jom

I have to agree that TB is a big issue with the visa journey. To have peace of mind I actually had a chest x-ray a month before my actual medical exam at St. Lukes.

When it came out negative I was very confident and didn't worry about the other tests.

Myla

VJ has an extensive guide on what PRIMARY documents you have to bring during the interview ( Click on the guide )

For additional proofs, especially establishing a bonafide marriage you will need the following:

1. Letters or cards addressed to you both as Mr and Mrs or to you showing the marital address;

2. Your name included in the house utilities bills ( power, water, cable etc)

3. Joint bank accounts ( get ready with bank statements )

4. You as the beneficiary of your husband's life insurance or 401K or other insurances ( medical, vision, dental )

5. Both your names showing ownership of properties ( house, boat, car )

6. Credit cards showing your married name, or both your name

7. Pictures, pictures pictures..wedding pics, also those that show family activities, expecially with in-laws, step children

Maybe the others can add.

Goodluck on the journey.

Tried using it here but gave my husband a headache beacuse of MSG ...but you can usually find it in most asian store, particularly in Filipino stores , if you have any in your area.

You have a very efficient fiancee who thinks ahead of time

It is never too early to start getting things ready. If any problem arises with her documents at least she can address it now rather than panick when the interview is already near.

Goodluck on the journey.

I dont understand why are you are so pissed off about my statement, I was just stating a FACT. Thats why I said, what a sari sari store ( with an exclamation point) because it is so successful. Dont be so defensive . I was actually complimenting you. One thing is, I dont BS here , everybody knows that. I dont know how much a call center personnel make but good for them if they make good money. I am not in competition with anybody, just making a statement.

Cool it man and goodluck with the sari-sari store

sorry that you think i am pissed off at your statement, but you got me all wrong.. was just calling you out on what i believe you really meant... i just felt it was irrelavent to draw a comparison between a lawyer and store owner in the PI. of course, it would probably be more valid here in the US. anyhow, if you were in fact being sincere and complimenting, i apologize. just next time, compliment someone by replying to their post directly, and not to a string of counterproductive posts. kinda comes across ingenuine ya know? anyhow, all sarcasm and undertones out the window, is it too late to accept your compliment??? ;p

If I remember right , your post that I replied to was under a string of counterproductive posts so I just kinda followed it:) I am not really good at editing the posts so I just replied to your post as it was.

To clear the "issue", I grew up in a small town in Mindanao where there is a "sari-sari" store in probably every two blocks. A sari-sari store, as I experenced it is no bigger than a bedroom, you start with a capital of 500 to 1000 pesos . Ive talked to several neighbors before and they said they clear like 100 to 200 pesos a day profit. This was the basis of my comparison. If you were more specific with your FIRST POST, about the area, the goods involved, and not just the amount of profit , I would not have reacted as I did, and as what the others did ( disbelief) when you mentioned a 50,000 monthly profit for a sari sari store. Your fiancee probably has a grocery store which is bigger and more goods sold compared to a typical Filipino sari-sari store.

I don't mind being called out, but I do mind being called a BS caller because I am not one. And I am always sincere with my posts.

Your fiancee is a good businesswoman and you are lucky that you found a Filipina who is financially independent and is hardworking.

Ive made my point, goodluck.

This is not a bash anyone thread.. It is a genuine question if missing something in the culture. I am embarrassed to even ask this.

I give my fiancée 300 american dollars for support each month. It is never enough though. I realize 300 a month is not a great deal, but should be enough to live on or am I way off here? It is starting to really hurt our relationship at this point because within 15 days she has gone through the 300 this month, and asking for more even though have asked her to budget money since I am sadly not a rich man. Would someone please illuminate the situation?

ConfuseDone.....

I have gone trough the same and then I recalled an old saying;

Give them a fish and feed them for one day....teach them how to fish and they feed themselves for a lifetime.....

After talking it over, any money i have sent was to be used ONLY and ONLY start and expand a very small bussiness....

While there were some false starts and training and adjustment along the way, now it is self sufficient and very little handouts or acceptance of any handouts....

I am sorry to say but some and I say some....not all.....have problems handling money or budget.....so some training is required.

Best Wishes...

well said! i use to send my fiance ~$150/mo just so she could be comfortable, as she still lived with her parents. she wasnt working, but was looking for a job. so ~8months ago, i sent her the capital to start a Sari-sari store.. costed me $800 smackers... anyway, she's been making a killing since... she nets approximately 40-45 thousand pesos monthly, and will have a 'lil business to leave to her family when she comes here. haven't been sending her any money. and she's already saved up enough money for her medical exam, fees, and plane ticket to the US! now that's teaching to fish!! ;p cheers!

There you go....you see there are SUCCESS stories after all (not just mine!!)....

