IfoemaUS

I have a lot of experience with the whole mixed family situation and interpersonal problems between spouses. The short of it is, the parents should be focused on what is best for the children and step away from any conflicts that might be between the two parents. Standard divorce protocol. Our daughter was adopted from Guatemala at the age of 9 after a 1 week stay with us in the U.S. and 5 days in Guatemala. The adjustment of bringing a 9 year old into a new country and family was extremely difficult all around. My wife and I come to find out could not get on the same page about child rearing on top everything else. Also, our daughter bonded with me but only had a surface attachment to her mother which went away in 2 years to almost no attachment. My ex is BPD but that is another story. Now, my daughter is going to have to adjust to a new member of the family. The easy part is there will be no "Stepmother" situation. That was something my daughter and I talked about a lot. However, we will be 3 adults in the same house and respect will be needed all around. I think the toughest part will be my daughter understanding that's it just not Papa anymore and he will be focusing less on her. All things being said... minimize the drama, take your time, allay the fears your ex may have about the kids but don't let him bully you. Watch your kids and your fiance's reactions, words and body language for signs of trouble. Properly, balance the relationship triangle between you, your fiance and your children. My ex certainly has an valid vested interest in our daughter. But, everything else is off limits. My daughter knows if my ex gets nosy to tell her to talk to me directly. Relationships are a tricky thing and require thoughtful, respectful, common sense approaches.

The thing is, I have been in the same situation when he married...circumstances were a bit different but same outcome. I found out through 3rd parties that he was engaged and then later when they married...but he wants to have advanced notice of my actions. He claims he only did it because he married the one that finally ended our marriage and he knew how I would feel...however, this is supposed to be about our kids and I didn't get the same consideration he wants. He says the difference is they were exposed to her (never mind the fact that it was under scandalous circumstances) so that makes his point valid. The thing is, I have no issue with him speaking to or meeting my fiance...also ask the kids how they feel, but I do not feel he has rights whatsoever in regards to my personal life and I will make sure the kids meet him before he moves in.

Husband is Nigerian, I am a American. HE CAME ON A K1 visa and was approved without any RFEs

Hello,
My husband's from Abuja, Nigeria. Are you referring to the immunizations needed for the medical? I see that you just started the K1 process so just want to be sure . In times past my husband got his immunizations/medical done at Children's Place in Lagos. The other acceptable place for medicals would be Q-Life Family Clinic.
(1) Dr. Funmi Alakija
Q-Life Family Clinic
Plot 155A Prince Ade Odedina Street
Off Ajose Adegun,
Victoria Island Annexe
Lagos, Nigeria
(2) The Chidlren's Practice
25, Raymond Njoku Street, Ikoyi, Lagos.

Hubby(the USC) has a Canadian associates degree, and applied to finish his degree here in the US. The university he applied to told him to go through WES. They did it really fast & accurate. https://www.wes.org/

While trying to work in the field of your degree , as Goldengate said your best bet would be to get started is to go to a temp agency. It's the way my husband found his job and most of the other immigrants he met also had their start that way. It's tough out there!

It took my husband 5 months to get his first job and it was a crappy one. He sent literally hundreds and hundreds of resumes and no one was willing to hire him in his field with no US experience, so he took a job at Walmart that was a nightmare. After 10 months and sending hundreds more resumes he got an internship position in his field. After 4 months they hired him full time with a great salary and benefits. So total of 14 months from when he entered the US until he got his dream job, which he loves. He is a computer engineer.
My suggestion is to make sure your resume is up to US standards and go to careerbuilder.com, dice.com, monster.com, set up accounts on those sites and upload your resume. Apply for jobs in your field and also set up a profile on LinkedIn.com with your resume and other details. Hang in there, it takes time. The economy is still rough, even for US citizens educated here with work experience here. Good luck!

This is correct....they may be using a 3rd party service and not direct from the bureaus.

Thanks so much for the replies everyone. I have plenty of phone records and chatting so hopefully that will suffice. I sent my petition in before finding the site and I was very thorough but not sure if I sent enough in evidence which were mainly pics.