"Excessive politeness and formality at the interview"

[AKSinghSingh79 143]

I find it interesting to hear that many people on this site, especially from Indian consulate filers that excessive politeness and/or formality at the interview is not advised.

What I mean by excessive politeness/formality is referring to the CO after every sentence as Sir or Madam. For instance when answering a question, "Yes sir, well when I was......and then well you see sir"....etc and so on.

Why is this an issue? The only reason I can think of why it is an issue is because it may show desperation to come to the U.S. Otherwise I can't understand why being formal and/or polite should be an issue.

Anyone else have any opinions on this?

[SuperDuper! 230]

Just be real and natural, not nervous, brown-nosing and phony. After all, your interviewer is human, too. Overly formal, stiff and awkward just looks suspicious and disingenuous.

When in doubt, just tell it like it is. Good luck!

[Bec_Dipu 103]

The only advice I've ever read regarding formality with the Indian embassies is in regards to lying in response to any questions that are of a very personal nature. If they ask a question you find intrusive, either answer it honestly or decline to comment with the understanding that it could be held against you, but DON'T lie for modesty's sake.

As far as US manners go (not that they seem to be practiced much here anymore), don't expect the concept of a line and first come, first serve to be enforced or even embraced. You also shouldn't expect young people to give up their seat to the elderly, infirm or pregnant. I also noticed that while many people are perfectly capable of understanding the verbal and printed instructions, they will still try to sneak in under the guise that they just didn't understand that when the 8:30 appointments were called, that didn't include the 10:00 appointments.

Being polite can never hurt you but like all things, please, thank you and sir/ma'am lose their appeal if not used in moderation. No one likes to feel like he or she is being cajoled.

[TBoneTX 48,362]

During law-enforcement interviews of suspects, stiffness and formality can be viewed as a sign that something is causing tension. Be as conversational as possible while speaking, using contractions whenever possible (can't, won't, I'll, he'd, she's) instead of full words (cannot, will not, I will, he would, she is).

[sachinky 465]

There is a difference between being polite and formal ("Good morning, how are you?") and sucking up like there's no tomorrow.

Your average Indian at the US embassy is probably too busy sh!ttin' his pants all the while worrying about his/her limited English language skills to notice the subtle but very real line between the two. This can often lead to the applicant being perceived as over-eager or 'trying too hard to please.' This has been my experience from the three times I have inside the U.S. Embassy and many times the applicants come off looking like they are grovelling. I say stick to a casual, conversational tone. It's like a job interview. Dress well, speak succinctly, be articulate in your responses, don't shuffle too much or look nervous. I know, easier said than done but you want the job, you want the visa. You know it, the consulate officer knows it.

Nonchalance works best, I'd venture to guess. I remember my F-1 interview, I walked in with the attitude, "if I get this student visa, great, I'll be studying in the US in the fall, if not, hey, I already have two of the best universities in India as a back-up." Both of which, I'd already applied and been admitted to. Admittedly, I was MUCH more nervous during my CR-1.

Edited October 28, 2011 by sachinky