adam1

I did analyse all the replies, I think everybody's opinion is different, but I will do what works for me and her.

I'm glad you are asking strangers online instead of talking about it with your wife. Good communication, huh? Does she happen to have internet access and does she know about VJ? If yes to both, you may end up in trouble at some point. lol.

She doesn't have internet and i'm not scared from her either. But I do respect her too much. and I don't want to do something that will upset her. thats why I'm trying to ask other people with similar experience.

Looks like a decent place to me. What do YOU think you should do Adam1?

Knowing my wife if I tell her that I will be dancing with girls she want sleep. one time I was talking to her and I got a phone call from one of my femal friend and she asked me all kind of question about her( is she married, how long did we know each other, what does she look like...) she is very jalous...

OK then, I guess you answered your own question. Do NOT under any circumstances dance with another girl! And expect the third degree questioning just for going. Take it from one jealous woman married to a MENA man. ;-)

I totaly agree with you.

oh God i know im gonna get fried for this question but i have to ask it.......ur s/o is from a mostly muslim country........they they dance there? most of us do not dance in public that are muslim so i guess that would have to be the biggest question in my mind before giving an answer to the question

sara

i didn't get it , can you come back again?

Why do you HAVE to dance with other girls? Can't you just dance by yourself?

If he rubs against himself in a club they'll throw him out. I don't think they allow masturbation.

Depends what kind of club he's going to....

International, all kind of music and girls. http://www.trianglefiesta.com/party2.php

i want to go!

first friday every month, you are more than welcomb...to but SOLO

Looks like a decent place to me. What do YOU think you should do Adam1?

Knowing my wife if I tell her that I will be dancing with girls she want sleep. one time I was talking to her and I got a phone call from one of my femal friend and she asked me all kind of question about her( is she married, how long did we know each other, what does she look like...) she is very jalous...

looks like you have a very short timeline. you haven't been waiting long and probably don't have much longer.

when i first started this wait- i tried the 'sit at home like a good little wifey #######.' that didn't last long. i would have been on psych meds by now if i didn't go have fun. do what ya gotta do, but know you're limits. however, you are already married. i think your limits are more limited

now, when he gets here---neither one of us are dancing with anyone but each other ever again.

so if you are not married, its ok to go out and have sex!!!!

Why do you HAVE to dance with other girls? Can't you just dance by yourself?

If he rubs against himself in a club they'll throw him out. I don't think they allow masturbation.

Depends what kind of club he's going to....

International, all kind of music and girls. http://www.trianglefiesta.com/party2.php

I'm confused now??????!!!!!!!!!!!

My friends from college invited me to go out with them to an international party tonight, I want to go but I don't know if my wife will like it or not. She overseas waiting on her visa and I'm here waiting to. I ask her one time and she said just live you normal life and be happy. The problem is she doesn't know that if I go out to club nights I will have to dance with girls and that's one thing that I can't help Hip Hop

Help me out here I don't want to lie, at the same time want to go out, I can go out but not dance and that's hard to!

or should I ask for permission?

childress- you can teach me a few things in farsi

Man 3 mahe keh dar madrasse Farsi hastam. Farsi baladnistam. Not much anyway. lol

I think it means you are taking classes or learning Farsi. that's what I could pick out of your words.

Very good! Yes I said that I have been in Farsi school for three months and I do not know Farsi.

see I told you arabic and Farsi are very close

childress- you can teach me a few things in farsi

Man 3 mahe keh dar madrasse Farsi hastam. Farsi baladnistam. Not much anyway. lol

I think it means you are taking classes or learning Farsi. that's what I could pick out of your words.

childress- you can teach me a few things in farsi

Man 3 mahe keh dar madrasse Farsi hastam. Farsi baladnistam. Not much anyway. lol

What that suppose to mean?

you didn't understand, sorry about that! she just told me that she do speak Moroccan and that she learned it from her grandparents when she goes to Morocco on vacation. If you keep reading our posts I promise you will learn something new everyday.lol

U may have some use for Arabic its close to farisi(Iranian language), your husband language.

