Girona40

Some of you will know that I am going to England on Wednesday.

My father has asked me to try and find a CD of WWII songs, all the usual US and UK favourites, but sung in German. He says he heard the CD was only available in the US.

Any of you heard of it, or have any idea? I have searched Amazon and can't find anything close.

I would really appreciate it is any of you have any ideas. I would really like to be able to do this for him.

Thanks

G.

In Virginia you are required to take the written test and then go back to take the driving test. I took mine in Manassas a few years ago now. I was a bit miffed that I couldn't do it all in one day, but had to hold a learner's permit for a certain length of time (can't remember how long exactly now) before I could take the driving test.

The reason that the UK has to take the test and some other countries do not is because they drive on the left hand side of the road in the UK. All the other countries drive on the right, as they do in the US.

The test is easy - mine was just plain ridiculous. I was asked to drive out of the parking lot, turn right, do a U-turn about 100 yards down the street, return to the parking lot. That was it!!

The written test is simple - you'll have no problem with that if you have a UK license.

Oh, and you can drive on your UK license here for 6 months before you are required to have a US license.

Good Luck!

Passive Smoking Kills

Immediately I saw this thread I thought of Roy Castle. Some of you Americans may not know who he is, but he died of lung cancer from passive smoking. Click on the link to see two of the video's - they are not gruesome, but get the message across.

Thanks Becca. Michael has been with me all day. He spoke with his grandfather and grandmother and after putting the phone down he burst into tears. It is very hard for him - he stayed with them for several months before coming here to the US and he and his grandfather were extremely close. I just wish I could wave a magic wand and give Michael his AOS so that he was able to come with me. We have discussed Advanced Parole for Michael with our attorney and he isn't sure whether it is wise or not, at this stage in this bloody ridiculous "game". He said to apply and give him a few days to think about the possible consequences of using it.

Thank you so much, everyone. I didn't expect such a response.

You have all gone to so much trouble and I can't thank you enough.

Okay, managed to get a flight out on the 7th. Hubby's booking it now. I just have to be practical, even though I want to leave now.

Cost a total of $550 and there is an additional charge of $200 if I need to change the return date.

This is going to be a very long week.

At the moment the airlines are saying in the region of $2500, if I want to get there in the next week. I am probably going to have to hold off a week to get a cheaper flight. With my two children wanting to visit their grandfather also, price is something I am having to look at.

Hubby on the phone now to BA.

Thank you for your suggestions.

It has been hell of a week. I had surgery myself on Tuesday, not feeling too bad now, just about fit to travel. My son has been sick, my mother had polyps removed from her osophagus, my brother had a brain seizure, and now my poor old Dad has this.

It is particularly difficult to deal with since we only lost my sister a few years back to colon cancer. We never thought we would have to go through this again.

My son is beside himself - I dreaded the day something like this would happen. He is particularly close to his grandfather and we aren't sure he will be able to visit him. He has spent the entire day with me, very upset.

My father has been diagnosed with colon cancer. They are operating within the next few days and I need to get to the UK a.s.a.p. and as cheaply as possible.

I am in DC and need to get to London.

Anyone have any suggestions.

Thanks guys.

I have been a member since 2004, and am not a USC myself, as is my daughter. I still try and offer assistance to anyone I can, but these days I seem to be contacted more by PM or e-mail than anything else.

Our case is one of the rare ones - but not for much longer if the processing delays continue to grow. I look on here now purely to see if anyone is going through the same thing as us, or if anyone can offer any assistance because they know something we don't about the situation we are in - maybe something we've missed.

Once my son's case is finally dealt (whichever way it goes) I never want anything more to do with immigration matters.

You can't be married before entering the USA, or you will have violated the terms of the fiance visa.

Just a thought, but if this is simply a ceremony for the family in Chile, can you not ask the priest to perform a "Blessing" ceremony. One where he blesses your relationship and your future together. Technically, not a marriage requiring paperwork, but a religious ceremony where God's blessing is given? I am sure that the family would understand if you explained to them that the civil requirements are that you are not "married" when you enter the US, and a blessing of your relationship is the next best thing. Maybe a full marriage ceremony in Chile to celebrate your 5th wedding anniversary, something like that.

Good Luck with everything.

