Ramisgreat

; I really think it's unbelieveable how you guys tell him to "man up". Is he a heartless robot? NO!!!

Though, I agree he pushed her buttons over this Valentine's Day thing, but getting aggrivated by the things your significant other says or does happens in a relationship!!

Maybe, because of this emotional waiting process pushed her buttons even more than he actually meant to.. Like he said, it wasn't only about Valentines Day, she didn't act happy over their NOA2 after all!!! And maybe Valentines Day was the last drop of water that did make the bucket fall..

Please, don't tell him to man up, he is very emotional, I would be too if I were him!!!

Yall think it's only about Valentines Day, which is not!! Heck, how would yall do if you received your LONG WAITED NOA2? EXTREMELY HAPPY, right?? He was, but she wasn't. That was a very bad sign.

He also stated that he supported her during the whole process and what more. He visited her, he did everything that made her happy, he paid all the expenses, he tried to talk about adjusting and he told her that he would support her during her adjusting period to make her the happiest girl in the World.

He is emotional, don't say anything bad if he is just asking for help how he can go through this terrible time.

If yall read carefully, it wasn't only about V's Day!! Like I said, she must have had changed her mind before they even received their NOA2, otherwise she would be uber-happy when she heard they received their NOA2.

Put yourself in his shoes, how would you react if your fiance(e) would do the same thing, and you asked for emotional support? Would you like to hear those things like "man up" ??

WE ARE HERE TO SUPPORT EACH OTHER!!!!

Hi I am his ex finacee. I am not going to write whether i'm right or wrong but yes i will just put down how behaved with me post NOA2.

The night we received the NOA2, we both were jumping and expressing our happiness, I went running to my parents to tell them 'we have done it at last.'They were happy too.

2nd day i was little upset for something that happened in my family and i was not being able to show how happy i am,but later i kept telling him 'i am happy but somehow its sad out here' I am leaving now,this feeling is making me sad but i am happy i will finally live with u. 3rd day,he called me from office and i spoke in normal tone,not happy not sad,i dont know what went wrong he screamed from the parking lot 'im tired of your ###### sadness,your ###### sadness' and also some slang he used on me in my mother tongue,this was my first shock.I don't know this man,never lived with him, so of course i kept telling him i am scared of u, he said he is sorry, i said ill be really scared if u scream like this when we fight in person (trust me it was not normal scream,he was at the top of his lung in a public place and over the phone with me, and the reason being I AM NOT SHOWING HIM EXCITEMENT) well, i was happy but tensed for 'n' number of reason which the petitioners here won't understand much but the beneficiaries who r leaving for good might.He told me if he ever gets angry and wants to shout in person he would leave the house and go out.I mean its not too normal for Indians here.

Later we made up and again he started with same topic i am not showing him excitement, i felt getting mentally tortured when he was doing this, i was going to office, he knew it i am going to office and i am howling requesting him to hang up,but he won't his only statement was 'don't go to office, its not a good day for u to go to office',he doesn't need to show me concern after he had made me cry already,he need not do it at all.I might not have reacted how HE WANTED me to react,but he can't deny,everyday i told him i was happy that we got NOA2. I just couldn't explain it to him till end,when i asked my mom to tell him that i was happy.My mom made him understand that 'she is happy but may be she is little scared to leave for good now,she will be actually happy when she will meet u and start her life for good'. He then understood.We patched up.

Next after this we had several small fights,but the worst was the valentines day.

