Do You Ever Think You Might Be Doing Your SO a Disservice?

[Heracles 417]

The economy doesn't stink, it's just not as good as years past.

I don't doubt our decision to come here at all. Living in India would have been much, much worse.

Hmm I don't know about that. My friend is in Delhi and was saying how well everyone he knows is doing there. Especially when compared to his family members in the US and Australia..

[Heracles 417]

I know for myself and my wife coming here was a bad move financially. I mean just the other day I found out that one of my cousins has been contracted to work in a mine outside Perth for over $232,000 a year. He is an electrician.

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

I know for myself and my wife coming here was a bad move financially. I mean just the other day I found out that one of my cousins has been contracted to work in a mine outside Perth for over $232,000 a year. He is an electrician.

So you just like abusing the hell out of yourself? What on God's green earth are you doing here then?

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

The economy doesn't stink, it's just not as good as years past.

I don't doubt our decision to come here at all. Living in India would have been much, much worse.

Hmm I don't know about that. My friend is in Delhi and was saying how well everyone he knows is doing there. Especially when compared to his family members in the US and Australia..

I was born in the US. India is culturally not very receptive to people like me. This is my home, right here.

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

Salaam all,

So i'm home today and watching CNN and reading, and the US economy just seems to be getting worse and worse...

i have a lot on my mind with my husband's possible arrival here. i don't make a lot of money, and to hear other's stories, it will be months before he can work. Am i doing him a disservice by asking him to come and live here for (at least) a few years? The economy stinks, the dollar is down, job availability is way down, salaries stagnant, the cost of living skyrocketing.

in Morocco, we lived well... i had a good job, he had an okay job, healthcare is good in the capital...we had a nice apartment...

A year ago, when we decided to apply for this visa, and i asked him to come here, things weren't so bad with the state of the economy in the US. But now, it just seems like a downward spiral.

Am i hurting our possibility for a happy life together by asking him to come here? It's a lot on my mind... Does anyone else have these worries?

Thanks for listening,

hz

Better to be poor here than in some other countries if ya get my drift.

[Heracles 417]

I know for myself and my wife coming here was a bad move financially. I mean just the other day I found out that one of my cousins has been contracted to work in a mine outside Perth for over $232,000 a year. He is an electrician.

So you just like abusing the hell out of yourself? What on God's green earth are you doing here then?

For one

I am actually thinking of forfeiting this visa process. I am here in Australia now and working on a spousal visa for my wife to come here.

[Empress of Groovy 373]

I know for myself and my wife coming here was a bad move financially. I mean just the other day I found out that one of my cousins has been contracted to work in a mine outside Perth for over $232,000 a year. He is an electrician.

So you just like abusing the hell out of yourself? What on God's green earth are you doing here then?

For one

I am actually thinking of forfeiting this visa process. I am here in Australia now and working on a spousal visa for my wife to come here.

I can only assume that there's an Australian equivalent of VisaJourney.com that's better in every way. You could have discussions with likeminded folks (and their spouses) about the logical and streamlined process, and have friendly, genteel chats about what a wasteland the rest of the world is.

[Heracles 417]

I can only assume that there's an Australian equivalent of VisaJourney.com that's better in every way. You could have discussions with likeminded folks (and their spouses) about the logical and streamlined process, and have friendly, genteel chats about what a wasteland the rest of the world is.

Thanks for the info. They seem to be filled with UK citizens migrating there. Funny that hey..

[Imua 0]

Cherrish what you have now because that is the most special thing that life can ever give you.

Jon

Amen!

Ameen.

Absolutely, i agree.

Maybe i didn't express myself clearly in my original post. My Habib is still overseas....

over there i'm just worried that his life will be harder here, than there.... that is what i'm concerned and ruminating about...

I started a thread a few weeks ago about just this same concern.

I make near poverty wages for NYC(especially if you ask mawilson) and we will not be able to survive on my salary alone for long I am afraid. If we were to get a market rate apartment where we could live on our own it would cost half of my takehome pay just for rent, so we will be 3 people in a 1-bedroom apartment with no privacy until G is settled in a job - I am dreading it. He has only a high school diploma and college really isn't in the cards either in the near future. There is one Nepali employment agency here and it seems like there are a lot of bodega, gas station type jobs available here, but what if he is unable to find even that? He has family support over there and here he will have just me. So yes I am worried. The economy might be improving over there now that Nepal has achieved some stability and tourists are starting to come back, so eventually we will probably go back there. For now yeah I am definitely worried - he is going to find out that America is definitely not the dream country that some people think it is. There was an article in the NYT recently about some Latino immigrants actually going back home because job opportunities(mostly in construction) have dried up - scary.

