credit card debts

[Mr.&Mrs.A 0]

my credit score will be affected too? even though all of his credit cards are under his name? and he has huge debts even before we got married. We are only married for 9 months.

I am not really bothered by my credit score as i never had any credit cards. So i don't have a credit score? and if its gonna be affected then i'd be in a shithole... coz no credit score plus bad credit history caused by my husband.

I dont really know how it works.

Your credit score would be affected if you piggyback on his credit card. You should apply your own credit card.

I am planning to get a secured credit card in the future because nobody would want to give me credit right now. I don't know if its a good idea but i heard its the only thing you can do to build credit score.

Its obvious that all the financial difficulties your husband is experiencing is really stressing you out and understandably so. You are getting good advice from some of the people here on VJ. It appears there is very little you can personally do to correct things. Know this though, you are not alone, there is an economic crisis in the US right now and literally millions of people are in the same situation. Credit Card Company's have the highest rate of defaults in history and now the Gov't is clamping down on how they do business. More people then ever before are filing bankruptcy, most because they have no other choice. If in fact he has defaulted they will call religiously for about 6 months then they will right it off as a bad debt. They report this right off to the IRS which will declare it income and you will have to pay taxes on it unless he can prove he was insolvent (broke) at the time he defaulted. (not always hard to do in most cases). Know this! Credit card company's will settle the debt for less then half of what he owes and sometimes even less then that. Because of so many defaults they are desperate to settle. Convince him to cut expenses down to the bare essentials only! No matter what he has to give up he is still rich as long as he has you, right! Family is everything, at least it is to me, my wife is priceless. It sounds like he is fortunate to have you. Hang in there, pray for guidance and all will work out, I'm sure.

[SnME 3]

Do like a friend did. Get as many cards as you can, max them out and go bankrupt!

Lots do so but it sucks as it affects straight shooters big time.

Is this really a responsible thing to be promoting here??

That's so irresponsible thing to do..

Besides being possible fraud (something you can go to jail for) - the bankruptcy laws changed a few years ago and have provisions in place for folks doing just this type of thing... a big no-no..

MANY states still have the old school laws on the books. Your 'thoroughbred racing horse' would be exempt from the creditors if you did it right...

They CANT take your horse in 'some' states...

Most all of those laws dont specify how much your 'horse' can be worth...

Just getting 'Credit Counseling' from most agencies WILL show up on your credit report also. This is fact and it is NOT good for a high score. Buy a BOOK instead if you are concerned about your overall FICO score.

If you try and manage to work out a deal with the individual credit card companies on your own to avoid this 'mark' you are still screwed if they write off any of the debt because they will send you a 1099 at the end of the year and then you get to pay taxes on the money that you beat them out of with your 'deal'...

They write it off as a 'loss' and YOU get to pay the taxes on the money...

If you play with snakes... They WILL bite you. You can 'try' to be a meaner or smarter snake but then you are a snake just like them... It is WAY easier to live beneath your means and save. Prices tend to drop when a wise buyer pulls out a pile of CASH for the deal.

[betsay 0]

my credit score will be affected too? even though all of his credit cards are under his name? and he has huge debts even before we got married. We are only married for 9 months.

I am not really bothered by my credit score as i never had any credit cards. So i don't have a credit score? and if its gonna be affected then i'd be in a shithole... coz no credit score plus bad credit history caused by my husband.

I dont really know how it works.

No credit is better than bad credit. I don't have credit card either. Husband and I are using his credit card which is in his name. I am not bothered anyway. I use cash when making any purchase.

Back in the Philippines, I used to have 4 credit cards. Some of the things I charged were legitimate charges like hospital bills, major repairs, food, etc. But looking back, most of it were just things that I could do without. I was working and I always told myself that I deserved it since I worked my butt off anyway, AND I could pay it all off someday. Meanwhile, I was paying the ridiculous interest every month (esp. on my Citibank visa) since I paid only the minimum. Payday was always stressful for me since I had to figure out what goes where, and how to make the money last through the next payday . How I wished I could be DEBT FREE and have that peace and freedom!! At last, peace and freedom was gained when I resigned from my job, got my "retirement" pay, paid off all my "utangs" (debts), and moved here.

