Shoot Em Straight

Just as long as he is not disappointed with the TRYING...

Happy 6 month anni! I had those days, too. I think the hardest was when we hit our one year anni and we were still waiting. Hopefully it won't be too much longer for you and the wait won't be too difficult to handle. I think the uncertainty of when it all will be over is the hardest.

Encouraging post...I only hope for everyone in the future to have similar blessings!!!

This post suddenly has many more errors than your others. There are more errors in this post, now that I mentioned errors, than in all your previous posts combined. You have been here two years by your statement and you were old enough to marry when you arrived, minimum age 18, far beyond the age which languages are easily learned. You seem to forget that my wife is an English teacher, specifically instructed not only in the language but in the science of teaching it. I proofread ALL of her writing for her Masters degree here and I did actually manage to learn some things about the theory of teaching language, not to mention common errors of a well educated native Russian speaker. Your statements are preposterous. NONE of your statements here are in agreement with any normally accepted teaching program or any expected results with the experience you suggest. Not even an ESL class? Seriously?
English is the most commonly taught foreign language in Russia, which is why Alla was an English teacher there also. Most Russians, particularly young people, have some fairly basic use of the language...you say you had NONE. Simply not plausible.
We would have liked to help you but you are not sincere. Good bye.

What I have come to realize here is that there is alot of hatred and jealousy about the MOD position.
I am sorry if I offended so many of you folks who are dying to be a MOD here but never say anything.
Just bcoz I inquire how to go about being mod doesn't make me a bad person.
If you want to become a mod then ridiculing others is not the way to go. Just speak up about your desire. No one will laugh at you.
Now everyone plz respect opinions of others.

Ohhhhhh when I was in Damascus...I seen old old olive trees and wondered how much history they might have seen!!!!
I have olive trees here in San Diego (just planted 2 years ago)...and have started to (pickle? brine?) the measly harvest. I was amazed I can do it myself...and how decent they tasted instead of store bought
Just cant get the pomegranates to grow to maturity?? Wife of Mahmoud??? Would you happen to know?
BTW it is really good to read about Jordan's Terrain or Neighboring Palestine I adore the middle east culture and envy those whom have been and seen.
These are success stories too.
Just why can I see photos of these wonderful places that members have taken??? If I google it is my search not your personal adventure...
edited for spelling planted as palented geek

I'm not sure what a "success story" is, but my husband and I are 11 years apart have been married for 2 1/2 years, and he's been here just under a year. We haven't had any problems to date and we communicate really well and talk to each other about everything. We haven't had any problems with our differences in age, and we don't even notice it. No one looks at us funny or strange, or asks questions, or anything, so maybe they don't notice the age difference either. He adjusted here without any problems, but I figured he would because he has a very easy-going personality and he "never" gets frustrated. Seriously....I have never known anyone that can be so positive all of the time. He's just a happy person and we are very happy together:) . The only thing he needs to and is working on is "time".....lol I'm sure you all know what I mean But he's working on it and getting better with it every day.

I'm 5'6 and Dh is 5'6 and a half (that's according to HIM)

Since I chose the word...I think it was directed to me...
Minthra....you entertain me and it is simply a quagmire that we are not best friends yet.... If you want to just add me as a friend Ill accept
I posted for the weight subject with palmtreegirl daring to write about her weight...where as I was chicken to even post of my height
and when i was writing i'd seen Tany's height on my screen (having posted right after her)...and made a comment. Wheeew.
Surely this is not a MENA issue that offended someone again??? But I will attempt to clear things up for the sake of reaching out ...I did say it is better to be nice and have to go by my own advice.
My husband speaks French and I am learning or attempting to...and the petite was meant as small.....I did not know Tany is over weight or under weight.... nor should it matter. Did not even look to other post's height...to compare what is petite or small or little in stature...whew.
explained.
You got a +1... the drama continues...please I wish not to be sucked into the banter or negativity. It's not worth being right or wrong on here. that goes for the one who LIKED your post
Maybe the translations of what we wish to convey on here get lost (missing the sounds and gestures) rather just typing words...Sarcasm, humor etc...other wise there is no way you need to pick on my words unless you want to be friends...hahahaha.
GF I am sending you a friend request right now...
you do make me laugh.
PS if you dont accept at least I have tried and publicly too That's the way I roll....
I wish you good thoughts

