Can I marry immediately in the US, or is the K1 correct way?

[JayJay 4]

And having just seen your post, I would suggest you have a talk with the mother. While it is a good thing to not ignore her, it is also rather important that you don't kick off this marriage on someone else's advice..or not advice, if you see what I mean.

Go follow your own heart. Mom might not go as nuts as you think, and after all, as you said, her daughter IS 34. Keep the lines of communication open but please, whatever you do - remember that your marriage is two in a bed, not three in a bed! Neither of you are 12 and if you're considering marriage, you are grown up enough to decide when that shoudl be. I'd personally be respectful to Mom, take into account what she is saying but definately follow your own instincts on this one. Choosing to be apart at a time like this could be an interesting choice in heindsight, if you see what I mean...

What does your future wife think?

[athena_ny 1]

aAain, thanks for your replies, its nice to have this support, it means a lot to me

okay, so more questions, after having talked it through with my lady

If we get married now, her mother will go nuts. most likely excommunicate her directly. Her mother wants us to wait until she's out of rehab before we do anything, whatsoever, at all. Which I suppose is kind of sensible mother advice, even though the girl in question is 34... and given that her mother has done a lot for her during this whole DUI/rehab process, annoying the mother would be very ungracious

My question is this: Would another, more sensible option be that we file now for K1? If we kick the process off while she's still in rehab then the first 3.5 months of the wait will be mitigated by the fact that we can't be with other anyway. leaving only X months of horrible torture, where X can be anything that an enlightened government wishes it to be...

IF we went this route - filing K1 now, then me heading back to the UK at end of April - would she be able to visit me in the UK when she gets out of rehab in August? would I be able to visit her? or are all visiting rights terminated until I get the K1 and fly over? Would it be best to not file anything until i'm physically back in the UK?

thanks for putting up with this drama

she could definitely visit you so long as they let her in (which I don't see why they wouldn't), and you ideally could visit her but sometimes with a K1 in the works, it's a little harder to convince the officer at the POE that you don't intend on staying.

You could file and leave when your permission is up, then try to return in August and hopefully get your interview in that time, return to England for the interview, then return when you get the K1. There's no way of telling how speedy the process will or won't be.

Or you could overstay the visa and marry in August anyway. Which, I'm not so sure I recommend, contending with an overstay will make you nervous even if the consequences aren't that dire. It's up to you and what you're comfortable with. (I'll get attacked for offering this as an option, but oh well. It is a viable option and while not preferred, still an option.)

K1 is a headache, which would be why TimsDaisy etc are advising if you can marry now, do it.

It doesn't really matter where it's filed from - the advantage to, if you decide to go the K1 route, filing from the US is it gets the ball rolling a bit faster since if you wait until August, that's 4 extra months. It takes some time to get the paperwork together but honestly, if you read the guides and have half a brain, it's not rocket science. I'm not 100% familiar w/ the K1 paperwork, but some of it is similar to the AOS stuff and there's guides all over the site for all marriage based visas, and adjustment of status ppw.

The decision is ultimately yours. While I agree that not upsetting the mother is a good idea (my mother was upset enough, just getting married before she wanted me to wouldn't have gone over well, so I understand) there's a lot to contend w/ when immigration is involved.

btw: why are you traveling on a B-2 instead of under the visa waiver program (VWP)?

I presume you're on a B2 because of business?

A B-2 is the tourist half of the B visa, and the OP hasn't yet answered this.

VWP-eligible people who have a B visa usually have a good reason for it. I wonder if the good reason might not wind up being another item in their case for them to investigate with a lawyer. ie, if he holds it due to a conviction or other immigration problem in his past, that will have an impact on today's case.

Why hasn't anyone suggested that he work all this out with a lawyer, in a consult. There's enough misunderstanding in this thread to make it worthwhile.

Lawyer is always a good idea. I never suggest it myself because usually 4 million other people have. I missed that one this time.

PS - don't leave rocks on the pavement?

[athena_ny 1]

Okay I suppose I can tell you how mine went - it might not go EXACTLY the same way for you, but here goes:

I arrived in may of 2005 and he proposed in June...then, we decided to get married and did it on a week's notice on the 16th of August! (Hurrah!) Anyway, we called USCIS etc and were told it was okay to apply for a PR card from here - so then we had to wait for a medical date, as the lady on the 'phone told us it would be best to wait and get all the paperwork together at once to avoid any RFE's. We did this, which emant I was out of status for about 30 days or so before the medical - which was fine, as far as USCIS were concerned - they were more worried about me hitting the six month mark.