G.

Hi there Jo&John i am just replying to your post :

Here's what i think about your situation . Eventhough that your daugther turned 21 she going to get her permanent residence. Why? because is not like she is 22 remember that she has to be under 21 in order for her petition to be approved. She still falls in that under 21 age limit. Meaning her age being 21 is that limit. So she is going to be fine

Not sure what you are trying to get at JM23, but Jo and Jon's daughter is over 21. You say in your post that she has to be under 21 - she isn't under 21.

I hope that they apply the rules correctly in this case, Jo, because we believe strongly that in my son's case they are applying them incorrectly. There is nothing that says a K-2 has to be under 21 at the time of adjudication, only at the time of entry and at the time the original K-1 marries the original USC petitioner.

I hope the information I sent you helps. It just doesn't seem right that families are going through this stress, when I truly believe it is unecessary.

God Bless!

G.

It's a shame they can't apply the law equally, across the states, either.

I would like of offer Jo and John some hope in that we know of other cases in Texas where children over the age of 21, at the time of adjudication, was granted AOS. So, you just never know. It just depends on the adjudicator you get.

Hugs

G.

Maybe i can give those cases to our Congressman's staff so she can bring them up during her inquiry. Where do I get those? You give us hope.

Big Hugs,

I was talking to a woman from China, who lived in Houston, a couple of years ago now. She had a son who came in just a day before he turned 21. They didn't even get his application for AOS in before he turned 21 and yet they approved him. She would not give me any details on her case, for fear that it would jeopardise her son's position. I do know her name, but don't know that it will help. I would just sit tight at this time and see what they do. You may be one of the lucky ones, like her, and not have a problem. Let's hope so.

Believe me, Jo, I know exactly how you feel. It isn't right that this country allows us to bring our sons and daughters into the country, then to apply rules incorrectly and tell them that they are not allowed to stay. I have been over and over this in my head for years now and still can't understand how anyone could think it was fair.

You can only think positively now, as hard as that may be. Let your daughter know that you are hopeful. Like I said, Texas is the one state where I do know there are examples of derivative beneficiaries, over the age of 21, adjusting status.

Just think positive!

God Bless.

G.

It's a shame they can't apply the law equally, across the states, either.

I would like of offer Jo and John some hope in that we know of other cases in Texas where children over the age of 21, at the time of adjudication, was granted AOS. So, you just never know. It just depends on the adjudicator you get.

Hugs

G.

I am so thrilled that you, at least, have your AOS and your youngest daughter's AOS approved.

I am worried that there may be a problem with your other daughter though, seeing as they didn't send a Notice for her also.

If she turned 21 on the 6th January and they didn't get round to adjudicating her AOS until the 25th, as they did yours and your younger daughter, then (according to the rules they are applying in my son's case - which we don't agree with by the way) your eldest daughter would be considered an "age-out".

I hope and pray, for your sake, that they don't.

I just think situations like this are so sad and incredibly stressful on the parent.

God Bless and please keep us informed.

G.

Finally, my 9 year old daughter and I will be receiving our welcome notice in the mail and our green cards soon. We both had separate email notices from them with same content:

Application Type: I485 , APPLICATION TO REGISTER PERMANENT RESIDENCE OR TO ADJUST STATUS

Current Status: Notice mailed welcoming the new permanent resident.

On January 25, 2007, we mailed you a notice that we had registered this customer's new permanent resident status. Please follow any instructions on the notice. Your new permanent resident card should be mailed within 60 days following this registration or after you complete any ADIT processing referred to in the welcome notice, whichever is later. If you move before you get your new card call customer service. You can also receive automatic e-mail updates as we process your case. Just follow the link below to register.

If you have questions or concerns about your application or the case status results listed above, or if you have not received a decision from USCIS within the current processing time listed*, please contact USCIS Customer Service at (800) 375-5283.

*Current processing times can be found on the USCIS website at www.uscis.gov under Case Status & Processing Dates.

*** Please do not respond to this e-mail message.

Sincerely,

The U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS)

I am happy but sad...yes a paradox...because I don't know yet the status of my other daughter who turned 21 last January 6. She was done with the interview and biometrics before she turned 21. Our Congressman staff had been following up our case. Actually, the Lady staff made a follow-up last January 24. I emailed her again today and she emailed back that she will inquire again. She said that usually USCIS doesn't like Congressman offices to inquiry this early, but since my other daughter has already received this notice, she will go ahead and ask.

