Learning my fiancee 's culture

[DaRoq 36]

Hello all, I enjoy reading some of your comments and experiences with Filipino culture and English culture interactions. There will, no doubt, be a lot for me to learn as well since my 'to be' wife is a filipina. I am curious, does your filipina trim your nails and cut the food on your plate? I found this to be unusual as I have never experienced it before. I think it is sweet.

I also notice the language usage difference as well. The pronunciation of the vowels throws me off too. - Dave

I'm the exact opposite. I feel awkward when they pamper you so much. But that's just me. This past weekend I wouldn't even let this 24 y/o, UCLA-educated, network news-working, Tia Carrere-looking, Filipino-American (American of Filipino descent) bebot serve me up a dish of Filipino fruit salad to try and "break the ice" at a get-together. We still ended up talking the whole time, but that's how much I prefer not to be pampered.

I also feel silly being "commanded" to do things all day long. "You eat na"; "You sleep na"; "Maligo ka na"; "Rest". I know they're just trying to be sweet, but I'm a grown man...I don't need someone cutting my food or wiping my forehead.

[David and Jean 0]

Hi DaRoq, I am sure it will be different for me in the beginning and may change as we spend more time together. I am def. not used to the attention, I have taken care of myself for so many years. I will just try to remind myself that it is her way of caring. Nothing wrong with being a little spoiled maybe.

[rlogan 2,036]

Can't take a joke?

What I can take is all the childishness you care to dish out. You left out "nya nya nya", but all the same level of maturity is there without it.

I realize how vitally important it is in your world to self-declare these huge put-down victories.

But most of the rest of us are engaged in adult conversation. That includes humor, but at a level rising above an elementary school playground.

So yeah, I can take it. But as a little helpful advice - it isn't me who has to worry much about this kind of post.

[tallcoolone 102]

Have you actually tried that? What's worse - putting up with someone yelling, "Hey Joe!" at you on the street, or spending a few years in a Filipino prison for assaulting a Filipino?

Never had to. Only issue I had was a cab driver trying to overcharge me in Cebu, other than that my trips have been pure fun.

As I stated I like it and enjoy it when the say "Hey Joe".

Do you know what Hey Joe means?

[tallcoolone 102]

You're all talk. Why don't you try to do that the next time you go to the Philippines and then come back here (if you are alive) and tell us all about it.

And careful who you punch there, especially in Davao. If you hit one of the mayor's relatives or friends, then you're marked, especially if you are an arrogant, cocky white man. You know macho Filipino guys, they like to brag when they put an "ugly American" in his place. They put your face in the papers with the widest circulation for the whole Phiippines to see.

I doubt any of the Mayors relative or friend would be trying to rob me and or kidnap me in the first place.

If I did have to turn to force in PI, I would want it to be in Davao (Which I think would be the last place it would happen).

I am "Golden" in Davao. When I go to Davao Airport, I am allowed to have my friends and family with me, and they are allowed to enter the airport with me and stay with me until my flight leaves. I get extra special treatment in Davao. Cuz it's all about who you know and whom you are with.

[tallcoolone 102]

If you're white, and you are in Mindanao, you'd better keep a low profile.

That's a stupid statement.

I would say Mindanao is one of the safest place if your white, of course there is a couple of area American should never go, but other than that it's one of the best and safest places for "White" people to go.

Go to Manilla (which is a disgrace of a city) and Cebu, Americans are targets for pickpockets, robbery, overcharging cabs, etc.

Go to Davao, Americans are protected and taken care of their, I never have issues in Davao with overcharging taxis, etc, or anything in Davao. The Mayor runs that city with an Iron Claw.

The great thing about what you posted is that it keeps American aways from Mindanao, and when I go to small towns and provinces in the region then I am like a Rock Star walking the street.

Go to other forums and read about Americans living in PI, they always remark how safe Davao is.

Edited September 15, 2010 by tallcoolone

[Tahoma 2,291]

Can't take a joke?

Why aren't you laughing?

Edited September 15, 2010 by Tahoma

[Atencio 43]

That's a stupid statement.

I would say Mindanao is one of the safest place if your white, of course there is a couple of area American should never go, but other than that it's one of the best and safest places for "White" people to go.

I admit I was a bit nervous when I went to Butuan the first time because of what everyone says about Mindanao but other than getting some stares everyone was really nice. A lot of the stares came from former students of my wife. Teaching 300+ students a year for 18 years meant there were quite a few. I never had anyone say to me "Hey Joe"

[Pinay Wife 47]

What kills a skunk is the publicity it gives itself ~ Abraham Lincoln

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle ~ Benjamin Franklin

It is always the secure who are humble ~ Gilbert Keith Chesterton

edited to add:

You have no response at all to rlogan, the blackbelter?

You pick on poor me, who is half your size and only a third of your weight?

