qwerty1974

If it is love you will both wait, regardless of what either of you say now. I liked the comment though about not expectig her to be a hopeless romantic whilst you are being a pragmatist...that seems pretty insightful. We all have different personality make ups though and if you've been together for as many years as you say, she ought to be aware of this pragmatic, mature and bettering side of you and surely love you for it? It sounds likely a big part of who you are amd we try to support those we love in what matters to them (degrees, work, dreams etc). You say it 'must' be love because she's been with you for six years....yes, she HAS been with you- fully expecting it to end in a K1 visa and has by the sounds of it had fewer options to do anything else given her unemployment and the unfortunate failing of her last two nursing paper exams. I hope this is not the case for you but you perhaps ought to not concentrate of the first six years of it seeming to end up with a green card but rather also be open to seeing how it's been in the past two weeks since it seeming there won't be one anytime soon. Hopefully she revises this not waiting idea...if the embassy told me I'd have to do a whole load of paperwork and reapplication and it'd take another year or two i'd do it in a heartbeat. The CR1 seems a good alternative option, that way you can just scrap the K1 marry her and apply again for CR1 (I think it's cheaper), but I'd seriously recomend assessing whether this is the right girl for you or not. You don't want to be landed with someone who has said they will not wait, seems to refuse to work and is giving up on her nursing exam. From what I read it seems the onus is All on You to provide everything for this transition and she will not even provide patience. I don't know, maybe I'm reading it all wrong and when in love noone wants to or is willing to see these things but I have often heard people in LDR say they rather be with the person virtually than have anybody else Actually....however in your case she does not seem to feel this way. hopefully she was just coming from a place of anger and hurt and will change her mind about waiting for you. It IS an expensive process and really I've always thought more could be done to explain this to applicants at the beginning....give people a round figure of what the entire cost will be. We've also been pretty shocked by each cost lurking around every corner, it seems endless.

Ask yourself...each time you've acted on impulse....how has that worked out for you? That might help.

I was so sorry to read this thread. But you know, you're doing what you feel IS the right thing and noone can judge you on that...it IS the right thing if you feel so moved to do it. Your relationship will end up stronger for it as how you deal with this will truly show how strong and genuine the relationship is. My fiance knew all of the way trhough that if we needed to end this for financial reasons or for any of our children that we woul do just that, I made sure this was consistently communicated to him as we are both mature adults...no anger or recriminations. I just want to be with him, however long it takes or however many stops ands starts. So long as she knows you are truly making this decision for the right reasons you ought to have no problems at all. I'm sure she will realise that being angry or final about it will only make you doubt her intentions of marrrying you in the first place. Good luck with both of your degrees and fingers crossed that this time next year it'll be a different story

I would contact them

Thanks guys I m pretty certain I sent one for each of us with packet three buts it's relieving to know it's Not needed

Yes, that's what I had hoped. it's Embassy specific isn't it and I've double checked a few other posts since posting the above and London don't require it anyway. Fingers crossed.

So, I'm going through all of my documentation for the interview this week and I certainly HAD a renewed intent to marry letter from myself and my fiance..however, there's always something awry and I can't place my hands on my fiances (USC) one right now. Perhaps I sent it with packet three, would that make sense? The original was submitted with the petition in April...perhaps I can unearth it in my masses of paperwork but I wondered if any enlightened souls could tell me...is it even essential? Is it going to be hugely problematic if I cannot find it and did not send it with packet three?? Thanks in advance

I see no cause for red flags here, though I am not a USCIS worker. My fiance and I met online in December 2009, a relationship grew from that and we began seriously being 'together' in October of last year (though we 'knew' there was mroe to it before but tried to see other more realistic people~as in living in the SAME country!, but to no avail!) We met in April of this year and were engaged by May. When you know, you know, right?! We write, email and skype all of the time. We've been engaged seven months on the day of the final Embassy interview. They haven't approved us yet (hopefully that'll be next Friday), but certainly we've had no RFE's and never felt the time was an issue. Perhaps context would help; hes in his fifties and I'm late thirties/he's a doctor and I'm expecting to do my PhD over there and between us we've five children (none shared...obviously!)...maybe our age and circumstances help, who knows yet. Point is...in terms of time scales, you're not too dissimilar to us so I'd say if you love eachother and are prepared to show ongoing relationship....go for it. Just provide as much evidence (boarding passes, photocopies of envelopes of love letters sent back and forth etc) and photos of you together too. Good luck.

