Not sure which is best?

[Sameh'sHabibi 3]

Hello to everyone! I am new to this forum, and so glad to find it! I have a question for those of you with more information and experience than myself. I am an Arkansas born and bred American girl, and my fiance lives in Cairo, Egypt. I want to bring him to the US, but am unsure which option is faster and easier of the two: bring him here on a K1 Fiance Visa or marry him while on my visit to see him in July and apply for him as a spouse. I have two main concerns in which of these to pick. 1. We have not known each other for a very long time (months, not years) and this will be our first face-to-face trip together, so I don't want to give them an excuse to say our marriage is a "sham". 2. I am a LPN and have been for 7 years, with a good steady income, but this year (since 3/11 and until 12/10/11) I have gone from full-time to "as needed" (PRN or pool in hospital-speak) employment because I am finishing my RN degree. I can show sufficient income on last year's taxes, as well as sufficient deposits and cash-flow in my bank account, but will not have a steady income by paycheck stubs until after I graduate December 10th of this year. I am concerned about qualifying on the Affidavit of Support, which I understand is higher for a spouse. However, I really would like to marry while we are in Egypt so his family can be there as I have been married before and he has not, so his family really wants to be there. What is my best option here? Thanks for any input!!

[tru_loves_journey 117]

Hello to everyone! I am new to this forum, and so glad to find it! I have a question for those of you with more information and experience than myself. I am an Arkansas born and bred American girl, and my fiance lives in Cairo, Egypt. I want to bring him to the US, but am unsure which option is faster and easier of the two: bring him here on a K1 Fiance Visa or marry him while on my visit to see him in July and apply for him as a spouse. I have two main concerns in which of these to pick. 1. We have not known each other for a very long time (months, not years) and this will be our first face-to-face trip together, so I don't want to give them an excuse to say our marriage is a "sham". 2. I am a LPN and have been for 7 years, with a good steady income, but this year (since 3/11 and until 12/10/11) I have gone from full-time to "as needed" (PRN or pool in hospital-speak) employment because I am finishing my RN degree. I can show sufficient income on last year's taxes, as well as sufficient deposits and cash-flow in my bank account, but will not have a steady income by paycheck stubs until after I graduate December 10th of this year. I am concerned about qualifying on the Affidavit of Support, which I understand is higher for a spouse. However, I really would like to marry while we are in Egypt so his family can be there as I have been married before and he has not, so his family really wants to be there. What is my best option here? Thanks for any input!!

Hi, Welcome to VJ!

I feel like if I had it to do over I should have married my fiance while I was in Egypt..BUT We went the K1 route and our Interview is soon. Also if your older than your fiance I would say for you to marry him there cuz that seems to be a major problem with consulars at the embassy. This process takes months and is very stressful and all here will agree to that.

The best of luck to you

[CESep 4]

1. We have not known each other for a very long time (months, not years) and this will be our first face-to-face trip together, so I don't want to give them an excuse to say our marriage is a "sham".

Here's my personal opinion (I am a 29 yr old born and raised in Maryland).. Not trying to tell you what to do, just some things to think about.

If you haven't met face-to-fact yet, I would not plan a wedding yet (unless there is some cultural/religious reason you haven't met). I think there is so much more you learn about a person by being in their physical presence as opposed to phone/video conversations. I did online dating for a while, and every time I was amazed at the perception in my head vs. reality. Not that this is always bad, or that you won't still want to marry him, but I think it is worth waiting to see if that chemistry (including emotional, mental) is still there. Perhaps meet him in person, then revisit the decision of K-1 vs CR-1?

2. I am a LPN and have been for 7 years, with a good steady income, but this year (since 3/11 and until 12/10/11) I have gone from full-time to "as needed" (PRN or pool in hospital-speak) employment because I am finishing my RN degree. I can show sufficient income on last year's taxes, as well as sufficient deposits and cash-flow in my bank account, but will not have a steady income by paycheck stubs until after I graduate December 10th of this year. I am concerned about qualifying on the Affidavit of Support, which I understand is higher for a spouse.

