Guess I am not the first one in such situation so hopefully, I will get help here. I am really frustrated.
I applied for my first Greencard recently, 9 months since we got married (I came on K-1 visa). My parents had to borrow all the money for filing documents in Ukraine and send them to me, because my husband only promised that he will give me the money, but never did. And in Ukraine, you can basically live on those money for a year. Now I can't even go back because they have to pay their debt and I need to work here to be able to earn that money. My salary in the capital was $300\mo with nothing left to spend after you pay utilities and buy food. My parents don't want me to come back too (they say there is no future there).
Our relationship wasn't so great even when I was applying, but I thought once I have a job and more independent and have money on myself to look better, the way I looked when I came - I thought maybe things would change.
Before we got married and after the wedding, for couple months our relationship was okay, not perfect, but pretty average, we had some good moments. Before I even came, my (future) husband seemed like the nicest guy, he'd say he wanted a family, how we would spend time together, when he came to visit me in Kiev he literally begged me to come to the US and said he will take good care of me and will support me. I only went there because I knew I wasn't getting younger (I am 28) and I wanted kids too at some point and wanted them to grow up in a stable country, and I liked his personality too, I thought he would be a great husband and Dad for our kids.
But now he is like another person. He says he is a "deranged sociopath" (I even have his texts saying that) and always been that way (only thing - he forgot to tell that before we got married). The only person in the world he needs is his son (I didn't even know he had a son before he came to visit me, 4 months since we met each other. I was in love by then and decided to roll with it). Now as I am not a new shiny toy anymore, he just wants to get rid of me in all ways possible. He humiliates me all the time, threatens and manipulates. Says he will pull up sponsorship every time I say or do something he doesn't like, threatens to kick me out from the house, makes me feel bad about everything - the way I look, the way I talk, mocks my accent, says my life is a joke, calls me fat all the time. I have found some Ukrainian girls in our area and they ask me out to see a movie or to park sometimes and he always says that I will go to bars to hang out with guys, even though I never gave him reasons to think so. He forbids me to have male friends, even though I always had a better friendship with guys. Tells me what time I should be home, tells me he can't stand me, tries to make me live at friends' house. He also frequently made me work his shifts in a hotel instead of him (and I don't even have a work permit). Couple times I had to help when they had a 911 situation but he quickly understood that he can manipulate me like that, so I had to work instead of him even when I was sick or he would say that I am lazy and never do anything. Once I refused because something happened to my back and I was in pain and could barely move, and he said that I could get the eff out of his house and that he will change all his credit cards. He says that he lets me "live and eat for free in his house" so I have to do something. I do clean in our house though, do all the laundry and whatever I can, like mow the lawn, so it's not like I'm just sitting all day doing nothing. He will also reproach me with what he has to spend on me (like food, or contacts or minor stuff). He never touched me since we got married but he watches violent porn all the time (rape, blackmailing..). Not sure if I can write about it here... Considering all that, my self-esteem is non-existent now. I'd probably do something to myself if I didn't have my parents because that would kill them. I feel like I'm broken.
I don't know how serious is that, but he is also being violent with our cat, when I am in my room I can hear her screaming (can I say that about a cat?) like he is murdering her, but every time I run downstairs to check on her he always lets her go and he says they were just playing and that she (and I) is "drama queen". But her hair will be everywhere on the floor. He once put her in the dryer and turned it on and then sent me a text about it like that's something very funny. To be honest, I am afraid that one day cat won't be enough.
One day I tried to talk about our relationship, and he pushed me on the floor so I fell and hurt my foot. Once I called him out on that but he said that no one will believe me and that he has "his own" version of what has happened, and that basically, it was me who hit him.
Couple times when we had fights he had this crazy look that I was afraid he would kill me. But he probably knows I have a right to call the police if he hits me so he never did.
Also, now because of problems with him mom\drugs\bad grades his son will be living with us, so now my husband is very serious about kicking me out. I live in constant fear that he will either do that or cancel his affidavit of support or who knows what else he can do.
I am not sure where to go with this. I don't have much evidence. I have emails and texts where he insults me or says he will kick me out. basically, I have texts about everything I told here, but I'm not sure that's enough and that if I tell all of this somewhere, anyone will believe me. I'm afraid that if it gets ugly, I can't even afford a lawyer and he can, and I'll end up being "the bad guy". So I'm not sure what I can do.