I had my medical, which was an ABSOLUTE RIP OFF! Ha - seriously - a rip off. Had some dude from the Mankato Clinic here in mankato look down my throat, listen to my heartbeat (which the nurse had already done...) and then shoot me full of vaccinations and give me a heef test. Very pleasant, and the vast amount of intraveinous cr@p floating around in my body afterward made me feel rather ill for the remainder of the day... The charged through teh nose for it (typical, as it happens as these places are unregulated by the USCIS) - $585!!! Luckily for you, that's a staggering amount for a simple Immigration medical and I've never heard of anyone else being charged that much. I'm still paying my MIL back to this day...poor woman!

So we got our paperwork together. I obtained my birth certificate and one for Ben from Germany, where he was born, and we gathered evidence of his ability to sponsor me, along with a co-sponser - his Mom. We actually got the fees for the whole of the paperwork waived, as we were too poor at the time to afford to pay them - to do this, you have to have genuine hardship and submit evidence along with a cover letter (preferably from both of you) as to why the fees would be impossible to pay. We were blessed - our fees were waived. And so we went on.

The paperwork was sent off to Chicago at the end of September 2005, and I had my NOA1 by October 4th. My biometrics appointment was on December 12th in Minneapolis, and it took ten minutes - in and out. Very simple, and I even met someone from VisaJourney there! I had my work permit in hand by December 27th and a SS number by the beginning on January. I started my first job on January 30th and soon after that we had our interview - March 29th of 2006.

I never did apply for AP because we were too poor to go anywhere! But I could have.

We went to the interview on the 29th of March in St Paul, and after a wait we went in and the whole interview took about twenty minutes. We had a very pleasant young woman interviewing us, and she was very thorough. ben even had to count back the years to figure out which year I was born (embarrassing!) and got my two middle names wrong (again, embarrassing!) but she just laughed - it wasn't so bad, and we were free in that we were able to honestly answer everything she asked of us. My passport was stamped, and we trotted out of there like young colts in the spring, and straight to Olive Garden, where we proceeded to stuff our faces

In the end, the way we got through it was this: We submitted photographs, but not excessive "evidence" - just important, non-frou-frou evidence of a genuine relationship; we read and re-read and re-read the instructions on teh forms and filled out several about ten times to make sure we had them right; we kept copies of everything we sent; we kept in touch with USCIS with our questions and sometimes called two or three times to reach different people and compare their opinions to one another's (get a third opinion!); we did not panic!

Anyway hope that helps! Main thing is to not lie, be completely genuine at all times, and use the helpline they give you - even if you have to remain on hold for about 65,000 hours at a time! Ooh - and as I was saying - call the line multiple times if you're unsire of someone's answer, as that tends to be the best way to get a clear consensus if what's needed.

Alright, I've said my piece - now I am going to take a bath!

We have a whole binder of evidence a lot of letters from before I moved to be w/ him and card, etc after - I think it's a lot until I read about someone who had THREE binders of evidence (and that's why they were convinced they got approved - swear to God, I think I read it on here today)

[meauxna 15]

Lawyer is always a good idea. I never suggest it myself because usually 4 million other people have. I missed that one this time.

PS - don't leave rocks on the pavement?

Also always a good idea.

[TimsDaisy 0]

Your idea to start the K1 while you're here is a good one, if that works out best for everyone's interests. Just keep thinking about things before you do anything - since you have a bit of time to work with.

I think the idea of sitting down to talk with your future mother-in-law is a great one. All 3 of you should understand the process - the legal and the practical aspects of it - before you decid anything for certain. If it helps, you may want to begin to separate a "wedding" and a "legal marriage contract" in your mind. A LOT of us here have to go through two steps - the legal marriage, and then the big, cultural celebration we call a wedding - because of the (unrealistic) timelines forced on us by the government, combined with the practicalities of planning an American wedding. That might help the mom if her concerns are over that sort of thing. Of course, if she's worried about her daughter making life-altering decisions while in rehab, that's another story.

And, from what I understand, people entering rehab (or undergoing programs like AA) are advised to not even date, let alone marry, because there is so much important work to do for themselves before they add another person. BUT - that's something for you and your future and current family to discuss. Just guessing about the mom's perspective.

As mentioned, your B2 visa method of entering - is that because of past troubles with US immigration? Or did you just want to stay longer? If you have no past troubles to worry about, and your B2 will still be valid, you can quite likely easily visit your girl during the K1 process. You'll need to bring proof of ties to your home country (TONS of information on that around these boards, but that means stuff like a mortgage or lease, a letter from your employer saying you're expected back on x date, evidence of money to support yourself, etc), but lots and lots of people here fly back and forth for visits without a problem.