Have you done the exact calculations on this? Your assets minus your debts divided by 5 can be used to supplement the income. For the K-1 app, it is 100% of the poverty level (google the 2011 values for this), for the AOS step, it is 125%. Do you have any family who would be willing to joint sponsor?

However, I really would like to marry while we are in Egypt so his family can be there as I have been married before and he has not, so his family really wants to be there. What is my best option here? Thanks for any input!!

I know this is a big deal. What about doing a non-legally binding ceremony and reception before he moves to the States? Would the family appreciate this, or think it is pointless?

Hope this helps. I don't expect you to substitute my opinions for your own, just want to help you with your thought process.

[tru_loves_journey 117]

Hi, Here's a link with the info you need

http://www.apexvisa.us/affidavits.html

Poverty Guidlines: Military 100% or 125% for all others

http://www.apexvisa.us/poverty.html

The co sponsor should add your fiance as a member of the household along with their dependents to get the number in the co sponsor household

[Sameh'sHabibi 3]

Hi, Welcome to VJ!

I feel like if I had it to do over I should have married my fiance while I was in Egypt..BUT We went the K1 route and our Interview is soon. Also if your older than your fiance I would say for you to marry him there cuz that seems to be a major problem with consulars at the embassy. This process takes months and is very stressful and all here will agree to that.

The best of luck to you

Thank you so much for your input! I am older than him by 2 years, so I don't think it is "older" enough to matter much. I just want to do whichever will be easiest to get him here with me where he belongs while keeping his mom happy by not doing anything that would be considered "haram". I am trying very hard to be patient, but I know things have been in upheaval over there this year, so I am frustrated by the lengthy delays. It is not practical for me to drop everything and move to Cairo until after December 10th (graduation!!! Yay!!) so I am stuck here while my heart beats in Cairo! And I am not sure if an American nurse would have any luck getting a job in Cairo, anyways. Maybe I will just be learning patience the hard way, but my sweet, stubborn Egyptian man is worth the wait. Good luck to you and yours!!!

[tru_loves_journey 117]

Thank you so much for your input! I am older than him by 2 years, so I don't think it is "older" enough to matter much. I just want to do whichever will be easiest to get him here with me where he belongs while keeping his mom happy by not doing anything that would be considered "haram". I am trying very hard to be patient, but I know things have been in upheaval over there this year, so I am frustrated by the lengthy delays. It is not practical for me to drop everything and move to Cairo until after December 10th (graduation!!! Yay!!) so I am stuck here while my heart beats in Cairo! And I am not sure if an American nurse would have any luck getting a job in Cairo, anyways. Maybe I will just be learning patience the hard way, but my sweet, stubborn Egyptian man is worth the wait. Good luck to you and yours!!!

Hi, You should be fine then just make sure when preparing your package for the USCIS that you follow the Guides. Your service center Will be The Vermont Service Center. Read, Read, Read lol And everything with your paperwork should go smoothly.

http://www.visajourn.../content/guides

I have been with my fiance for alittle over 3 years and if you read my timeline you will see the journey as been a long one.

Hopefully his interview will go great and he can be with me soon.

Also It takes 5 - 6 months to get approved at USCIS, it's after this you can look for the co sponsor IF you need one.

Edited May 28, 2011 by tru_loves_journey

[Sameh'sHabibi 3]

Here's my personal opinion (I am a 29 yr old born and raised in Maryland).. Not trying to tell you what to do, just some things to think about.

If you haven't met face-to-fact yet, I would not plan a wedding yet (unless there is some cultural/religious reason you haven't met). I think there is so much more you learn about a person by being in their physical presence as opposed to phone/video conversations. I did online dating for a while, and every time I was amazed at the perception in my head vs. reality. Not that this is always bad, or that you won't still want to marry him, but I think it is worth waiting to see if that chemistry (including emotional, mental) is still there. Perhaps meet him in person, then revisit the decision of K-1 vs CR-1?

