share inspiring stories

[Messybrownhair 251]

Im not sure if this is the right forum for my post but I was hoping people could share their experiences when they went through tough times and how they overcame it. It can be pre or post immigration stories, personal issues etc. I know that myself (and maybe others here too) can benefit from hearing people's successful triumphs!

[Removed-02242014 19]

You are one of those unique people whose timeline and experiences all seem to fall into place. Because I live in a community filled with Fil-Am relationships, I have the opportunity to witness many successful relationships as well as the ones where the wife is merely a slave to the American husband. Some of these guys have no right marrying anyone ... especially a foreign-born woman. I must agree with one post I read that I despise when a husband refers to his wife as "my filipina." It is degrading to me.

I have a greater respect for the actual visa process and I just watched a show about immigration that said there are over 4 million people waiting to be processed one way or another into the United States. Therefore, when I have to wait longer than others, I still feel blessed. Thank you for this thread.

You are one of those unique people whose timeline and experiences all seem to fall into place. Because I live in a community filled with Fil-Am relationships, I have the opportunity to witness many successful relationships as well as the ones where the wife is merely a slave to the American husband. Some of these guys have no right marrying anyone ... especially a foreign-born woman. I must agree with one post I read that I despise when a husband refers to his wife as "my filipina." It is degrading to me.

I have a greater respect for the actual visa process and I just watched a show about immigration that said there are over 4 million people waiting to be processed one way or another into the United States. Therefore, when I have to wait longer than others, I still feel blessed. Thank you for this thread.

[Messybrownhair 251]

Immigration wise, hubby and I were lucky because the process was kind to us. We also had ample time to get to know each other so we did not have any doubts when we filed. But life isnt a breeze for us, I went through a lot of homesickness and now I am struggling with his deployment. So like any other couple, we have our ups and downs. But I am hopeful.. I know this baby is a blessing. Feb cant come soon enough. I hope people here can share their experiences

Edited September 9, 2012 by Messybrownhair

[Tintin and Mike 127]

Fiance's convincing me to let him join USN and I'm like, I don't think I'll survive another time away from him. I know it's for our future but I get sad every time we start that conversation. Hang in there, he might be away from you and your soon to be adorable child but he's doing good for the country

[luvnlife07 1]

Im not sure if this is the right forum for my post but I was hoping people could share their experiences when they went through tough times and how they overcame it. It can be pre or post immigration stories, personal issues etc. I know that myself (and maybe others here too) can benefit from hearing people's successful triumphs!

I would like to share my life/love story. I met my hubby online in 2003 and we started talking online since then . We talked for 3 long years until the day he came to the Philippines in March 2006 to meet me.

We got married in 2007, had our first child in 2008.

There were ups and down in our relationsip especially in finances. We were in the middle of petitioning my 2 kids in the Philippines in 2009 when he lost his job. But God made a way. Despite of the financial difficulties,,we never fight about money matters.

God is great my kids are here now with us (2010). He is still unemployed but our Love for each other and Faith In God made our relationship stronger.

We are still very much in love with each other and is now married for 5 years.

Me and my 2 kids just had our N-400 and am waiting for the oath taking ceremony.

With God There is Nothing Impossible! Love Always finds a way.I am blessed. If u all remember my name here before was happywifeymom, happyblessedme and now it became luvnlife07.

Good Luck to all who are still starting on their journey. I Believe TRUE LOVE waits and it moves in a mysterious ways.

[Removed-02242014 19]

Fiance's convincing me to let him join USN and I'm like, I don't think I'll survive another time away from him. I know it's for our future but I get sad every time we start that conversation. Hang in there, he might be away from you and your soon to be adorable child but he's doing good for the country

The rewards for your future outweigh him being away for the little time that you will be apart ... If your love is strong you haven't a thing to worry about.

[Removed-02242014 19]

That is why scripture says "Faith can Move Mountains" .... I feel yours was a bond to begin with. Petitioning you children had to be difficult to get through.. OMG! My fiancee wanted to leave her daughter with her father for a year but all other Pinay here tell me "don't let her do it!"

[Tintin and Mike 127]

The rewards for your future outweigh him being away for the little time that you will be apart ... If your love is strong you haven't a thing to worry about.

Yeah made us stronger through time but we've been away from each other for 2.5 years already. It's been 11 months since the last time we hold each other and it's not funny anymore

Thanks for your encouraging words

[adiiann 163]

I am not sure if my story is inspiring enough to post as motivation.

Like most couple here, our visa process was somewhat tedious as you have to wait every single step and hoping that there’s not much problems along the way.

Then, after all the time, money and efforts to get here and be with the person you think you want to spend the rest of your life, you have to face a lot of changes personally and professionally, adjust with the social norm and learn the way of living of your new environment. It’s a lot of effort to be able to live normally like the way you live before you get here.

Many people think that once you get here, life would be all blissful, probably for others but not for me. Though, I and my husband are not considered as young couple but we’re both young enough to be able to live comfortably, financially wise. It took us almost three years of struggle to somewhat confidently plan the future of our family. But throughout the years of living together, a lot of ups and downs, a lot of financial struggles and a lot of adjustments and learning from each other, we always both concluded that we never regret that we decided to spend the rest of our lives together.

