JenniferS

Connecticut.. contemplating driving up to Canada!! lol!!! Sad thing is, we were just in Montreal/Quebec a couple of weeks ago to celebrate his green card =) I think they only have it in Ontario though from what I can see?

I emailed one website in Australia but they don't ship internationally.. booo!!

My husband is in the same position, he is often very upset about it. His wage has been cut way more than half. In fact, he makes only slightly more than minimum wage. Only thing we can do for now is keep working the job he DOES have, it took a while for him to find the crappy one he is working, and keep looking in the meantime. Hopefully something better will come along, and hopefully the economy will start to improve. Everyday I feel guilty for us making the decision for him to move here, but for multiple reasons, it was the best choice. I guess the answer isn't always money, but it is nice to be financially stable. good luck, and if you find a solution, please share it with me =)

Hi everyone!! I don't need help with the immigration process (finally!) Husband is here, finally got the green card.. things are moving along, he is just missing home and I am trying to get him some of his favorite things from Oz, one of which is Victoria Bitter. is it possible to get any here in the US? I can't find it anywhere... TIA

Sorry everyone, just reading all the posts now from the last day..

I guess saying I'd never move to Australia in a million years is a bit of an exaggeration, but realistically.. for likely 10-15 years. There was a long list of reasons as to why he moved here vs me moving there, and that was all discussed on our first real trip together when we knew we wanted to pursue a relationship. Aside from financial reasons, my parents are significantly older than his, approaching mid 70's and my father has health problems. My parents won't and simply can't travel, especially a long trip to Australia. Even if they could travel, they wouldn't be able to afford it. His parents just hit 60, they both travel freely (they were both here for a month in April for the wedding celebration) and have the financial freedom to do so. So, I just really couldn't leave my parents at this stage in their lives. I work in healthcare, I am depended on to be there for medical appts etc and decision making. If his parent(s) were to get sick while mine were still alive, I honestly dont know what we would do. We'll cross that bridge if it comes, but for now.. this is where I need to be. We have even talked about moving due to him not being able to find a job in the area, plus my department closing. We wouldn't be moving out of a 2.5-3 hr drive radius, at most. Aside from my parents health, there were many other factors that went into our decision. Again, I own property here, he was actually living with his parents when I met him, so really had no financial ties. He had already lived in London and Spain in his early 20's, so had the experience of living away from his family. I have a dog, who, although wouldn't be impossible to get to Australia, would be a huge financial burden, plus the thought of having to leave her in quarantine for over a month just makes me sick to my stomach, especially after all the testing and vaccinations she'd have to get before we left. And, yes, in a million years, I would never think of leaving her behind. Let me correct that.. in a trillion bazillion years, I would never leave her behind. She IS my child, and if you had to put your 3 year old child into quarantine and only see them once or twice a week for an hour, you would re think your move to Oz as well. I get it, they don't have rabies there, but the process seems to be a bit of overkill after all the ####### they have to go through before they even get to quarantine. To be perfectly honest, if it wasn't for him saying very early on that he would hands down move here, the relationship would have never progressed. Whether you think its excuses or insecurity or what not, that's my reality. If he were to hand me an ultimatum tomorrow and say either we move to australia, or else.. I am not sure what I would do. I'd first and foremost be upset that he had 2 years of mental preparation of moving here and gave up after 6 months, but I also think there's a pretty good chance I'd pick 'or else.."

But anyway, none of that really matters because I never twisted his arm to come here, he knew my thoughts and situation when we made the decision, and for 2 years we've been happily planning for him to come here, and the issue is his adjustment NOW. Lynjer, you summarized exactly how he feels, what I hear come out of his mouth everyday. Its just funny because before he moved here, I always assumed, that all of America had Australians up on this pedestal.. great accents, smart, chasing crocodiles and snakes around in between surf breaks.. you know.. and that's the kind of reaction I had gotten from everyone too when I told them I was marrying an aussie "oh wow! that's sooo cool!" etc etc but in the time he's been here, he's had 2 jobs in restaurants, one only lasted a week or two before they told him it wasn't working out, and the other one is the one hes been in for a few months now, but he really has been experiencing some racism? I guess that's what you would call it.. he had years of bar-tending experience before he got his degree, yet at this place they only keep him as a table runner/barback because of the 'language barrier'. He feels as though he is treated like he is stupid there, especially when all of the other employees are the equivalent of the frumpy fuglies you've talked about, but he prefers to call them "drunken slutty potheads".. as they all smoke pot the whole shift, drink until 5am after the bar closes and then sleep with each other. He is totally fine with holding a position that is "beneath him" so to speak, we had many talks about that before he moved here, he knew about our economy. Its just the fact that when he accepts a "lesser" position, he's getting knocked down even from that and treated as though he is not good enough for that. Again, I think his lack of a professional job at the moment is partly his fault, he has sent out dozens of applications, but we literally have only gotten 1 email back stating they found a more qualified candidate. I am not sure if it is the economy, or if it was his, sorry babe.. crappy resume that he was originally sending out.