Please pray for our other daughter,

The child has up to a year after issuance of the original K-1 to apply for a K-2 visa - basically, exercising her "follow to join" rights.

She is entitled to derive status as a K-2 for one full year, and this is the easiest way to get her here, in my opinion.

You would need to get in touch with the consulate in your country and request that the process be started for issuance of a K-2 with follow-to-join rights. There is no need to file a seperate petition as you are within the one year timeframe.

As your daughter is only 13, the step-parent relationship was formed with your husband prior to her attaining the age of 18. If she wants to come at a later date, after the one year timeframe for eligibility of a K-2, your husband can petition for her as his stepdaughter on an I-130.

Good Luck!

How slow are they? It's the speed of the UK kettle that is part of its functionality. Currently I heat water on the hob and if a kettle is no quicker, I am not sure I would invest in one.

Mine is pretty quick. Let's put it this way, it would take twice as long to heat the equivalent amount of water on a stove.

My father, bless his heart, sent me a kettle from England, because I mentioned to him that I needed to get one. He didn't realise that an English kettle in the US would take an eternity to boil. hahaha. Anyway, my daughter bought me an electric kettle from Walmart - it was exactly the same shape and size as my stove-top one. Anyway, I was thrilled with it - it took less than a couple of minutes to boil.

Well, not having a "quite with it" moment - I put the electric kettle on the stove! Derrr!!!

My ex-husband would not give permission for me to bring my daughter to the US. Went to Court to obtain their permission to remove her from the jurisdiction of the Court. An Order was granted and she was able to come with me. It was seen to be in the best interest of the child and that is all the Judge cared about, her best interests.

"When my kids say they hate their father I tell them to feel sorry for him cos he's the one missing out on what great kids they are".

I used to say this to my children too, but wasn't aware that it was actually making the situation worse! I had thought I was doing the right thing, not turning them against him, not wanting them to hate him (he was their father after all) and wanting them to realise that he felt the way he did (that I hadn't paid him enough attention while caring for my dying sister) and our splitting up was not their fault.

In the end I had to get a counselor in to talk to them, I was worried because the behavious of my youngest son was a little "off the wall". He was getting in trouble at school, fighting with his siblings, all things that were out of character. Anyway, the counselor said that I wasn't to continually try to "smooth things over", I was to let them be angry, let them direct their anger at him. I wasn't to protect him. I was shocked at the time, thinking that I was doing the right thing and protecting them, but as it turned out she was right.

Years later the children told me that they were angry at him and he needed to know it. That I was stopping them from letting out that anger and that is why my youngest son was taking it out on everybody but my ex-husband, because he didn't want to upset me.

It's funny how we can so often misinterpret a situation. They didn't hate their father, they were angry at him, but didn't know any other way to put it. Oh, they have since told him he's a kn*b! lol They see each other, when they all get together in England, but they now realise that he wasn't (and still isn't by all accounts) a very mature person and they just pity him. Sad really, but at least they can move on with their lives knowing they did their best to have a relationship with him.

I have never used my child to 'get back at' my ex. I don't talk disparigingly about him around my home. I encourage my son to communicate with and visit his father.

I never wanted anything from my ex, nor do I now. However, I do wonder if by allowing fathers to pay nothing towards their childs upbringing is really the right way. If he had to pay something, maybe he would at least realise that in the eyes of society he still has a responsibilty towards his son and he would act in a more fatherly role. It's probably unlikely though.

I sincerely hope that you didn't think my comments were in any way aimed at you. It is so difficult to interject tone to a post and I was just commenting on how other people I know have acted.

I would hate to think I had caused you any offence - it was certainly not my intention. I agree with you 100%. It isn't right that the absent parent (not just fathers I might add) do not contribute to the upbringing of the child they contributed in making!

I never wanted anything from my ex when it came to child support. Unfortunately, because he left when I didn't have a job, and had to claim Income Support, the CSA got involved. I was awarded 2p a month and they sent it to me in the form of a cheque!

