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    GerardoO153 reacted to mushroomspore in Bomb drop...in-laws want to immigrate to USA. HELP   
    My parents (more specifically,  my mother) has made "jokes" about me petitioning their immigration to the US after I become a citizen. It has never progressed to any serious discussion but nonetheless, it is a majorly hard-cold NO from me. You're an adult. You're allowed to say no. "No" is a full sentence. You're allowed to enforce whatever boundaries you have to with your in-law's for the sake of your mental health and that does not make you selfish. Trust me, I went through therapy for 1 year (as a full-grown adult in her 20's!) and it took me that long to untie myself from those feelings too; I felt like a bad person for wanting to say "no" to my strict/overbearing parents, even after I had moved away from Canada and to the US. But that said, since it's your wife's family, it's really on her to enforce the boundaries. If you want her to grasp how serious this could be for you guys, one idea would be to go together to an appointment with a lawyer and possibly even a marriage counselor to drive home into your wife's head how uncomfortable you are with this situation and how it would affect your marriage/lifestyle.
    Just wanna add....your wife would be able to petition her mother right away if your wife is now a citizen (which it looks like she is). But your wife's sister will be waiting, at minimum, 1 decade. Most likely longer.
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