Don't you buy that #######, bubba. $800 capital to net $900 a month? Sounds like a fisherman catchin' an anchovy and tellin' everybody that it's a 50 pound albacore. Well, I'll shut my mouth!

It's impossible to have a net income like that from a sari-sari store I agree. Maybe it's a money lending business?

So what...

you get a gift for paying back on time...

baseball bat does the jobs on the KNEEs for late payments...

I didn't make that much monthly working in the Philippines as a lawyer. What a sari-sari store!!!

No, am not a fisherman, nor am I statistician. try googling sari-sari stores and you will find others threading how to set one up, and estimated startup capital, and average earnings.... you all shouldn't be so DARN quick to call BS, even if you happen to be a LAWYER. i doubt you BS-callers were ever former sari-sari owners, so frankly, you just wouldnt know. i am a doctor still in residency here in the US (anyone feel like calling BS on that too??!! ;p) and i agree, i would make NOTHING in PI. being a filam, having visited PI all my life, i am aware of what professionals make there... oh, and the average call-center operator would make more then you too, miss lawyer..

anyhow, for those actually interested.. starting capital $800. drinks, alcohol, candy, cigarettes, rice are some of the hot items. LOCATION is also a huge factor.. She actually found one of the apartments/store combo for 3taw per month. NO lending. Daily sales range from P2,800-4,000, with a mark-up ranging from 25-35%. Open 24hrs most of the time ( mybe 5% closure time, guessing) She is almost always able to set 1,000 pesos aside daily toward savings. Also, during afternoon and into evening, her mother sells bbq right in front of the store, which has consistently netted ~1,000 per day (1,500 bbq costs, sells for 2,500). mother sells bbq ~3-5 days out of the week. do the math... and if still confused, puzzled, perplexed, behooved, PM me and i will point you in the right direction! ;p

it is alot of work and maintainance in my opinion. For my fiance, it's a 3person job, her, mother, and younger brother. but the proceeds are large enough to support them....

anyhow, sorry for the ramble, was longer than i planned.. am post-call right now, and just got off work.. 30hrs straight makes you very loopy. ;p I will end with this adage: "Ignorance is BLISS!!!!!" ;p Cheers!!

I dont understand why are you are so pissed off about my statement, I was just stating a FACT. Thats why I said, what a sari sari store ( with an exclamation point) because it is so successful. Dont be so defensive . I was actually complimenting you. One thing is, I dont BS here , everybody knows that. I dont know how much a call center personnel make but good for them if they make good money. I am not in competition with anybody, just making a statement.

Cool it man and goodluck with the sari-sari store

This is not a bash anyone thread.. It is a genuine question if missing something in the culture. I am embarrassed to even ask this.

I give my fiancée 300 american dollars for support each month. It is never enough though. I realize 300 a month is not a great deal, but should be enough to live on or am I way off here? It is starting to really hurt our relationship at this point because within 15 days she has gone through the 300 this month, and asking for more even though have asked her to budget money since I am sadly not a rich man. Would someone please illuminate the situation?

ConfuseDone.....

I have gone trough the same and then I recalled an old saying;

Give them a fish and feed them for one day....teach them how to fish and they feed themselves for a lifetime.....

After talking it over, any money i have sent was to be used ONLY and ONLY start and expand a very small bussiness....

While there were some false starts and training and adjustment along the way, now it is self sufficient and very little handouts or acceptance of any handouts....

I am sorry to say but some and I say some....not all.....have problems handling money or budget.....so some training is required.

Best Wishes...

well said! i use to send my fiance ~$150/mo just so she could be comfortable, as she still lived with her parents. she wasnt working, but was looking for a job. so ~8months ago, i sent her the capital to start a Sari-sari store.. costed me $800 smackers... anyway, she's been making a killing since... she nets approximately 40-45 thousand pesos monthly, and will have a 'lil business to leave to her family when she comes here. haven't been sending her any money. and she's already saved up enough money for her medical exam, fees, and plane ticket to the US! now that's teaching to fish!! ;p cheers!

There you go....you see there are SUCCESS stories after all (not just mine!!)....

Don't you buy that #######, bubba. $800 capital to net $900 a month? Sounds like a fisherman catchin' an anchovy and tellin' everybody that it's a 50 pound albacore. Well, I'll shut my mouth!

It's impossible to have a net income like that from a sari-sari store I agree. Maybe it's a money lending business?

So what...

you get a gift for paying back on time...

baseball bat does the jobs on the KNEEs for late payments...

I didn't make that much monthly working in the Philippines as a lawyer. What a sari-sari store!!!