When I first moved here, I used to find it weird that my husband and my parents-in-law would not buy ANYTHING that are not on sale. In fact I used to get irritated when we I can't buy the item (which we can afford to buy anyway) just because it's not on sale yet. I also used to be embarrassed when we had to use coupons everytime we eat out, hehe. Now, I have come to appreciate the fact that my husband is a cheapskate on somethings:) He taught me a lot how to handle money, and how to be a good steward.

I still have credit cards over here, the only difference is, I don't use it a lot, and we pay it all off every month. We also don't have cable TV, no netflix (we just download movies from the internet for free), no cellphone, and mostly go to thrift stores and garage sales. You wouldn't believe the "treasures" you can find in those stores and sales for less money. I also do my husband's hair, do my own nails, don't have facials every month anymore, no monthly massage either- gosh how I miss being pampered like that. I figure I can pamper myself when we go back Pinas na lang. With the money we don't spend on luxuries, we are able to go out to dinner every week, save, and send our monthly support Philippines to help with my Mom's medicines and household expenses.

I guess it's a choice of what lifestyle you want to have, and the priorities in life you want make.

[Armenia 18]

Hmmn, credit cards are obviously getting a very bad rap on this thread.

I like using credit cards and their "badness" or "goodness" depends on the person using it.

The problem is, a lot of people view a credit card as an unlimited source of funds. When I use a CC, I know exactly how much I make in a year, how much I have in the bank, and how much I should be spending per month for each expense category (food, toiletries, medicines, clothes, etc.). I could always pay by cash but I find using a CC very advantageous. I use my CCs to pay for everything, even if it's less than $5. I gets points/cash back for every dollar I spend! Who else would pay me just for buying groceries or paying my tuition?

I pay my balance in full every month. I've never paid interest on any CC purchase. I've only had two fraudulent transactions in my lifetime and they were immediately cancelled by the CC company after I called in. I know a few people who had fradulent transaction on their bill but noticed them too late or were not sure if they were fraudulent or not. (They never called the CC company). I do not miss suspicious transaction entries because, at the end of the month, I always check the bill entries against my receipts. It's like doing my personal monthly auditing.

The problem is humans who cannot manage themselves. They take out CCs to pay other CCs. They buy appliances/etc. that their salaries cannot pay for. I just don't get that. How can you not know how much you can afford just because you are holding a piece of plastic in your hand? For those who are used to relying on CCs, think about your annual interest rate whenever you use your CC. Is that something you're buying worth paying 15-18% interest for?

Then again, some people don't really know how to use a CC. When I was still in PH, I had a friend who needed money and called me because I have a CC. She wanted me to w/draw money from my CC for her. I said, "are you crazy? Don't you know a CC withdrawal is a "cash advance" and I will have to pay interest starting the day I withdraw the money? Where do you think the money is going to come from eventually? You want me to go into debt for you?"

Edited September 1, 2009 by Armenia

[rheanick 42]

Hmmn, credit cards are obviously getting a very bad rap on this thread.

I like using credit cards and their "badness" or "goodness" depends on the person using it.

The problem is, a lot of people view a credit card as an unlimited source of funds. When I use a CC, I know exactly how much I make in a year, how much I have in the bank, and how much I should be spending per month for each expense category (food, toiletries, medicines, clothes, etc.). I could always pay by cash but I find using a CC very advantageous. I use my CCs to pay for everything, even if it's less than $5. I gets points/cash back for every dollar I spend! Who else would pay me just for buying groceries or paying my tuition?

I pay my balance in full every month. I've never paid interest on any CC purchase. I've only had two fraudulent transactions in my lifetime and they were immediately cancelled by the CC company after I called in. I know a few people who had fradulent transaction on their bill but noticed them too late or were not sure if they were fraudulent or not. (They never called the CC company). I do not miss suspicious transaction entries because, at the end of the month, I always check the bill entries against my receipts. It's like doing my personal monthly auditing.

