MrsBruce5

I understand you completely Gary.

My prayers and thoughts are with Luz and her family, and also with you Gary.

Culture shock is definitely a reality and an aspect that even if one is aware of, cannot actually always know what to expect or how to handle. It can be frightening to both because it seems as if there is something wrong, but it isn't always something tangible or conscious that can be described.

Mixed in with all of the immigrant's feelings can be that of what the American feels...a big part of that being guilt. Guilt because we can't seem to help....guilt because of what the other has given up for us....guilt because we think that either we or the life here has somehow disappointed our significant other....guilt because we think they would have been happier not coming here...guilt when they say, "I had to throw that away" or "I miss this or that". It's a horrible helpless feeling and can cut to the core of us when we feel our significant other has been let down in some way.

Thank you for saying this. I have such guilt sometimes as the USC that it cripples me, and turns itself into resentment. My husband is very close to his family and many times, I feel like they hate me, although they have been nothing but kind and good to me. Whether there is resentment on their parts or not, I will never know. I am a talker, and feel that communication is imperative to resolution. I have tried to bring the issue of my feelings to the table-trying to explain myself. I have done this with his famil via e-mail a few times, and my sister in law seems to understand me well, but my MIL just avoided the subject. Maybe it was too difficult for her to talk about, but it only made my guilt worsen, as she is the type who will say nothing if she hasn't anything nice to say. It hurt me that she would not address this. I didn't tell my husband for months, as he had enough to think about... When I finally told my husband about it-he did not understand, and simply defended his mother. Sometimes, he cannot see things through my eyes.

I expected once my husband came here, my feeling would lessen-but that was only the tip of the iceberg. He misses his old home alot, and I cannot help him, which leads to exaccerbation of my guilt because I feel that without me, he would not have such heartache.

Sometimes, my guilt overcomes me.

I have to say, I believe her words.

None of us were there, and don't know how it happened...but the end result is 2 people who take an incredible interest in their kids, making the world a better place, and they seem to have a fine partnership. I say more power to them-regardless of the how or when the relationship began.

Welcome !

You have found a fine place. I too, was in the midst of a divorce whilst we planned things out...

It seems like forever while it's happening, but all things are temporary. Hang in there and stick around here-good people and great and accurate information !

: )

Pauls a monkey hanger - hartlepool is REALLY close to newcastle. Does marrying someone from the area excuse your excessive drinking? Oops, just spilt booze on the keys...

Hahhaha ! Hi Joey ! Good to see you. You married a monkey hanger and I married a sheep shagger !

Doesn't say much for me ! Hhahahha !

She ... seems to believe that all people in the UK (Scots in particular) are all alcoholics

Yah....it's true though.

I have a strange feeling that you're from Newcastle, or close to it

No comment....

Yup...I KNEW it !!!!

She ... seems to believe that all people in the UK (Scots in particular) are all alcoholics

Yah....it's true though.

I have a strange feeling that you're from Newcastle, or close to it

Hi-

We were solid friends for a few years before any romance or meeting. It seemed like everyone else knew it was going to happen before we did ! Almost all of our friends, and family-on both sides of the Atlantic were very happy that both of us finally got together. It was no secret that neither of us had much luck in finding happiness in our past relationships. Needless to say, we've had a lot of support.

The only one who didn't give our relationship any support was my own mother. She's never seen him, met him, or even spoken with him. She's had prejudice in her heart from day one. She's led a very sheltered life, and seems to believe that all people in the UK (Scots in particular) and all alcoholics, and love to fight. I think Mom's been watching too much TV.

It used to bother me, but I stopped caring last year, and just got on with it. I gave up on selling his merits to her and I am much happier for accepting that there are some things will never be.

Rose

Hi-

I wish I could help you more, but I am not well informed. Best advice is to go on the waiver's forum and do some reading. If you can't find what you're looking for-post the question. I am sure you will find someone who knows...

Best of Luck !

Same time as Miami Ink, but there's always the DVR box !!!!

Thanks Marilyn-I am sure he's going to LOVE IT !!!

Oh My !

Tht sounds scarey !

I'd be willing to bet my last dollar that Mr. Bruce would be glued to the TV if I told him about it. He just loves that train wreck stuff.

We used to watch Flavor of Love when he first moved here, and it was one of his favorite shows...I think he's going to like this one too !

I couldn't open the link-when is it on ?

Hi,

Try NobleCom...We use it to phone the UK, at .2 cents a minute. The cards are worldwide, although rates vary. Still, it was the best price I saw after shopping for the last 2 years. It saved us A LOT of money when we were apart. He had one and I had one-$20.00/per month was our average re-charge for each card.