Ok......here is the problem.......Yesterday I sent my girl some money because I figured she was running low when I talked to her last night I gave her the money control # and she got all mad because she didn't ask me for any money she said that she feels ashamed and doesn't want me to feel that she is using me????? Did I do something wrong? I don"t know how to react??? I feel bad but at the same time I want to tell her just to take it and be quiet but not rudely!!!! It wasn't even that much just enough that she can get to the cafe each day and for her computer time!!!!! She also said that she budgeted the money I gave her last week so she didn't need it!!!! What did I do that was so wrong?

How did you figure she was running low when you talked to her?

If she is not a registered nurse in the state where she is situated, it is difficult to find a job as an RN.

I am an RN too but they would not even hire me as a nursing assistant without being registered as a CNA here so I had to take the course and state board. I am working as a CNA now and also reviewing for my NCLEX.

First step is to have her Philippine nursing license registered here in America.

Goodluck

Just an update. Below is an email from Haley's Mom last night.

"Dear Friends and Family,

As many of you are aware, our daughter, Haley Marie , fell victim to a brain tumor this past Friday. The day started with a visit to the pediatrician office and ended in the ER with CT and MRI testing. We were informed that Haley had a tumor growing on her cerebellum, located in the lower-right quadrant of her brain. Naturally, it wasn't news that either Tom or I was expecting, and it hit us pretty hard.

Three days later, Haley has made it in and out of major brain surgery and is doing quite well. Of course, she is experiencing some "normal" side effects, but the good news is that the neurosurgeons were able to remove the entire tumor! The tumor measured about three centimeters in length and was encapsulated (this is good news). Originally, the CT and MRI scans showed that the tumor was wrapped around the main brain stem, which when removed would affect the cranium nerves 6, 7, 8, and 9. If any of these nerves were hit in surgery, Haley could have suffered loss of vision, hearing, droopy face syndrome and/or major nerve damage. However, when they performed the surgery and opened her up, the tumor was "loose and ready for them to remove. There was no connection to the brain stem." This is a MIRACLE.

Haley is scheduled for numerous testing and may have to undergo chemo therapy and/or radiation treatment in order to prevent any further abnormal cell growth in her brain. We are so grateful that Haley is alive and thank all of you for your prayers. Please continue to keep Haley in your thoughts, as we aren't out of the woods yet. We still are waiting to hear from Pathology to discover exactly what type of tumor it was and there is a 48 window that is crucial for infection.

Thank you for your love and prayers,

Christina and Tom "

Thank you all for the prayers.

Joe and Myla

This is our niece Haley, she is now in the operating room to have a tumor removed from her brain. The operation will last 12 to 14 hours because the tumor is pressing on her brain stem and the doctor has to resect and test, resect and test.

Please say a prayer for her.

Than you very much

Joe and Myla

My 2 1/2 year old niece Haley ( daughter of my husband's nephew) is now in the operating room of Florida Children's Hospital to have a quart size tumor removed from her brain. The tumor is pressing on her brain stem so the operation will take 12 to 14 hours because the doctor will have to resect and test, resect and test.

She is such a wonderful child .

Please, for those who will open and read this topic, do say a prayer for her.

Thank you very much.

Joe and Myla

This is Haley.

My nephews daughter, she is only 2 1/2 years old ( from husband's side) will undergo brain surgery tomorrow. We were there to visit her today and my heart just goes out to her and the family. She is too young to undergo such a delicate operation.

Please say a prayer for her ( her name is Haley)

Tomorrow is definitely a labor day for me since I will be working.

Myla is doing great. The good news is she finally got her authorization to take the NCLEX-RN exam after 7 months of credential evaluation. She has been working as a CNA since January and we are working hard to have a baby. Since driving by herself for a year now, no accidents and no tickets. Our lifting of conditions is due June next year. No plans to go back to the Philippines yet since her Mom is coming over for a visit next year.

Its been a year and 10 months since we got married and everyday is getting better.

We are the Florida Marauders

In which league? VJ?

Do you have a lineup?

Yahoo fantasy football. My husband takes care of this stuff and we were in third place last year. I will talk to him about the VJ league

Thanks

I also do Joe's hair.

I wish I can do that do my Eddie's. But he's got a lot of hair compared to Joe! Just kiddin', Myla.

Thats the best part of it..just zoom zoom and Im done

If you were married before, don't forget a copy of your divorce decree. We submitted one when filing the petition but still they asked me for a certified copy during my interview.

Goodluck to your fiancee.

My husband and I consolidated HIS credit cards ( I said HIS because they were already there even before we got married ) with one bank that offered him 0%APR for 12 months, thats how we escaped paying the interest. We are now just paying for the principal and almost done with it. His credit cards are in the freezer and will only be used if there is really an emergency.

When it comes to child support..ahhhhh..he pays a lot monthly to the lazy ex wife,lol. I wish he only pays $35 but its $1,050 a month for the two boys. The amount was based on his income 5 years ago because the ex has never worked during their less than 5 years marriage. In addition, he also pays for their medical , dental and vision insurances.

