Or any of those other countries? I don't think so!!

oops, I forgot the link....here it is

http://www.blurtit.com/q307176.html

Hi LaDIES! I have a travel question....can a Jamaican travel freely (caribbean, Europe, etc)with a green card? Will he be afforded the same "status" as an American traveler? Or ............if he had needed a Visa to go somewhere before he had his green card, does he still need a visa now?? We are looking to take a Spring trip, and I can't figure out if our options will be limited because of his JA passport.

On a similar note, I came across this Web Question (and subsequent answer), and it doesn't seem accurate to me. Can Jamaicans visit Great Britain and Ireland without a Visa?? Or any of those other countries? I don't think so!!

Who knows, but I think he replied with the who cares attitude after he was blasted for jumping from girl to girl.

Troll or not, this stuff happens all the time.

I just wonder if the "#2's" out there know about the "#1's".

someone posted not long ago:

"i was gonna try to get a tourist visa and marry over there, but im married now and doing k3." WOW guy! I guess the wife doesnt know about VJ

Its crazy what people will try and get away with.......but what's crazier is that (I'll bet you anything) the poster of the quote (above) was offered advice and good luck too here!!!

grazie grazie thanks so much for everything , i will go to marry my gurl #2 , i will apply for tourist visa and marry her and she will visit egypt and pyramids sure next time i go to egypt because i live in rome since 6 month and the girl i know now i met her online not at work its long story , and i meet alot of american and canadian men and women thats why i know women i work in beauty center but that doesnt mean i love all of them and dont blame me if i fall in love fast there is no reason i can tell , have you ever seen shot asked the man to kill him or not , so may thanks ciao

thanks again

This is also fraud. Reasoning like this is why this process is getting more and more difficult. This person is NOT willing to following the rules. OP: I don't care about your case, because I'm pretty sure that your story will not fool the US Gov. My message is to the other posters.... Troll or not, please stop helping this clown!!!! Maybe your case is complete, and you feel like you have the knowledge to bestow upon others, but why give it to someone who is so disrespectful of the law. shame on you.

Offering this guy advice and good luck? Are you serious? I know that this website is designed to help people, but do people really think that you should offer help to EVERY CLOWN that comes along? Even if they are trying to commit fraud?? Weird. The guy admits in the very first post that he KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT his first fiance. Sounds like true love to me!!!

People in REAL, LOVING and TRUE relationships continue to face mounting immigration difficulties because of all the fraud perpetuated in this country. And you want to exacerbate the situation by helping people defraud the US gov?

Please re-read the OP's post.

He didn't say he knows nothing about his first fiance, he said "she didnt answer my email and i dont know anything now about her"

I bolded the part you seem to have missed.

He probably meant he doesn't know what she is doing now, because she never answered his emails.

It appears he has a basic grasp of english, and some allowances have to be taken for that.

For the most part, he is looking for some advice, and several people told him what he is planning is fraud, and how to do it legally.

Just calling like I see it. If you believe him, please feel free to help him. And sabotage the system in the process. Sorry, but I smell something REAL fishy!!

If I misconstrued the OP, let him tell us more......how deeply he was in love with American Fiance #1, how she disappeared and he quickly found another LOVE of HIS LIFE.....that happens to be American. Pul-lease people.

thanks on the picha!!

well i can admit I did judge.. i thought it was crazy, foolish and evrything else, back in my younger days LOL we live and learn..cuz now I am walking it out and it is def a leap of faith

he was approved on a visitor visa.. it was his second or third attempt tho.. he said he believes he had a lot more confidence this time, cuz he knew the drill.. i believe he had a woman and he is a charmer fi tru LOL..anyway like all the ladies said its TERRIBLY hard to figure why immigration does what they do when it comes to this visa and its a very high chance for denial.. (shrugs shouldrs)

be blessed

Did he ever come here??

Offering this guy advice and good luck? Are you serious? I know that this website is designed to help people, but do people really think that you should offer help to EVERY CLOWN that comes along? Even if they are trying to commit fraud?? Weird. The guy admits in the very first post that he KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT his first fiance. Sounds like true love to me!!!

People in REAL, LOVING and TRUE relationships continue to face mounting immigration difficulties because of all the fraud perpetuated in this country. And you want to exacerbate the situation by helping people defraud the US gov?

Let me look it up again. As we were scheduled for a Stokes, I did a lot of research a year ago. I'm sure I can find it again. You def need a good lawyer at that point!! BRB

If you fail the Stokes interview, you don't get deported immediately. You can appeal the decision. In court.

We had a stokes interview and it was nothing. But our case was very strong, and my husband has just gotten nervous and stumped during the first interview.

But that's apparently not normal. They are supposedly grueling and long. But its basically an interrogation of possible fraud, so people shouldn't expect it to be easy!!

I really feel in my heart that the truth is normally detected by the officer. They are trained to see fraud, and they process MANY MANY CASES per day.

So if you prepare really well, and are in a real marriage, and have a good lawyer, I feel like you will be fine.

Best of luck!!

I'm the only one bashing this thread?

When did I say that?

Wellllll, I'm the only one mentioned in your post. Babe, don't direct posts at me for bashing the thread. Can't help it if I'm the one getting everyone worked up!

I'm enigmatic!! Don't hate me because I'm enigmatic!!

Do you really find comfort in this story? Comfort? weird.

He came here seeking a podium to trash his imigrant wife, promote his savior (Jeff Owens), and seek unconditional support for his situation. Sorry, he's not geting it from me.

Bolded is patently obvious, the rest speculation. Point made over & over. Again, why do you, or the others, care so much to get all wound up?

Wound up? Certainly not. You haven't seen me wound up. i just happen to have some free time and an opinion. You have my permission to ignore my posts. I am clearly biased towards the voiceless woman in this case. You, he, and anyone else can feel free to ignore me. Isn't the internet wonderful?????