We spoke daily, for nearly an hour a day...

Yes-I would have paid $5 to join without a problem. I learned WAAAY more here than I did at the 3 attorney's offices I consulted with when we first began.

James' shortcuts were priceless to us, as our time apart was hellish...Also, where else can you go to get accurate and instant help for a question on an I-864 at 3:00am when you cannot sleep because you're fretting about it ?

VJ was a tool that helped us immensely. For me, it brought our family together much faster, which means more to me than ANYTHING. I would have paid a king's ransom just for that alone.

So, you'll be having haggis & gelt like us, eh ? LOL

Just eat what you can and freeze the rest !!

Enjoy, and Happy Hanukkah !

Good Luck to you guys !!!!!

Good luck on the interview !!!

Not much in the way of prejudice with the way my husband has been treated. Occasionally, people do not understand him, but that's really the worst of it...

If I could complain about anything, it would be that most people we meet ask him extensively about haggis, whiskey and Braveheart-which irritates the hell out of me (and him).

The other thing is older women who take me on the side and "warn" me, that I may be being used for a green card, so I should take his paycheck and sock money away, "just in case"...

Those parents need their heads examined.

No, they need their toes gnawed off by a dog.

Given that I have just been "outted", I will volunteer my services ...

I do have to agree, though, I feel the same way about it being a pit bull as MrsBruce5.

You'd feel the same way if MrsBruce5 gnawed off the baby's toes instead of the pit bull?

Hey...I though you agreed that we'd keep my toe gnawing problem just between us

I told you that in confidence !

How could you ???

Hi,

I read your other post, and I am SO glad he got there...

I don't know all the 'in"s and "out"s with a K1, as we did a CR1, but I wonder-can you not get the vaccines done at a civil surgeon in the states when you adjust status ?

Surely, someone with K1 experience here can clarify this ...

Karen, Beautifully said !

Well done.

EXCELLENT !!!!

I was thinking of the two of you and glad to hear that my good mojo reached you !!!

Good luck with the interview-it won't be long before he is home !!!

I tried to look up info on these dogs from the AKC, only to find out they're not an AKC recognized breed-anyone know why that might be?

And to comment on what Lisa said, what you're talking about covers the whole span of child abuse and neglect-it's all about people putting what they want over the needs of a child. In the case of that poor baby, it just happened to do with the dog.

Hi Henia,

You will not find them listed in AKC b/c th term "pit bull" is a street term-which sadly got affixed to the breed. The term is not recognized by AKC. Look up American Staffordshire Terrier and you find the breed at it's finest.

I agree, the parents should have looked after that child better.

I doubt a Chihuahua or a pomeranian would have chewed an infant's toes off.

If people want to have large dogs, that's fine...but in the prescence of infants and small children, it's not ideal imo. Even if there's the slightest chance of the dog overpowering the child, the dog should go. Maybe segregated elsewhere until the child is older, or look for adoption outside the home. It's not fair to the child to not childproof your home, and that includes the dog!

Agreed, with regard to childproofing- it is indeed a balancing act, having kids and pets.

No child should be left unsupervised with any animal. for any length of time. When my son has his friends over-the dogs go into the dog run outside. The bottom line is that they are animals, and lack reasoning skills we possess as humans, therefore it is incumbent on us to be responsible and vigilant.

However, I stick to my belief if any animal is that hungry-regardless of breed, or species-it will revert back to instinct.

I think it's terrible that the child's toes were chewed off. I just can't imagine parents being so neglectful. I do have to agree, though, I feel the same way about it being a pit bull as MrsBruce5. I very seriously doubt the breed of dog would have been mentioned had it been a lab, retriever, etc. I have a friend who has two pit bulls that are just the sweetest dogs you could imagine. They just had puppies and I will be purchasing one for my myself. I don't have kids yet but there are kids around and I plan on having kids one day. I don't think there will be an issue at all with having a pit bull in my house with my children.

I have one as well, and he is by far the best in my pack ( I also have a Boxer, Doberman and a Husky). If either myself, Mr. Bruce, or our son is having a bad day, it's not long before be will have his head in our laps looking at us with sympathetic eyes, offering us comfort. He is headstrong, and wants to lead us all-but not a mean bone in his body.

With all dogs, genetics will play a role (with regard to being dominant in a Pit's case)-however aggression is something that is taught. Unfortunately, this is all most people get to hear about and see-due to the sensationalism that the media spins...

But I digress-back to topic...

In no way am I saying the pup here was aggressive-I just think the poor little guy might have been hungry and did what ANY animal would have done.

Good luck with your Pitty ! They are exceptional friends.