Moving to Pennsylvania

[Lavender7 32]

Hello dear VJ community

Today I want to make a general post about moving to the United States and specifically to the state Pennsylvania. I am extremely exited about the whole idea of moving from my current country(Georgia) I literally cannot wait to do that and I could go on and on about all the things which are wrong with this place but I'd rather briefly sum it up and say - I had 28 years to learn the fact that I don't belong here, never did and never will, so the logical move is to leave this place and move on.

Now comes the interesting part - My husband is from Pittsburgh PA and it seems natural that he expects us to move back and settle there. And I know it's not something which just bothers me but as much as I am super exited about moving the the U.S. and start a new life there, it scares me equally just as same. I guess it's a natural feeling and I am most likely not the only one with this feeling but yet I get these frequent panic attacks every time I start thinking about all those multiple details, moving all the way across the ocean will bring aand it's SCARY! I get cold feet and second thoughts and then trying to calm myself down saying it will be alright! One step at a time! You are not the only one! etc. Over and over again!

Fortunately or not, I've already been to the States before and lived there for about 6 months which gave me a pretty solid idea on how it is to live there etc. but even after all those months I couldn't get used to the place, I had a pretty big culture shock aand to my HUGE surprise I was homesick! and at the end just wanted to ''go home'' as we ended up doing it... We live here for almost two year now and after 2 months already wanted to go back to states and started severely regretting our decision on coming back here. It's just such a huge step in life and it's overwhelming! I'm currently worried whether or not I will be able to get job soon, which neighborhood is best to chose, will I ever feel like home, like I belong? Finally! Plus I'm not sure about Pitt. but should I just move back there since I already somehow am familiar with it? It would be really great if some of you could share your experience on moving to PA or any other state . How long did it take you guys to not be homesick anymore? How long it took you to actually feel like home , what helped you to overcome your fears and doubts.

Thank you all in advance!

Cheers: )

[MADDEN 40]

Hey Lavender7

Making the move to whole other country no matter what brings you here is a huge decision and probably one of the biggest you can make in your life. All those feelings you have are totally natural and i'm sure a lot of people can relate to them as I can myself.

I have lived in Pennsylvania since late December of this year on the outskirts of a mid sized town, it's incredibly rural which is a big change for me after living in the city of Sydney. I have swapped crowded suburban living with noise and traffic to pastures, open spaces and beautiful greenery. My first two weeks here I didn't feel too homesick as we had our wedding to organise, my young daughter need to be enrolled in school and we had a new house to decorate but after all the excitement started to calm down and I had more time on my own that's when I really noticed how much I missed everything I left behind and the Homesickness really set in. I went through good days and some not so good, I guess my biggest guilt was had I done the right thing by my child after all I moved away from her friends and more importantly family. As weeks turn into months things started to improve, my husband bought me a car so now I had freedom to explore my surroundings, I started to get to know the other mum's from my daughter's school and I guess life here started to "normalise". So now 5 months on I still get Homesick but over time it does lessen, talk to your Husband and let him know when your feeling down don't bottle it up as that for me made it worse, keep busy and if possible try and do hobbies or outings that you did back in your home country, even simple things like cooking a meal that you eat back home can all help. I found that keeping in regular contact with loved ones was also a big help as I was always up to date with what everyone was doing.

Pennsylvania is a beautiful state to explore, we have a beautiful mix of large open farmlands surrounded by wooded mountains and many great lakes. I haven't been into Pittsburgh yet as it's a 3 hour drive from us but I hear it's a fantastic city and i'm hoping we will make it up there this summer. I find the people here warm and extremely welcoming and at this point cant really imagine moving. My daughter loves it here and settled well into her new school and has made many new friends so that was another huge worry off my mind.

So I hope this might of helped in some little way and I wish you well on this new stage of you life. Remember homesickness is normal and some feel it more then others but it does lessen so give yourself time to adjust and enjoy.

[kelly122581 0]

I'm American - from Pittsburgh and have been living in Belgium for 11 years. I never got over being homesick, but learned to enjoy my new home too! Once you move abroad, you end up with your heart in two places. We are about to move back to Pittsburgh ourselves. I grew up there and love the city, and even though I have lived in many other countries and cities, nothing ever really compares to Pitt! There is so much to offer and a huge international presence!

I hope you settle in to your life there quickly! Maybe we will see you there

[Lavender7 32]

I'm American - from Pittsburgh and have been living in Belgium for 11 years. I never got over being homesick, but learned to enjoy my new home too! Once you move abroad, you end up with your heart in two places. We are about to move back to Pittsburgh ourselves. I grew up there and love the city, and even though I have lived in many other countries and cities, nothing ever really compares to Pitt! There is so much to offer and a huge international presence!