All the children ever wanted from him was for him to be a father, absent if that was his choice. But he couldn't even do that for them. Now that they are 18 years old, and still fighting to gain his attention, I see the damage he caused them was nothing to do with money and so that was never worth fighting.

Again, my sincere apologies if I caused you any personal offence, that was not what I had intended.

I think the parents needed to spend a little more time, prior to the flight, explaining to the little girl that she needed to behave. If they had explained that going on an airplane is exciting and sat and talked to her about how everything works and why she needs to be sitting in her seat, seatbelted, at take off and landing, it may have helped a bit.

I can't imagine having a child behave like that on a plane. I have three children, all grown up now, but they all loved flying and did as they were told and thoroughly enjoyed any flight. I think educating a child about the experience before they actually are placed in that position makes them more comfortable.

Seems like these parents didn't have much of a clue.

"The father said they would never fly AirTran again". I guess we can all count our blessings there then!

If it's any help. I arrived here in July 2002 and became a citizen in July 2006.

Backlogs weren't as bad back then, so I can't really tell you how long it takes nowadays. But, like I said, "if it's any help".

I have been here 5 years, am now a US citizen, and I still have days where it is difficult. I, like you, live in a small town but have found the people here to be wonderful. They wanted to befriend the new people in town, because we were a little "different" and have been very supportive of our current situation (long story) and we have made some great friends. But this didn't happen overnight.

I can remember the feeling of loneliness when I first got here. The cultural differences were hard, particularly because other people couldn't see them - we spoke the same language (sorta), we ate the same food (kinda), they thought it was just like moving from one state to another. Going to the supermarket would bring me out in a cold sweat! I felt like a fool as I tried to open cabinets from the other side, when I constantly pulled on door handles to get out, when I asked for things that they had different names for. It was hard and would take me four times as long as it would at home! lol I can laugh now, but it wasn't at all funny at the time.

I was upset that my daughter wasn't happy here - schooling was so different here. She did well though, after many evenings crying at the dining room table. But now she is so happy. She is in her second year of university and had many, many, friends, and she is loving the independence she has here, living in dorms, having her own car, etc.

I am thankful that I had a husband that was very supportive, did everything he could to make the transition easier. He had the patience of a saint! We had good days and bad days - have had only a couple of "major" arguments, usually through total misunderstandings. If it weren't for him, I would not choose to live in the US. I loved the place I lived in before I came here - it was only love that bought me here.

It will get easier for you, if you have the support of your husband. It can be difficult for them to see the reasons you are upset, or angry, sometimes and I think the only way round this is to talk. Talk a lot, tell him how you feel and ask for his help when you need it. Sometimes just going for a walk, when he gets home, is a good time to get everything off your chest and you will have his undivided attention.

Keep your chin up! It takes a while and some don't ever feel this place is "home" but it can come very close, if you let it.

Hugs

G.

Personally, and this is only my personal opinion, I think you have a pretty good attorney. She has kept you updated with the situation and has tried to explain, diplomatically, how the USCIS and NBC works. There may be rules and dates and processing times they are supposed to meet, but in reality it isn't that simple. Rarely do they meet deadlines and many others are in your situation, waiting, waiting, waiting, for one thing or another. When it comes to requesting information as to why certain applications are taking forever, there are specific times you have to wait before you can even submit a question to them! This appears to be the problem with your I-129F and she is right, you can only wait for now. Frustrating I know.

If they are going to issue an RFE with regard to your I-130 you will probably hear soon. She is suggesting filling out the waiver paperwork because she suspects (and probably with good reason, due to her experience) that this is what is going to be required. You have two choices really, you can pay the $1000 and have her prepare it for Adiel to take with him, so he has it on hand. The alternative is to get there, find he needs a waiver and then there if further delay, which can be considerable. It is good that she has requested an "update" and she should hear back with regard to that soon.

I don't think contacting your congressional representatives or senators will help much - they have never helped us and just ask the same questions any of us can ask, really. That's just my experience in dealing with them. I suspect that is why your attorney hasn't even bothered mentioning it. You can request them to help, they will ask you to sign a paper allowing them to request information on your behalf, but they only get the same information your attorney and yourself will, if you put in a request for information.

