Just Kelley

Thanks for your replies, guys

Yeah, I was thinking the same thing - eh well, nothing ventured, nothing gained!

JFH, he's never lived away from his family and he's nervous (understandable). When he comes here, it'll be a while before he sees everyone he's literally seen every day of his life so far. So why don't I live there? I've got a great career here in Chicago that I love. In the first couple of years, it was much, much harder to say "ate breve" (see you soon) than it is now.

Hi all. I don't post often so here's a brief history: I'm a US citizen, my husband is Brazilian. We met in 2011, have traveled together, and married in Brazil in 2015 (wedding date was done by proxy; I've since been back to Brazil twice). I've visited his family many times and we'd love for him to meet mine in person. Before we were married, he was denied a tourist visa because he didn't sufficiently prove his ties to his home country - and I understand being married to me now doesn't improve his chances

My question: I live and work in the USA. He still lives in Brazil. I visit three or so times per year. He's not ready to just move here without visiting first (logical in my opinion). Is there any way to improve his chance of getting a tourist visa this time around? He doesn't live anywhere near a consulate so it's a major journey to have an interview. We're not feeling frantic; we'd just like to know if there's a path of least resistance for the direction we'd ideally like to go.

Thanks for any help in advance.

That's exactly what I was wondering - thanks so much!

Hi all,

My husband and I have been a couple for just under four years (married just two months!), living in separate countries (he's in Brazil and I'm in Chicago). He's never been to the USA but I've been to Brazil several times and we've traveled to Europe together. In 2014, we decided to get married and, since we hope to live together in the USA, he asked if we could marry in Brazil. It seemed like a reasonable request so I agreed.

Neither of us had any idea what a long process it is to marry in Brazil. We ultimately had to have the official paper signing done with a proxy (his mom graciously did the honor). I was in Brazil for the initial filing and met with the cartorio. From start to finish, though, one would have to be in Brazil for about three months solid for a standard Brazilian wedding and, because of my work, I simply don't have that kind of free time. So we went the proxy route, which involved a lot of leg work getting everything certified THEN notarized THEN legalized, and THEN translated - all requirements in Brazil before a judge grants you permission to marry. But we got it done, the judge approved our application and I waited here on pins and needles while my husband, his mom, and the witnesses (all wonderful people whom I've had the pleasure of getting to know in person during my visits with my husband's family) walked over to the judge's chamber to sign the papers. I've just returned to Chicago after our visit to consummate our marriage (not sure how to verify that but there's a stamp in my passport that says I was there after our wedding date and I have photos of myself with him and with his family, plus my flight boarding pass of course).

I've read some other posts on the subject of filing after a proxy marriage so I get the "it's going to take you longer" gist. No worries - we've been LDR this long; a while longer is no problem for us. Is there anything specific I can include in the packet that will help confirm the authenticity of our marriage? I've got tickets, passport stamps, wedding certificate, birth certificates, photos, letters from friends who know both of us, including family and non-family. Also, we have cards, letters, etc. All spanning back to 2011.

I'd love to hear advice from couples who've had successful interviews post proxy wedding. Thanks in advance!

Yeesh. I get frustrated when the US interviewers are sticklers.......... and then I read a post like this. As several others have pointed out, your marriage to the man in Beirut isn't legal. Second, if you HATE long distance, as you mentioned in your original post, this probably isn't the relationship for you. International relationships are long-term, long-distance relationships. That's just how it goes. It sounds like you have a lot of instability and drama... it's none of our business but since you asked, my advice would be option 3. And then to work on your own life by yourself before jumping into another relationship.

Second update: all is well and going swimmingly!

Although we were frustrated about the whole visa denial for no good reason thing, Italy gave us some perspective and the main thing is we really do want to spend our lives together. We decided not to rush it simply because the US government is being a pain. So, after our trip to Europe, I visited him in his hometown and met his family (love them!); since then, he has officially proposed and I have officially said yes. We'll marry in Brazil in December then apply for him to immigrate to the US as my husband. We've invested three years in this relationship and whatever it takes, we're prepared to get it done, no matter how long it takes to make our day-to-day life together happen.