If the relationship is real, if the intentions are real, if the feelings are real and if the whole thing between you and your partner is real, whatever mushrooms of uncertainties come up in your life, you should be able to overcome it as you don’t expect anything but accept and work it out together.

[slangofoil 50]

Well, we have been together for 7 years now, and a lot of it was long-distance, but the hard part came over a year after he had moved over here. I got very frustrated with him after a year of him taking and failing exams that he needed in order to work in the profession he wanted, and that he studied for in college. I couldn't handle wasted money and watching him waste time and not study, and then fail. I was also SO SO miserable at work, and in the middle of planning our big wedding (married at the courthouse originally) that I was just really stressed out in general. I also felt that he was not spending enough time with me, as he was going out with friends two of the three nights he had off from work. He's working as a bartender, and it is crappy because we're on opposite schedules so we weren't seeing each other much to begin with, and for him to go out with his friends instead of spending time with me was really hurting me. Plus I felt like he kept putting my goals of a house and kids off, because he wanted to be in that profession before we did those things. It was a rough several months where I was just angry, stressed, depressed and worried all the time.

Things are a lot better now though. I got on a different team at work, the wedding is over, he's not really talking about getting into the profession he was originally considering and is now hoping to eventually open a bar. He's not playing racquetball anymore due to his friend that had the court moving, he's spending a lot more time with me, and we are planning to buy a house in early spring and start trying for a baby after that. I made a huge effort after the wedding to change my own attitude and be more positive, and make it worth his time to stay home with me by cooking nice dinners (something I NEVER did). It was a combination of so many things that made our situation better, but it has really encouraged me that if I am more calm and accepting of how our life IS, instead of how I WISH it was, and if I work on my own attitude, that things will be ok. I know I can bring a lot of negativity into the home sometimes, and me being more positive has affected him very positively too. We're in a really good place right now with a lot to be thankful for, and a lot to look forward to.

So situation is not as bad as having your DH deploying for a year, but hopefully you can stay positive, as I think that will have a big impact. Believe me, when I was in the throes of that period, I would read advice about changing your own attitude, and working on yourself rather than trying to change others, and it was so frustrating because I felt like others were letting me down, so why should I be acting like little miss sunshine? But it has helped me a lot in the end. I just had to muddle through for a while, and kind of, "fake it til you make it." My sister gave me that advice, and though it's cliche, it's a good one. Oh, also, doing things to improve myself, like going to the gym regularly, and getting back into the crafts I enjoy helped me as well.

[Messybrownhair 251]

Well, we have been together for 7 years now, and a lot of it was long-distance, but the hard part came over a year after he had moved over here. I got very frustrated with him after a year of him taking and failing exams that he needed in order to work in the profession he wanted, and that he studied for in college. I couldn't handle wasted money and watching him waste time and not study, and then fail. I was also SO SO miserable at work, and in the middle of planning our big wedding (married at the courthouse originally) that I was just really stressed out in general. I also felt that he was not spending enough time with me, as he was going out with friends two of the three nights he had off from work. He's working as a bartender, and it is crappy because we're on opposite schedules so we weren't seeing each other much to begin with, and for him to go out with his friends instead of spending time with me was really hurting me. Plus I felt like he kept putting my goals of a house and kids off, because he wanted to be in that profession before we did those things. It was a rough several months where I was just angry, stressed, depressed and worried all the time.

Things are a lot better now though. I got on a different team at work, the wedding is over, he's not really talking about getting into the profession he was originally considering and is now hoping to eventually open a bar. He's not playing racquetball anymore due to his friend that had the court moving, he's spending a lot more time with me, and we are planning to buy a house in early spring and start trying for a baby after that. I made a huge effort after the wedding to change my own attitude and be more positive, and make it worth his time to stay home with me by cooking nice dinners (something I NEVER did). It was a combination of so many things that made our situation better, but it has really encouraged me that if I am more calm and accepting of how our life IS, instead of how I WISH it was, and if I work on my own attitude, that things will be ok. I know I can bring a lot of negativity into the home sometimes, and me being more positive has affected him very positively too. We're in a really good place right now with a lot to be thankful for, and a lot to look forward to.

So situation is not as bad as having your DH deploying for a year, but hopefully you can stay positive, as I think that will have a big impact. Believe me, when I was in the throes of that period, I would read advice about changing your own attitude, and working on yourself rather than trying to change others, and it was so frustrating because I felt like others were letting me down, so why should I be acting like little miss sunshine? But it has helped me a lot in the end. I just had to muddle through for a while, and kind of, "fake it til you make it." My sister gave me that advice, and though it's cliche, it's a good one. Oh, also, doing things to improve myself, like going to the gym regularly, and getting back into the crafts I enjoy helped me as well.

That is an amazing story! I am glad you guys have made it this far. I wish you luck as you try for a baby, I am 19 weeks now and so grateful for this blessing. I am trying very hard to stay positive! My husband has been gone for a week now, but I am hanging in there! God bless you both!