kjenkins86

Happy New Year's everyone!!! I hope we all got the chance to spend some quality time with our family and friends over the hoildays.

Happy New Years everyone!!!

I usually domt make resolutions, but I have one for this year!

Im going to focus on me more, yep been putting everybody else first for over 13 years, tired of it and I deserve some me time on at least a weekly/biweekly basis. So with that said it might be a rough year for some, but if you cant take the heat get out the kitchen. Im so bad today

Be blessed everyone and in 2011 keep the stress down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JQ you are too funny

Hi Everyone,

Sorry I haven't been around for a few weeks. It's been hectic..

We got home from the Turkey/Michigan trip and had to head right to Singapore.Then back to Michigan for Christmas. Cancelled the Vegas/New Years part of our trip ( I will tell you why in a minute). We have traveled too much, and was supposed to leave for Jamaica next week, but cancelled that too.

Christmas was nice.. it was Fuat's first christmas ever and he was like a 4 year old waiting for santa. It was soooo cute to see him run to the tree in the morning to see all the gifts. My whole family loved it.. and it felt like we had a true "santa" type christmas like when you have young kids in the house.

Krystle, I don't know what to say except that God is with you and you will have a beautiful baby.. regardless

OK.. now for my news... I was going to wait until after the first of the year, but just really needed to talk to all of you this morning so decided not to wait. I don't want to depress anyone on New Year's eve.. so forgive me for not waiting...

Fuat has decided to leave. He bought his ticket yesterday and goes home on January 10th.

We haven't had it easy.. and he has said a few times that he was going to go home. Just couldn't take the cultural differences any more.. but this time he actually bought a ticket.

A part of me wishes he had gotten one and left immediately, so I wouldn't have to sit and count down the days to when he is going to leave me... It gives me 10 more days of suffering while I watch him pack, etc.

I can only pray he changes his mind, or that he will come back.. but I know the truth. He won't. He is used to a culture where women don't work, or only work in part time jobs in retail stores, etc. He is not used to women in executive positions, who aren't home to cook dinner at a certain time and who get business calls when they are not at work.. can't always answer the phone when they are at work because they are in meetings, etc.

My job has been a huge problem for us... I have been looking for a new job, preferrably in Michigan near my family, but he doesn't understand why I have to look for director or VP jobs.. why can't I just get a job as a sales person somewhere an work part time.

Oh.. I dont' know.. let me see. Because we need to eat! Pay morgage, etc. Yes, let's have me leave a $100K a year job, with insurance, bonuses, 401K & Profit sharing to be a sales person somewhere part time.

OH.. forgive my ranting. I am just so heartbroken and have no one to turn to.

I haven't told most of my family yet. Just my mom.. and she's heartbroken too, but told me if he is going to be like that I have to let him go.

I can't be a village girl, from Turkey, who sits at home waiting for him. Spends the day cleaning and cooking and doesn't go out of the house without him. HE didn't even grow up in the village, he lives in Istanbul, but his parents are from the "Village" and that's how their life is.

We both thought he could adjust.. but I guess he can't.

OK.. now that I have dumped all that one you...

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE.

I love you all

I've been anxiously awaiting your post because its been so long but I'm glad you're ok, that was my major concern.

In regards to the news you just broke, I'm sorry to hear that and that was my biggest fear for you, that he wouldn't adjust to how "American women's lifestyle" but you can't blame him, he's just not used to it. I understand when you said he isn't from the village but his parents are, but you did say he was the only son and his father expects him to.... Won't go into details but you know what you said.

I'm somewhat surprised that he would decide to leave after all you too have been through, to get him here AND the struggle with your illness right after he came.

I too wish for you that he would leave instantly, as opposed to waiting, that must be hard on you.

I hope he realizes his love for you is more important than going back home but if that's his choice then what can you do...

Are you going to get a divorce before he leaves? It's not a question you want to hear but its important to discuss.

Love you Jenn

Good evening ladies! Hope we all enjoyed our Christmas!

Tee happy anniversary again

Dan Dan that's great news, your honey will be here before you know it!

Always, thank you mama.

Besa, its about time ooman!!!

LadyD, look at the last updated date on the case.