Since we're not generalizing how about we stop assuming that the US is a bad place to raise children since according to you most Americans have low morals. So when Mid Easterners behave badly there are crazy ppl in every country but when Americans do that means we have bad morals...in general.

I hate to argue but you do realize that we're American and saying that most of us have low morals and that *our* homeland is a bad place to raise children is offensive.

we have thought about it for retirement but for now no. that could even change as retirement is along time away.

as for children respecting their parents....my husband daughter wont even call him daddy but his first name due to his ex wife's upbringing of the child. that is not respectable. he might not be her husband any longer but he is his daughters father and should be braught up knowing that. is this how nice muslim woman should be bringing up thier children? so u see ####### happenes everywhere and everyone....not just america.

Please lets not generalize there is crazy people in every country and religion if we continue to bring good and bad example we will never come up with a result, we want this to be a positive debate.

thanks

Hi Kenza

I was just there four months last year. It is true that the time get longer as you stay, especially in the winter time. Ow, I love summer time in Morocco. However, with a job or business, it is great. Me, and my wife are definetly thinking about that, in the future though.

That's the thing though...in Morocco your either very rich with your own business or poor...the only motivation in me going there is to make a difference some how!

One of my wife condition to marry me was to go back to Morocco one day and raise our kids there, I agreed and I always wanted that. the main reason for that is to raise our kids based on Islam and Moroccan tradition, you grow up in the US and you know what happens to a lot of kids in high school( drugs, sex...) its not easy to raise kids in the US, Most of them have no respect for there parents, also think about the third generation and their kids. you are probably one of the lucky ones you were born and raise in the US and grow up as good Muslim, your father did a good job .

Its not easy to go back to Morocco, espestialy for you because your US is you home and you parents probably still live in the US verces you hubby's parents. if you love your husband you will be happy with him any where he goes. If he ask you this again tell him I will go to the moon with you if you decided so! what ever makes you happy!!

one more thing lets not jump to conclusion after he come over her he may change his mind like your dad

u r kidding right? i think u need to eat ur words and then come back and appoligize to me.

I apologize to all Americans including my self, I'm not trying to offend any body, I'm human and I do mistakes.

I came to this country with a college degree and I got another one here, I work hard every day, I pay almost $20000 in taxes a year and I don't get back non of it....I don't send money to Morocco I bought a house In NC and I spend every bit of it here....I go to Morocco and other countries every year to learn about other cultures. I didn't come to the US for money or to get citizenship, I already have residency of France from my father they have better social system than US . I came to the US for knowledge and to learn about the culture and it was a very good experience, I have more American friends than Moroccan, my best friend name is Robert he is 55 years old I went with him and his family to Brazil and we stayed in a bad neighborhood so we can learn about Brazilian people life... I learned that I can be poor and enjoy my life and I can be rich and said.

what ever you girls said about Morocco is true. Its my country and I believe its corrupted in low scale. I hate to talk politics but you know what can of corruption we got here in the US ( Washington) high scale corruption. Morocco is a third world country and it will be for a while unless people like me move over there try to change it it will stay that way. Morocco is improving very fast compare to the rest of the African countries, some body has to suffer to make the change, America was not like these when the pilgrims came over in the 16 century or just 40 years ago when the white men and black men couldn't use the same toilet. Morocco as a country never harmed any other country or trough a nuclear bomb on them. I don't like to talk politics please don't get me started.

hassan_debbie: your husband said he couldn't live there any more, ask him where did he grow up and spend his last 20 years also tell him if you get deported from US where would you go and of course no country would take him but Morocco, But know he have options and of course he will chose the easy route( blond wife, diet cook, Double cheese Burger , DVR)

I'm sorry if I offend anybody again I don't mean to do that? I just like critical thinking and I'm still in the US

we have thought about it for retirement but for now no. that could even change as retirement is along time away.

as for children respecting their parents....my husband daughter wont even call him daddy but his first name due to his ex wife's upbringing of the child. that is not respectable. he might not be her husband any longer but he is his daughters father and should be braught up knowing that. is this how nice muslim woman should be bringing up thier children? so u see ####### happenes everywhere and everyone....not just america.

