Emily2905

For more context around the situation, at first I wasn’t even considering America, he was going to live here because I am in the benefit group that has no capacity for work and I am also a carer for my father. The rules are a bit weird here, but if you claim carers allowance and get over a certain amount of money generally a month, you can apply for a marriage visa. I thought that these benefits would add up, but because I’m already in receipt of the highest amount, they don’t, which stops me from being able to apply to get married here since I just don’t have the money. So basically my whole plan shattered before my eyes a few days ago and I’m just trying to explore our options, because I can’t give up on being with who I feel is the love of my life. Working would be a very very big ask for my boyfriend, he has bpd, but if it’s the only possibility then he may try his hardest to be able to do something. And I know that people are going to say the two of us are no fit parents, but it’s the only thing either of us have ever really wanted, so if there had been a way for us to be together through that then it would have been ideal, but I’ve got the hope of England still allowing us. Anyway, again thank you for your advice

Thank you, I appreciate that as it was getting to me and not in the way they may have intended

So is basically my best plan if I wanted to go there is to try and talk him into working? Might be a huge ask for him mentally but if it’s the only real option it’s the only real option. That and have someone support us too

Okay, thank you for your advice everyone

Hi, I’m new to this forum. I live in England and my boyfriend lives in America, we are wanting to get married at some point in the future but since we’re both on benefits in our respective countries it seems to me to almost feel impossible at the moment, my last hope really is this rule in the uk, since we both very much want children: ‘If you do not meet these requirements you may still be able to apply for a visa or extend your permission to stay if: you have a child in the UK who is a British or Irish citizen or has lived in the UK for 7 years and it would be unreasonable for them to leave the UK there would be very significant difficulties for you and your partner that could not be overcome if you lived together as a couple outside the UK it would breach your human rights to stop you coming to the UK or make you leave’ My question is: are there any similar rules for the US if we have a child together? Thank you in advance