So my boyfriend (Brazilian) tried to come to the USA over the holidays and his visa request was denied due to the interviewer not being satisfied that he'd provided enough ties to prove he'd be returning to his home after the new year. He brought his proof of property ownership (he owns 3 apartments), his bank account info, and his hotel reservation information/purchased round trip airline ticket reservation. He's self employed so he doesn't have a typical pay check.

No worries - we decided to spend the holidays in Europe instead and had a wonderful time. Flash forward to now: we're engaged, very happy, and preparing to celebrate our engagement in Punta Cana in May!

But we're not at all sure what's the best immigration application for us, moving forward: the CR1 or the K1. Ideally, we'd prefer to marry in his country in a small wedding with his family and then return to the USA for a post-wedding party with my family. Is this even an option? For now, living in the USA is necessary. I own a business and my presence is needed here but, even if we have to have a long distance marriage for a while, we're committed to making it work. We've been in a long distance relationship for more than two years - we'll just travel the world together until the USA powers that be say we both can live here in Chicago, lol!

Additional questions: is the fact that I've been married before an issue? I've been divorced for 4 years (my now-ex-husband left me in 2007 in pursuit of the daughter of a friend of mine). We also wondered if our age gap (I'm more than 10 years older but we're both over 25) is of concern.

Thanks for any relevant wisdom anyone can share!

And you know what in the grand picture thats all that matters. Time together. I am so jelous. Sounds magical. Good for you.

Thank you so much - that's exactly what it was...magical! He'd never seen snow before so we decided to stay in northern Italy and take a day trip to the alps. His reaction was priceless!

Update: since my boyfriend's tourist visa was denied, we decided to spend the holidays in Europe instead, specifically Italy - we had an amazing time! The only annoying thing was that we'd have preferred to put the money into the USA's economy and I'd have loved to show him some of the terrific sights here but hey, can't complain about a wonderful holiday overseas in the alps!

Lol what? The Denial rate from Brazil is so low that they are in line to become part of the VWP. Last year's denial rate was 3.2% That means nearly 97% get approved. http://www.travel.state.gov/pdf/FY12.pdf

On the whole, this is true; however, if you break it down by demographics, the denial rate for unmarried 20-somethings with no children is quite high.

If your boyfriend can't get a visa to the US, and you don't want to go the commitment visa route, why not meet somewhere in the middle, where visa requirements are less stringent? There are plenty of other countries in South America that would make a nice holiday point and would be building evidence that you are both committed enough to the relationship to travel for each other.

The most important thing is to keep all the evidence of your meeting for the future application. Think carefully about which of you has the more "portable" career or income generating business and decide where you want to set up home accordingly.

On the subject of an immigration lawyer - you seem like a very literate woman and you've mentioned that there aren't any problematic behaviours in your boyfriend's past (drugs, criminality) so you should be fine to complete the forms and compile the evidence yourself. 1. it's cheaper 2. you maintain control over the process at all times 3. why pay someone to fill in the forms that they have to ask you all the information for? Seems like a no-brainer.

Best of luck to you.

Thanks so much for your thoughts on the topic and for the kind wishes! We're pretty sure we're fine with simply moving forward - we just had a sort of a knee-jerk reaction to his being denied entry since me going there has never been a problem. I did call my attorney (long time friend) and his advice is for my boyfriend to buy a ring, get on one knee, propose, and make sure someone takes pictures the next time in in Brazil.

A travel agent is not the best person from whom to seek visa advice....as I pointed out earlier, likely when some key questions were asked, your BF gave an answer (or a delayed answer) that might have given the appearance of evasiveness....and that combined with his age, etc, would have tipped the balance against him (given that our laws presume immigrant intent from the outset). As far as our government somehow being in control of your lives, well, our law is clear regarding tourist visas....the reasons for coming to the US are not nearly as important as the reasons an applicant has for returning to their own country....what other plans, etc, that might be disrupted due to a denial are not relevant.

At some point in the discussion do you intend to post something relevant to this topic or are you simply interested in sharing unimportant and irrelevant information so you can "be right?" Given your contributions thus far, I'm going to guess it's the latter.

The denial rate for tourist visas from Brazil is very high. I have heard that perhaps as many as 90% are denied. You really have to show strong ties which would bring him back to Brazil - e.g. owning a car, owning a home, large bank balance, long term stable and good job. It is very tough and it does not help that often the US and Brazil do not always have the best relationship. However, being denied a tourist visa would have absolutely no impact on a K-1 or CR-1 approval.

