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Saddle Bronc

Three assorted humour attempts

By Saddle Bronc in Off Topic

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Saddle Bronc Grand Master

Saddle Bronc   124

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Timeline
Posted
  1. Three mice were sitting at a bar, comparing how much danger they placed themselves in. One built like Ah-nold said "mousetraps, hah--I work out with the bar, and I can now move them easily with one forepaw". The second, builit like Michael Biehn grabbed a breakfast-plate-sized (on mouse-scale) pill and swallowed it stating "D-con rat poison; I use these as breath-mints". The third, built like Don Knotts, got up from the table and stated "that cat is back again for another lesson!"
  2. A blonde went to Meijer and loaded her cart with her weekly groceries, some cleaners and a pair of trainers. When she went to the register, the cashier asked her "paper or plastic" to which she replied "rubber". When the cashier looked at her incredulously, the blonde (revealingly) added "I'm paying by cheque".
  3. Note--quite dated
    A Pan-Am DC-10 was flying from JFK to Heathrow. When it had passed St. Johns (Newfoundland), the passengers heard the captain's voice saying "ladies and gentlemen, our port-engine conked; our arrival at Heathrow will be delayed 1 1/2 hours". Halfway between St. John's and Keflavik, the captain's voice came again "ladies and gentlemen, our starboard engine conked--our arrival will be delayed 4 1/2 hours". Finally, halfway between Iceland and Ireland, the captain's voice came a third time "ladies and gentlemen, our tail engine conked so we will be doing a water-landing; those who can swim, use the slides--and for those who can't, thank you for flying Pan-Am!"

2005/07/10 I-129F filed for Pras

2005/11/07 I-129F approved, forwarded to NVC--to Chennai Consulate 2005/11/14

2005/12/02 Packet-3 received from Chennai

2005/12/21 Visa Interview Date

2006/04/04 Pras' entry into US at DTW

2006/04/15 Church Wedding at Novi (Detroit suburb), MI

2006/05/01 AOS Packet (I-485/I-131/I-765) filed at Chicago

2006/08/23 AP and EAD approved. Two down, 1.5 to go

2006/10/13 Pras' I-485 interview--APPROVED!

2006/10/27 Pras' conditional GC arrives -- .5 to go (2 yrs to Conditions Removal)

2008/07/21 I-751 (conditions removal) filed

2008/08/22 I-751 biometrics completed

2009/06/18 I-751 approved

2009/07/03 10-year GC received; last 0.5 done!

2009/07/23 Pras files N-400

2009/11/16 My 46TH birthday, Pras N-400 approved

2010/03/18 Pras' swear-in

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As long as the LORD's beside me, I don't care if this road ever ends.

Nagishkaw Grand Master

Nagishkaw   510

Posted
Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Egypt
 Timeline
Posted

I liked the second one. :thumbs:

Don't just open your mouth and prove yourself a fool....put it in writing.

It gets harder the more you know. Because the more you find out, the uglier everything seems.

kodasmall3.jpg

 

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