Again, my concern is not where to live, we have already decided that, but just that I feel like I've tried every avenue I know how to get him contacts for a job, get him out of the house meeting people..and I just don't know what to do anymore and I just needed to vent. Maybe this is a normal part of adjustment. I feel like the old saying "You can drag a horse to the water, but you can't make him drink" applies here.. I've given him phone numbers to call for contacts, emails, told him to get a recruiter, a professional to write his resume..sat down for hours helping him etc etc.. I'll pay for it! And just finally, after 6 months.. he's gotten a professional to write the resume,and started making phone calls to recruiters. I've told him so and so wants to get together.. why don't you guys go out for a beer, never calls.. so I've told so and so to just stop by and pick him up! And he ends up having a good time! He has access to my vehicle all day. He could even have it at night if he dropped me off/picked me up. I work 7pm to 7am, we spend a couple hours in the morning together, and then I sleep the rest of the day. and instead of taking advantage of that time and making phone calls etc, he goes back to bed with me. Or looks at cars we can't afford to buy yet. I've been very nice to him about this most of the time. I do occasionally lose my patience, (but not often, I know it is a sensitive subject and I know I need to bite my tongue!) only because I can see that him not having a job is causing this depression he is in, but how does he expect to get a job!?!? I have spent countless hours helping fix up the resume after I noticed the spelling errors, looking for jobs online, looking for recruiters, talking to people for possible leads, etc etc. I have been as supportive as I possibly can. The only thing I have left to do is purchase a male Australian voice over and start making the phone calls myself, on top of working 60 hours a week. Yes, moomin, I think you are right, he resents the situation, not me. We are happily in love aside from this adjustment issue, I just don't think he realizes he is insulting me every time he talks about how Americans are fat and lazy etc etc. Which I have to hear about every single day. I know full well there are things wrong with this country, but I am still proud to be an American and proud to live here. Maybe he just got off on the wrong foot in the country with the type of people he is working with at the restaurant, thinking all Americans want to make lots of money without actually working for it. But, his last night at that job is this weekend.. It was getting more toxic than helpful, and I think he kept thinking it was going to turn into a full time job, although after 4 months of one night a week, you'd think he'd realize it wasn't. Hopefully with this job done and no employment at all, he will be much more motivated with the resume/recruiter.

@ Chippys girl - Yes Tasmania is beautiful!! We got to explore a little there last September on my trip to Oz, I loved freycinet and Cradle Mtn! I hope my husband starts to feel like this is 'home' soon too. I'm tempted to take a trip back to Oz once we get his green card, if he still doesn't have a job just to increase his spirits some even though we dont have the money, but I'm worried that might backfire as well, and he wont want to come back. Prior to him coming here, he really wanted to live here as well.. he had traveled here to see me like 4 or 5 times before we got married, but I think he just thought it would continue to be like vacation, as we would always take trips to different spots when he came and vice versa, but we also both had well paying jobs, now living on just one salary. I think he also thought it would be much easier to find a job, although I do think its partly his fault for lack of motivation/not spell checking his resume. Again, I am so thankful for all he has given up to be here with me, in a million years I could never do what he just did, but sometimes I just want to shake the boy by the shoulders and tell him to wake up. He just gets too resistant and hypocritical at times.. like for instance, I'm sure you may have noticed we have a problem with illegal immigrants here, (same with immigrants in Australia) which, don't speak english.. he gets very frustrated by this, and so do I.. especially when you go through the process we have already gone through and are still going through, and wants to talk about how they need to adapt to a different society etc etc and then.. I know its silly, but this is just one example of many.. but he would come home from his bar/restaurant work and complain that a customer got upset with him because he asked if they wanted tomato sauce and didn't know what that was.. since we call it ketchup here, and he KNOWS its called ketchup here, but its like he refuses to call it ketchup and he thinks hes going to change all of america to say things the way he says it in australia, but thinks every other nationality needs to conform to american ways when they are here.

