Murder mystery

[Peikko 1,575]

Some hour earlier, back at the gas station, a very, very old lady had finally wedged herself behind the steering wheel of a 76 Cadillac Eldorado Convertible, turned the key in the ignition and swung out onto the highway. She had followed Michelle and Richard as far as the motel where upon she had booked into room 12. She had witnessed Richard's scrumpy boozing and had surmised, wrongly as it turned out, that she had a good 8 hours before Richard would be fit cause any further mayhem. She had called room service to bring a tray of tea and English muffins at 6.30 a.m. precisely, removed her hearing aid and settled down to sleep

Edited June 27, 2008 by Purple_Hibiscus

[SteveLaura 0]

Richard surveyed the dead and bloodied bodies surrounding him. He counted 7 taxidermists and at least one interior decorator. A dental hygienist, tongue deprerssor still in her hand, eased slowly down the wall leaving a scarlet stain. "Rinse, please," she gasped and then crumpled to the floor.

Kicking aside an expired insurance salesman, Richard peered into the hoile in the motel room floor. It took a few seconds for his eyes to adjust to the darkness and his ears to discern his sister's delirious ramblings through the echo.

"I'm going to guess, 'White Chocolate Mousse', Pat..", she murmured.

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Hauling a dazed and confused Michelle out of the hole in the floor, Richard pulled her towards the now open door and out into the night with barely an “are you ok?”.

Lights were on in some of the other rooms, blinds fluttered in the windows and numerous pairs of frightened eyes squinted out between the slats – no doubt alerted by the commotion of the gun battle. I mean… who wouldn’t be…?

Someone would be calling 9/11, that seemed clear, but out here in the middle of nowhere who knew how long it would take to arrive. In fact “Help” probably wasn’t the right word, Richard mused as they raced toward the parking lot. Just as likely it’ll be some tobacco-chewing Hick Sheriff’s deputy who’d probably resent having to abandon his quiet lay by and friday-night six-pack. “Help” like that would be as useless as a screen door on a submarine. At times like this Richard was grateful for his Special Forces training.

They had almost made it to the car and Richard fumbled in his pocket for the second time that day, this time however his questing fingers were after the car keys. Suddenly an engine roared into life behind them – a rack of halogen lights blazed on, turning night into day and momentarily dazzling the pair. Shading his eyes against the glare Richard made out the ominous shape of what could only be an army jeep and a strangely familiar hunched shape manning what looked like a vehicle mounted machine gun. A strange smell of roasted meat hung in the air.

Laughing maniacally, the old man let rip with the 50 cal.

[Peikko 1,575]

Laughing maniacally, the old man let rip with the 50 cal...at the door of room 12. Richard was mesmerized and stood rooted to the spot. Michelle dreaded what she knew was coming next and half closed her eyes in a prefunctory attempt to stave off the unpleasant but familiar sight. Sure enough a damp stain appeared on Richard's pants. Michelle sighed and made a mental note to stop at the nearest Walmart to get a bumper sized pack of incontinence pads.

Meanwhile, in room 12 the old lady awoke with a start. She could not hear the sound of gunfire, she was way to deaf without her hearing aid for that, but something was wrong, of that she was absolutely sure.

[Krikit 1,166]

Sunlight was streaming through a number of holes in her door. "It must be morning." she muttered sleepily. She got up and looked through one. A pair of bloodshot eyes were peering back at her.

"Got any Depends in there?" the owner of the eyes asked.

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

"My goodness!" the crone said in her quavering "old lady" voice. "you shouldn't sneak up on an old woman like that. You could have blown me away with a feather!".

Seconds later she discovered how true this was (except that the feathers were not feathers - they were heavy 50 cal slugs!) as another hail of bullets smashed into the door, destroying it and much of the adjoining wall in a blizzard of flying splinters and choking plaster dust; and turning the old woman unceremoniously into the human equivalent of ground beef (93% lean).

Edited June 27, 2008 by Number 6

[SteveLaura 0]

There was silence for a moment. Dust settled gently on the barely discernible body of the old woman. Shafts of light from the now-shattered window danced lightly across her mutilated flesh. Sparrows, made tame by years of titbits left by bird-loving guests, flittered onto the sill and pecked hungrily at invisible seeds. A tiny flower on the bedside cabinet shed a petal onto the floor like a tear. The old man broke the tableau with a sniff.

