Should There Be a "Come and Try It Out" Visa?

[Jaylen Brit 1]

Dating visa - no - and Im from VWP country

Cheaper flights? oh YES! lol then I could have seen him MANY more times! (And I mean both ways - not just to the US - then people whose fiancees are in places like Thailand or Russia would have been able to travel more often)

Its often not the actual distance but the cost of GETTING there thats a hurdle I feel.

I like the fast track EAD idea though - probably thats also fraught with fraud worries tho...

[mercuryroad 0]

I guess my feeling is if you are contemplating marrying someone, you should take that very seriously whether they live in the US or somewhere else.

So, why not take whatever time and money you have to in order to get to know that person and find out for sure if it is right for you before you start committing to someone moving to a new country? Admittedly, the VWP makes it easier for many of us, but there are other ways.

For me, it boils down to whether or not you are serious about the commitment (marriage and otherwise) that you're getting into. Either you are serious or you aren't. I don't think we should tax an already backed up system even more just to serve people who aren't quite sure.

IMHO.

??????

I think some of you are assuming your SO is actually able to visit you before the marriage. In my case this is not true. So when I hear stuff like you should be positive before applying for the visa and take this seriously........I think you are missing the bigger picture.

Mi amor is giving up a chance to do her physician residency in Spain which would have been much quicker and easier given that it would be done in Spanish. She is leaving her family and friends behind, leaving her home behind, leaving her car behind, leaving her whole life behind...........and she is doing this to come to a country that she never really had a desire to live in......she's doing this because we love each other very much.

She has only been to the U.S. one time in her life and that was when she was 10 years old (and it was Miami). She has no clue what she is walking into with life in the Midwest. Where she lives it is 50-70 degrees all year round.....she's never felt the cold of winter. The whole thing from top to bottom is foreign to her and we have no recourse to have her come and visit here first to check things out. Would you buy a house without giving it a walk through....of course not!

Despite all of that.....she is coming here because of our love and she is taking all of those risks without the benefit of visiting here because she is serious about our relationship and positive about the results. Being an intelligent and careful woman, however, it would have been nice for her ease of mind if she could have visited.

[rebeccajo 14]

Well, then, I would say that any "guest worker" programs that are being contemplated in Washington could be the answer for some.

If it were easier to come here and work for a year or so.....if you didn't have to be highly qualified, or an entertainer, or ayslum seeker....then maybe 'dating' could occur?

*devils advocate*

[TracyTN 237]

??????

I think some of you are assuming your SO is actually able to visit you before the marriage. In my case this is not true. So when I hear stuff like you should be positive before applying for the visa and take this seriously........I think you are missing the bigger picture.

Mi amor is giving up a chance to do her physician residency in Spain which would have been much quicker and easier given that it would be done in Spanish. She is leaving her family and friends behind, leaving her home behind, leaving her car behind, leaving her whole life behind...........and she is doing this to come to a country that she never really had a desire to live in......she's doing this because we love each other very much.

She has only been to the U.S. one time in her life and that was when she was 10 years old (and it was Miami). She has no clue what she is walking into with life in the Midwest. Where she lives it is 50-70 degrees all year round.....she's never felt the cold of winter. The whole thing from top to bottom is foreign to her and we have no recourse to have her come and visit here first to check things out. Would you buy a house without giving it a walk through....of course not!

Despite all of that.....she is coming here because of our love and she is taking all of those risks without the benefit of visiting here because she is serious about our relationship and positive about the results. Being an intelligent and careful woman, however, it would have been nice for her ease of mind if she could have visited.

No, I'm not assuming that your SO can visit you here. I think it sucks for those folks who can't get tourist visas. But obviously you can visit her, or possibly you could both meet in another country (Canada seems popular for that).

I also wasn't suggesting that someone who doesn't visit their SO a lot can't be serious about them. If I believed that, then I would have never fallen in love with my fiance before we met face to face. A lot of this process IS a huge leap of faith.

I was simply questioning how it would seriously hinder those of us who ARE serious and awaiting the process to have the system bogged down with applications from couples who want to use it to test their relationship. I'd rather them 'test it' on their dime, not mine (so to speak).

Edited May 3, 2006 by TracyTN

[anya-D 8]

Dating visa - no - and Im from VWP country

Cheaper flights? oh YES! lol then I could have seen him MANY more times! (And I mean both ways - not just to the US - then people whose fiancees are in places like Thailand or Russia would have been able to travel more often)

Its often not the actual distance but the cost of GETTING there thats a hurdle I feel.

I like the fast track EAD idea though - probably thats also fraught with fraud worries tho...

If the flight is cheaper, that help only half the problem.. the bigger problem is that it's VERY difficult to get anu kind of visa to USA. I've visited and lived in america one year each for 3 times of my life and I still got DENIED student visa to come to america (after went home as the program ended.. and just like to make everything by rules) but yea.. they denied me coz i have no ties to my country... and why the heck did i went back to my country in the first place and not just over stay my visa? (sorry - rant a bit) but you see... it's very difficult and no guaranteed at all that we will get a visa to come here. I'm lucky that my husband decide to come live in Thailand instead to get to know each other and start our K-1 from there... but it's also hurt us financially coz he missed all the work and money he shouldve got if he stay ehre and work.

this "try out" or what ever visa can be like K-1 + B2 as you dont have to get married at the end of the visit, at the end if you decide to marry you can do AOS , but cannot apply AOS with the different sponsor.. those kind of things.... I know it'll open a big opportunity for fruad but it's also a kind of good alternative for some of us.

and yea... EAD should be giving at the POE

[Yodrak 7]

pax,

12 - 18 months is long enough to put down roots and lose ties to the 'old country' - isn't that what we read has happened to many people in the 'divorcing, what can I do?' threads?

Or not. Depending on the individual.

Interesting thought, but see no benefit to either group although for different reasons. The first group is going to want to stay but will have no way of doing so, the latter group will be leaving anyway.

Yodrak

Well?

In Terri's thread, a few of us mentioned that the K-1 is not a "come and try it out" visa. True enough. The K-1 is, and should be, for persons who do indeed intend to complete a wedding of some sort within 90 days of the non-USC arriving stateside.

So what would you say to a "come and try it out visa"? A "Y" visa, maybe, LOL. (Or a "y not" visa. I'm so punny.) Such a visa would be valid for, say, 12-18 months. You could apply for AP and EAD with it, which would all expire at the expiration of the visa UNLESS a wedding happened and AOS was subsequently applied for. The USC would have to prove ability to support and might also have to agree to be responsible for the non-USC departing the country if things don't work out.

Would it be open to fraud? Well, yes, but let's not get too deeply into that issue. What would everyone think of this? Would you pursue it, or would you have?

[kc456 0]

If I had the chance to change the visa system, the most important thing I'd change is the EAD. For so many people going through all this, the money lost by not being able to work for months is a HUGE stressor on a fragile new marriage.

OMG, I hear you and agree with you. And how much would it help the adjustment process if the immigrant were able to get out in the workforce? A bunch, I think.

How many women do you know marry a man with no job? Yeah, I think the EAD should be part of the approved Visa package. Or at least granted at all points of entry.

I totally agree with that. That the single most important thing that would help the couples to adjust better.

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

The fact that you can't work or leave the US until EAD and AP is approved is the most moronic thing about this whole process and I struggle to see the reasons for it other than to create MORE paperwork for the USCIS to process, and to part us from yet more $$$.

Maybe they should make it easier for certain citizens to get B1 visas, but the government has bigger fish to fry than enable its citizens to enjoy long distance relationships.