When it comes to bills, we divide. He pays for the house utilities, boat , credit card and house mortgage while I pay for my car, insurances ( 2 vehicles and boat ) and I do most of the grocery shopping. Despite my husband's generous income we really don't have a lot of extra cash because we stopped using the credit cards and also a portion of our paycheck goes to savings ( this is a must !!!!)

There is no imposition on my part to pay BUT as his partner , I should. I don't send any money to the Philippines because our household expenses come first and foremost. We are not rich but are genuinely happy with everything we have. Our number one rule is to live within our means.

When I started working and received my first full paycheck , the first thing we did was sit down and made a sheet of what our bills are and who will pay. We both get our paychecks the same time and pay our bills first, then we stock up our fridge for food. I pay $48 for my phone monthly and don't have text services because I dont need it and with that I save $25 a month. When I go shopping I don't go for the brand ( except for laundry soap because I always use Tide) but whatever is the cheapest. I am not trying to advertise here but when I go for my major grocery shopping, I save a lot in Walmart for non meat items and I go to Win-dixie for meat stuff because they always have a buy one take one. My husband loves steak ( a lot!!) so I make sure that once a week he gets to eat one( He works hard for it and deserves one). Eating out probably happens once a month because we like cooking and eating at home.

We don't go to bars ( been there done that ) and most of our free days we go fishing or just boating . Joe loves the water and it is an inexpensive treat for all of us.

I don't use the dryer for our clothes . I hang them and let the FL sun do its job It saves us a lot of money. I clean my own nails, do my own hair treatment and facials I also do Joe's hair. Temp of our house is maintained at 80 during the day and 79 at night and when summer is over, we love the fresh air. These are just some of the things we do on our own to save money.

Sit down, make a list and work your budget. As what the others correctly said, cut off some of your unnecessary expenses and always follow the rule to live within your means. We also went through some tough times when we just got started but if you work things out together and listen to one another , take things one step at a time and learn how to prioritize, you will be just fine.

Goodluck and hope things will be better for the two of you

Had no problems with Myla. She is a good and safe driver and she didn't even drive back in the Philippines because she had her own driver. Well ,she has been driving by herself for a year now and so far no accidents and no tickets. She will have her 4th trip to Tampa Int Airport this morning when she will send me off to PA.

She would tell everyone she had a good teacher ...ME

Wait for him to come home and talk.

One way you can check is looking at his passport, when he is back, then you will see the date of his entry to Taiwan and or Japan.

If indeed he is cheating ( which I think he is ), make a decision. It is either you two will work it out or the marriage is done.

You are in my prayers.

We are the Florida Marauders

Thank you everyone for the input.

Good day

From a wife's point of view with a husband who also travels a lot, you need to sit down and voice out your concerns. If I were in your shoes I would be suspicious too.

My husbands works from home 20 days a month ( except Saturdays and Sundays of course ) and travels the rest of the days. He is a commissioning engineer and travels as far as Minnesotta to "solve" problems in power plants. When he is on travel we probably talk in the phone 10 to 15 times a day. He calls when he boards, when he lands, when he has checked in the hotel and before going to bed. We also chat before sleeping. The next day, he calls early morning, calls when he leaves the hotel to go to the power plant, calls when he gets there, calls when he leaves and calls again when he is back in the hotel and the same routine everyday while he is away. I have no reason to be suspicious.

I am not saying that your husband do the same as what myhusband does but it is very important to communicate and he should at least do that to keep you from worrying.

I hope everything will be better.

Wow, Myla... I'm sorry you are in this uncomfortable position of feeling loyalty to your sister and also caring about your brother-in-law. How long have they been married now?

Here's my honest opinion - since you don't know for certain what your sister is up to, and since Tom seems to know the score between himself and his wife, I would hold off on saying anything. Before you do say something to Tom, you should confront your sister on the phone and then ask her. If she is in fact, in another relationship, then tell her that she needs to come forward to tell Tom. I'd even give her the ultimatum that if she doesn't tell him, then you will.

Its my first cousin not my sister. If its my li'l sis, ill probably use a slipper to smack her head

I see it as he knew what she ( him the OP ) was like before but allowed this man to get involved and marry ####### he should have opened his mouth before she came to the US not know that the man is involved in her life and the life of the kids. Now it is too late IMHO If the man she is with is that blind then whatever. I would recommend a good condom for any future contct with his wife though may he will get the hint this way??

OP is HER..I had no way of telling Tom because I have not met him until we visited my cousin in Ohio last year. My cousin lived in another island when we were still in the Philippines. I was also busy with work and my own visa processing.

Anyhow, thank you for your thoughts.