halal meat

[tenderheartusa79 14]

I don't think he's being stubborn at all, those are his beliefs and you know that. He is passionate about those beliefs too. It is not rude for him to refuse the food that he doesn't believe in eating. In a way you are saying you're beliefs are more important than his, that its okay for you to pray over your food and do what you believe in doing. There are other meatless options at Wendy's, and all those places, instead of a burger he could have a salad if they don't offer the meat of his choice.

You're asking him to compromise his beliefs, that's wrong.

You rock cause I'm not stubborn at all and she doesn't want to understand that . its just my religion.

i hope she will understand that someday . cause sometimes she thinks my religion like a deal so we can get a compromise which is so wrong . believes are believes you can't change it for your love or you can't compromise

let me start by saying i am having some problems.to some it will be easy to answer.and some others will be hard.i need to know your point of view vj.i would appreciate the help and also the comfort so dont think i am causing problems i just need advice.me and my fiance have been fighting several times about many subject in our life one main one now is about halal meat.when in egypt its so easy to find halal meat around the corner.here in usa i live in the country so to get it.it will take about 2 hours.or if i even order it from online it was so incredibility expensive.he is a muslim and only eats halal meat .i am a christian and we pray over our food everytime we eat.and we dont eat anything with blood.and my family dont eat so much pork .i have giving that up was so bad for me.so my problem is and please be honest with me.is it such a big sin to just eat meat and pray over it.whats the sin.i was just wondering do alot of muslims when they come to america end up eating usa meat that is not halal.will you be in hell or what.because how he acts it just wont happen.but every restraunt here no halal.go to wendys.no halal.go to arbys,or even hardees,mcdonalds,red lobster you get the point.how do they think its easy for us that eat usa meat non halal.cant u just pray over it like jews and christians do.dont tell me all muslims pay all that money and expenses just to eat halal.please help me i am going insane.i even asked him if my mom cooks for the holidays or even me you will refuse to eat.and he said yes he will refuse do any of you think that is so impolite or rude.just explain to me what to do in this situation.what if we had children and they see mommy eating diffrent food.i hope you all see where i am comming from.sorry to bother anyone with this .its america halal is not so easy to find unless u r in the big city like NY.why travel 2 hours when meat is in the store about 5 minutes.any suggestions with a stubborn man.thank you so much vj you are wonderful and so kind to help people throug this process and God bless all of you.

Couple of (random) thoughts:

1. No, refusing non-halal meat is not rude.

2. Are you American? You don't write like one.

3. Move to Detroit.

Edited October 10, 2008 by Hot Guy

[tenderheartusa79 14]

there are a few ways to find halal meat.........we live on a small farm so is not a problem for us......but some people find a farmer that is willing to allow u to have animals there that u raise for hala meat another way is to find a slaughter house that kills correctly for hala meat.....either of these two way requires u to have a large freezer...while it does take more work to have hala meat in the usa it is possiable unless u would rather spend the extra bucks to purchase it already packaged.......for us we have to drive about 100 miles one way to find any kind of meat that is more than just a couple of packages here or there but i guess it all depends on how hard u want to work for it and how important it is to u.......when we dine out we can not expect to find hala meat not even in a place that may state it is there is nothing that can ensure it is really that..........good luck and i hope u find the solution that is best for u......

sara

I think you're looking at it the wrong way (that this is because he is stubborn) I don't think this is something you'll be able to convince him of, i.e. it's ok to not eat halal if it's too hard for you to get it. The way I see it, he pretty much has two options: be a vegetarian (he could eat fish as well); or you could relocate to a more urban area where halal meat is not so hard to come by.

Edited October 10, 2008 by Hot Guy

[tenderheartusa79 14]

Well...that's all going to be up to him. Different muslims handle it different ways. My ex [who is muslim] would eat out anywhere but would not eat foods that had any pork or alcohol in the preparation. Whether or not the meat was slaughtered religiously [zahiba] wasn't an issue for him. At home most of the meat was purchased at a regular grocery and he rewashed it saying something over [not sure what - I'm thinking shahada but I could be wrong]. This worked for him. Others it may not work for...