I don't see him doing any volunteer work. He doesnt even use the gym membership I have for him. He just quit the one job he had that was one night a week because he would have to work until 4am or so and that would screw up his whole week with sleep, so he wouldn't be able to do anything during the daytime as far as job searching. I wish he would, but again he's just so resistant. All of my friends and family love him, and since before he got here all I've been hearing is "let me know when you're working so I can take him out.. I want to get together with him bla bla bla" and he knows this, but wont call people back or call them period. Its like he thinks they're hanging out with him for sympathy, which is not the case. He gets along fine with all my friends husbands and likes them, but again.. just wont go that extra step to have more of a friendship with them. I keep putting myself in his shoes mentally,because I know he has just gone through a HUGE change, and although I've never lived out of the country, I did do travel nursing before, so I have moved to a completely new place where I knew NOBODY, not even a significant other, and I got out there and made friends. I just feel like he is in this downward spiral that I don't know how to get him out of. I know nothing will ever replace his friends at home, but he does nothing to make new friends. He wants a job, and depressed he doesn't have a job, but you don't get a job unless you have a good resume (without spelling errors!) and actually send it to company's that are hiring, or get a recruiter. But everyday that goes by, he puts in a 25% effort, maybe calls one recruiter and doesn't leave a message, FINALLY after 6 months got a professional to help write a proper resume. I've been asking around to everyone.. got contacts for him to call about potential jobs in logistics like what he did in Oz, but doesn't call. He spends all his spare time looking at cars he wants to buy, but we can't get a second car until he gets a job. I feel like I've tried every single route to get him to do this stuff.. hold his hand, dial the numbers.. write the emails for him, fill out the online applications for him, to the other extreme of like withholding fun things like going out for lunch or on a hike or something until he contacts whoever he needs to contact. He is a smart man with a good work ethic and had a great job in Oz, but he just wont put the effort in here. I just hope he gets over this hump soon!! I guess I wasn't done venting.. lol

So, my now husband moved here from Australia in Feb.. we got married within a couple of days, and are currently still waiting on a K-1 AOS. The 180 days should hopefully be coming to an end within the month..

He's been here 6 months and is just very frustrated with the US and I think he regrets moving here.. hasn't been able to find a job (has had his work authorization since May sometime..) He has a degree, but has only been able to find like barback/bartending shifts once or twice a week. He comments and criticizes nearly EVERYTHING and how much better it is in australia.. traffic laws, customer service, grocery stores.. you name it, he's got something to say about it. On top of it all, one of the big reasons he moved here (although I don't think I would ever move there) is because I had a stable job a mile from my house, which of course I'm upside down in my mortgage on, so I wouldn't have been able to sell without taking a HUGE hit anyway, plus I have a dog, and that would just be another huge expense/complication of getting there. Well.. in a few more months, the department I work in is closing, which means we're looking at a move sometime in the near future anyway, as I'll need to find a job in another hospital, likely not within a reasonable commute. I've been working a ton of overtime (while I still can!), paying off the wedding, and trying to save money, to which he repeatedly tells me "you wouldn't have to work at all if you moved to Australia". I really feel like he just resents me for us making the decision for having him move here. But we didn't have a crystal ball 2 years ago when we made this decision, and we've spent a LOT of money, as you all know.. in order to get him here. I just feel incredibly guilty now. I know and appreciate how much he has given up in order to come here to be with me, but I just wish he would embrace this experience instead of fight it so much. Our relationship otherwise is fine, when I am off from work we spend the time together and get along great.. I just think he gets depressed being home alone so much because I am at work. I just hope he can find a challenging job SOON, I think it will give him a purpose of being here and he'll be happy contributing, make his own friends and not feel like he gave up his world to sit on my couch.

Just needed to vent a little.. anyone else having any adjustment issues?

Thank you everyone,

Yeah, I think my husband did get the ds-3025, but he thinks he threw it out.. BOYS!!!! Ugh.. so, I will just be crossing my fingers that the POE forms get to meet up with the 485 paperwork, since he doesn't need any additional immunizations anyway. I just keep reading that the USCIS likes to lose these forms on their end, so it would be a good idea to send it in myself.. we will cross our fingers for now, and if we get an RFE, we will scramble to contact his doctor is Australia to get the proper documenation. It is just that is it a hassle for what may be nothing.

Thank you!!

Jenn

Hi everyone,

So.. here is the question..

my husband just moved here on a k-1 fiance visa from australia, and we got married right away. we are working on the adjustment of status paperwork now, and I am not really clear on this I-693 medical stuff... he had all his medical exams etc done in australia as part of the k-1 process, but never received this i-693 form from anyone, apparently it is off in USCIS land somewhere.

I have read it is not necessary to have this form if all the medical exam stuff is already done, which it is, but then i'm reading that if we don't include the form that we will get an RFE. I can certainly print a blank i-693 and fill in what we can with his name etc, but we dont need to go through the medical exam again, so should we just leave it out? Or maybe attach a note to it stating that this was already done in australia, but we never received a copy?

