please help

[sleeplessinusa 0]

ok this is going to be a long one.. ill be completely honest because i need it all out and off my chest at last.

any advice is appreciated..

i came to the US almost 8 years ago on a student visa and went to school for a while. then i dropped out cause i couldnt afford it (neither could my family) and stayed with my sister and her husband. i am a hardworking guy, and i dont like taking things for granted, so i worked a whole bunch of odd jobs for a few years to support myself and help out at home. from factory jobs to cleaning jobs to assembly jobs to food service, a little bit of everything.. and got tired of how i was never moving along in life or at a much slower pace than everybody else. im getting older, 31 years now.. and it was getting to be a real burden trying to hide or shy away from anything 'legal' that would ask for paperwork. but no one really cared or bothered or offered to help me out either financially or legally or give me any sort of advice, so i had to survive somehow. anyways, after a few years of working these random, very poor paying jobs.. i took the advice of some friends of mine and got married (on paper) to a USC. a hippie, fun-loving girl from iowa who knew exactly what we're getting into and is helping me out because she believes everybody should get a fair shot in this country. ofcourse, she took some money to begin with but honestly she asked for very little since. she genuinely wants to help me out, thats all. its been going downhill from there though.. first i decided to file my paperwork by myself because i couldnt afford a lawyer, so i downloaded all the forms off the internet, filled them out and sent them off. got a letter a couple of months later saying there was missing evidence, something about an NSEERS issue, and i was asked to go this interview to fix it. my bro-in-law said it was a sting thing and that they were trying to get all the arabs to go and get arrested after 9/11, so i dropped the whole thing and thought since im working anyways, given not the best of jobs but getting paid at least and getting by, i was in no rush to get myself into trouble. that was back in 2003 i think. a few years later getting nowhere on those $6.50/hr paychecks, i decided to file again with a proper lawyer last year. we filed the whole thing, ead, greencard, i-130, borrowed some money and paid for it all. we kept up appearances infront of the lawyer and got everything together. sent out, got an appt pending for fingerprints. i went in and got that out of the way.. some missing evidence, sent it in.. ofcourse this took a few months to process. and finally they ask me to go in for an interview because i failed to register for NSEERS in the past, and although it sounded fishy i decided i wanted to come clean this time, otherwise ill feel like im always on the run living here. so i go in, and surely enough it was only a way to get me out there and i got arrested on site. i spent three weeks in jail until my family was able to put bail together and get me out. by now i was getting extremely fed up with the whole thing.. and the only thing thats holding me back from leaving is knowing how horrible things were back in my country and how everybody i speak to is dying to leave.. and that buys me a little patience. the first news i get when i get out is the EAD (I-765) getting declined.. what a beautiful welcome i think, and take it in stride. i speak to some friends about it and one of them suggested i talk to the local congressman about it, he heard a friend of his got something done faster that way. and surely enough, after a few weeks of visits back and forth with the local congress office, we sent a letter out and an i-765 re-application and some MORE money and finally i get the EAD at last. i was super excited when i got it, this was the first legal document that defines me in this country for almost 8 years now.. i did not have a single ID for almost 6 years, which is unbelievable looking back now. i could not drive, could not go anywhere that required an ID, could not get anything done properly, lived in the shadows.. so this was super good news. even though i went to jail for it, it took almost 5 years and almost 8,000$ in recurring lawyer and form fees, i felt it was worth it. but ofcourse, these good things dont last too long. next letter i got was asking for an interview with the wife for the i-130 form. i asked my friends about it and googled it a few times and realized there is now way in hell we can pass this thing. its a two hour interview and there is no way around them knowing that we were not in a real marriage. we have zero documents or pictures together or anything that really proves that we are married besides the marriage certificate.. so we decided not to go this meeting and re-schedule it. understandibly she wouldnt want to get herself caught up doing something like this, which i completely undersand ofcourse and wouldnt ask her to anyways. and now this is where i stand and i have just lost all hope that this will go anywhere from here. i have a court hearing with a judge in a couple of weeks who wants to hear how things are going with the I-130 to decide how matters are dealt with, i think i got him assigned to me or i got a case going after i got out of jail, and i have no idea what to do from here.

i know i got myself into this mess but god knows i did not do it willingly. and i never meant to 'cheat' anybody out of anything or get ahead of anybody illegally or obtain benefits i dont deserve. my wife knew my intentions the day we got married and the way i saw it, i just wanted a chance to work like everybody else and support myself and earn a living and stop feeling like im less than anybody who can apply places i cant or get chances i cant. and now it has snowballed out of control, and i dont know what to do anymore. this forum looks like a knowledgeable place so i thought id speak it out here and hopefully somebody can tell me whats the best thing i can do right now. i dont trust anything the lawyer says, hes too fresh out of law school anyways, and my family back home just wants to hear that im ok.. the wife doesnt want too much trouble out of this whole thing, and its all growing to be a heavier burden on me every single day and its something i worry and think about every single night. and after a while of googling, i realized i cannot get the greencard approved without the i-130 and i cannot get the i-130 without that interview, and theres no way we can survive that interview. is there anything i can do to be in this country legally from here ?? any fine i can pay or process i can follow ?? any advice is HUGELY appreciated..

Edited May 9, 2008 by sleeplessinusa

[raymaga 26]

I can understand why you are "sleepless", that's for sure.

I hate to tell you this, but you will most likely get very little sympathy here on VJ with your situation. We all had to go about getting our visas, green cards, etc. legally and this forum only supports legal ways to immigrate to the U.S.

You should not have remained in the U.S. after you dropped out of school, you should not have married someone just to get the Green Card, and you probably will not be able to remain in the U.S. now.

Unfortunately, you are most likely going to have to return to your country and try to make a life for yourself.

[saratara 0]

Common just take your wife and go for an interview, get some pics. When I went with my husband for an interview we only had cell phone bill on both names, and pictures, and nothing else!!! Interview is not so scary!!

You just have to be confident, and just stop saying that you got married only for papers that is not gonna help you!

If you was strong to survive all those years then do until the end what you start!!!

Good luck!