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i-485 rfe, officer saying wife was deported when she was a child

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So We had our green card interview a few weeks ago. We received a phone call from the immigration officer asking us to call her back as she had some questions and was going to issue an Rfe. we received the letter asking for my wifes living details since her first J - 1 visa was issued, which we have all documentation on that. It also asked for copies of the passport for each time she entered and left the country, which we have all of those. Then over the phone, the officer was very rude to my wife saying that she has other cases to take care of and not to call and bother her. Seem she forgot she gave us her direct line in a voicemail and asked us to call. however, my main concern is that the officer says my wife was deported 23 years ago, as she was in the country with her parents. Her parents recently received their permanent residency cards and the lawyer they used ran a background check to make sure there was no deportation record, and there wasn't. The officer asked my wife if she knew about this and my wife said yes we were in the United States but I was never deported. Is this officer just trying to give us a hard time? We filled out the application marking she had never been deported because there was never a letter issued to her, so why is USCIS saying she was deported?

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Get the back-up documentation from the parents' lawyer, or find a lawyer to run another background check. Call the officer back, get her full name or at least badge number, and insist on contact-information for her supervisor. Do not hang up the phone until you get it. This might straighten out the officer's lack of courtesy.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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We have the letter she sent us with her full name. Should I include that letter showing no deportation since she brought it up on the phone? Or for now just send the documentation she requested and wait to see if she sends another rfe? She also asked for all i-20s, but my wife told her over the phone that she does not have those because those don't relate to a j-1 visa, but that we have all of her ds-2019s and the officer goes "oh ok yeah send those".....this lady doesn't seem to be following procedure very well, but I don't know if trying to go over her head would be good to do since she is our IO

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