The problem is humans who cannot manage themselves. They take out CCs to pay other CCs. They buy appliances/etc. that their salaries cannot pay for. I just don't get that. How can you not know how much you can afford just because you are holding a piece of plastic in your hand? For those who are used to relying on CCs, think about your annual interest rate whenever you use your CC. Is that something you're buying worth paying 15-18% interest for?

Then again, some people don't really know how to use a CC. When I was still in PH, I had a friend who needed money and called me because I have a CC. She wanted me to w/draw money from my CC for her. I said, "are you crazy? Don't you know a CC withdrawal is a "cash advance" and I will have to pay interest starting the day I withdraw the money? Where do you think the money is going to come from eventually? You want me to go into debt for you?"

I agree with your post.

Other may shoot me with this comment. I am not bothered with the % APR. I dont care how high it is coz I pay my debt on time. If you pay it on time, why do i have to be afraid of % APR.

Having a credit card is not bad. The person who has credit card should be responsible enough to know the rules in handling it.

[XR600SM 0]

Yeah....I've actually made money with some of my credit cards, and one of them will be flying me to the Philippines next time off of the airmiles.

I have never paid any interest at all though on any of them.

[rheanick 42]

Melissa,

If you have Bank of America account, you could subscribe in their SourcePoint Newsletter. Its free. They have some basic discussion on handling finances.

[perfect 39]

I really feel for you because that was my situation when I moved here. Came to find out that my then to be husband hadn't told me even half the picture about his debts. I knew he was bad with money but had no idea the full extent of what he owed. House had two liens on it at the time and we got a letter about 2 weeks after I arrived in the US threatening forclosure for unpaid mortgage. Turns out he owed about $70000 in various debts including credit cards, unpaid accounts, taxes - you name it - he had it. Many accounts had already gone to collections. Basically whenever he got mail he left it unopened and he didn't answer the house phone at all - knowing it would be people chasing him for money. His credit score at that time was 485.

So...here is what I did. I made him give me all his cards. I sat and opened one trash bag full of old mail to see what was really going on and dealt with it all myself - and I mean all by myself! He gets $20 allowance every alternate day and has one credit card with only $400 limit so he can't do much damage. I save coupons and look online for savings, only buy things in sales and cut out all unnecessary expenses (such as not taking the toll road to work - we live in Southern California), only having basic amenities on TV and home phone.) Fortunately he has allowed me to take complete control and now we have paid off all his old debts and his credit score is almost 700 - in less than 5 years.

His brother however, who is the same way with money, still never looks at his mail, never answers his phone and has many accounts in collections - some of which have resulted in wage garnishments which he has no control over. He is and always will be in a desperate situation looking over his shoulder all the time. 50 and nothing to show for it. Can't own a home. Can't buy a car. Nothing...

My advice: take charge. Collection agents here are aggressive. Make sure they are abiding by the Fair Credit Act about when they can call you and how many times a day they can call you and if necessary let them know you will report them for harassment. http://www.ftc.gov/bcp/edu/pubs/consumer/credit/cre18.shtm

Most of the companies I dealt with did allow me to set up some kind of payment plan - see if they will be wiling to negotiate one for you. See if you can get your husband to give you his cards either for safekeeping or so you can destroy them and see if giving him a small allowance would work - this should also make him more conscious of what he is actually spending.

I really feel for you because it's a horrible situation to deal with but it can be done. You need to be strong be prepared to dig in for the long haul. I hope our success gives you hope!

[angela920 0]

I really feel for you because that was my situation when I moved here. Came to find out that my then to be husband hadn't told me even half the picture about his debts. I knew he was bad with money but had no idea the full extent of what he owed. House had two liens on it at the time and we got a letter about 2 weeks after I arrived in the US threatening forclosure for unpaid mortgage. Turns out he owed about $70000 in various debts including credit cards, unpaid accounts, taxes - you name it - he had it. Many accounts had already gone to collections. Basically whenever he got mail he left it unopened and he didn't answer the house phone at all - knowing it would be people chasing him for money. His credit score at that time was 485.