I hope you settle in to your life there quickly! Maybe we will see you there

Thank you so much for your reply Kelly! Maybe you could suggest me good neighborhood to move to, it's one of the biggest worries I personally have about moving back to Pitt. Honestly I still haven't seen all of it but what I think I know for sure is that I want to avoid living in suburbs and try to find something a little close to the city which seems to be a challenge right now as I'm checking online realtor websites, prices are much higher for places near downtown. We will be moving with a toddler so that adds to my worries even more, I want to find kid friendly place where certain amenities would be in a walking distance! That was one of my biggest problems , since my husbands family lives in suburbs I literally couldn't go anywhere by food! That was a huge challenge which made me even more homesick that I would normally get. I just don't want to repeat the same mistakes and settle in the are which is not cut off the civilization sort to speak And yes! It would be great to meet you when we all are there! I could surely use new friends : )

[Lavender7 32]

Hey Lavender7

Making the move to whole other country no matter what brings you here is a huge decision and probably one of the biggest you can make in your life. All those feelings you have are totally natural and i'm sure a lot of people can relate to them as I can myself.

I have lived in Pennsylvania since late December of this year on the outskirts of a mid sized town, it's incredibly rural which is a big change for me after living in the city of Sydney. I have swapped crowded suburban living with noise and traffic to pastures, open spaces and beautiful greenery. My first two weeks here I didn't feel too homesick as we had our wedding to organise, my young daughter need to be enrolled in school and we had a new house to decorate but after all the excitement started to calm down and I had more time on my own that's when I really noticed how much I missed everything I left behind and the Homesickness really set in. I went through good days and some not so good, I guess my biggest guilt was had I done the right thing by my child after all I moved away from her friends and more importantly family. As weeks turn into months things started to improve, my husband bought me a car so now I had freedom to explore my surroundings, I started to get to know the other mum's from my daughter's school and I guess life here started to "normalise". So now 5 months on I still get Homesick but over time it does lessen, talk to your Husband and let him know when your feeling down don't bottle it up as that for me made it worse, keep busy and if possible try and do hobbies or outings that you did back in your home country, even simple things like cooking a meal that you eat back home can all help. I found that keeping in regular contact with loved ones was also a big help as I was always up to date with what everyone was doing.

Pennsylvania is a beautiful state to explore, we have a beautiful mix of large open farmlands surrounded by wooded mountains and many great lakes. I haven't been into Pittsburgh yet as it's a 3 hour drive from us but I hear it's a fantastic city and i'm hoping we will make it up there this summer. I find the people here warm and extremely welcoming and at this point cant really imagine moving. My daughter loves it here and settled well into her new school and has made many new friends so that was another huge worry off my mind.

So I hope this might of helped in some little way and I wish you well on this new stage of you life. Remember homesickness is normal and some feel it more then others but it does lessen so give yourself time to adjust and enjoy.

Hey, thank you for your reply, it means a lot! It always helps to know that someone else shares same feeling as us and even if we feel alone at times, in fact we are not! My husband was telling me to be stronger back in Pitt, when I was already freaking out , telling him I just wanted to go home. Others were telling me that it takes time to get used to things, but I just had some tough time, being on a tourist visa and not being able to use health insurance or work, I couldn't drive, I just felt paralized for the hole time I was there and didn't have enough patience to actually proceed with my Green Card application from there etc. At some point I'm glad we didn't apply from there but sometimes I feel regretful that I wasn't more patient and persistent because my husband now feels also extremely homesick and he misses states and he just can't function here in general, because of number of obstacles like language barrier, poor economy in the country and virtually no opportunities whatsoever so now I feel guilty of bringing him here..we are planning on applying for my GC soonish soo..hopefully everything will be alright: )

[kelly122581 0]

Thank you so much for your reply Kelly! Maybe you could suggest me good neighborhood to move to, it's one of the biggest worries I personally have about moving back to Pitt. Honestly I still haven't seen all of it but what I think I know for sure is that I want to avoid living in suburbs and try to find something a little close to the city which seems to be a challenge right now as I'm checking online realtor websites, prices are much higher for places near downtown. We will be moving with a toddler so that adds to my worries even more, I want to find kid friendly place where certain amenities would be in a walking distance! That was one of my biggest problems , since my husbands family lives in suburbs I literally couldn't go anywhere by food! That was a huge challenge which made me even more homesick that I would normally get. I just don't want to repeat the same mistakes and settle in the are which is not cut off the civilization sort to speak And yes! It would be great to meet you when we all are there! I could surely use new friends : )

There are a lot of little neighborhoods in Pittsburgh. In the city you could check out Squirrel Hill, Highland Park, Morningside, Point Breeze, Regent Square, Mount Washington. I grew up in the smaller town of Sewickley. It is about 15 miles outside of PGH, but it is a village not a suburb. It has its own little town center and was very walkable and connected to PGH by a great bus line. There are lots of little villages like this outside of the city center.