I DID SEND HIM GIFT BUT IT DID NOT GET DELIVERED,I KNEW HE WONT BELIEVE ME SO I GAVE HIM THE FLORIST PHONE NUMBER WHICH WAS A USA NUMBER,THEY CONFIRMED I DID SEND HIM THE GIFT BUT THEY WROTE THE ADDRESS WRONG. SO IT WAS NOT MY FAULT. (I HAVE STILL NOT GOT REFUND,WHICH I DON'T CARE ANYWAY, I DON'T CRY OVER MONEY). I CALLED THEM TO ASK WHY THEY DID NOT DELIVER, THEY APOLOGIZED BUT NEVER DELIVERED THE GIFT, I TOO SAD FOR THAT,I TOLD MY EX I AM SO SORRY AND I AM REALLY SAD IT WAS NOT DELIVERED.HE WAS OK THAT DAY, NEXT MORNING I WAS SLEEPING HE WOKE ME UP WITH A VERY RUDE VOICE,HE TOLD ME I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING FOR HIM THIS TIME AS HE DID SEND ME GIFTS AND I TRIED BUT FAILED.HE THREATENED ME IF I DON'T DO SOMETHING FOR HIM HIS IS GOING TO HOLD THIS VISA PROCESS, I WAS LIKE 'WHAT ARE U SAYING? THIS MIGHT BREAK OUR RELATION??' HE TOLD ME 'YEA I KNOW,GO TELL YOUR DAD YOU ARE NOT COMING TO USA AS YOUR FIANCEE IS HOLDING THE PROCESS'. I WAS SHOCKED,I ASKED 'WHAT U WANT ME TO DO'? HE SAID GO TO THE INTERNET AND DO SOMETHING.SO I WENT TO THE INTERNET AND SEND HIM E-CARD AND EMAIL AND SEND HIM SOME PICS OF ME AND MY FAMILY.I DID NOT KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO TO MAKE HIM HAPPY.\

HE REPLIED IN HIS E-MAIL:

I don't know what you've done over the internet for me except for the e-card you sent. You would have sent pics of your bro's engagement anyway regardless of Valentine's Day. I don't know if you're counting that or not but I cannot count that as a Valentine's gift for me. So if you think you cannot do something to make up for it, this problem will remain unfixed and I cannot proceed further with our visa. And I really have heard a lot of apologies. All I want now is action. I cannot settle for nearly nothing again this year while I gave everything. That is not fair to me. I am deserving a Valentine's gift this year, and I cannot let this go by. So I hope you know what to do before the week is out.

I DON'T NEED TO PROVE MY LOVE I THINK.I DID WHAT I COULD.I MAY NOT BE THE RIGHT,BUT YES HE DESERVES A GIRL WHO CAN LIVE UP TO HIS EXPECTATIONS.HE KNOWS HOW MUCH I HAVE PRAYED FOR US.AND NOW I FEEL I HAD BEEN A FOOL.I DON'T EXPECT HIS PARENTS TO UNDERSTAND ME AND NOT CALL ME 'HEARTLESS AND CRUEL' BECAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE A DAUGHTER.

I DON'T WANT THIS THREAD TO CONTINUE,I DON'T KNOW WHY STARTED THIS THREAD,MAY BE TO MAKE ME LOOK BAD,BUT IF THAT MAKES HIM HAPPY.ITS FINE. I KNOW WE WERE NEVER MEANT TO BE AFTER ALL THIS.

Thank u all, especially Al422 lvcouple2010 happyme'11, U guys really made me feel better.Trust me i know most of the things u wrote in here.I know it all,but when u are about to do something this serious in life,weird and stupid things disturb your mind,and this distance sucks.I love him like crazy and if anything goes wrong ill be devastated.I know we fight we make up, we hurt each other by saying wrong things which we don't even mean,but at the end of the day we both know we can't do without each other.I pray for us and all those who are about to start their new life to be happy and successful in this journey.God is there.Thank u all once again.

Hi all

I really would like to ask the girls out here,who are about to leave their home country and move to their lovely fiancee's country, that isn't it scary to u all to leave everything back here and move? I know we all love our respective fiancee,and we all knew from the start that this would eventually happen,but honestly when i'm finally doing this i am extremely nervous.So many questions are on my mind:

1) Will this relationship work in the long run (since we never had normal dating period, for years, before settling down)?

2)Will i be able to adjust to a new country?

3) Will my fiancee love me forever and value the fact that i have left behind everything just to be with him for the rest of my life?

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY

4) Will i see exactly what i have thought of him all these months and he doesn't change colors (no offense to him, but this is what i hear from people around that men change after marriage).

I really hope my relationship works out and we have a good married life,God willing.

Nonetheless my fiancee is a great guy but when people around tell u that 'i hope u r doing the right thing,its not a matter of few hours journey that we can come to your rescue if anything goes wrong,u have no friends no family there and no one to share your problems..blah blah blah' it makes me numb and scare me all the more.