So...here is what I did. I made him give me all his cards. I sat and opened one trash bag full of old mail to see what was really going on and dealt with it all myself - and I mean all by myself! He gets $20 allowance every alternate day and has one credit card with only $400 limit so he can't do much damage. I save coupons and look online for savings, only buy things in sales and cut out all unnecessary expenses (such as not taking the toll road to work - we live in Southern California), only having basic amenities on TV and home phone.) Fortunately he has allowed me to take complete control and now we have paid off all his old debts and his credit score is almost 700 - in less than 5 years.

His brother however, who is the same way with money, still never looks at his mail, never answers his phone and has many accounts in collections - some of which have resulted in wage garnishments which he has no control over. He is and always will be in a desperate situation looking over his shoulder all the time. 50 and nothing to show for it. Can't own a home. Can't buy a car. Nothing...

My advice: take charge. Collection agents here are aggressive. Make sure they are abiding by the Fair Credit Act about when they can call you and how many times a day they can call you and if necessary let them know you will report them for harassment. http://www.ftc.gov/bcp/edu/pubs/consumer/credit/cre18.shtm

Most of the companies I dealt with did allow me to set up some kind of payment plan - see if they will be wiling to negotiate one for you. See if you can get your husband to give you his cards either for safekeeping or so you can destroy them and see if giving him a small allowance would work - this should also make him more conscious of what he is actually spending.

I really feel for you because it's a horrible situation to deal with but it can be done. You need to be strong be prepared to dig in for the long haul. I hope our success gives you hope!

Thank you for your reply.. well there is nothing really i can do about her daughter going to a private school. Some here even told me don't blame it on the kid.. which i am not. But its a big chunk of money $1000 monthly is enough to pay all of the those 4 cards he has for a year. I really don't know whats gonna happen. We also received a lot of calls but its from the bank not yet from the collection agencies.. soon it will be.

Our rent too is expensive we pay $1660 for 2 beds and bath and our lease wont be up til July 2010 so we are stuck til next year. We have cut off everything we can and leave the stuff we need for survival.. food and clothing. I have a little spare money on my own account but i am just afraid to pay his credit cards because what if they just take money from my account without my authorization because i am the wife? I am really confused right now.

Another concern, i wanna ask... In his Bank of America credit card. He put my name on it as an extention card. This is before we got married so my name there is my old last name. Is this gonna affect my credit score too? Is this considered as unsettled lien? I wanna apply for a secured credit because I am thinking at least one of us should have a good credit in the future.

He is still the main cardholder in the bank of america credit card, im just an extension. So i dont know if its gonna affect my credit score since it was on my old last name. Thats what im really worried about.

[Minya's wife 24]

I really feel for you because that was my situation when I moved here. Came to find out that my then to be husband hadn't told me even half the picture about his debts. I knew he was bad with money but had no idea the full extent of what he owed. House had two liens on it at the time and we got a letter about 2 weeks after I arrived in the US threatening forclosure for unpaid mortgage. Turns out he owed about $70000 in various debts including credit cards, unpaid accounts, taxes - you name it - he had it. Many accounts had already gone to collections. Basically whenever he got mail he left it unopened and he didn't answer the house phone at all - knowing it would be people chasing him for money. His credit score at that time was 485.

So...here is what I did. I made him give me all his cards. I sat and opened one trash bag full of old mail to see what was really going on and dealt with it all myself - and I mean all by myself! He gets $20 allowance every alternate day and has one credit card with only $400 limit so he can't do much damage. I save coupons and look online for savings, only buy things in sales and cut out all unnecessary expenses (such as not taking the toll road to work - we live in Southern California), only having basic amenities on TV and home phone.) Fortunately he has allowed me to take complete control and now we have paid off all his old debts and his credit score is almost 700 - in less than 5 years.

