Nothing Ventured, nothing gained.

[xgrnberet1 19]

Absolutely 100% scammed, anyone think otherwise is living in a la la land.

[Hollyday 122]

Powered off phone is a deal breaker. She's hiding something or she doesn't want to talk to you. Cut your losses and move on.

I'm sorry but have you never ridden the subway in your whole life? In many places there's no signal altogether!

[Lenzwei 14]

I appreciate the optimism, but no one rides the subway for a week. Obviously she doesn't want to speak with me, why is the question. A couple of more days and then I'll have to try to move on.

One of the difficulties is the difference in cultures. Maybe Chinese women shut down periodically. I don't know. I do know American women do. Although in my opinion, it's a pretty cruel thing to do in any culture. Especially considering the distance.

She's either:

1) Scared.

2) Feels guilty about leaving her family.

3) Dishonest.

Or a combination of the three.

I may never know the reason, so I'll give it prudent time and then try to let go. Not much else I can do.

[Karee 4,189]

I'm sorry but have you never ridden the subway in your whole life? In many places there's no signal altogether!

You think this girl lives in the subway for days? Interesting.

1) Scared.

2) Feels guilty about leaving her family.

3) Dishonest.

My vote is #3 because of the money.

[Lenzwei 14]

The winner will be named when the results are in.

[Operator 1,927]

I'll say it again, get on a plane and go talk to your wife. You could be dealing with a face issue and from what it sounds like you don't know her very well and therefore don't know what the problem is. GO TALK TO HER!!!!

I'm sorry to tell everyone but the money means nothing, it's common. Take a poll in the China forum and I venture that more than half of us (men) paid something to our in-laws when we got married. My Chinese friends have done the same thing, a simple Google search for Bride Price can put everyone"s mind at ease. I doubt she bothered to get married to scam this guy out of 2K and an iPhone.

http://www.ibtimes.com/price-happily-ever-after-negotiating-marriage-modern-china-1214183

http://www.mercatornet.com/demography/view/12322

Edited February 15, 2014 by Operator

[Lenzwei 14]

I cannot tell you how much I hope you're right. My Chinese visa expired February 6th.

I asked her friend that will see her tomorrow to ask her if she will speak to me if I travel to her. But before I can go, I have to buy the airline tickets and apply for another visa. Which will take some time.

The thing is, if she doesn't want to see me, there is no point in traveling to China. Something else I just thought of, and I know this sounds bad, but I didn't go to her home. We stayed in hotel near where her friend lives. So really I don't know where she lives. Did I just fall off the turnip truck?

At the time it seemed reasonable. Now, not so much.

[Karee 4,189]

Not to be a jerk, but let's walk through this.

1. You married her, but never met her mother

2. She came to you with some sort of story needing money

3. She turned off her phone. More than likely not off, but a different SIM card inside

There's more but I don't feel like backtracking in this thread. Now if someone came to you with the above 3 things, what would be your advice to them? There's your answer.

[Operator 1,927]

Where is your wife from?

Does she have a university degree?

What's her job?

[Lenzwei 14]

You are correct. BUT, I did meet her sister, to get the visa I needed her ID card , I have a copy of her passport, divorce certificate, and our marriage certificate. Also all of the information contained I the I-130.

One last aside. I didn't have some paperwork for the marriage and we were turned down at the marriage office, flew back to Guangzhou, flew back, got married, flew back again to Baiyun airport where I promptly left early the next morning.

No time to see her mother after, and couldn't stay with her before because we weren't married.

At this point I'm not sure if I'm even believing the story.

[Lenzwei 14]

She lives in Guangzhou now, she's from Nanning, originally. No degree, she works for her sister a a dye distribution center. Her sister imports dye from Hong Kong and then ships it to local dress manufacturers.

She works in the storehouse.

Her father died when she was fourteen, and she went to work to support the family. It lines up with was what was on her biographic information. I know it sounds like the perfect hard luck story and maybe it is just a story.

[Operator 1,927]

Well if she scammed you I guess you should feel lucky that she only got you for $4400. Not very ambitious if you ask me.

[Karee 4,189]

Well if she scammed you I guess you should feel lucky that she only got you for $4400. Not very ambitious if you ask me.

That's what always surprised me about the Thai scammers. They were so short sighted. Not sure about China, but $4400 is a years salary for an average Thai.

[Operator 1,927]

That's what always surprised me about the Thai scammers. They were so short sighted. Not sure about China, but $4400 is a years salary for an average Thai.

I really don't think this was a scam but I'm no expert by a long shot.

If he really has a marriage certificate that's legal I doubt she would have put herself in that position for that kind of money. Chinese women have a wicked temper and if he has done something or she feels like he's not being a good husband it's possible she put him on hush mode.

Married at the first meeting and not meeting Mom, big red flag. I don't think he's been back since they got married, another big red flag, most Chinese women wouldn't have it.

I don't smell a scam but i also bet on the Broncos.

BTW we had a wicked time in Bangkok last week! Ate like pigs, shopped like tourists and partied like rock stars.

[Lenzwei 14]

What the thoughts on the ID card and passport information? Would she be that brazen?