Ladies, I totally agree with your comments. Me n my husband pretty much are the same. We re devoted to each other and we spend our time loving on each other. We went thru too much to sit round thinking of the what ifs in life. I have never met man so wonderful, strong, passionate, loving, and protective s my husband is. From the moment we got engaged he has taken very good care of me. He is the provider and I take care of him and his needs wants and desires. I m not ashamed of that he is my greatest love. I have a dual degree in communications and english. Yet I choose to stay home and take care of my home and family. Even right now he is working. You can bet when he gets home I will be here smiling and hugging him and telling him how much I missed him while he was at work. The house will be clean, I will be smelling and looking fabulous. This doesn't men I m not a strong woman it means when it comes to my love I am soft and gentle. It is just the little things we do for one another. My husband works hard for us, so why shouldn't I show him my appreciation and love and respect? What I m saying I guess is that it is ok to enjoy being head over heels in love. Why is it ok for american couples that wed to have the blissful happy honeymoon period yet for us with foreign husbands God forbid we walk round with our heads in the clouds in love? We are said to be naive, no no no thank you sisters, I m not going to be made to feel bad for loving my husband with all that I have. So you shouldn't either. Enjoy your love and passion for each other. This world is so messed up so when we find love and happiness we should thank God and go bout living our lives in bliss. BTW.... I LOVE LOLLIPOPS N RAINBOWS N GUMDROPS N THE WORLD IS BEAUTIFUL LOOKING THRU MY ROSE COLORED GLaSSES FROM UP HERE IN THE CLOUDS. I also love being Suzy homemaker, it is where I m happiest and feel the most content. Now I m going to go jump in our pool at our home that my husband works so hard for us to have and enjoy.

I can relate to both of you Mimolicious and foreverwaiting(even though our age difference isn't much).......both of your husband's sound so much like mine....family is first and everyday he shows me and tells me he loves me in so many ways. He's very open and affectionate like me, we are very close emotionally, physically and know we both know how lucky we are to recognize that we found the right person in each other. He's always pleasant and happy to be around, even after a hard days work.
We didn't "settle" for each other in any way and we do not have any issues with each other. Of course, I wish he could stop smoking, but I know it's very hard. We get along so well in every situation, and if we do have an arguement, we never go to sleep mad and he's always the first to try to make up.
Some may say that we haven't been married 5 years yet, so I can't possibly know what I'm talking about, but I know myself and my husband and our relationship, they don't. Those people don't beleive that it's possible for two people to be genuinely happy with each other and love each other, not pick fights with each other, not be jerks to each other and not annoy the hell out of each other every other day. I thank God I have a wonderful husband.
Just because we have great husbands and great relationships with them, doesn't mean we have rose colored glasses on or have our head in the clouds. Actually, it's just the opposite...since we are a little older now, we have learned our past lessons in relationships and have learned to choose wisely .
Enjoy your husbands and your life together

Loving my husband doesn't mean I lose my identity. If that is what anyone thinks, then they don't know one ounce of who I am. And I'm not surprised someone has tried to derail the positive flow

well said mimolicious and being newylyweds doesn't make us naive or unrealistic, either. Just because there have been tragic sad stories here, doesn't mean that each one of us is doomed to be another statistic. Some people just don't like it when other people are happy and positive.

