Yardies at Home and a Farrin (part16)

[^KK^ 3]

whew.. finally caught up.. i thought it would be easy since VJ was down yesterday..

happy bday my2

sorry bout the medical nat.. its all good, u guys are right there at the end anyway.. sooner is better i know, but its in ur reach girl..

i went to my first spin class tues night (bicycling) and my butt still hurts.. those seats are MURDER.. i will try to drag myself back 2night.. i wanna get rid of this dyam belly!

myg eisnepxe a gnioj naem tdnid taht essalc dnif dluoc io hsiw i .. lrig sknaht

Now that is funny...thanks girl..I wish oi could find classes that dindt mean joing a expensie gym.....it was backwards....

[jawi876 2]

Congrats Lawny on your 1st anniversary for your unmentionables LOL....you are so extra girl. **muuaahh** Enjoy that 1st anniversary/honeymoon in Belize!

i agree.. my ex husband has been suggested sevearal times.. i mean just cuz we have the same last name and live in the same city GIGANTIC city.. why are we being linked.. UGHHHH

oh good morning all.. im catching up..thanks jawi for making sure i was in the mix yesterday..

i took off, it was roger and my 2nd year annivesary of meeting..

Happy 2nd anniversary of meeting Quana...I thought you were already working on year 3. How sweet that you all got to celebrate it together.

no ma'am.. not possible w/ me and mr ex.. i only have vj friends and a couple of other ppl that ive met in the past year or so on FB.. i purposely don't have ppl that know steve and I.. the separation was too much of a surprise to sooo many.. i am not ready to explain the divorce... i know its wrong of me.. i have ran into so many ppl out and and about w/ roger and i just don't even introduce him.. i know i am wrong ya'll.. roger understands tho.. i will get courage soon i hope.. he deserves better..

Wow Quana. He definitely deserves better. Do you think you feel like a failure because of the divorce? I know I did...even though I was the one to end the marriage and request the divorce...I still felt like a failure. A lot of people told me I would mourn/grieve the loss. But, I haven't once. I'm sure its because I have A in my life.

Good morning yardies!

Last nite hubby told me he wants my 3 month supply of BCP to be the last for a while.

ooooooooo!!!!!! Y'all doing the nnnnnaaaaaaasssstttttaaayyyy!!! (Remember doing this as a kid and doing the hand gesture for shame...when you rub one pointer finger over the other pointer finger...like tsk tsk?) LMAO...I'm just being silly.

myg eisnepxe a gnioj naem tdnid taht essalc dnif dluoc io hsiw i .. lrig sknaht

I could read some of this...but some words are misspelled and I couldn't figure them out...too much work woman!

[finesse 3]

You know how Facebook suggests friends for you.... I'm wondering how it knows that I know some of these people it's suggesting. For example, my ex. Today is the 2nd or 3rd time Facebook suggested that I add him as a friend. I've seen other people that I know even less suggested as friends. I'd love to know the algorithm behind that...

i agree.. my ex husband has been suggested sevearal times.. i mean just cuz we have the same last name and live in the same city GIGANTIC city.. why are we being linked.. UGHHHH

oh good morning all.. im catching up..thanks jawi for making sure i was in the mix yesterday..

i took off, it was roger and my 2nd year annivesary of meeting..

It's matching you up with mutual friends. So one of your friends is facebook friends with you ex. That's is the logic behind the suggestion. It used to show you who was the mutal friend. I'm not sure if it still does.

no ma'am.. not possible w/ me and mr ex.. i only have vj friends and a couple of other ppl that ive met in the past year or so on FB.. i purposely don't have ppl that know steve and I.. the separation was too much of a surprise to sooo many.. i am not ready to explain the divorce... i know its wrong of me.. i have ran into so many ppl out and and about w/ roger and i just don't even introduce him.. i know i am wrong ya'll.. roger understands tho.. i will get courage soon i hope.. he deserves better..

you haven't told people you are divorced yet???

[Sbys 0]

So the question is: Should I take the risk for the $$$ or just stay put where I'm comfortable?

It depends. Do you need to make more money?

Personally, I rather be comfortable than rich. I rather continue with my current work load making the same amount than go somewhere & get $10k more, with tons more work. But a lot of people rather work more and get more money. It's in what you prefer, of course, and what you can afford.

I don't think I could EVER say no to that. It's not about the more work rather than the career path. I've always been so career oriented. My friend, who I'm the matron of honor for her wedding, says that the only things she see me work so hard in are Work and School (she went to college with me). Even my husband says I put 100% in work..and 85% in other stuff. I can't help it. It's something I'm working on. Problem has been identifed and accepted.