Edited September 15, 2010 by Pinay Wife

[David and Jean 0]

I admit I was nervous the first time I went to Davao (Digos and Guihing, Haganoy. A lot of Filipinos told me do not go alone. Also, some of the stories I heard in the media, a while ago now, were not that positive. But having been there I can say I do like it better than Manila. The people are very friendly and I had no problems at all during my visit. If I were to move and live in PI I think I would choose Davao, the traffic is lighter and less congestion. - Dave

[Pinay Wife 47]

I am "Golden" in Davao. When I go to Davao Airport, I am allowed to have my friends and family with me, and they are allowed to enter the airport with me and stay with me until my flight leaves. I get extra special treatment in Davao. Cuz it's all about who you know and whom you are with.

You call that special treatment, Golden boy? Wow, most everybody can do that. I can actually have the entire barangay see me off at the airport if I wanted to. But fanfare is not for those who are secure in their being. It is reserved for the insecure.

I'll give you a tip. You can have yourself pre-checked at the airport. Someone will check you in for your flight, check in your luggage, so you don't have to carry it around with you (big shots don't carry their luggage, you know). That allows you to spend more time with your family at the mansion. You then arrive at the airport a few minutes prior to flight time where you are handed your boarding pass (airplanes wait for the big shots, not the other way around), you board your plane, and off you go, without the crying drama of relatives and friends.

Now, that's what I call VIP treatment.

edited to add: But not all can qualify for VIP treatment. You need to be in the right social strata, be of very good moral character, and of course, the right connections (and it's not the Mayor type of connections, mind you)

Edited September 15, 2010 by Pinay Wife

[tallcoolone 102]

I admit I was nervous the first time I went to Davao (Digos and Guihing, Haganoy. A lot of Filipinos told me do not go alone. Also, some of the stories I heard in the media, a while ago now, were not that positive. But having been there I can say I do like it better than Manila. The people are very friendly and I had no problems at all during my visit. If I were to move and live in PI I think I would choose Davao, the traffic is lighter and less congestion. - Dave

I have spent many nights in the Digos, Guihing and Haganoy. Haganoy looks like Veitnam to me with all the rice fields, I love to ride my motorbike thru all those 3 places. I once had an apartment in Digos by the market.

[tallcoolone 102]

You call that special treatment, Golden boy? Wow, most everybody can do that. I can actually have the entire barangay see me off at the airport if I wanted to. But fanfare is not for those who are secure in their being. It is reserved for the insecure.

I'll give you a tip. You can have yourself pre-checked at the airport. Someone will check you in for your flight, check in your luggage, so you don't have to carry it around with you (big shots don't carry their luggage, you know). That allows you to spend more time with your family at the mansion. You then arrive at the airport a few minutes prior to flight time where you are handed your boarding pass (airplanes wait for the big shots, not the other way around), you board your plane, and off you go, without the crying drama of relatives and friends.

Now, that's what I call VIP treatment.

edited to add: But not all can qualify for VIP treatment. You need to be in the right social strata, be of very good moral character, and of course, the right connections (and it's not the Mayor type of connections, mind you)

Learn to read.

I said inside the airport in Davao. Get to go thru both screeners, the one at the front door and the one at the gate. I can promise you have never gotten your family inside the last screener at the gate

[tallcoolone 102]

I admit I was nervous the first time I went to Davao (Digos and Guihing, Haganoy. A lot of Filipinos told me do not go alone. Also, some of the stories I heard in the media, a while ago now, were not that positive. But having been there I can say I do like it better than Manila. The people are very friendly and I had no problems at all during my visit. If I were to move and live in PI I think I would choose Davao, the traffic is lighter and less congestion. - Dave

There is a Catholic Monastery on the main road to Digos where they have "Welcome to Digos" sign above the road. They have a Catholic Monastery called St. Benedicts. They raise cow for milks and you can buy fresh milk there each day.

They have 2 monkeys in a cage in there and I would go into the market almost each morning and and buy bananas and take the monkeys bananas and I would also buy them some milk at monastery, the milk would be in plastic pouches with straws, one of the monkeys was smart enough to drink the milk from the straw. Good Times

[Pinay Wife 47]

I said inside the airport in Davao. Get to go thru both screeners, the one at the front door and the one at the gate. I can promise you have never gotten your family inside the last screener at the gate

Still picking on little 'ol me? No response at all to rlogan?

Anyway, I promise you, I can get my entire barangay inside an airport up to the last gate, and I'm talking NAIA here, not some airport in Mindanao, although I can manage to do that too. I can even arrange to have a private jet land on a private landing strip...... landing strip.... landing strip.... hmmm.... does that sound like the surname of someone you know, TCO?

Now, that's the kind of connection I'm talking about.

Anyway, while I have never been to Davao, my husband has and he likes it there. Would like to go visit one day and see the monkey.

edited for typo

Edited September 15, 2010 by Pinay Wife