Maggie, glad to see you finally figured out the blackberry. I HATE those phones!!! Lol, anyhow glad to hear that all is well and I can't wait to hear when you find your apartment. Goodluck ob AOS!

Frenzy, I just re-read your post and my reply and notice that I didn't post what I wanted to say, I was so distracted. However, I hope that they agree to be your do-sponsor and that they won't change their minds

Hi everyone!

Christmas was awesome!!! G kept complaining that he hasn't seen snow yet, well, this morning we woke up to a HUGE amount of snow!!! He was like a kid in a candy shop looking out the window every second. Then he couldn't sit still, so he went to go did the car out and came back inside an your later, car still half way trapped because it was that much snow.

Frenzy, thanks a lot for your words of encouragement. I think I posted before that my only hope is that the test is wrong, but my only hope is God. Therefore I let go and leave it all to him because as my pastor said, he made this baby, he can heal him, if only I have faith. I had a lot of faith throughout this visa process and it paid off at the end of the interview so I can have faith now. In the mean time, I'm just praying and I hope you all do the same for us

krystle, i am so so sorry to hear the news. I hope also that the tests are wrong. But I know you are strong and I know you will be an amazing and supportive mom no matter what the challenges are. hang in there!

Thanks Karen

Goodmorning yardies, one more day of work and then I'm off until January 3rd. Me and hubby are going to a spa resort for 2 days to relax and think things over and finally give the man some good good because since the procedure 3 weeks ago and the emotional roller coaster, poor thing ain't get none

Sorry if that was too much info but I needed to say it so I can laugh.

Left him snoring like a baby this morning, hopefully he'll be ok until I get home at 2:30, we're going to see the pastor.

Oh KJ

My thoughts and prayers are with you

Thanks Danna

KJ-

I KNOW that you are afraid... and with good reason!!! Just remember that you are human just like the rest of us and are allowed to be emotional. I too was afraid of the same thoughts that are haunting you! on somedays I felt that I was going crazy.... Then as I shared I spoke with the sincerest of heart to God and said out loud to him I don't know if I can do this but I TRUST YOU ! I will be praying that you can relax and find your happy place . And YES THERE IS A HAPPY PLACE!!!

I know there's a happy place and that I'll get there but only time will tell.

Just to let you all know, Maggie tried to reply but her phone didn't post her reply.

Tee, take a class that might interest you. I had that problem too and I took psychology of personality and marriage & family, I learned a lot eventhough I don't remember nothing now, lol.

Natalie, thanks for liking my comment, or I guess that would've been my status, lol.

Reality finally hit my husband, I've never seen this. man cry before, much less to cry so hard, I could barely get him to calm down. But he's still up watching tons of YouTube videos on fragile x...

Goodnight yardies.

:DGood Morning KJ!!!

Goodmorning

I'm in happy mode right now because I'm at work and have nothing to do so I took out my doppler and was listening to the baby's heart beat and what do you know?

I felt him move for the first time

I swear di bwoy almost bax di doppler outta mi hand

Krys, Im there for you... smiley better not make me go there!!!

Dan-Dan, I was thinking along the same lines. Im glad you could share your experience with us. God bless you and your family

Smiley just gotta wake up and face reality

Scared of course your scared. You should be worried. Even if the dr said that the baby was fine. understand KJ nothing is guaranteed.

Im scared to go into labor in the next few weeks , Im scared bringing home a baby that I dont know will cry all the time or sleep.

Im scared to pop this titty out and breastfeed for the first time.

Wasnt you scared when you went to JA for the first time and stayed with your hubby? With no friends or family

How about the time you started a new school and didnt know anyone? or a new job?

Thats how the baby feels, he dont know what or how you will act. But he is thriving on your love. Stop stressing about his condition because he can feel it. Give it to God!

Talk to him like nothing is different and loveeeeeeeeeeeee him honey just love him.

You always talk about a psychic, you need to leave that person along and PRAY!!!

Please KJ just pray for your situation and like Sugar said, dont speak anything negative over that baby.

He will be perfect you just watch!!!!!!

Love you!!!!

Girl you do not have to tell me twice to leave dem dyam psychic alone coz EVERYTHING he said was wrong! I ain't even mad at him, gotta make that money!