In those types of visas the primary evaluation regards the nature of your relationship. You have to prove that you have a bona fide relationship as finance or as a spouse. They just look at different things. You will just have to go to Brazil a lot and do the Skype thing. Make sure you save just about anything that will help you ultimately prove a serious relationship and I mean save EVERYTHING!

Unfortunately K-1 and CR-1 visas really are not meant for the period of time you are just deciding you want to take it to the next level, you should be at that level when you apply for either one of them.

Good luck and we wish you well.

Obrigada, BruceHill!

Actually thank you to ALL of you who have posted encouraging comments - your words and wisdom are gratefully received!

My boyfriend said prior to his interview, he spoke with someone who owns a travel agency who absolutely advised him not to volunteer information that he was coming to visit me unless they specifically asked (they didn't ask). Afterward, we researched others' experiences and it seems to be as you said: a very high percentage of Brasileiros are denied tourist visas, especially if they're in their 20s and unmarried, even if they own property and have money in the bank.

We've saved everything snail mail that we've sent each other (including the envelopes with postage dates). We also have two years of Skype conversation transcripts if they need it

He was bothering me like this in my thread. Now seeing him do the same here I realize he's a troll, or even a border control officer on his lunch break.

To your original questions:

I'm assuming your BF was asked the nature of his trip, who he was staying with and an address? How did he respond to that?

Rhettvoe is likely a troll but he makes a valid point about concealing the fact he's visiting his GF might have made him sound suspicious.

Also, I understand what you're saying about the system is "manipulating" you in a sense. You was quite happy to visit each other without the thought of wedding bells. Now he's denied entry as a tourist, you have to consider marriage and fiance visas to get him here.

It kinda sucks and I'm in the same boat, but the K-1 should be no problem for you both (asides the wait and cost)

YES!! THIS!! Exactly!! (Thank you!)

That's exactly what I meant about feeling manipulated - we were perfectly content to just let our relationship progress naturally but now we feel, if we want him to enjoy time here with me, our only option is to expedite things.

To be honest, I stayed somewhat out of his tourist visa application. Whether it's correct or incorrect, our thinking was the less involved I was in the whole thing, the less likely they'd be to reject his application - eh well, moving along to plan B...

You are not that lucky.

How worrisome for folks who are easily intimidated

Likely when he was asked who he planned to visit, he may have replied in a manner that gave the CO pause, or answered with something illogical, both of which would have interpreted as either being evasive, which then translates into a lack of credibility. Apparently you suggested he not mention you nor your ongoing relationship, but in the act of trying to conceal that information, he probably stumbled a bit

Do you always make sweeping assumptions about people you don't know or am I just lucky?

It's a suggestion:

Why not thinking about the CR1 also instead of the K1.

With the CR1, he will reveive his green card just after coming in USA, for the K1, he will have to wait some months before being able to travel (after his Advance of Parole).

I think that for his business, it will be easier for him to travel, if something happens.

Just my 2 cents.

Good luck whatever way.

I didn't even know that was an option to consider - thanks so much, I'll add that to our list of options to research!

Also, Yang Ja, thank you for your helpful reply!

(Since a few have asked, there is absolutely no criminal activity or past immigration issues in his history. The interviewer simply told him he didn't sufficiently prove ties to his home country.)

If your goal is to be married and live in the US, then you're on the right track with either the K-1 or IR/CR-1. Currently the IR/CR-1 folks are experiencing much longer than normal wait times, over a year in a lot of cases, so a K-1 might be a quicker way for the two of you to be together. You can read through the guides at the top of the page to compare both avenues and see which one works best for you.

Thanks, Teddy! No huge rush but yes, that's our goal. Any thoughts/advice on going with an immigration attorney?

Just curious how the government is manipulating you?

Sorry, not interested in idle chatter. So far, none of these comments are relevant to my questions. If anyone who's been in a similar position has any helpful advice about how they worked through obstacles together, I'd really appreciate hearing some good tips. Thanks in advance

the rules for adjudication for a tourist visa

are totally different than

the rules for adjudication for a K-1 visa,

so, plan accordingly.

that's why I said "we know the K1 is an immigrant visa and not a non-immigrant visa."