[Imua 0]

Salaam all,

So i'm home today and watching CNN and reading, and the US economy just seems to be getting worse and worse...

i have a lot on my mind with my husband's possible arrival here. i don't make a lot of money, and to hear other's stories, it will be months before he can work. Am i doing him a disservice by asking him to come and live here for (at least) a few years? The economy stinks, the dollar is down, job availability is way down, salaries stagnant, the cost of living skyrocketing.

in Morocco, we lived well... i had a good job, he had an okay job, healthcare is good in the capital...we had a nice apartment...

A year ago, when we decided to apply for this visa, and i asked him to come here, things weren't so bad with the state of the economy in the US. But now, it just seems like a downward spiral.

Am i hurting our possibility for a happy life together by asking him to come here? It's a lot on my mind... Does anyone else have these worries?

Thanks for listening,

hz

Better to be poor here than in some other countries if ya get my drift.

About the only advantage to being poor here rather than poor in Nepal(assuming you have family) is the water won't make you sick - that's the conclusion I have come to.... Nothing else - unless you are sooooo poor you can qualify for Medicaid and can find a doctor who will accept it, then you have free healthcare. If you are 'keeping your head above water, making a wave when you can' poor then you will go bankrupt from one ER visit.

[Reba 2]

It really depends on where you're coming from and where you're going to.\

I moved from a rather large metropolitan city, with job opportunities making well over $50k per year, and in Canada with "free" healthcare, I never had to worry about how I'd pay for my next doctor appointment or exhorbitant health insurance plans.

Here in small town North Carolina, wages stink, and health insurance is incredibly costly, as is health care (an doctor visits here in town are scary at the best of times...the local medical community is perhaps not the best in the country ). My husband hasn't had a job for well over a year now, and there are NO prospects locally. Not even the fast food places are hiring these days. My job also is dangling precariously. Every day I worry that they'll announce they're shutting down.

So yeah, we're hoping to get out of here, head somewhere there's some jobs for now, and work on the immigration paperwork so we can move to Canada. It'll take a while because of a juvenile charge he has on his record, but we're packing up and hoping the paperwork won't take more than a year. Fingers crossed. in the meantime, we're trying to find a place within the US, closer to the border so I can see my family more often. I haven't seen any of them since last July

With our luck, by the time we get to Ontario the economy will suck just as bad up there. But at least we won't have to worry about paything thru the nose for healthcare and insurance. That's our biggest expense here.

[Niels Bohr 72]

Patti Ruie,

If your SO wants to go to college, apply for financial aid. Trust me, everyone gets them. Especially if half of your income goes into rent. This means your EFC is 0, so you will not pay. The school will find you subsidized federal loan which has lower interests than a private loan because they're borrowing or you're borrowing directly from the central bank. After your SO graduates from college (a usefull degree not like VPA, visual performaing arts), I'm sure it's not difficult in finding a job.

Sure going to college means spending 4 years in school, but, think of how long you'll be working to get a decent salary.

[Heracles 417]

With our luck, by the time we get to Ontario the economy will suck just as bad up there.

That is exactly how I felt after the move here. All of this hard work getting the paperwork ready, visas processed and moving my stuff here and then the economy tanks.

Now we have to fork out another $550 for removing conditions and then stick it out for a year, by the sound of it, to have it processed. #### that for a joke.

(a usefull degree not like VPA, visual performaing arts),

You crack me up man.. :rofl:

Edited May 17, 2008 by Boo-Yah!

[sereia 0]

I'm with Jenn... I would have done things differently have I had the chance to do them over again.......

Edited May 17, 2008 by sereia

[AlHayatZween 2]

Better to be poor here than in some other countries if ya get my drift.[/color][/size]

Yeah, i've been pondering it all night... and i think it's a valid concern, that life would be harder for us here than there...

Sure Morocco might be considered a "poor" country by some, but it's not like some other places... i had a well-paying job in Morocco. And i had the nicest apartment i ever had in my life there... with a balcony!! And i even had quality healthcare while i was there (in Rabat, can't say for the rest of the country).

The problem is that, like many countries in the world, my husband can't just come and visit here on a tourist visa (in the event that we lived there and chose to just come here and visit). For us, that has been a sticking point that makes this process so difficult. If he could just easily obtain a tourist visa, or a visa waiver, then maybe we would have chosen a different route.

i do agree, though, that he will have at least some new opportunities here. He will be able to go to school, which is great. And learn English. And like someone posted above, at least... finally... inchallah... we will be together!!

It's just worrisome because, we applied for this visa a year ago... and sure the economy wasn't great a year ago... but it was better than it is now. i didn't have these worries a year ago, when the economy hadn't tanked yet, and i was getting job contracts left and right...

i guess i'm just worried. it would be different if i had a well-paying job here...