But ys you're right, leave it God. I don't thik less of my baby at all, I still love him, still want him and can't wait to meet him

Ah JQ, I wasn't scared when I went to JA for the first time to see hubby, I was excited

Lol, just kidding but I get what you're saying hon.

Well thats our job to keep you amused and ya spirits up! So snap out of it missy!

AND auntie tee! and uncle chenko... we are only a couple of hours away so call on us... and since I wont have a job....I would be glad to assist with Aidan!

You do not have to invite me and Aidan over, WE coming! Especially since he's gonna be a summer baby and I don't have to go back to work until September! Girl you gonna be tired a your house smelling like diapers

Im going to recommend that you stay in prayer and join a support group. God is the hearer of ALL prayers Krys. Just put your trust in HIM! Talk to your Pastor about all of this

I'm praying up a storm, God soon tell mi fi stop now, him hear

Good morning VJ family!

I hope that everyone has a GREAT holiday and remember that Christmas is not just on the 25th but its all year round, because we have to give and be forgiving to one another! It doesn't always have to be giving in the material since.. Just like Dan-Dan, Mrs. P and JQ! gave KJ the gifts of sharing their personal experiences with us!!!!! Let's remember to build each other up and not break each other down!

Oh and my university needs to stop playing and post my dayum grades LOL

They saving the best for last!

I know it's scary. But also know that sometimes when doctors tell you all of these crazy things, it doesn't come to pass. I have a friend who was supposed to be severely mentally retarded, but came out normal and healthy. I know it doesn't help the waiting and not knowing, but you just have to hope. You're a strong woman and you've wanted this baby for so long. You can do this. You can do ANYTHING. And when things do get rough there are support groups for mothers of handicapped children. It may help to talk to people who are going through the same thing.

You can do this!

Just overwhelmed...

My only hope right now is that the results are wrong and this is just a test of my faith in God.

Oh, Krystle...I'm so sorry. But I know that no matter what that baby is going to grow up in a happy and loving home because he is a child that is so wanted. A lot of children don't have that in their lives. I know that this is going to be hard, because my brother is autistic, but I wouldn't give him up for the world. For all of his issues and all of the medical stuff he's gone through he is still an amazing person. He always makes me laugh when he does one of "his" things(i.e saying "####### Cheney is a son-of-a-######!" periodically throughout the day or bending the corners of his favorite baseball cards). Children with special needs are at times hard to handle, but they are little rays of sunshine too.

Always remember that God will never give you more than what he knows you can handle. He has faith in you that you can give this child the best home.

How is G handling the news?

Hi Kayla, thanks for the encouragement but I'm just scared that I won't be able to handle it

G is angry, at whom I can't tell you becaue he's not talking much. That's another thing that scares me, that he doesn't understand and he might walk out on us...

KJ, echo what sugarapple & Dan_Dan said. ALL things happen for a reason, even if we don't figure out the reason until next week, next year, 20 years later, or ever.

Thanks for the encouragement!

KJ, just as everyone has already said...God can make the impossible possible. We are here for you and Smiley.You don't have to go through this alone. Adian has so many prayers going up for him and Auntie Sheia and Uncle Den are certified baby sitters anytime! Keep the faith. If you need anything...you already know...

Amen Dan-Dan!!!

Thanks Ash!

I went ahead & straightened my hair. Now it'll be a matter of keeping it straight until Saturday evening.

You look soo different!

KJ let me tell you a quick story, I know these 2 ladies that was in this car on rainy day. In the car also was one of the ladies 2 kids and the other lady baby daddy and she was pregnant. Some how turning a corner the car lost control. There was a bad accident. The man in the car died instantly and the 2 year old boy in the car was knock out and barely breathing. When they were rushed to the hospital the child was in a coma. For the next 3 weeks, the lady had several chances to take her child off life support because the dr said he would have permanent damage from the swelling and be mentally retarded. Alot of her family was telling her it might be best. She still wanted her child and didnt care for the outcomes except for him to be alive. After 2 months he came out the coma, and was just like the dr said. Very challenging but the lady did all she could to research and get the help that was offered from this terrible tragedy.