My boyfriend is Brazilian. We've been a couple for two years and he's never been to the USA. We're seriously contemplating the steps to taking our relationship to the next level so he recently applied for a tourist visa to the USA. No great surprise that he was denied even though he didn't mention me (he's unmarried, no children, in his 20s and, because he's a property owner who generates his income from renting out the condos he owns, doesn't have a "typical" job that would indicate strong motivation to return to his home country) but it was still disappointing to get the official word.

Our original plan was to continue to date long distance, visiting back and forth before becoming engaged.

Since his visa was denied, I, of course, will just continue visiting him in Brazl, though we were both excited for me to be able to show him MY home for a change. Plan B is to expedite the "get engaged" part of our future and apply for the K1. We feel a little angry that we're being manipulated by the government for no reason that makes any sense to us. Eventually, we'd like to marry but we don't want to make any mistakes about how we go about everything and, now that he's been denied a tourist visa, we're a little worried that they'll deny a K1 visa too. I mean, we know the K1 is an immigratant visa and not the same as a non-immigrant visa but still we worry.

If all else fails, I'll just move there but we'll have to have a long distance/commuter marriage for several years as I own a successful business that requires too much of my time for me to manage it from another country.

My questions: does this sound like a viable Plan B and back up plan? am I overlooking anything? Is there anything else we can/should be considering?

Thanks in advance to all who reply

Really appreciate those suggestions, thanks! There are several colleges for music production in this city so I doubt setting up appointments to visit will be an issue and he's not on any sort of a tight deadline that I'm aware of so taking his time to prepare before setting up his interview shouldn't be any trouble whatsoever.

I love showing my city off to friends and once you get away from the tourist trap areas, it becomes quadruply amazing. I think he'd really enjoy experiencing some of our festivals (we have several to choose from every weekend all summer long) if he can make it here before Labor Day!

I'll pass on the well wishes to him the next time we chat - thanks again for the helpful tips, everyone!

I don't know why you think it will be hard. Brazil has a very high approval rate, so much so that they are teetering on becoming a Visa Waiver Program country, where people can visit the US with just a passport. Of course, a high approval rate is no guarantee, but I think you might have missed that somewhere.

Oh I really had no idea, Harpa, LOL! Neither of us knows much about international travel at all (although he did tell me he'd heard on the news that things are moving in that direction). I read some post here about some guy's mother in law who wants to come visit her daughter in the USA and she was rejected even though she has a husband and son in Brazil and has had a job at the same company for more than 30 years so I thought "woah, maybe it's a little more challenging than I thought!"

Gegal, that's very helpful info, thanks! Since I'm female and he's male, I wasn't sure if him staying with me would hinder his plans or not but if it's no big deal, then sure, why not save a couple thousand dollars? He has no idea if studying here would be condusive to his plans but checking out schools AND making it a visit to the place where his favourite music style was born just seemed like a great idea to him - which made sense to me - and, hey, there's a lot of cool stuff to see and do in Chicago so why not make a full holiday of it?

I wasn't sure if the bad stories of failed attempts at tourist visas here were typical for everyone who aren't from VWP countries or if this is the place people tend to go to to try to find answers if something goes wrong.

One question: I've read conflicting information at this site - some people have said that it's smart to book the flight prior to the visa interview and others have said that the interviewers sometimes consider that pretty nervy behaviour. What about having him book his appointments with the school advisors but hold off on booking the flight until he's approved? Maybe I'm a cheapskate but to me, the idea of booking a $2000 flight with the possibility of losing half of that money just sets my teeth on edge!

BlueBonnet, not sure if you read my post or not... as I mentioned, he doesn't have a pay stub or a mortgage. It's a family business and he lives with his mom (his father passed away) so I'm not sure what good bringing utility bills with her name on them would do.. He's a house music fan who wants to study music production and he's really keen on visiting Chicago, the birthplace of house music.He dreams of DJing at the big house music club in his town (evidently, famous DJs from around the world play there).

Boiler, that's his plan, I think. I was just asking for tips on how to convince the interviewers that he'll be coming home - it seems, from what I've read of other people's experiences, to be a pretty subjective process.