Anymore insight on this?

Thank you,

Jenn

OK, so, we still have the big wedding planned here in April, so, we are keeping it a secret from everyone.. but my fiance.. I mean, ahem.. husband.. moved here on the 16th, we met up in vegas for a few days and got married on the 18th!!! Sooo excited!!! I just want to stand on the rooftop and scream it, but I can't.. so I thought I'd at least tell a bunch of strangers =) We wanted to get a head start on the paperwork since it is 2 months until the wedding, and his parents will be here for a couple of weeks afterwards, so wanted to make sure we got it all done on time. It is soooo nice not having to see each other with a countdown in the back of our heads.. I hated constantly thinking.. "we only get to spend 8 more days together.. now 7.. now 6.." It is fantastic having that feeling GONE!!!

Now.. to start looking into all this other paperwork we have to start.. there will probably be more posts from me soon... sigh...

yes, once you are in the US, you can fly wherever you like also within the US.. you just cannot leave the country and come back, so no worries.. just dont get too drunk and head to Tijuana! haha!! Enjoy vegas =)

Yay for you both! Congrats!!

Hey everyone,

Just wondering.. my fiance is going to be sending in Packet 3 shortly after his medical (scheduled for Aug 22) and I'm flying to Australia Sept 7th to be with him for a couple of weeks, there's a chance that the interview may be scheduled for the time that I am there. Do they allow the fiance to come for the interview as well? or is it a single interview only?

Thanks,

Jenn

I dont imagine it would save any time, as the bulk of the time spent waiting is the paperwork just sitting on a shelf waiting for someone to get to it. I'm not sure even a lawyer could speed that up. Maybe they have some pull though. I do think it would be a waste of money in the sense that its a pretty simple process to go through on your own, providing you both speak english. It is a bit intimidating at first, but with some research and the help of some good friends and guides here at VJ, it's doable =) I looked into a lawyer before we started the process as well, thinking all the legal jargon would be too much for me, and now I'm so glad I didnt. But, I guess if I had the extra money lying around (but who does with all these fees that go along with the process!?!? And of course the money spent on traveling to see the fiance!) then I would have gotten a lawyer. Best of luck!

Jenn

yeah, good luck! I'm dealing with the same issue, but we've decided to elope and throw a party later on down the road.

But if this helps:

We sent everythign in Feb 1st, got the NOA 2 June 6th (4 month wait) and are thinking he should have the visa in hand sept, (working on packet 3 now) and hopefully move to the US in November (although they have up to 6 months to move to the US from the day you get the visa). Whcih means, we are getting married somewehre between november and Feb. So, thats 9 months to 1 year from the initial filing of the I129F.

What I would do is overshoot the year by a few months to give yourself time incase of complications, and worst case scenario, your fiance has to wait a few extra months to move here so that the cruise wedding falls within the 90 days. But.. then you're screwed in the freak case that the NOA2 gets approved super early (I have read of a few people on here actualy getting approved within 1 month) because everythign has expiration dates on it.. once you have your NOA2, you've got 4 months to get the rest of hte paperwork/interview done, and then 6 months from there for the fiance to move here.

THe other option, which a friend of mine did, her fiance (from the UK) came to the states in May on a visit, they got married.. and then he went back home after the honeymoon. They will bring him here on a k-3 visa instead of the k1. If you are heart set on having a big cruise wedding right away on a specific date adn dont want the stress of hoping allthe paperwork gets filed accordingly, that might be a better option for you.

Jenn

I'd actually like to know a little more as well.. but I think the vaccines are the major focus of it.. my fiance is just starting to go through this step now, his medical is scheduled for Aug 22nd. They had him go to his regular MD beforehand to get some blood work to find out what he is already immune to, and has to get other vaccines as well.. Hepatitis B etc. I THINK that other than that, its just like a regular physical.. and making sure you dont have any communicable diseases.

Jenn

Glad to hear, thank you! I emailed the consulate just to be on the safe side. Packet 3 will definitely be submitted way before expiration date, its just the interview I was worried about getting scheduled late. Good to know they are getting them done quickly =) I'll actually be in Oz sept 9-21.. wonder if the interview will actually fall in that time frame, would be cool! I would love to be there with him. I am just a little worry wort, that is all.. but better to worry about this now than Oct 4th.. ya know!

Thanks!!

