Herpes--waiver?

[onequestion 0]

Hi everyone.

I just found out my partner gave me genital herpes unknowingly. On the list of unpermissable diseases herpes is on there, but not listed as one of the 9. (It's like "like herpes" to describe another one.) Do they test for that at the medical (like a blood test)? He never had any symptoms so he just carries it. They wouldn't be able to see it on him or diagnose any way other than blood.

Now that my life is over and I am a leper, is the government going to try to take away my love too? I am the petitioner.

The real question is, could my life get any worse

[robhankins 0]

Hi everyone.

I just found out my partner gave me genital herpes unknowingly. On the list of unpermissable diseases herpes is on there, but not listed as one of the 9. (It's like "like herpes" to describe another one.) Do they test for that at the medical (like a blood test)? He never had any symptoms so he just carries it. They wouldn't be able to see it on him or diagnose any way other than blood.

Now that my life is over and I am a leper, is the government going to try to take away my love too? I am the petitioner.

The real question is, could my life get any worse

You are not a leper and your life is not over. Just get a prescription for Valtrex 500mg. Half the US population has it too. Just be sure to take the Valtrex for a week before the interview and don't disclose it. They can't tell it on a blood test. Relax, everything is cool.

[onequestion 0]

But that's how I found out about myself. They did a blood test. I only had symptoms once and it was really really mild. I was curious. They can even tell which type you have now. They gave me a new thing called Famvir which you take for 1 day if you think you'll have an outbreak (how do you know??). I don't know if you can take it to prevent an outbreak.

[qqq777iii888 0]

But that's how I found out about myself. They did a blood test. I only had symptoms once and it was really really mild. I was curious. They can even tell which type you have now. They gave me a new thing called Famvir which you take for 1 day if you think you'll have an outbreak (how do you know??). I don't know if you can take it to prevent an outbreak.

same thing happened to me. No outbreaks got a blood test that was positive and that was 2 years ago never another out break. Also you never know your partner may not have given it to you either. It could have been a long time ago. Because of the new blood test for herpes a ton of people have it that dont even know they do. It is no big deal that you have it, be glad you dont have aids. Your interview should do fine, ask others about that. If your partner has it too then all the better.

[Michele&Omer 0]

But that's how I found out about myself. They did a blood test. I only had symptoms once and it was really really mild. I was curious. They can even tell which type you have now. They gave me a new thing called Famvir which you take for 1 day if you think you'll have an outbreak (how do you know??). I don't know if you can take it to prevent an outbreak.

same thing happened to me. No outbreaks got a blood test that was positive and that was 2 years ago never another out break. Also you never know your partner may not have given it to you either. It could have been a long time ago. Because of the new blood test for herpes a ton of people have it that dont even know they do. It is no big deal that you have it, be glad you dont have aids. Your interview should do fine, ask others about that. If your partner has it too then all the better.

I work in a hosptial laboratory and yes they can test for it and they can tell if it is type I or type II herpes.

Whether or not they routinely test for it will the medical exam with the Civil Surgeon, I do not know.

Generally, though it is not a test that is usually asked for in most routine physicals.

Good Luck,

Michele

[Lizzy 0]

Im sorry to hear about this.

At my medical in London, they checked *downthere*, i think the only way they can tell at the time would be if you had an outbreak at the time of the medical , althrough im not sure.

I would say in the medical you've got this. The doctor said to me when i mentioned my depression that, if he had found out i had lied he would written up the report in a way that would not of looked good.

Good luck.

Edited September 2, 2006 by Lizzy

[onequestion 0]

I would say in the medical you've got this. The doctor said to me when i mentioned my depression that, if he had found out i had lied he would written up the report in a way that would not of looked good.

Good luck.

Well, it's my guy who has to get examined (I'm the American). He has to go to the urologist soon to get all checked out. He says in his country medical records are not maintained like they are in the US. How could they find out he lied? All there would be in terms of a paper trail would be a blood test.

I don't want him to LIE, but since I just learned that 25% of people have Herpes and only 10% of those people even know, he could just claim ignorance, right?

[KarenCee 3]

Where is your guy from? It's never a good thing to "lie" when it comes to this visa process. Claiming ignorance is the same as lying, since he already knows he has it. Depends on where he has his medical, what consulate, that sort of thing..and if they do blood tests, I would imagine it depends on how extensive they are - blood tests, as I'm sure you know, don't lie. I'm so sorry this is going on in your lives right now, and I hope things do work out for you.

[Lizzy 0]

Well, it's my guy who has to get examined (I'm the American). He has to go to the urologist soon to get all checked out. He says in his country medical records are not maintained like they are in the US. How could they find out he lied? All there would be in terms of a paper trail would be a blood test.

I don't want him to LIE, but since I just learned that 25% of people have Herpes and only 10% of those people even know, he could just claim ignorance, right?

They check guys to. They may, may not find out he lied BUT does he want that on his mind, when he goes through AOS etc?

I just get a bit upset when people claim ignorance as i went through hell with getting doctors letters etc because i told the truth at the medical about my illness, but hey at least im here, legally and dont need to worry about any lies being found out later.

Which embassy is he being interviewed at?