I practically have NO ONE in the US,its only him whom i know and no one else in that huge country.Its dam scary.But i do trust him and God.Hope everything will be fine,finger crossed. I really love this man,and i hope he would love me the same or more for doing this all for him.

I know others have started similar threads on here, but I don't care. I want to share my story with others about how all the events unfolded today.

When this day started, I thought this week would be just another week with no end in sight for our NOA2. My fiancee and I even started this morning with a fight over something stupid after I called her before going to work. I thought this week would be another week of hell since "morning shows the day", literally in our case. After I came to work and started my duties, I felt myself slipping down the slope of sanity, more so than usual on other days. For the past 5 months, I was able to hold on to my sanity and return my attention back to my work with no problems. But today was different. I simply could not take it anymore. My fiancee and I have been praying solidly and consistently non-stop from opposite sides of the world for the last 5 months. Around 12 pm, after checking more and more people on VJ from August were getting approved as the Vermont Service Center had recently woken up from its slumber, not to mention some people who received their NOA1 later than ours were getting approved, I texted my fiancee saying, "I have had enough of this wait", "I simply cannot take it anymore", and "I am losing my sanity". My fiancee came online soon afterward and told me to calm down and then go splash some water on my face and return to work. And she warned me to avoid returning to this website because these timelines were making the wait much more worse for us. I did as she said and told her that I still have faith in God but I am losing faith in myself. I simply could not wait any longer. But I was determined I'd only check VisaJourney once a day from now on.

After we ended our chat and I returned back to work, I tried desperately to focus on my job, but my brain felt like it was on fire, my head was spinning, my palms were sticky and sweaty, and I was having one of the worst days during this long and arduous wait. After a few more minutes of breathing heavily, I started to place my focus back on my job. Since I normally keep my phone on vibrate and in my shirt pocket, at that very moment, just as I was about to sink into my work, my pocket vibrated. I dismissed the vibration outright since my phone normally alerts me if I get an email, if I get a missed call on my Google Voice number, or if my fiancee texts me. Because I had no desire to check my phone today, I thought I'll text my fiancee later on after I regained some composure and returned to a somewhat normal mood. So I returned to my work. But about 10 seconds later, I get a desktop notification on my computer's taskbar that I received an email on my Gmail account. And I'm thinking to myself, "what are the chances that I receive an SMS and an email within seconds of each other?" Very, very small!! And then I think to myself, "Have I truly lost my mind today?" "Can it possibly be what I'm thinking about?"

I instantly pulled my phone out of my pocket, opened the SMS app, and read the following: "Your case is now updated. Check 'My Case Status' at www.uscis.gov . . . ".

I instantly darted my attention away from my work and knew right then and there I would not be able to work today. lol I opened up my Gmail account and read the following message.

"*** DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS E-MAIL ***

The last processing action taken on your case

....

Application Type: I129F , PETITION FOR FIANCE(E)

Your Case Status: Post Decision Activity

On January 31, 2011, we mailed you a notice that we have approved this I129F PETITION FOR FIANCE(E). Please follow any instructions on the notice. If you move before you receive the notice, call customer service at 1-800-375-5283.

.

.

.

.

Sincerely,

The U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS)"

Reading only the few first words of that message, I jumped out of my office chair, I opened the bookmark to the USCIS website while standing, and I found the change I've waited more than 5 months to see! The USCIS site finally changed the "Initial Review" status to say "Post Decision Activity"!