I don't feel that his ethnicity is the reason for any of the delays, although others on VJ may be able to confirm this one way or another. I think it is just down to huge backlogs that have accumulated in the USCIS, NBC, State Department and FBI. The whole immigration process is just a mess at the moment and the government seem to be placing their focus on how to deal with the problems of "undocumented" aliens over those that are going through the preferred process.

I don't know what happens when you are already married and coming to visit your spouse in the US. I know that you would need to show "ties" to your country of origin to prove that you are not entering to circumnavigate the required immigration process, such as mortgage papers, or a lease, a letter from an employer, bank details, that kind of thing. I am sure there are others on VJ that can advise you on that.

Hang in there! I can only imagine this is torture for you. For what it's worth, to me it sounds like you have a good attorney. She is doing all the right things, she is keeping you informed (which is more than our attorney does) and she seems sympathetic to your concerns.

It will all be over, soon I hope, and you will be able to enjoy married life together. Keep that goal in mind and you will get through this.

Hugs

G.

Dear Mireya,

This is just to update you on the two petitions you filed last year for Adiel. I completely understand your frustration with the terrible delay for both petitions and here is what I found :

1-129F : USCIS / National Benefits Center is currently processing K3-K4 applications filed on July 17th, 2006. Your petition was filed on July 18th, 2006 (can you believe it?). So, it has not even been processed yet. Apparently, there is a terrible backlog at the National Benefits Center and therefore, this horrible delay.

So, for this petition, it is not outside the processing time and there is nothing we can do about it except wait.

2. I-130 : I called USCIS to inquire about the unusual delay in the processing of your I-130 Petition. It is already way out of the NORMAL processing time. They could not tell me exactly why this is the case but indicated that it is possible that they are going to issue a request for further evidence. This is just speculation and could be with regard to either the issue of the marriage such as the issue of the parties not residing together or they are doing some kind of background check. I believe that they are taking precautions with regard to persons of certain ethnic origin and especially from the UK and some Middle Eastern countries. With this, the agent told me that all I can do right now is to put in a service request for information / update, which I have already done yesterday. They will contact me or you directly with this update / status or request for further evidence. This will apparently happen within 45 days. I calculated that we should hear something about the I-130 no later than March 8th, 2007. Please let me know if you hear anything before the expiry of this date.

Mireya, I am sorry about this. I hope that you understand that this delay is beyond my control. Each case is treated and processed on its own merits. Your case is a little unusual and of course, is complicated by Adiel's summary exclusion, reasons for which are still totally unknown to anyone except them.

Best regards,

XXXXXXXXXXX

Attorney at Law

Now in regards to the thing that she is calling "summary exclusion" she is referring to my husband being denied entry last year in Feb, when he tried to come in for a visit at which time he was held over night and denied entry on his passport for "immigrant intent" . He was turned around and put on the next flight back to the UK the next day. Before we got married he entered the USA with out a problem. We were told by an immigration officer tha beacuse he ws not married to a USC he could no longer enter to visit on his British VWP

When we got married we did not file for any type of visa immediately after because we both had other things to sort out in regards to jobs and school and family. We got married unexpectedly on his last visit to Texa. Our original plans were to get married latter in 2006 but we just could not wait and we took the big step. After we got married he left back to the UK and I remained in TX. 2005 was a tough year. Due to natural disastsers *hurrican Rita, financial strain and because we both had new jobs we were not able to see each other for over a year because we had no allocated vacation and money was tight. Well when we finally got every thing in order we planed for Adiel to come and visit so that we could prepare a Catholic ceremony and get the visa process started. We got married unexpectedly and our plans were to save money and have a more formal ceremony latter with our family and friends. We only had a civil marriage and an Islamic one in a Masjid where only him and I were present with four witnesses and that was it.

Our plans were not for Adiel to stay here but for him to go back to the UK until the whole visa process was complete. Adjusting status here after we got married was not a possibility because he has two small children that he has from a past girlfriend who he needs to provide for. As you can imagine with that kind of responsibility he can’t be with out work for too long. Well to make the long story short when he tried to return latter for a visit we were totally shocked when he was denied because he had never had a problem entering the USA before. This is the complete time line of events:

04/16/03 Met online

08/16/04 Mireya flies to UK to meet Adiel

08/21/04 Trip to Greece

09/02/04 We return to London

09/05/04 Mireya returns to the Texas :0(

12/13/04 Adiel flies to Houston

12/31/04 We bring in the new years with a bang we get MARRIED!