Yes the whole thing could be entirely different if the MENA is an import and only by reading on here did I learn this. Never did that equation come up in my personal life with the first marriage.
Not a warm fuzzy posting gave me this info so I see your point and respect it
I do appreciate all the advice on here.
Just HAD to suggest for anyone and everyone... less cattiness will go much further. I only speak for my self and how it is a turn off when reading jabs (that are not even toward me) in what started as possibly as a good info thread goes to the usual "b**tch catfight" between the incoming 9th graders and the graduated "seniors" (high school sense not age )
It was not only in this current post. So maybe I see "straight talking" completely different from another persons view, But from the noob side or even the Philippines forum (random)smart ladies, your company included, know when it turns ugly it loses its flavor. Your good intentions get LOST.
There is enough drama in the OFF Topic to entertain people.
Not searching for warm fuzzies...
but here might be one.
Postscript....having read the recent posts on the topics you and the "grads" wrote with all the "craziness subjects" I missed in your past on VJ ..... I even appreciate MORE the fact the "experienced" ladies are still posting...and not given up the aid. Thank you for the
Sylvia

I describe myself (and many others that know me) as a realist, with a positive outlook, and am overall very happy with life. In general, why does it seem when people have a positive outlook, they are looked upon as naive? I'm not considered a naive person, and know the challenges that are ahead for my marriage. I will be honest, I am filled with more anxiety about his arrival than happiness right now, but I know, when I see him at the airport, I will realize he is the same man that I've been in love with for almost 4 years. I personally think my husband will adjust well, but you never know. Maybe this is why my marriage is loved and accepted by all who know me...because they know my opinionated, in-your-face personality probably wouldn't sit well with a manipulating scammer out to screw me over, and that my husband loves these traits, as they make me who I am.
My husband doesn't smoke, drink, and is a practicing Muslim. He has been the breadwinner for his family since he was 21, and has been the "dad" ever since, because of his father's ailing health, and then his death almost 2 years ago. His respect for women is exceptional, and the way he treats me, his mom, grand mom, my mother and sisters is amazing. He is respected in his community, and is very hard working. He had been using our long immigration wait to further his studies, and has a list of what he wants to accomplish when he first gets here, and in our future. We look forward to building our life together, and having children. I know things may not all go as planned, but one thing I know about my husband, is that he is a man of his word. We have a great respect for each other, and I know he will continue to be a good husband and man once he gets here. Can you imagine, with his one job, he can support his family of 5, and live comfortably in Morocco. Here, at minimum, we will both have to work just to be able to support 3, never mind the extra amenities. He owns a house with a business underneath. I know my life would have been a bit more comfortable if I was able to move there with him, it just wasn't an option. I know of a few couples who don't post here anymore, that have had their husbands here over 2 years, and things are still going well. Maybe that is not long enough to call a success story, but I'm thinking they are on their way.
In the end, we all have a life to live, and we all learn from our mistakes, and try to make the best choices with what we know. Everyone here started at the same starting line, just at different times. I think that some forget that. I hope to never forget how it felt to be the newbie, and not knowing a thing about immigration, and how it felt to be denied, twice, and the feeling that just maybe, I would never be able to live with my husband in America. Yes, people get on each other's nerves, that is life. You won't get along with everyone. I also think that things get taken the wrong way a lot more often on message boards than they would in person. In the end, even though things get catty sometimes, most of the women here have great advice. I may not like someone, but if they make a good point, I'm with them.
On a side note, my husband is a very private person. He believes in the evil eye. Some people, for no reason, may just not like you, and will wish you harm or bad luck. I remember people telling me that my husband probably had a life I didn't know about, or some other secrets and that was why we got denied twice. In the end, it was just the fact that we moved fast, and they couldn't believe there was true love there. We proved them wrong. In all that time, we just grew stronger, and I love him more now than I ever did. As they say, the visa process is a piece of cake compared to the adjustment phase....if this is true for everyone, then I guess we are in for hell on earth