But this whole thing is something you should really think about. Will you be living near a Muslim community? Are there halal restaurants near by that will satisfy your urge to go out every now and again? Is he expecting you to adhere to all the dietary restrictions, regardless of where you are? I know of one mixed couple where the husband allows his wife to eat anything she wants outside of their house - pork, alcohol, whatever. He just doesn't want it in their home. Do you go to friends and family for meals? Are you prepared to give that up if he has a staunch halal only food rule?

The kid thing is a completely separate kettle of fish - all I can say is talk talk talk - better to know what's coming down the road now...

ETA - Seriously AJ is right - Detroit/Dearborn or Paterson NJ - you'll be golden there

Do you really need to bother with those specific cities?

It's quite easy to find in DC/Balto area--also, some branches of a fast-food chain Chicken Basket use halal meats, as do LOTS of desi restaurants.

Also for the OP--the commentators who ask "can't you pray over it like Jews or Christians do..." is definitely ignorant of Jews (I have specifically observed that Orthodox Jews and Adventists will NOT simply pray over dubious meat, but will go out of the way to ensure it's kosher) and likely ignorant of Christians as well.

[tenderheartusa79 14]

my husband is muslim and does not halal. some people are more religious them some i guess. i think when he gets here he will probably go to the mosque where he can ask them where to go for meat. also maybe they can all get together and take turns going for the meat 2 hours away. stock up and freeze it for a month and u will only have to make the trip once a month.

if u want to eat pork, do it when he is working or when u out alone.

dont stress on this, there are ways around things.

as for the holidays, u can supply the meat for your mom to cook. its not going to hurt a christian to eat halal for the holidays (or any time for that matter).

good luck.

thats what i really said to her but she is not listening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tenderheartusa79 14]

Do you still want to ask people here about it ??!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1-i think now after you read people answers here you will say they are different and they are not us !!!!!!!!!!

2-anyway all of them say I'm not stubborn at all its just my religion .

3-we can go to buy some halal meat from any store around you or we can make that trip to get some meat even once a month .

4-we can buy some meat to your mom on holidays so she can cook it for it . as people say its not going to hurt christian if you eat halal meat on your holidays or anytime as well .

5-you want to make a compromise with my religion which is so wrong ...........

6- stop fighting about that cause after you read that you have to find out that you wrong and you was wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mohamed and trina 0]

Do you still want to ask people here about it ??!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1-i think now after you read people answers here you will say they are different and they are not us !!!!!!!!!!

2-anyway all of them say I'm not stubborn at all its just my religion .

3-we can go to buy some halal meat from any store around you or we can make that trip to get some meat even once a month .

4-we can buy some meat to your mom on holidays so she can cook it for it . as people say its not going to hurt christian if you eat halal meat on your holidays or anytime as well .

5-you want to make a compromise with my religion which is so wrong ...........

6- stop fighting about that cause after you read that you have to find out that you wrong and you was wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Laura+Tom 2]

I think you two need to talk about this in private rather than on a message board.

[akdiver 3]

You're asking him to compromise his beliefs, that's wrong.

What if he believes in sex with animals and small children?

Of course. So it's OK to ask people to compromise SOME beliefs, just not others.....

But what if he says its his religion?

OK, OK, so SOME religions can be tolerated, but only if we don't find them TOO offensive....

where does it end?

If you can condemn ANY belief - then it is reasonable to condemn any belief....

Edited October 10, 2008 by akdiver

[mohamed and trina 0]

all i was starting out to do was ask advice what muslims do when they come to america i appologize if i made anyone unhappy.this is my first time being involved with middle eastern cultures so i know some people have to understand me.thank you all for your posts didnt mean to make anyone upset.God bless you all

[pedroh 21]

oh wow.. it all started like a simple question and Hotguy had to turn it into a Springer show!!

dude.. she was just asking.. don't be such a db and make a scene in a freakin board, you aren't 15 and this is not myspace (although sometimes VJ looks like that)

its true that Halal meat can be eaten by anyone.. but if its so hard to get or expensive.. u still gonna try? become vegetarian or just eat seafood..