Please lets not generalize there is crazy people in every country and religion if we continue to bring good and bad example we will never come up with a result, we want this to be a positive debate.

thanks

Thing is the family I talked about the kids were very closely monitored. The parents always knew what was going on. I saw it. Are you trying to tell me ppl raised in Morocco or other MENA countries all grow up with the highest morals and always do what "Allah" wants? I'm sorry but I must disagree. Now if you want to argue that you prefer them to grow up surrounded by the culture that's a better argument. I have this same argument with my husband.

Please don't assume that Americans only want their kids happy and they don't care about their future or their morals. High morals doesn't necessarily come from being Muslim or any other religion. Some of the least moral ppl I've known have been religious.

I'm not here to argue or push my idea I'm just just answering Kenza question and idea, we are all here talking about an important subject that concern millions of immigrants and there American spouses. I'm not saying you are right or wrong, but what work for you my not work for me or somebody else. at the end you do what works for you? and will do what works for me. My dad lived in France for 7 years and he went back to Morocco, took a huge pay cut, But it made him happy, good bless him with 9 kids all college graduates and five off married and happy, plenty of grand kids....what else. when we were kids we asked our mom to take us to France to live but my dad always refuse to talk about that subject and he was always against it. My dad still have friends that still live in France they come visit him every year and they always reminder him that he made good choose by coming back to Morocco because they compare his children to theirs and they can see the difference.

I don't know what to tell you, you are from here I think you should stay here and do your best and it will work for you. I'm an immigrant and I will always be no mutter how educated I am or how much money I make, I will always be asked where I'm from.

ADAM 1

"to raise our kids based on Islam and Moroccan tradition, you grow up in the US and you know what happens to a lot of kids in high school( drugs, sex...) its not easy to raise kids in the US, Most of them have no respect for there parents, also think about the third generation and their kids. "

this is a valid point and one I agree with. I wish that their was more opportunity for either one of us there but there isnt. Living with his mother is not an option so we would have to be totally self sufficient, which, we can be here, but not there. I would have no qualms to live there but children are here and still need me too much. After some years of prosper here we can invest in a place there maybe and go back but I dont forsee us living there at least for another 8 years, minimal. We will just have to be content visiting.

I hear you Sandrila you have a different situation, if you got the idea it doesn't matter how long it's going to take, we may dies before we fulfill our dreams!!! But at least we are talking and thinking about it. My situation is different I have a house in Morocco and what's important both my family and my wife are over there.

Don't take me wrong I get annoyed when I go to Morocco for vacation, I always feel good when I land back in the US, but two weeks lather I get homesick again. there is no privacy in morocco everybody like to get in your business and show you what to do, but Guess what I want be listening or just accept it and think of it as a culture difference.

I don't mean to butt in because this doesn't have to do with Morocco but it does have to do with Arab/Islamic culture. I know that everyone wants to raise their kids in a MENA country because the theory is that's the only way to ensure a child will be raised "right". I know a very lovely Arab/Muslim family who has raised their children here (4 children) and they turned out wonderfully. The oldest daughter is now almost finished with college after attending an Islamic high school/grade school. She has been married for two years. All of the children are very respectful and none of them have gotten into any trouble re: drugs, alcohol, premarital sex. It can be done here in the states.

I totally agree, It depends on the environment (parents, home life, friends, school).... I live in Raleigh NC we have big Muslim community and I see what's going on, a lot of kids will act good in front of there parents and when there parents a not around guess what.....I use to go to Friday prayers and meet a lot of young friend then meet them again Friday night at club nights or a bar. I always feel bad for doing that but they didn't...