When I was waiting for my NOA2... I research everything so that as soon as NOA2 came--I had no questions and I was ready to move to the next step.
I am glad I got my NOA2 in less then 4 months cause if I would have had more time then I would have started studying the paperwork for citizenship.
While you are waiting for your case number or case to be transferred is probably a good time to start studying.
You do not have to fill out your timeline. If people ask you to and you have no intention of doing it then you might just fill it out with false info anyhow.
The timelines help us to help others
With others timelines we are able to tell people how long it takes a case to get assigned a nuber
how long it takes a case to reach the afganistan embassy
how long men are in AP from Afganistan
So, unfortunately we will never have many answers for people from certain countries that do not like to help others by sharing their info.
Good Luck

Congrats finish filling out your profile so you can be better helped so we will know the type of visa you are applying for.....

Perfect

If you are approaching me with your post...I only copied the OP original title and pasted...to bring it back to the subject of this thread before it took its turns.
So you will have to ask OP if she will still reply to you.
But my take on it...is "happy ending" is for the Visa Journey. I believe that is what all the ladies posting with active petitions are here for. I am not asking for anyone's take of happy endings but it couldnt hurt to have a few good ones written in the MENA forum....
Since I am contributing...I will add
I can read all the posts from the ladies that have been here longer and have seen more and still make a sound decision on what I agree with and dont agree with...
WITHOUT
the engaging in or accepting jabs from different personalities. The "experienced" ladies have seen, read, known and sparred with far more varied stories than my own and I respect that but ....the negativity and gang up that is mixed within that freely given knowledge is a complete turn off.
One's good message gets lost when it comes at a person like negative lecture, dismissal of the others opinion validity or personal jabs... discussion or offer of help is buried behind one ugly word.
I honestly have no judgement with either lady...and couldnt care less but,
The calling of ones stated belief in marriage/no divorce could have been disagreed with...WITHOUT the word #######. And then she really had a right to tell her that she finds her on a consistent basis harsh with your comments...
WITHOUT telling her to shut her yap.
Both comments were rude and unnecessary...it is just one began it and the other went for the throat. Then another zooms in from else where to back up the first...the like buttons are pushed...etc, same scenario different thread.
I met with the "experienced" ladies before on another thread and have my own conclusions and opinions about the way everyone posts...and sometimes I have need to restrain myself from really saying what I want to... not worth it.
I will say it is more productive to spread the news (good or bad) or share what we feel we HAVE to say in a more cohesive manner.
It is so invaluable that I found this site,
for all to share their minds and also come back to pay it forward.
If anything can be taken from my post it is hopefully this
It is really OK for everyone to be a nice person ...even secured behind the anonymity of a monitor.
little lightening humor...even when Beauty for Ashes takes over... I know I can still learn from somewhere in the off topic.
I was married to a MENA for plenty years and am married to another MENA.....I am not coming here a child not knowing of life...just need to kill time waiting for my NOA2, maybe help a friend or two and learn as much as I can to get my spouse here.
Ok Safi! Enough Kumbaya fireside talk from me.
Thanks for reading.