He is trying to get a visitor visa before we file anything so we can do just that, but trying to get those for a single Middle Eastern man under 35 is like panning for gold. Maybe we will get lucky and it will be approved ..... We will find out in about 3 1/2 weeks. He really wants to come and ask my dad for permission to marry me first, so I think his effort is sweet. I don't mind going to Egypt to see him, but it is not really practical unless we want to marry when I get there. It is VERY frowned upon for unmarried women to stay with the fiancee and his family! His mom is worried about what kind of family the neighbors/friends/other family members will think they are if this is allowed. It would be sooooo much easier if he can visit here first! (Even then, for religious reasons, he will stay with my parents or other married family members. We will not be alone together until after we are married.)

Have you done the exact calculations on this? Your assets minus your debts divided by 5 can be used to supplement the income. For the K-1 app, it is 100% of the poverty level (google the 2011 values for this), for the AOS step, it is 125%. Do you have any family who would be willing to joint sponsor?

As long as the interview is after December 10, which it will be, I will be working full time again and can submit current check stubs for the interview showing a very good income.

I know this is a big deal. What about doing a non-legally binding ceremony and reception before he moves to the States? Would the family appreciate this, or think it is pointless?

Unless it is a full Islamic marriage with nikah, his family will know it is just for show and doesn't count. He himself is adamant that we have this so nothing is "haram", forbidden. He wants to do everything right so that God blesses our marriage.

Hope this helps. I don't expect you to substitute my opinions for your own, just want to help you with your thought process.

Thanks so much for the advice! It is always helpful to have a different perspective.

[Amber & Ahmed 133]

Hi, first.... welcome to VJ!

Second, here is my advice. If you want to marry when you come here why not? I did. Ahmed and I got married my first time here. We spent 2 weeks together before deciding to get married. I know that doesnt seem like a lot of time, but we already knew we wanted to get married, but first we wanted to see what it was like to be together. It was MARVELOUS. We had a very traditional relationship those 2 weeks... no hanky panky... just getting to know each other!

I too was a student so my visits here always revolved around school too. I am also 2 years older than Ahmed. Granted we havent had our interview yet, but really we do not foresee it as a problem. Really from reading your post thus far, we have many similar things going on.

We are currently awaiting an interview date, we have been stuck at the NVC since January 31st due to the embassy closing during the revolution. It is a long hard journey. Be prepared best you can for every step.

Use the time apart to gather all required documents and proofs. Also i believe the more time spent together helps the case all the more as well as gives you bonding time together. I have found this site to be an amazing help along the way. I even hope I have helped others on their way. Read read read all you can as Donna said in her response to you. VJ is an excellent source for guides step by step from others that have gone before you.

For us the time apart has been hard. We filed in June of 2010 and still have no interview date, so I moved here to Cairo to wait out the rest of this process with my love. Stay strong, you will get there. If you need anything at any time please feel free to let me know. I am here for you as well as I know the rest of the members are here for you too. I HAVE FOUND SOME AWESOME FRIENDS HERE, AND I KNOW YOU WILL TOO!!! Oh one more thing ... Congratulations on all the hard work you are doing with school and work, I always do admire women that work to meet their goals!

Amber

Edited May 28, 2011 by Amber & Ahmed

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

Im 2yrs older than Adam. I had known him 9 months before I went to Alexandria, stayed there 12 days with his grandparents/mom/sister/him and got married on day 8. That was almost 5yrs ago. My grandparents were on vacation and met him for me before I went over there.

After we married, we then filed for the spouse visa which at the time was the k3. Our situation is different, as is most and what works for one may not work for all. I think now days, regardless of which route you decide, its going to be a long one. Just be prepared to wait it all out!