[onequestion 0]

Well, it's my guy who has to get examined (I'm the American). He has to go to the urologist soon to get all checked out. He says in his country medical records are not maintained like they are in the US. How could they find out he lied? All there would be in terms of a paper trail would be a blood test.

I don't want him to LIE, but since I just learned that 25% of people have Herpes and only 10% of those people even know, he could just claim ignorance, right?

They check guys to. They may, may not find out he lied BUT does he want that on his mind, when he goes through AOS etc?

I just get a bit upset when people claim ignorance as i went through hell with getting doctors letters etc because i told the truth at the medical about my illness, but hey at least im here, legally and dont need to worry about any lies being found out later.

Which embassy is he being interviewed at?

Oh Lizzy I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say I wanted to skip a step you've had to go through. That must have sounded like "Can I just get married on the VWP and skip the K1?"

I am pretty sure I got it from him because I didn't have it BEFORE him. I am a hypochondriac STD tester. BUT he has never had a symptom and his test is scheduled for Sept 14. So technically, he does not know that he has it. Even if I'd given it to him it would be highly unlikely that he hadn't contracted it. But maybe he should just wait til he gets through AOS to get a test?

He said on the offchance he doesn't have it he's not really concerned about getting it since we're getting married, so I guess his safety is not that much of an issue.

The embassy he's going through I sort of don't want to disclose, so I'll have to go without specific info (although it's not in London). His embassy is not that popular on VJ and I created this account for just this purpose.

[TracyTN 237]

What Lizzy is saying is true - if he's not having an outbreak during the medical, that's fine.

But I think what you're asking, onequestion, is what happens if the blood work reveals it? I don't *think* it would cause any problems but I'd prefer someone to come along here and be able to say for sure.

Oh and, to the title of your thread - your life is not over. As has been mentioned, this is a VERY common STD and most often, people who have it get one outbreak and then never another in their lives (esp. with the meds that are available now). I have a friend who has it and she only ever had the initial outbreak - and she does not take valtrex or anything to keep them at bay. I know it has a 'stimga' associated with it, but when you look at how common it is now, I think that stigma is waning.

Edited September 2, 2006 by TracyTN

[onequestion 0]

What Lizzy is saying is true - if he's not having an outbreak during the medical, that's fine.

But I think what you're asking, onequestion, is what happens if the blood work reveals it? I don't *think* it would cause any problems but I'd prefer someone to come along here and be able to say for sure.

Yeah, I'm looking for that info.

I mean, with other STDs, they send you home and give you meds and make you come back til it's all cleared up. Unless it's HIV in which case you need a waiver.

Where does that leave herpes? It's not cureable. It's also not life-threatening. I dunno.

Oh and, to the title of your thread - your life is not over. As has been mentioned, this is a VERY common STD and most often, people who have it get one outbreak and then never another in their lives (esp. with the meds that are available now). I have a friend who has it and she only ever had the initial outbreak - and she does not take valtrex or anything to keep them at bay. I know it has a 'stimga' associated with it, but when you look at how common it is now, I think that stigma is waning.

Thank you. I told my mother because I was really desperate for some support (other than from my fiance, who I believe is legally required to be supportive). She told me my aunt has it, her best friend has it, which has helped. But every day since I've found out (five now), I wake up with the thought that this is going to be forever. The average amount of outbreaks is 4-5/year too! I keep thinking of more and more cultural references to Herpes and how disgusting it is portrayed to be in the media. If things ever end with my fiance, I don't think I'd ever date again... bleh.

[travlnmannn 0]

What happened to getting tested before you have sex with someone without some kind of protection. I'm sorry OneQuestion but I have no sympathy for you or your fiance. And then to consider not disclosing this as well. No wonder the process takes so long. Look at what people do to try and hide things.

If you were such a hypochondriac about getting tested for STD's then why didnt you just use a condom and save the money on the testing. Condoms cheaper than a test.

[onequestion 0]

What happened to getting tested before you have sex with someone without some kind of protection. I'm sorry OneQuestion but I have no sympathy for you or your fiance. And then to consider not disclosing this as well. No wonder the process takes so long. Look at what people do to try and hide things.

If you were such a hypochondriac about getting tested for STD's then why didnt you just use a condom and save the money on the testing. Condoms cheaper than a test.

Guess what, you can get Herpes while using a condom. Did you sleep through sex ed?

I always practice safer sex, and they won't test you for Herpes in most places unless you have symptoms (Planned Parenthood, for instance) because the knowledge that you carry the virus is not always useful to people. So people who fully "check out" after an STD test probably have no idea what their Herpes status is.

A$$hole.

edited to add: who does it hurt to not disclose this, especially as we currently have no proof? There's nothing that can be done about it. We're not trying to bring him here so he can spread it all over the country.

Edited September 2, 2006 by onequestion

[KarenCee 3]

who does it hurt to not disclose this, especially as we currently have no proof? There's nothing that can be done about it. We're not trying to bring him here so he can spread it all over the country.

No one is saying he will come here and spread it all over the country. I think the issue is knowing you have something and not disclosing it, making it sound as if you plan to hide it. Anytime someone posts something like this, that's the first thing to come to mind. Please don't take this as an accusation...it is certainly not meant to be this way. Depending on where your fiancé has his medical might be the determining factor too. I dunno, I just think being upfront and honest is the best policy when dealing with the USCIS. Just MHO of course.