This happened in 1997, These ladies were 2 of my older sisters. My nephew just turned 16. He is a miracle blessing and is trying to be really independent. He tries real hard but who I commend most is my sister, she has had 2 kids after him and still treats him no different from the other 3, and makes sure dont know one else treat him any different!

I also have a friend that had twins and 4 months later they were in a car accident. One came out without a scratch, but the other was paralyzed from the waist down. Its hard having a child with challenges but the parents have to be strong, That girl is now 21 and very independent. Her mother still has to change and bathe her but other than thsat she do everything for herself in that motorized chair. My friend took that vowel that she will help her daughter for the rest of her life, and so did my sister because thats what you do when you bring a child in this world.

Nothing is guaranteed ///kj and I want you to remember that its all a gamble in God's world and we have to pray abd get through!!!

You were on my mind now and its 3am and I had to comment on this and God sent me to this website http://www.nfxf.org/html/home.shtml

National Fragile X Foundation

Currently there is no definitive, single treatment for Fragile X. However, there are a variety of ways to help minimize the symptoms of the condition. Children with Fragile X who receive appropriate education, behavioral or physical therapy, and medication have the best chance of using their individual capabilities and skills. Even those with significant mental retardation can learn to master many self-help skills.

There is ignorance with lack of education remember that hun and study all you can with this for your and hubby's sake and beat this. The devil so busy trying to discourage us with anything thats not perfect hell we aint perfect. But this little boy just wants to live and see the world and get love and I know for a fact you will spoil him.

OK talked enough this morning back to sleep til I have to get up in 2 hours

Who is this sexy lady !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Get it girl,

i looks really cute

Steven gone sweat it out this weekend lol

This story touched my heart in many ways just like Dan Dan's story did and I thank you so much for taking the time out to make a point. However, I'm just scared, scared that I might not be able to handle it, scared that I might break and quit, just scared. As of now I'm confused and haven't got a clue on where to turn or what to do next...

Hey KJ,

I agree with Dan_dan God will not give you more than you can handle. I know you will love your son more than anything in the world no matter what.

We will only speak positive things about Mr baby Jenkins. From the Vj sister lips to Gods ears. Love you and kisses!!!!

Excuse you, his name is Aidan

Just kidding but your right Sugar.

KJ--I know this is exactly the opposite of what you were hoping for, but I agree with what Dan-Dan said. The only person who TRULY knows outcomes are God! Medicine is not an exact science, remember that-and indicators are not definite. Now with that being said, do all you can to research the condition, and have your husband research too. And when you're researching, think not only in terms of challenges, but abilities as well. I like what Finesse said--see if you can contact the ARC or some other formal community group to assist you with getting a better understanding as to what may lie ahead. And try to reassure husband that there are still many opportunities for his son--that having a diagnosis does not mean that his child will be an invalid, incompetent, etc. And most of all, remember that we are all here for you. If you need me to look stuff up, I will. Whatever I can do to help I will. Just continue to pray and keep the faith. Take care of yourself and baby boy. You and husband don't forget to support each other!

Tamisha

At this point I'm trying my best to stay positive but its harder than I thought.

I'm so sorry to hear that but as everyone has said God is good and he will bring you and hubby thru this I will keep you guys in our prays and remember God is love.

Thank you hon.

I haven't posted in almost a month!

Anyhow, as all of you know, I'm pregnant and during a routine bloodwork I did, I found out that I'm a carrier for fragile x. This was about 2 months ago so I had to see a genetic counselor and do a procedure called cvs. I got the results today, the baby is a boy and he is going to be moderate to severely mentally retarded...

Good Morning KJenkins86 ,

I am SOOO sorry that you are going through this!!! But I have some good news, believe in GOD and all things are possible.... I had a similar experience with my older daughter, the doctors told me that She would be born with Trisomy 8 I am not even sure that I spelled it correctly but I under went sooooo many test and the amnio that the DR's concluded that my child would b mentally challaged and would not live past 3 years of age and that I should consider have an abortion. I KEPT believing GOD and never allowed anyone to speak negatively about my situation. I just prayed and told God I wasnt sure that I could handle the challenge before me but I would follow his will and if that meant my child being mentally challenged I would expect His will and press forward but She was born with NO PROBLEMS beautiful and HEALTHY!!!!