(not all. mine can't come here.)

You have a very complex situation, but while others have recommended an attorney, I think - based solely on the information you've given us, and assuming there are no other really important details, like trouble with US immigration in the past - that you don't need an attorney so much as the counsel of your woman's family, your woman, your own family, and whatever professionals are helping your gal during this difficult time for her. You don't want to rush the marriage if it's bad for her recovery. But you don't want to sacrifice a good chance to avoid the K1 process without understanding that decision either.

[tom_g 3]

btw: why are you traveling on a B-2 instead of under the visa waiver program (VWP)?

I presume you're on a B2 because of business?

A B-2 is the tourist half of the B visa, and the OP hasn't yet answered this.

VWP-eligible people who have a B visa usually have a good reason for it. I wonder if the good reason might not wind up being another item in their case for them to investigate with a lawyer. ie, if he holds it due to a conviction or other immigration problem in his past, that will have an impact on today's case.

Why hasn't anyone suggested that he work all this out with a lawyer, in a consult. There's enough misunderstanding in this thread to make it worthwhile.

Sorry, meant to say... I'm here on a B2 because I wanted to stay more than 90 days. I'm basically living in Tahoe for the whole winter improving my meagre snowboarding skills

No prior convictions, no prior immigration problems, no backruptcies, not even any points on my license

Talking it through with a lawyer would be very wise, and I do intend to do just that. The problem is that it costs money - a resource that gets drained during a winter not working. I'm currently getting as much information as I can, plus a range of experiences from people who've been through it, so that when I finally sit down with a lawyer its not all just going to go over my head and be wasted

thanks, JayJay, for your story.

[JayJay 4]

No problem I'm sure everything will be fine for you in the end, no matter what you choose

P.S. Good point meaxuna - I dunno - I just see the "B" there and assume Business - my bad! I was told once that it's a lot harder to get a B visa if you have the option of going on the VWP - I think I might have gone on a B visa as well if I hadn't been told that, just to stay longer. Ah well - it's all water under the bridge now, with my hubby, dog, house and four cats, I can say I am here to stay *grins*

[KenKing 0]

It's ironic that while you have to show proof that you will return to your home country when you enter the US on a B2 visa, that you can apply for AOS with the same B2 visa. So all the "proof of strong ties" and "commitment to return to the home country" is all overlooked at the time of the AOS? hehe...

oh well, I'm still contemplating on which route to go with my significant other. Her B2 visa interview is in 2 weeks, and she will travel to the US with me in mid-May 2007. But we both will be returning to China after that trip. But, I think I will leave China for good, at the end of July. And assuming she gets her B2, takes a trip to the US in May, will she have problems entering the US on the same B2 visa in July (citing the short period between the 2 trips). I may just ask her to marry me on the 2nd trip....

Or, there won't be a second trip for her and I'll start the process of the K1 visa when I return to the US in mid-May. I will still return to the US in July, permanently. we'll see how everything falls into place.

The B2, then AOS method sure saves ALOT of pain, trouble + money.

[TimsDaisy 0]

KenKing - I think you're skipping a few steps in your analysis there. B2 then AOS is technically okay because, when done legally, you didn't enter INTENDING to marry - but the law does recognize that these things happen, people fall in love, etc.

JayJay - getting a B2 isn't *harder* per se for those who can use the VWP, it's just that getting a B2 generally is abit of a pain in the #######. My fiance came here for basically the exact same purpose and durating as the OP here. He and his mates decided to spend a season boarding and they arranged to take the time off. This means leaving jobs and for some of them, selling off houses, etc. So you see the obvious problems when they show up at the Embassy! They had a lot of fast talking to do, because they didn't even realize that what they did to prepare to leave made it look like they weren't planning on going back.

Many/most tourists to the US can use the VWP, so they never have to worry about the proof-of-ties issue because their ties are presumed under the program. If you lose the ability to use the VWP, as happened to my fiance, then you "simply" (harhar) have to get a visa like everyone else in the world without access to the VWP. But then you have all the evidence to show, pitfalls, etc.

As you can imagine, B2 visas are going to be less frequently sought in countries with the VWP in place - because most people will use that and be fine.

So it's a faux sort of harder process. Not harder than it is generally, just less frequently faced by most would-be tourists (and most Brits).