Jenn

Jen not sure why you waited so long as you were approved back in June. he could have had his medical before or anytime since then. Not sure what state he is in but he will get the results within a few days. I hope he has had his police check done and fingerprinting? Once he has the medical and all his papers he can send them in straight away over night express. So his app is 22nd August he should have the results back 26th -30 send it all off immediately interviews are wait approx 4 weeks but lately consulate is working really quick as some here have got their interview within a week so that's September so should not be a problem and then the K1 is valid for 6 months.

Yeah, I got the letter in the mail that it was approved approx June 8th, adn he was scheduled to come here June 22nd, so I got everything I needed together for the I134 etc and had that all ready for him.. no point in mailing it since he was going to be here in the US anyway, but he's been back since July 14th and yes, got hte fingerprints done and his passport updated already, but he travels for work..he is away from Sydney most week days and never has any idea where they are going to be and what days until a day or two to a week in advance, so it's been tough getting all of that done. I'm not sure why he waited so long to call to make an appt for the medical, but he did.. can't change that now.. but that is the only thing pending before mailing in packet 3. but either way, it looks like its going to be cutting it close by the time they schedule the interview, because since it will be so close, we KNOW it will be scheduled for 5 weeks out.. haha! I think we should def get an extension. better than starting from square one all over again. Any idea on how to get the extension?? Thanks!! Jenn

Hi all,

So.. we got our NOA2 back in June, and it expires Oct 6 2011. In the meantime my fiance has been working on everything.. getting a new passport, fingerprints etc etc. He just called to schedule the medical which he needs before we can mail in packet 3, and the earliest he can get in is August 22nd. I'm worried that by the time he gets the medical done, then finally sends in packet 3 and then the consulate schedules the interview, it will be close to or past the expiration date. I think we can get an extension on this date? I've searched around this website but I can't find out how. Is anyone able to help me? I dont want to wait until Oct 1st to start worrying about this. Thanks!! Jenn

yes, I have it now.. thank you!!! It is very easy to miss.. I clicked that link and it just looked like 7 more pages of instructions, but yes it is one of the last 2 pages with the checklist. Thanks!!

Got the hard copy letter from NVC today too =) Things are moving along!!

Fiance is due to visit tomorrow as well, flights are delayed due to the ash cloud.. pain in the #######!!! Can't wait to see him though.. been 5 loooooong months.. now I have to wait at least another 6 hours!! He'll be here when the packet arrives to his house in Oz though.. oh well, have mostly everything we need here anyway, should be able to send him back with almost everything assembled. Yay!!!

Jenn

Hi All,

I just received the email instructions from the US Consulate in Sydney. Listed in the instructions is..

Forms Required: Form DSL-1076 - applicant's statement of readiness to be interviewed

When I click on the little blue link for this, its not a form, just another 5 page list of instructions. Is there an actual form for this? I can't find it anywhere!! On VJ, I googled it.. nothing. Or, should he just write a letter and title it DSL-1076 and state he is ready to be interviewed?? lol.. what do we do here??

Thanks! Jenn

mine came earlier as well.. VJ had said about 5 months, I got it at 4 months. =)

Thanks everyone! I feel much better after reading these responses, I was worried there would be a slight chance he would get turned around after arriving here!! And 3 weeks is not long enough as it is.. I cannot wait until this Ozzie is here permanantly! I will definitely be sending him off with some photocopies and letters, but unfortunately he wont be able to get a note from his boss.. he's afraid his boss might fire him if he finds out he's planning on leaving within a few months or so anyway.. and we certainly can't afford to let that happen!

Congrats! Just got mine yesterday as well! =)

Oh, good to know! I can't imagine why they would think we would pay money to start a legal process, just to screw it all up by staying illegaly on a tourist visa.. but who knows. I guess crazier things have happened. His boss doesn't know the full plan at this point, he doesn't want him to know that he's planning on leaving to move here because he is afraid he will lose his job, but we will figure something out. He will def have a return ticket with him, and I think I'm goign to type a letter and photo copy the wedding invitation for him to print out and have on him that this is definitely only a visit! Thanks for sharing! Jenn

Hey everyone!

So.. exciting news today, after 4 months of waiting.. I finally received the email confirmation that the NOA2 is approved and the hard copy is on its way. Yay!!!

My fiance is due to visit June 22nd- July 12th, I've heard sometimes its difficult for them to visit though? Even if its just on a tourist visa like he's been here on twice before? Has anyone else had a problem with their fiance coming to visit the US? He's already got a return ticket scheduled and has to get back to work and he is coming here to attend a good friends wedding with me July 9th. Is there anything he should bring/do before he leaves on his flight to get here?

Any info on this would be very helpful.. I would be devestated if he got turned back around after flying here!!

Thanks, Jenn