Just Keep the Faith and All Things WILL WORK OUT FOR YOUR GOOD ! I will be PRAYING FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY!!!

WOW! God is good all the time, all the time God is good. I'm ready to take on the challenge as this news doesn't make me think less of him or love him any less. I still want this baby and will do all I can to make him comfortable as possible. Thanks for your word of encouragement

Goodmorning yardies! Hope we're having a wonderful start to our week

As some of you already know, I found out that I'm a carrier for fragile x and ended up having to test the baby to see if he would be affected or not. Just got the results this morning and unfortunately he is going to be mentally retarded.

As for myself, I'm pretty confident that its not the end of the world but I'm worried about my husband because he's not saying much about how he feels about it. As some of you may know, Jamaicans have a tainted picture on mentality, they don't believe it exists and they describe it with one or two words "fool or mad man/woman"

Have a good day everyone.

Happy Saturday before Christmas everyone! As it stands, I have not done any Christmas shopping. I dread the experience so much I put it off until the last possible day! I'm thinking I will thow myself into shopping tomorrow...hope everyone is doing well!

Hey Mrs. Palmer, I don't blame you one bit. Most of mine was online and the most special gift, is lost somewhere, walmart can't figure out why there's no tracking info so I might have to reorder it

Just when I thought I was done, I opened my big mouth and told my mom I'll go shopping for her to get my nieces and nephew gifts.

I gotta get up out this bed first, lol.

YES!!! This is what I'm talking about. Anyone else? Come on down!! I was out in short sleeves tonight and just slighty chilly, but I'm extra sensitive to the cold so you all would have been fine. Well, maybe KJ would have been a likkle chilly too.

Hey all !!

Hey Brooke!

You're right, I would've been chilly but as ling as I've got your lounge chairs and a blanket I'll be good!

Goodmorning yardies!! Thank God it's Friday, next week I work up until Wednesday then I'm off for a whole week and a half! It's great working for a school

Feel better mama...

Condolences to Steven's grandfather...

Aww Jewrica, things are coming along smoothly!

Thats great!

I was looking at houses in florida last night *sigh* I cant wait...

You ain't leaving me and smiley behind, we all going to crash Brooke's place, me, smiley, baby boy and you and chenko!

Hope your head stops hurting.

I'm curious: why were you blow drying it? To keep it straight? I remember the ONE time I had mine professionally straightened. I was at the salon for 5 hours and spent about $100. It was raining when I left. I got home & wrapped it. But when I woke up the next morning, it was an Afro. I cried.

Also, that gave me an idea. Steven has never seen me with straight hair. I'll have to straighten it while he's gone & greet him that way when I pick him up.

I usually relax my hair but it was growing out and I needed to touch up the roots. So I would wash and roller set it and blow dry the roots but I don't like blow drying, it makes my hair limp.

5 hours? $100?? I guess because you're completely natural, I just had nappy roots and that would only cost $20

When are you moving to Florida?

Both of those are pretty names.

She's moving after I have the baby and I convince my husband that Jersey is too cold

nat- sorry to hear of your hubbys grandfather passing

may he Rest In Peace

oooh will you take a pic so i can see you with straight hair?

you think hubby will like it?

my hair is looooong and curly- hubby told me he didnt like my hair when i straightened it

and no, he did not sugar coat it either- "whatchoo do to your hair? no sah, make it curl up again" well excuuuuuuuse me mr. diva! lmao

You have me rolling!

I've been busy and out of the loop, but wanted to share this. Then again maybe this is old news and I'm outta the loop on this too.

A girl that is in the process of going through the K-1 just told me that now the embassy emails packet 3 and then requires that you send all the forms back, as opposed to bringing all the forms on interview day. This makes so much more sense. I think we all were wondering why they didn't do this before. Remember when we had to say our honey's never got packet 3 in the smail mail and could they email it? I guess they heard enough of that to decide to just do that the first time. Anways, I thought this was neat.

Hope everyone is ready for Christmas!!!!

Well it's about time!! I'm still mad that the petitioner can't attend the interview! But hopefully that will change soon.