Edited October 10, 2008 by pedroh

[Sprailenes 47]

all i was starting out to do was ask advice what muslims do when they come to america i appologize if i made anyone unhappy.this is my first time being involved with middle eastern cultures so i know some people have to understand me.thank you all for your posts didnt mean to make anyone upset.God bless you all

No one is upset. You have a lot to learn about your fiances religion but he also has a lot to learn about yours. It's good you two are talking about this, but perhaps you shouldn't be doing this on a message board with one another.

'Hot guy', just because everyone agreed with you doesn't give you the right to come on and act like that. Shame on you. This is your fiance, she was asking a question and was being very civil about it, you came on and turned it into a circus.

[sara..... 371]

all i was starting out to do was ask advice what muslims do when they come to america i appologize if i made anyone unhappy.this is my first time being involved with middle eastern cultures so i know some people have to understand me.thank you all for your posts didnt mean to make anyone upset.God bless you all

you have not upset anyone on vj because of ur questions i in fact am very proud of u for looking for the answer to something that seems to have been a hard question for u and something u didnt understand......................HOT GUY come on lighten up at least she is asking have u bothered to explain to her why its so important for us to eat hala meat? .............when two people from two different religions come together it takes a lot of talking from both sides and a lot of understanding because unless u explain to her kindly and gently (as Islam demands)....she cant know she didnt grow up with how our religion is or the demands and limits that are set on us.......same can be said for her religion u didnt grow up knowing what her religion allows or does not allow........talk it out work it out if u didnt love each other u would not have made the commitment to each other ..........HOT GUY it would have been more kind to respond to the suggestions we gave her as thank you or something proving a point on the forum not kool and u know better i know how most of our muslim brothers get a little testy but remember this is the girl that u love .........islam demands that u treat her with respect and kindness.........

[Aymsgirl 0]

I agree with Melinda and Mohamed. Halal can be very expensive or hard to get according to your location. Trina you are saying it is far and very expensive for your budget. Mohamed is saying that he is required to eat halal. I understand what both of you are stating here but the point is going to have to be a compromise.

As far as the meat in our home my husband and I are muslim and my two older children are not. Of course they don't care what they eat as long as they are fed but my husband and I have beliefs. If the meat is not available or we don't have the money for it we simply say Bismallah as we prepare and eat it. Islam isn't supposed to be hard and you need to eat and if the meat isn't available you have to either eat something else like fish, veggies, fruit or possibly say Bismallah.

There is compromise here that can be done. As far as meat for the holidays....how about you Trina, get some halal meat and cook it and bring it and then he has his meat to eat and everybody else is welcome to it.

Moh...I don't think that Trina was trying to prove a point but maybe she was trying to find ideas on what people do here. my thoughts for you is that marriage is all about compromise. There will be many more things to work on as you grow together but try and work the major things out before marriage. Halal meat shouldn't be a huge argument and for either of you to be stubborn. Neither one has to give up beliefs totally maybe just compromise. Best wishes to you!!

[sara..... 371]

I agree with Melinda and Mohamed. Halal can be very expensive or hard to get according to your location. Trina you are saying it is far and very expensive for your budget. Mohamed is saying that he is required to eat halal. I understand what both of you are stating here but the point is going to have to be a compromise.

As far as the meat in our home my husband and I are muslim and my two older children are not. Of course they don't care what they eat as long as they are fed but my husband and I have beliefs. If the meat is not available or we don't have the money for it we simply say Bismallah as we prepare and eat it. Islam isn't supposed to be hard and you need to eat and if the meat isn't available you have to either eat something else like fish, veggies, fruit or possibly say Bismallah.

There is compromise here that can be done. As far as meat for the holidays....how about you Trina, get some halal meat and cook it and bring it and then he has his meat to eat and everybody else is welcome to it.

Moh...I don't think that Trina was trying to prove a point but maybe she was trying to find ideas on what people do here. my thoughts for you is that marriage is all about compromise. There will be many more things to work on as you grow together but try and work the major things out before marriage. Halal meat shouldn't be a huge argument and for either of you to be stubborn. Neither one has to give up beliefs totally maybe just compromise. Best wishes to you!!

[pedroh 21]

now lets all go for some halal meat burritosss