His brother however, who is the same way with money, still never looks at his mail, never answers his phone and has many accounts in collections - some of which have resulted in wage garnishments which he has no control over. He is and always will be in a desperate situation looking over his shoulder all the time. 50 and nothing to show for it. Can't own a home. Can't buy a car. Nothing...

My advice: take charge. Collection agents here are aggressive. Make sure they are abiding by the Fair Credit Act about when they can call you and how many times a day they can call you and if necessary let them know you will report them for harassment. http://www.ftc.gov/bcp/edu/pubs/consumer/credit/cre18.shtm

Most of the companies I dealt with did allow me to set up some kind of payment plan - see if they will be wiling to negotiate one for you. See if you can get your husband to give you his cards either for safekeeping or so you can destroy them and see if giving him a small allowance would work - this should also make him more conscious of what he is actually spending.

I really feel for you because it's a horrible situation to deal with but it can be done. You need to be strong be prepared to dig in for the long haul. I hope our success gives you hope!

Thank you for your reply.. well there is nothing really i can do about her daughter going to a private school. Some here even told me don't blame it on the kid.. which i am not. But its a big chunk of money $1000 monthly is enough to pay all of the those 4 cards he has for a year. I really don't know whats gonna happen. We also received a lot of calls but its from the bank not yet from the collection agencies.. soon it will be.

Our rent too is expensive we pay $1660 for 2 beds and bath and our lease wont be up til July 2010 so we are stuck til next year. We have cut off everything we can and leave the stuff we need for survival.. food and clothing. I have a little spare money on my own account but i am just afraid to pay his credit cards because what if they just take money from my account without my authorization because i am the wife? I am really confused right now.

Another concern, i wanna ask... In his Bank of America credit card. He put my name on it as an extention card. This is before we got married so my name there is my old last name. Is this gonna affect my credit score too? Is this considered as unsettled lien? I wanna apply for a secured credit because I am thinking at least one of us should have a good credit in the future.

He is still the main cardholder in the bank of america credit card, im just an extension. So i dont know if its gonna affect my credit score since it was on my old last name. Thats what im really worried about.

the fact that the card is in your maiden name and now you have a married name makes no difference. your identifier is still you SS number....that didn't change just because you got married, right. Since the credit report is based on one's SS#, it matters not what your name is.

If you are an authorized user on a credit card, it could still affect your credit...i.e. the account could still show up on your report as well, so if the account goes into default and charges off, the collection status could show on your credit report (though there may be a notation that you're just an authorized user, it still does not look good for the overall report.)

[angela920 0]

its not my card, its his card. I called them and have me removed and they did and they are gonna mail it to me. (i hope hes not lying to me) This is really frustrating me and thinking about killing myself already.

[rheanick 42]

its not my card, its his card. I called them and have me removed and they did and they are gonna mail it to me. (i hope hes not lying to me) This is really frustrating me and thinking about killing myself already.

Dont even think of killing yourself. That is not the right way to solve your problem. You have to be strong.

God won't give you a problem that you could not solve.

Perfect has a successful story. There is still hope.

[Don José 2]

Pay more than you owe.

I'm thinkin' you're nuts to pay more than you owe!

[rheanick 42]

Pay more than you owe.

I'm thinkin' you're nuts to pay more than you owe!

Pepe,

If i would compare my husband's salary and our credit limit, we are not nuts on our present practice. I won't reveal our finances here.

I would be the one saying to you... you are nuts for not paying more than you owe.

Edited September 4, 2009 by rheanick

[muñequita linda 0]

Pay more than you owe.

I'm thinkin' you're nuts to pay more than you owe!

Pepe,

If i would compare my husband's salary and our credit limit, we are not nuts on our present practice. I won't reveal our finances here.

I would be the one saying to you... you are nuts for not paying more than you owe.

Why do you have to pay off ABC Bank $10,000 when your loan balance is only $9,000? You are indeed crazy or your head is full of hot air! You have a problem expressing what you mean to say. I guess you meant to convey "pay more than the minimum required"!