01/06/05 Adiel returns to London.

08/ / 05 Adiel visit to Texas gets canceled because hurricane Rita.

02/12/06 Adiel is refused entry on VWP and both him and I are interrogated by FBI officials at Houston Intercontinental airport. We are both clueless as to this. I was not allowed to see him and he was not allowed to see me. The FBI asked me the weirdest questions like: How many times a day does he pray, has he ever said any thing against the USA, when was the last time he went to a mosque, is that ring on your finger from him or from another marriage? Where does he work, what does he do? How did you meet?

03-04/ 06 Gather fees and all paper work to start K-3

05/23/06 K3 process begins (see time line below)

05/26/06 Mireya goes to UK to be with my baby for a few days THANK YOU GOD!

06/12/06 Mireya returns to Texas :0(

12/26/06 Mireya goes to UK to be with hubby for the holidays

01/02/07 Mireya back to Texas =0(

Our K3 Timeline

12/31/2005 Married

I-130

05/23/06 I-130 was sent to TSC.

05/30/06 Received Dated

06/15/06 NOA1 Receipt issued

06/20/06 NOA1 arrived in the mail

09/13, 14 /06 Touched Address change

I-129F

06/24/06 Sent I-129 to Chicago NBC

07/13/06 Received Date

07/18/06 NOA1 Receipt issued

07/21/06 NOA1 arrived in mail

08/10, 17, 19 /06 Touched

09/11, 12, 13 /06 Touched Address change

10/22/ 06 Touched

10/27/ 06 Touched Letter saying they need more time for additional review. =0(

11/14/ 06 Touched

11/15/ 06 Touched

Some one please touch us!

Any ways what do you think about what the lawyer has said in regards to why our case might be difficult because we got married and we have not live together? Also it pissed me off that she did not even mention lets try and contact a congressman or senator to make an inquiry. At lease I had sense enough to do that. Apparently she has no clue that even though my application has a receipt for July 18, applications that were submitted way after me have already been approved. =0( My husband is Pakistani but he was born and raised in London and has only been to Pakistan about 2 times when he was like 3 yrs old and some other time when he was in his late teens early 20’s. He is currently 36. I hate the fact that the lawyer implies that because of his ethnicity or maybe even religion we are having such difficulties with the applications. Is the lawyer correct in stereotyping? What are your thoughts to her comments? Is she correct in saying that my husbaned was summaryly exluded is that the term for people that are denied on VWP and refused entry? Am I over reacting? I forgot to mention that this lawyer also wants to charge 1,000 extra to prepare a waiver for my hubby for him to have ready and take to his interview in case they ask him to file a waiver because he was refused last time he tried to come and visit me. Hsi passport got an ugly " refused-intent to immigrate" stamp. She says he is not sure if he will or will not need it but in the event that he does not need the waiver he will have it ready. She is not sure if the waiver will be needed but she chis chargeing 1,000 regardless if they ask for it or not because she is going to "prepare it for him to have at the interview in case they as for one." Let me know your feed back on this also.

The lack of extra income didn't bother me. However, I thought/think that it shows the total lack of respect that my ex has for his son by allowing himself to wallow in this no income situation. An adult who thinks it's ok to live off the state for years, not a very good role model. Sadly, I know that he sees himself as a victim and has no idea how to help himself.

It is sad when absent parents see themselves as a victim, and in some cases the parent with care and control of the children can make them feel that way. I have known many women that felt the money side of things is what made you a good parent - it isn't. Spending time with them, explaining that they are in no way to blame for the situation, enjoying being with them and having fun, and most-importantly not using the time to "bash" the other parent.

I understand what you are saying about the "wallowing in self pity" and yet he didn't seem to make much of an effort to find work to allow him to provide a better life for his child, but once you allow yourself to get low like that it is really very difficult to pull yourself out of it! It does show a lack of respect for the child, but it shows lack of respect for yourself moreso, in my opinion.

It is difficult bringing up children on your own, but the rewards of being able to say to yourself "I didn't do such a bad job" is tremendous!