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Dogwood_Poet

Funeral traditons

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Just a quick question about funeral traditions in the Philippines, my wife lives in Northern Mindanao and her father just passed away with lung cancer. She was able to get there before he passed and they were able to visit a few days. (I think he was just waiting for her to get home) They had the funeral last Sunday and I had a couple of questions.

Of course they had to have a lot of food for everyone coming by to see papa while he was in state. (different from where I am from in rural Kentucky where everyone brings food for the family)

Kathlene said they are supposed to have a meal 9 or 10 days after the funeral and again 40 days after. I did not ask her a lot about it because she is still upset about the loss of her papa, so I thought I would ask here about the traditions.

Honestly, I think the respect and traditions they have in the Philippines are great and I like the respect they show for the dead.


Ako gugma ko GWAPA asawa Kathlene!

(I love my BEAUTIFUL wife Kathlene!)

_________

"A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing."

George Bernard Shaw

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Just a quick question about funeral traditions in the Philippines, my wife lives in Northern Mindanao and her father just passed away with lung cancer. She was able to get there before he passed and they were able to visit a few days. (I think he was just waiting for her to get home) They had the funeral last Sunday and I had a couple of questions.

Of course they had to have a lot of food for everyone coming by to see papa while he was in state. (different from where I am from in rural Kentucky where everyone brings food for the family)

Kathlene said they are supposed to have a meal 9 or 10 days after the funeral and again 40 days after. I did not ask her a lot about it because she is still upset about the loss of her papa, so I thought I would ask here about the traditions.

Honestly, I think the respect and traditions they have in the Philippines are great and I like the respect they show for the dead.

yup it's normal. plus be prepared to pony up to feed everyone again on the 1st death anniversary.


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Respect for the dead can be stretch.

The rent apartments (little Tombs in a concrete wall) and keep them thier for about a year (if they don't have a place to bury/entern them)., If the family don't pay the yearly rent they pull out the casket and throw it in the middle of the graveyard, and put the bones in a bone scrap pile

Family buys the food for the wake, and it's bad luck to take the food home cuz it brings death/bad luck with the person who brings the food home.

They don't believe in cremation, which would be perfect for that crowded part of the world.

I remember when I was a kid, they would bring the casket back to the house before the funeral, now of days they keep them at the funeral home.


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They keep the body in the funeral home IF you have the money. When my father in law died he was in the house (embalmed and in a casket) until we arrived and then up to the day of the funeral. People there 24 hours a day and the body is never left alone. It was like a family reunion. I also attended a funeral that the body was kept at the funeral home and there was a bedroom attached to each chapel so the body was never left alone.

Yep, pony up for the 40 days and then the annual "death anniversery" plus they all gather at the cemetary on November 1st for all souls day.

Interesting that when all of the relatives/neighbors gather for food/conversation/eating/card playing that some of the pot/winnings from each hand went into a jar to help with the costs.

There was also a couple of guys who traveled around the city and set up food stands at the homes of the deceased.

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Filed: Other Country: Philippines
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They keep the body in the funeral home IF you have the money. When my father in law died he was in the house (embalmed and in a casket) until we arrived and then up to the day of the funeral. People there 24 hours a day and the body is never left alone. It was like a family reunion. I also attended a funeral that the body was kept at the funeral home and there was a bedroom attached to each chapel so the body was never left alone.

Yep, pony up for the 40 days and then the annual "death anniversery" plus they all gather at the cemetary on November 1st for all souls day.

Interesting that when all of the relatives/neighbors gather for food/conversation/eating/card playing that some of the pot/winnings from each hand went into a jar to help with the costs.

There was also a couple of guys who traveled around the city and set up food stands at the homes of the deceased.

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Just a quick question about funeral traditions in the Philippines, my wife lives in Northern Mindanao and her father just passed away with lung cancer. She was able to get there before he passed and they were able to visit a few days. (I think he was just waiting for her to get home) They had the funeral last Sunday and I had a couple of questions.

Of course they had to have a lot of food for everyone coming by to see papa while he was in state. (different from where I am from in rural Kentucky where everyone brings food for the family)

Kathlene said they are supposed to have a meal 9 or 10 days after the funeral and again 40 days after. I did not ask her a lot about it because she is still upset about the loss of her papa, so I thought I would ask here about the traditions.

Honestly, I think the respect and traditions they have in the Philippines are great and I like the respect they show for the dead.

My condolences to her family first of all. A tradition is a tradition and that 's our way of showing respect to the loved ones who passed away. The meal after 9 days and 40 days are very important for us but it DOES NOT mean we have to feed the whole barangay. It could be a lunch for the whole immediate family and friends but if u do not have money to feed the whole barangay then u don't have to.

The 1st Death Anniversarry doesnt mean a party. It could be a private get together (lunch) for just the family but u know how it works there,,people invited invites other people too so i think ur wife just wants to prepare for this case.But as what i have said earlier,,u don't have to spend a lot of money for that as it is not a mandatory party.

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Thanks for the condolences and the information. Yes, they kept papa in the house, Kathlene even showed him to me on chat. I remember my grandmother telling me about keeping the body at home back in the day.

No problem about the meals, but was just wanting to know more about the traditions.


Ako gugma ko GWAPA asawa Kathlene!

(I love my BEAUTIFUL wife Kathlene!)

_________

"A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing."

George Bernard Shaw

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Interesting that when all of the relatives/neighbors gather for food/conversation/eating/card playing that some of the pot/winnings from each hand went into a jar to help with the costs.

yeah that's called a "tong". you are correct...the family does use it towards the cost of the funeral. mostly for the food, drinks/coffee, snacks they feed to the people during the wake. and the family is supposed to use the tongs they get during the wake for nothing else except for the cost of the funeral...whatever it may be. it is bad luck to keep the money and spend it for yourself.


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