Godmorning yardies! Hope we're all having a good week/day.

As for me, it's always something. When I found out I was pregnant, I decided I wasn't going to put a relaxer in my hair anymore. I kept blow drying for 4 months but I couldn't take it any longer so I went and got a relaxer yesterday. I don't know if it's because I have a cold and I'm super congested but I have the worst headache ever

Hopefully it won't last all day...

hey y'all....

im watching a show on the history channel called " The Naturalized"

its all about immigration to the United States- so interesting

anyways- didnt know who else to share this with LMAO

later

I like watching those things but I wasn't home at that time.

Hello, everyone. Many new names in here. I need to start hanging out more...

We just got back from Jamaica on November 28, but this week my husband's grandfather passed, so he's going back Friday... returning Christmas Day (afternoon). So I'll be home alone all next week.

Eric_Jew Nug, your story about the washing was hilarious. Good intentions gone awry. One time a friend was staying with me for a few days. She called herself running the dishwasher for me, but somehow in her 25 years never knew that you couldn't use regular dish liquid in the dishwashing machine. I got to clean up the soapy flood in the kitchen.

Sounds applicable. I'll have to look for it when I'm home alone next week.

So sorry to hear about hubby's grandfather passing away but one week goes by fast and he'll be back before you know it.

If you've never used or owned a dish washer thyen chances are that you wouldn't know that you can't use regular dish detergent so that was understandable.

He he...mi a come with a big shield....I have a big 12 year old boy and after what happened to my friend call me coward!!!!

Thanks for your suggestion I will definitely pass it on.

Lol @ big shield!

Every child is different and no matter how good their parents are, how well they were grown, they are going to do whatever they please and sometimes it will only get worse when they come here and realize that 911 and child protective services can "rescue" them...

Good afternoon yardies, hope all is well and Always is resting and staring at her baby girl!

I expected the results of the procedure to come yesterday but I should've known that since the preliminary resuts were late, then the final report would be late too. So I sat by my phone all day today just waiting for the call and the minute I ran to the bathroom I came back to a missed call and a voicemail saying I won't get the results until next week

I will but kinda feel left out cause you guys have a nice little family going on here and I feel like the sister in law....he he he... and plus seems like the baby fever catching and mi nuh waan catch none. I always check in to see whats happening though even when I dont post anything. I will definitely let her know and she is very perturbed about it right now.

Feel left out? Please girl! Just come with the wata blocking shield and join us

This is too funny!!!!!

KJ, mi wait pon ya answer!!! *Tapping my feet* LOL

Tee you ain't ask me no question

Hope you feeling a little better Mama KJ!!!

Better? Baby bwoy just started!

Omg that's hilarious Jew!! And yea, as DW would say, po thang. I guess he thought they were both the same thing...

Hey Yardies!!!!

Congratulations on all the baby mothers in here!!!! I hope I wont be joining anytime soon. I finally got my interview letter for January 10. Hope everything go okay. I little bit excited and nervous. Cant wait to finally make some real progress with mi life.

So to all my Jamaica mothers....I have a thing a bother mi and I need your advice. I have a friend who got married, migrated with her son and now living with husband. The son is twelve years old....start thinking that he is a man and came in at three am. She rass him and he called 911 and told them that she beat him with BB bat. Anyways she want to send him back to Ja but she have a little baby and Social services say if she send him back or he is not there when they make a surprise visit then they going to take both children away form her. Now my question is what do you do in a situation like this? Its not me but I am soo upset because some kids dont know the sacrifice you make for them and then they play a fool of themselves!

Hi! Come around more often and that vj breeding wata will catch you so becareful

Anyhow, I dodn't see why they would take her baby from her because she's sending her son back to Jamaica. My bf is a social worker and she said that doesn't sound right, the concern is for the older child but she should makesure the case is closed BEFORE she sends him to JA. Hope that helped...

Much Respect Empress!!!

I am on the job now looking for the immunizations that he needs so that we expedite the process!!! I don't need ANY problems!! They say Jamaica No Problem, I say Jamaica Mo Problems ... Again Thanks for the heads up on the info!!

I agree with you and the "Jamaica Mo Problems"!!