"Whoopsy, wrong room," he coughed, and hiked his mammoth weapon back onto his shoulder.

[Peikko 1,575]

Meanwhile, during the noise and confusion of the latest frenzy of gunfire, Michelle grabbed her dazed brother, shoved him unceremoneously into the passenger side of their car, snatched the keys from his feeble grasp and rammed them home into the ignition. With a fierce twist, she started the car, jammed the car into drive and burned rubber as she hurled out of the driving lot, turned right onto the highway and headed out of town.

She looked behind her frequently, terrified that at any moment she'd see the grizzly, burnt old man driving that beat up jeep or worse still a fleet of cop cars on her tail. After ten minutes of break neck speed she slowed the vehicle to a more reasonable pace and searched the streets for a Walmart.

[Krikit 1,166]

She parked the car and went inside. "If we dress like regular Wal-Mart shoppers we'll go unnoticed" she said. They headed to the clothing section where they picked out some plaid pyjama bottoms, a Nascar tube top, and a wife-beater. A cheap pair of flip-flops, some slippers, and a trucker cap completed the ensemble.

"Okay, bro. Go grab some Depends from the pharmacy, and I'll pick up some beer and pretzels, a shotgun, and the survival equipment. We'll tell the cashier we're going on our honeymoon."

It was obvious that the wife-beater was for her.

Edited June 28, 2008 by Krikit

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

The urine on Richard's trousers had long since dried but he still smelled like a bum on an a bender. Cursing his way through the self-checkout, he snatched up the carrier bag and stalked out of the store, pausing only to punch out the greeter, whose unnatural cheerfulness at this time of night (which Michelle put down to either too much coffee, or heavy addiction to barbiturates) seemed a mite too cheerful for his liking.

Back in the car, Michelle waited while Richard changed his clothes and did his best to scrub the dried piss off his legs with a damp cloth. He still reeked of urine, but the smell was a little less sharp than before.

The slightly fresher (but not really) Richard climbed into the passenger seat as Michelle started up the engine and put the car into Drive.

"Now if we can avoid any more violent distractions and assuming you can stop p*ssing yourself for 5 minutes, I suggest we sort out that thing about our f*cking brother. I can't believe I missed 3 episodes of Deal or No Deal for this Sh!t!"

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

"Let's go then" Richard sulked. "I was tired of driving anyway".

[sara..... 371]

"Let's go then" Richard sulked. "I was tired of driving anyway".

Just as Michelle was pulling out of the parking lot

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

The land shot by and as Richard glanced over as the speedometer he noticed with some alarm that they were already driving in excess of 85mph. He looked over at Michelle for validation but her eyes were fixed on the road - jaw set, teeth gritted.

"I figure that if I drive really fast, we'll get to our destination without further mishap" She said, without taking her eyes off the road.

[Peikko 1,575]

Those would be such ironic 'famous last words but fortunately this story is now going to meander into rather calmer waters. Michelle was a good driver and the freeway was largely deserted. The car sped on and the scenery slid past Richard's eyes, the monotonous movement, coupled with the lack of a good 8 solid hours of deep sleep, numbed his mind to the point where he drifted out of consciousness. His head lolled back, his mouth opened and drool drizzled down the side of his mouth. Michelle glanced briefly over at her sleeping brother as he started to snore softly.

"That's rich" muttered Michelle. "First he pisses himself, now he's dribbling and if he runs true to form I'll be deaf by the time we reach the state border." She began to have the rather uncharitable thoughts that centered around the theme that the killer had picked the wrong brother to put to death.

Edited July 1, 2008 by Purple_Hibiscus

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

The beginnings of a thought started to form in Michelle's mind. Perhaps she'd be doing the world a favor if Richard were to quietly disappear. At least she wouldn't have to endure the piss and baby vomit smell in the car anymore. It would be a simple thing, she reasoned... Just a matter of lashing the steering wheel, wedging the gas to the floor and aiming the car at the nearby cliff that was (conveniently) fast approaching. The ditch to her left was grassy ditch softened by recent rainfall. If she threw herself out of the speeding car, she'd likely get away with little more than cuts and bruises. Priceless.

Instinctively, Michelle unbuckled her seat belt...

Edited July 1, 2008 by Number 6