I immediately locked out my computer, ran into the hallway outside, and speed dialed my fiancee while covering my chest with one hand feeling my heart pound as though I just ran up a flight of stairs. My fiancee answered the phone in her normal manner. I told her, "Baby, my heart is palpitating today." She replied, "You saw that website again. Didn't you?" I answered, "No, something else happened to me." And from then on, I was completely mute. My fiancee asked, "What? What happened?" But I didn't answer. She asked again. I didn't answer again. She knew I was on the phone since she could hear my heavy breathing. From the tension in my voice, she instantly knew something unusual happened, but I think she sensed the optimism and excitement in my voice too. And then she finally asked me. "Don't tell me. Is it what I think it is? Are you serious? Please tell me! Please answer me now!" Even at that point, although I wanted to unleash my enthusiasm like a dam with a surging river behind it, I still could not formulate the right words to express those emotions to her. So all I could say was the following, "Baby, I'm putting you on speaker, and I'll read you exactly what was written in the email I got." And next I read the email above out loud. From that point onward, she was launched into cloud 9, I was still reeling from my near brush with insanity, my hands were trembling, and my heart was palpitating stronger than ever. I was literally pacing back and forth in the hallway and almost dancing, and I could listen to her dancing up and down and telling her family that we have received our NOA2!!

God literally took a day I expected to be atrocious and turned it into one of the happiest days of my life!! God willing, if everything goes accordingly, hopefully I can be with my fiancee once and for all in the next few months, if she passes her interview next! Neither of us have to say goodbye to each other ever again when she comes to me. The most heart-wrenching and crushing feeling ever was when I last felt her hand about 7 months ago at the airport before I boarded my flight to Frankfurt, Germany and then on to Washington, D.C. I have relived that single moment time and time again in my head. I wished for so many days if I could relive the happiest 2 weeks of my life. But now God willing, He will give us both the chance to create new memories just like and better than the memories we created during those 2 weeks of my visit. I still can't believe this as I'm typing it! But it's true.

I thought I'd share this story with every one here on VJ. What is the moral of the story? Your time is coming. I kept my faith in God, in my fiancee, and in me. But the humorous part of the story is that everything fell into place on the day when I lost faith in myself and I could no longer take the wait.

I am very happy the Vermont Service Center has finally woken up and has gone through all the July and half of August applications in merely a week! Thank you Vermont! And congratulations to all the other filers out there who received their good news today and last week! Our time is finally here! And to all the others who are waiting, your time is coming very, very soon. After you receive your joyous news, you'll then understand my experience of a day full of a thousand emotions.

Baby u brought tears in my eyes.I love u so much,i am really lucky to have u as my fiancee.I know i go wrong at times and i disappoint u several times but what matters is that i can give up on anything,or anyone just to be with you for the rest of my life. You are a great guy and i am proud to have u. I super happy we got approved. Love ya

Unfortunately Congressmen/woman and/or Senators have very little influence over operations at USCIS. Here is information regarding the power of the "purse strings".

(This is from testimony before Congress in March 2010.)

The proposed budget request for USCIS for fiscal Year 2011:

"$2.8 billion in funding, of which $2.4 billion is financed through fee revenue and

$386 million is funded with appropriations. The appropriations request is $162 million

above the FY 2010 enacted level. This increase largely accounts for our request for fully

funding the asylum and refugee programs through appropriations."

I didn't wait nearly as long as some of you are waiting and I would be as mad as you all are if I had to wait this long!

I hope all of you are united with your loved ones quickly and the rest of your lives get started as soon as possible!!

Thank You. Usually people who are approved are arrogant and they literally hurt the unapproved filers.Good to see members like u.

What does the fact that someone is already reunited have to do with the reality of a situation?

I don't need to answer u.

You have six options:

Keep waiting

Withdraw your petition and cancel everything

Keep waiting

Move to their country

Keep waiting

Keep waiting

Amazing to see how people talk this way when they were approved in no time.Such comments are really not welcome.Thanks but no thanks for your advice.

Amazing to see how people talk this way when they were approved in no time.Such comments are really not welcome.Thanks but no thanks for your advice.

Omg this is the worst thing to read in this forum,i think its your fault to have hit him. It was not even one month and u knew he was not adjusting with u and u slapped him? It takes years to adjust,u can't expect your fiance to change in one days notice.Take your time to understand what marriage is all about. It ain't that easy.And honestly i don't think it was easy for him also to get u your K1 visa, he worked equally hard to get u one and then u must have done something really wrong that he had to forget all of it and send u back home. We r hearing one side of the story. U still love him cos He must not have done something real bad to u,he is not in love with u anymore and could send u home cos may b u HAVE done something real bad to him.More than u, i think he is hurt and must be feeling stupid about all the waiting he did for u.