I'm sure keeping the passport can't be a bad sign. Good luck.

All of the above offer good advice, particularly skyping. Just make sure you are certain before making this step. If you have only JUST asked her to be your girlfriend then maybe you'll be able to enjoy the long K1 process...try for as many visits as possible during the interim

Call DOS as last poster stated Good luck!

If you wanted to I hear they are open to bringing it forward even more. Mine is the 2nd and I was thrilled to get it, but now I wish I'd rang through and asked for this week instead Congratulations though on your pre festive date

Congratulations

@Emma...I will do, we're at 9.30 am!! lols Thanks guys, massively helpful....as always

Thanks for that! I think the children will be disappointed, they're preparing themselves for a flashlight in the face interrogation lol I don't have a notarised letter from their father ('difficult' past relationship, hasn't seen them for twelve years nor supports them). He WAS however kind enough to whack his signature on the bottom of the letter a solicitor sent him informing him of our intentions. Naturally I figured that'd likely not be enough so had a public notary sign an affidavit to the effect there are no custody cases and that his signature there took seven months and that its the best we'll ever get from him. Fingers crossed it'll be enough- it has to be really or else its bye bye visa, he wouldn't ever be accommodating enough to get a notary sign anything, he simply does not care enough, nor would I contact him directly...not safe to. Do you think this might be okay? Granted I know you can only give an opinion but right now I ll take what I can get

p.s thanks for the flight tip...I m not flying myself, but I ll remember that for anyone else I hear of who is....you just don't think about things like that, i know I wouldn't!

LOL I swear I can hear them 'testing each other' Lord knows what on, but I heard some mention of 'so what's your favourite American TV show?!!!!) and some slight arguments over who gets to be the immigration officer and who gets to be the immigrant.....Jeez, this is going to be a long two weeks!!!

Yeah!, too true!!! :rofl: :rofl:

OR he might ACTUALLY be a decent guy. lol .

Has anybody gracing this forum ever had the pleasure of attending an interview accompanied by ones children?? My daughter is fifteen and my son is twelve and they're as anxious as I am about our December 2nd date. I'd love to be able to tell them what to expect, for example...will THEY be interviewed themselves too?!

I've had a scan on the London Embassys write ups but not found anything.

Huge thanks in advance...this is far more nerve wracking than any of us imagined, especially with there being little available to read, or at least little agreement anyway, on custody/release from country issues in complicated ex-relationships.

Good luck, the best of luck. Can't wait to hear all about it AND your good news

You would think though given that he made the poor girl wait 6 years for a proposal that he'd have put as much effort into learning which hand the ring is to go on??!! lols

I can't imagine what would possess them to be so obstructive, especially after you've worked so hard at this. I really and truly hope you make some headway with this. Best of luck to you

Sack the lawyer?!

It seems a very grey area where child custody is concerned. It also seems (Embassy dependent) that there is some arbitrary flexibility applied to such matters, perhaps it's IO dependent, not sure. I have a similar situation coming up with my interview in London next week....I guess it's just a situation of 'wait and see' because everyone seems to have had differing experiences of what is and is not required and at the consulate level there is little available to read about explicit requirements.

Was so relieved to get December that I immediately booked a hotel anyway and train tickets so can't move it anyway LOL!! To be honest though, getting the 2nd December was beyond my wildest imaginings so I'm happy with that. But yes, eight days....a whole world of difference. Kind of wish mine was this week instead of next :/

Super romantic!

I agree with CMoore25, getting and being pregnant is both a choice and avoidable (in most cases), so effectively if USCIS expedited on these grounds then it would be doing so because you CHOOSE for them to. When it's put That way it illustrates how unlikely that scenario would be! I really hope you manage to find some way around this. Also, they might consider it presumptive on the part of the beneficiary...what happens to the relationship and the child if the visa is not granted?