If you are approaching me with your post...I only copied the OP original title and pasted...to bring it back to the subject of this thread before it took its turns.
So you will have to ask OP if she will still reply to you.
But my take on it...is "happy ending" is for the Visa Journey. I believe that is what all the ladies posting with active petitions are here for. I am not asking for anyone's take of happy endings but it couldnt hurt to have a few good ones written in the MENA forum....
Since I am contributing...I will add
I can read all the posts from the ladies that have been here longer and have seen more and still make a sound decision on what I agree with and dont agree with...
WITHOUT
the engaging in or accepting jabs from different personalities. The "experienced" ladies have seen, read, known and sparred with far more varied stories than my own and I respect that but ....the negativity and gang up that is mixed within that freely given knowledge is a complete turn off.
One's good message gets lost when it comes at a person like negative lecture, dismissal of the others opinion validity or personal jabs... discussion or offer of help is buried behind one ugly word.
I honestly have no judgement with either lady...and couldnt care less but,
The calling of ones stated belief in marriage/no divorce could have been disagreed with...WITHOUT the word #######. And then she really had a right to tell her that she finds her on a consistent basis harsh with your comments...
WITHOUT telling her to shut her yap.
Both comments were rude and unnecessary...it is just one began it and the other went for the throat. Then another zooms in from else where to back up the first...the like buttons are pushed...etc, same scenario different thread.
I met with the "experienced" ladies before on another thread and have my own conclusions and opinions about the way everyone posts...and sometimes I have need to restrain myself from really saying what I want to... not worth it.
I will say it is more productive to spread the news (good or bad) or share what we feel we HAVE to say in a more cohesive manner.
It is so invaluable that I found this site,
for all to share their minds and also come back to pay it forward.
If anything can be taken from my post it is hopefully this
It is really OK for everyone to be a nice person ...even secured behind the anonymity of a monitor.
little lightening humor...even when Beauty for Ashes takes over... I know I can still learn from somewhere in the off topic.
I was married to a MENA for plenty years and am married to another MENA.....I am not coming here a child not knowing of life...just need to kill time waiting for my NOA2, maybe help a friend or two and learn as much as I can to get my spouse here.
Ok Safi! Enough Kumbaya fireside talk from me.
Thanks for reading.

If you are approaching me with your post...I only copied the OP original title and pasted...to bring it back to the subject of this thread before it took its turns.
So you will have to ask OP if she will still reply to you.
But my take on it...is "happy ending" is for the Visa Journey. I believe that is what all the ladies posting with active petitions are here for. I am not asking for anyone's take of happy endings but it couldnt hurt to have a few good ones written in the MENA forum....
Since I am contributing...I will add
I can read all the posts from the ladies that have been here longer and have seen more and still make a sound decision on what I agree with and dont agree with...
WITHOUT
the engaging in or accepting jabs from different personalities. The "experienced" ladies have seen, read, known and sparred with far more varied stories than my own and I respect that but ....the negativity and gang up that is mixed within that freely given knowledge is a complete turn off.
One's good message gets lost when it comes at a person like negative lecture, dismissal of the others opinion validity or personal jabs... discussion or offer of help is buried behind one ugly word.
I honestly have no judgement with either lady...and couldnt care less but,
The calling of ones stated belief in marriage/no divorce could have been disagreed with...WITHOUT the word #######. And then she really had a right to tell her that she finds her on a consistent basis harsh with your comments...
WITHOUT telling her to shut her yap.
Both comments were rude and unnecessary...it is just one began it and the other went for the throat. Then another zooms in from else where to back up the first...the like buttons are pushed...etc, same scenario different thread.
I met with the "experienced" ladies before on another thread and have my own conclusions and opinions about the way everyone posts...and sometimes I have need to restrain myself from really saying what I want to... not worth it.
I will say it is more productive to spread the news (good or bad) or share what we feel we HAVE to say in a more cohesive manner.
It is so invaluable that I found this site,
for all to share their minds and also come back to pay it forward.
If anything can be taken from my post it is hopefully this
It is really OK for everyone to be a nice person ...even secured behind the anonymity of a monitor.
little lightening humor...even when Beauty for Ashes takes over... I know I can still learn from somewhere in the off topic.
I was married to a MENA for plenty years and am married to another MENA.....I am not coming here a child not knowing of life...just need to kill time waiting for my NOA2, maybe help a friend or two and learn as much as I can to get my spouse here.
Ok Safi! Enough Kumbaya fireside talk from me.
Thanks for reading.

Posted 15 April 2012 - 03:34 PM
Just curious if anyone who has married a younger MENA man has a happy ending?........

I'm sorry Kat, but can we get back to the OP's topic, because it has turned into your story. You should start a thread about it, and that is where you can give us all updates. I'm sorry for your pain, but this topic was meant for success stories