[athena_ny 1]

It's ironic that while you have to show proof that you will return to your home country when you enter the US on a B2 visa, that you can apply for AOS with the same B2 visa. So all the "proof of strong ties" and "commitment to return to the home country" is all overlooked at the time of the AOS? hehe...

oh well, I'm still contemplating on which route to go with my significant other. Her B2 visa interview is in 2 weeks, and she will travel to the US with me in mid-May 2007. But we both will be returning to China after that trip. But, I think I will leave China for good, at the end of July. And assuming she gets her B2, takes a trip to the US in May, will she have problems entering the US on the same B2 visa in July (citing the short period between the 2 trips). I may just ask her to marry me on the 2nd trip....

Or, there won't be a second trip for her and I'll start the process of the K1 visa when I return to the US in mid-May. I will still return to the US in July, permanently. we'll see how everything falls into place.

The B2, then AOS method sure saves ALOT of pain, trouble + money.

While I guess if she's not aware of the proposal/marriage before entering the second time, it's okay...but it's a very thin line, at the same time.

[tom_g 3]

hello again

one more question...

There is a section on the I-128F regarding the IMBRA that says under some circumstances, charges and dispositions relating to crimes must be submitted. One of the specific conditions is "crimes relating to a conrolled substance or alcohol on three or more occasions, and such crimes dit not arise from a single act"

I'm guessing that the three DUIs that she has count as three such alcohol related crimes, does she have to include the charges and dispositions of all three DUIs? they are going to be hard to find, the earlier two were years ago

might well have to speak with a lawyer about this. just wondering if anyone has any experience?

thanks

Tom

[tom_g 3]

Seems I asked this question a tad prematurely. I've found most of the information that I need.

She has to include the court and police records for the three DUIs. No idea how to actually get this information, I assume her lawyer will know. I further assume that although the first DIU was over ten years ago, and is now officially off her record, she still has to include details of it...

It doesn't look as though the IMBRA stuff will actually stop the application, its only there for my protection. I feel all warm and safe now

[JayJay 4]

Oooh no not to worry abot any of that

DUI's fall under three categories, depending on the severity of the offence, the amount of alcohol found in her system at the time of arrest and whether it's the first, second, third or 56th time (heh...let's hope nobody gets to that stage!) they've been arrested for it. Other factors come into play as well, such as refusing to take a breathalyser, being "silly" with the p'liceman etc etc.

Basically what you're left with are three levels of crime: misdemenour; gross misdemenour and felony. It's the felonies you really need to worry about - and if her third one was over ten years ago, I expect she's been charged with a gross misdemenour - am I right? Had it been less than ten years ago (the laws for that changed in 2001, but all subseqent arrests were still counted back ten years - bit of a bummer if you'd had one in '96 and had been expecting it to be gone!) it may well have resulted in a felonious charge, which would go on a criminal record permanently and would be much more "bad", if you see what I mean. It probably would also have meant she would have been classified as a habitual alcoholically impaired driver. I think she may have jumped over that one - and that's a good thing, because if she's now getting help, this might never have to happen again.

I am surprised actually, that a DUI would fall into IMBRA at all - unless it were a felony. I would definately ask her lawyer as well, only because of the differing natures of certain DUI's and how and why they enter someone's criminal record.

You and I are learning this together though, buddy - since I had to get clued up about it because of my husband! Just think, if we were back in England, and tried to get into our cars as a matter of course after a night of heavy drinking, our friends would look at us as though we were aliens and ask us what the h$ll we thought we were doing. Funny that in so many cases over here, everyone simply does get into their SUV's and cars at 1am and just...drive off. I mean honestly, back in Blighty the cops would just pull everyone over on probable cause (they'd find some way to do it, i'm sure...), breathalyse them and it would be game over. I live in a town where the cops don't pull you over even if you stagger out of the bar, puke on the pavement, pee against your friend's leg thinking he's a wall, then get into your car... Funny culture sometimes, I think.,

Anyway enough waffling - let us know what happens with all of this - and have a great weekend!

[dora_david 0]

WHYYYYY, WHYYY DID I LEAVE B4 GETTING MARRIED

dang..me too

[Yodrak 8]

KenKing,

No, it's not overlooked. While many people successfully adjust status after entering as a visitor, some get badly burned.

Yodrak

It's ironic that while you have to show proof that you will return to your home country when you enter the US on a B2 visa, that you can apply for AOS with the same B2 visa. So all the "proof of strong ties" and "commitment to return to the home country" is all overlooked at the time of the AOS? hehe...

.....

Edited April 16, 2007 by Yodrak