Happy stories of American women +Moroccan husbands

[kristen_maroc 126]

Hey y'all,

There seems to be a lot of fraud, based on some of the topics lately. Those of you who have been in a longer-term marriage, please post your stories?! I need a pick me up and some cheerleading... this process is hard and to keep reading over and over again about things that have not worked out is just demoralizing.

[tany1157 161]

Hey y'all,

There seems to be a lot of fraud, based on some of the topics lately. Those of you who have been in a longer-term marriage, please post your stories?! I need a pick me up and some cheerleading... this process is hard and to keep reading over and over again about things that have not worked out is just demoralizing.

AGREED! :thumbs:

[kristen_maroc 126]

AGREED! :thumbs:

Tany! I have a friend who married her Moroccan husband literally, 6 or 7 days after you last year. She's gone through a lot of what you have, looking at your timeline. Good luck!

Edited March 1, 2011 by k in morocco

[tany1157 161]

Tany! I have a friend who married her Moroccan husband literally, 6 or 7 days after you last year. She's gone through a lot of what you have, looking at your timeline. Good luck!

Thanks a lot! We are pretty darn optimistic this time around. Where are you in the process?

[kristen_maroc 126]

Thanks a lot! We are pretty darn optimistic this time around. Where are you in the process?

Engaged, sent off I-129F, waiting. Waiting. Waiting.

It's okay though. It's worth it.

[msheesha 548]

Engaged, sent off I-129F, waiting. Waiting. Waiting.

It's okay though. It's worth it.

Did you do direct consular filing? Seems like you've been living in Morocco for 4 years, and would qualify for DCF. I think those cases usually go more quickly than others.

[Gugusitolindo 32]

hmmm, not alot of American with Moroccan wanna tell their stories......start a topic of negativity and you can have 7 pages in an hour.

guess not alot of good stories out there!! or perhaps.....they are too happy to write in this forum - as a previous VJer wrote.

[Jenn! 918]

I guess we are somewhat of a success story, although Wadi doesn't have his citizenship yet, so the verdict is still out. I kid, I kid.

Anyway, we met almost 8 years ago now - we were both living in Genoa, Italy. We dated "traditionally" I guess, and then lived with each other for a while there as well. We went through the K1 process back in 2005 and have been married for over 5 years. Had our first child in 2009.

Right now, things are good, but it hasn't always been smooth sailing. We are a lot more different due to our upbringings than I realized when we were all wrapped up in the romance. It hasn't been anything insurmountable, but I would say that intercultural marriages are much more challenging overall. I think that when we met we were both already compromising in a way by living in Italy - more fast-paced than Morocco, more laid-back than the U.S. Moving to the U.S. was my comfort zone, and Wadi had to be the one to stretch. It's an ongoing process.

Now we have the greatest thing in common, our love for our child, that helps bridge our divides and makes us work extra hard to understand where the other is coming from. We're making a life here together - my career is going well, his business is starting to take off, we're thinking about when we'd like to add to our family. All in all, things are pretty good, and I wish the same for all of you.

[Jenn! 918]

Oh, and I should add that I really hate posts that sound like gushing or bragging, it's just not my style. So that was hard for me to write, even with all of the quaIifications on my happiness. If others are like me, that might be one reason why you don't see a lot of "happy stories" around here.

[msheesha 548]

Don't know that I can qualify yet.

We've been in a relationship for 3 years; married for two; he's been here under a year.

I think we're normal as any two people in this situation can be. We both started in the process a little older than most seem to have started. He was right around 40, and I'm a few years younger than he is. He had a comfortable life in Morocco, and I had a comfortable life here, and now we're trying to build a comfortable life together.

It takes patience, and compromise.

There are great moments & moments where I think, oh my gosh, I'm such a mean b$tch I don't know how he stands me or oh my gosh, he's such a pain, how do I stand him!?!?. But there's that in any marriage, and as I posted somewhere else, I think the biggest downfalls in a lot of marriages are not recognizing before hand how much effort needs to be put in. As Jenn said, the cultural differences increase the amount of effort needed.

So, are we happy? Pretty much, yes.

Are there moments I fantasize about single life? Yup

Are there moments he wants to be on the first plane to Morocco and away from me? Yup.

Is that normal? Yup.

So, that's our story in a nutshell. Happy for the most part, and putting the work in to be happy more often than not!

Thanks for the good wishes for everyone Jenn. It was nice to read your post.

Edited March 1, 2011 by msheesha

[aminah 6]

In June my husband and I will celebrate our 5th wedding Anniversary. He's only been in the US with me a little over 3 yrs though. We spent 6 mos in AP. Anyway, we've had our ups and downs too. Sometimes it seems to be a cultural misunderstanding and sometimes it's not. My children from my previous marriage were 18, 13 and 12 when he arrived. He doesn't have any children and had never been married. Often I have to remind myself that he's a long way from home living with a ready made family that don't always understand his ways. All in all I think he's adapted quite well.

[aminah 6]

Oh, and I should add that I really hate posts that sound like gushing or bragging, it's just not my style. So that was hard for me to write, even with all of the quaIifications on my happiness. If others are like me, that might be one reason why you don't see a lot of "happy stories" around here.

I'm like this too. Jenn......your post didn't sound like you were bragging, it sounded very honest.

[New Beginnings 32]

My husband and I have been married for almost 3 1/2 years now. He's been here for almost 2 years. I would say that we are a success. I love my life with my husband even through the hard times. I believe we compliment each other very nicely and even with different cultures we try to keep our marriage first above anything else. Because of the time we spent apart physically we were able to grow our communication skills. I feel that communication is one of our best qualities.

[MrsAmera 41]

Although I have been in the "fraud" posts my story is a happy one. We have been together for 6 years married for 5. We met in Marrakech when I was on vacation with my dad and sister. After a year of visits and processing our visa was granted. The first 2 years were probably the hardest of my life, with a lot of adjustments on both of our parts. Some were cultural, some were oldest child/youngest child dynamics (me being an oldest child, him being the baby of 9!) Things are looking up now as I am making a go of my career and he's finally at a point where he has made the US home and isn't always holding on to moving back to Morocco (and holding back in life here). Certainly he gave up seeing his family all the time to move here, but we have both come to realize that we have BOTH given up a lot for each other and worked towards making a life together instead of focusing on what we've lost in the process. Those months of waiting were hard but life together is a lot harder in many ways. I love him dearly and am happy that we pulled through the really rough times but God forbid something ever happened to him I would never go through this process again!

[msheesha 548]

Although I have been in the "fraud" posts my story is a happy one. We have been together for 6 years married for 5. We met in Marrakech when I was on vacation with my dad and sister. After a year of visits and processing our visa was granted. The first 2 years were probably the hardest of my life, with a lot of adjustments on both of our parts. Some were cultural, some were oldest child/youngest child dynamics (me being an oldest child, him being the baby of 9!) Things are looking up now as I am making a go of my career and he's finally at a point where he has made the US home and isn't always holding on to moving back to Morocco (and holding back in life here). Certainly he gave up seeing his family all the time to move here, but we have both come to realize that we have BOTH given up a lot for each other and worked towards making a life together instead of focusing on what we've lost in the process. Those months of waiting were hard but life together is a lot harder in many ways. I love him dearly and am happy that we pulled through the really rough times but God forbid something ever happened to him I would never go through this process again!

I think I should get advice from you - he's the oldest, and I'm the youngest of a large family!