I want my kids to grow up in Morocco then when they get older they can come to the state live or work or do what ever, I want them to have a solid ground and options.

As a Muslim I worry a lot about the future of my next generation, not like most American they just want to see there kids happy. I want to make sure Allah is happy first then my kids then me. That's my opinion.

Morocco has change a lot lately and there is a lot of opportunities over there to. If you decided to go take a good degree with Bachelor and Up. or a big piece of change and you should be fine. tray to buy a house and a car before you decided to move. school system is free and the basic healthcare is either free or cheap. some people would say the school system over there is not good, but am a tell you based on my experience, I was an average student in Morocco, I pass High school with Passable means C average, But when I got when to college I was the first one in my promotion, I got all kind of scholarships and I got a job before I finish school. the only problem I had at that time was English, I understood everything But I couldn't talk. it took me a year..

Also if decided to move I'm not expecting people to trait me special or to have everything that I have here. I will be ok with anything. when I go on vacation I enjoy going to souk (market) walking everywhere, eat a lot of organic food, go to the beach and play soccer every morning...what I like the most is No Billlllllls no property taxes.

I did the math one time and I found if you house is paid for you will only need about $400 a month to eat and live if nothing out of the ordinary come up. my father has a family of 6 people and he only makes $350 on his retirement.

I know a guy who comes to the state for 4 months work hard save about $8000 and go back spend it.

its possible to go back

Shukran Adam and inchallah you and your wife will have a great life in the submission of Allah SWT.

Do you speak Moroccan very good?

Eh. Ana kan khadir Arabiya mazyan walakain ma kan kitibsh mazyan fi l'ordinateur elesh? wach kat fhamni?

ah kanfahmak mazyan. chkon 3almak l3arbiya babak ola rajlek ola jadak o jadatek?

Hi Kenza

I was just there four months last year. It is true that the time get longer as you stay, especially in the winter time. Ow, I love summer time in Morocco. However, with a job or business, it is great. Me, and my wife are definetly thinking about that, in the future though.

That's the thing though...in Morocco your either very rich with your own business or poor...the only motivation in me going there is to make a difference some how!

One of my wife condition to marry me was to go back to Morocco one day and raise our kids there, I agreed and I always wanted that. the main reason for that is to raise our kids based on Islam and Moroccan tradition, you grow up in the US and you know what happens to a lot of kids in high school( drugs, sex...) its not easy to raise kids in the US, Most of them have no respect for there parents, also think about the third generation and their kids. you are probably one of the lucky ones you were born and raise in the US and grow up as good Muslim, your father did a good job .

Its not easy to go back to Morocco, espestialy for you because your US is you home and you parents probably still live in the US verces you hubby's parents. if you love your husband you will be happy with him any where he goes. If he ask you this again tell him I will go to the moon with you if you decided so! what ever makes you happy!!

one more thing lets not jump to conclusion after he come over her he may change his mind like your dad

Shukran Adam and inchallah you and your wife will have a great life in the submission of Allah SWT.

Do you speak Moroccan very good?

Obama's father was Muslim, I think that's probaly affecting himlittle bit.

How so?

that shouldnt have anything to do with it considering he supposedly a christian.

Does the president of USA have to be Christian by the constitution? Does USA protect freedom of religion?

Do you think a Christian president will do better then a Muslim or a Jewish...president?

When Tomas Jefferson wrote the constitution 90% of it was based and from the Holly Qoran( the book of Muslims). should we change the constitution since 90% off it came from Islam?

I'm very open minded when I deal with people I judge them based on there action not there fate.

lol...well I visited Morocco every summer to be with my grandparents and my hubby found me alhamdoliallah as I was still young at the time and he was only 19-young for Moroccans. anyways we kept in contact and I visited every year and even though we wanted to get married when I was 16, I had to wait until I was 18 because of my parents. Now alhamdolillah our relationship is stronger than ever! and yes that's one reason he chose me - my old fashion qualities and desires in life

I'm sure both of u made the right decision, and which u both a happy marriage and life.