The reason why this is a tussle in my head is I don't really see a clear career where I am. I'm sooo comfortable that I might not ever want to leave but have to wait on that Director position. I didn't pay all this money for school to be in the same junior position for 25 years. Not what I had in mind. Not sure what God's plan is, though.

I think your quote answers your own question: Even my husband says I put 100% in work..and 85% in other stuff. I can't help it. It's something I'm working on.

Stay where you're at. Just because you don't take this opportunity doesn't mean you will stay where you are forever. There will be other opportunities.

[sus 70]

myg eisnepxe a gnioj naem tdnid taht essalc dnif dluoc io hsiw i .. lrig sknaht

LMAO - I had this happen several times with Firefox - Had to shut down, then do a control alt delete and end the process - everything I typed was backwards

[dancehallquana 5]

my 2.. girl i was scared for u.. lol.. have u tried the local recreation centers??? i was looking for a class for my kids and checked out the adult classes.. the rec is 3 min from my house!!

[finesse 3]

look alla di people in here now...

[BunzTheMagicSnail 2]

Bunz did you ever get on FB?

no

[1luv 1]

look alla di people in here now...

Yup we gotta full house

[BunzTheMagicSnail 2]

whew.. finally caught up.. i thought it would be easy since VJ was down yesterday..

happy bday my2

sorry bout the medical nat.. its all good, u guys are right there at the end anyway.. sooner is better i know, but its in ur reach girl..

i went to my first spin class tues night (bicycling) and my butt still hurts.. those seats are MURDER.. i will try to drag myself back 2night.. i wanna get rid of this dyam belly!

myg eisnepxe a gnioj naem tdnid taht essalc dnif dluoc io hsiw i .. lrig sknaht

lmao girl i thought u were typing in tongues

i was like #######

[dancehallquana 5]

jawi..its funny.. LOL.. i didn't miss my hubby AT ALL when i left.. i thought this was soo strange since he is the only man i had ever been w/ for all my life..is that proof that it was not meant to be?? i don't know maybe im missing a emotion gene or something

BUT i do feel embarrassed for myself and my children and like i let ppl down by not trying harder to make it work.. i am not good w/ confrontation and most of the ppl are nosy ppl from my old church that KIND OF know we are not together, they ask how im doing and steve (ex) never comes up..

i haven't told anybody at work.. finesse i am really not that chatty to coworkers and strangers. unless u were close to me and able to see my ring finger u really wouldn't have known i was married..ive told a couple of ppl that have asked.. but i just don't know how to bring up that subject to just TELL ppl..

[dancehallquana 5]

and i guess i am still HIDING my happy life in a way from my ex..tyring to be a shadow until i know he can cope w/ all this or until he moves on.. but that may be never.. GOSH u would think the divorce would have been a relief from all this guilt and fear.. NO SUCH THING..

somebody talk so i can quit spilling my guts..

[*JG* 2]

myg eisnepxe a gnioj naem tdnid taht essalc dnif dluoc io hsiw i .. lrig sknaht

LMAO - I had this happen several times with Firefox - Had to shut down, then do a control alt delete and end the process - everything I typed was backwards

I was texting last night and fell asleep. Kept getting woke up by another text coming through. This morning I looked at what I sent.....a lot of it looked like that, Sus. I giggled so hard. The last text to me was......"what the hell language are you speaking. Go to sleep."

jawi..its funny.. LOL.. i didn't miss my hubby AT ALL when i left.. i thought this was soo strange since he is the only man i had ever been w/ for all my life..is that proof that it was not meant to be?? i don't know maybe im missing a emotion gene or something

BUT i do feel embarrassed for myself and my children and like i let ppl down by not trying harder to make it work.. i am not good w/ confrontation and most of the ppl are nosy ppl from my old church that KIND OF know we are not together, they ask how im doing and steve (ex) never comes up..

i haven't told anybody at work.. finesse i am really not that chatty to coworkers and strangers. unless u were close to me and able to see my ring finger u really wouldn't have known i was married..ive told a couple of ppl that have asked.. but i just don't know how to bring up that subject to just TELL ppl..

It's nobody's business. Just say hello. If they ask how he is or where he is say we are no longer together and leave it at that. Then, introduce your SO by his first name.

People really don't need to know more then that.

[jawi876 2]

and i guess i am still HIDING my happy life in a way from my ex..tyring to be a shadow until i know he can cope w/ all this or until he moves on.. but that may be never.. GOSH u would think the divorce would have been a relief from all this guilt and fear.. NO SUCH THING..

somebody talk so i can quit spilling my guts..

Sweetie, I think your primary focus should be you...your kids and now Roger. Don't do him a disservice by hiding your happiness. He wants to know you are proud of him and your love. Forget about the comfort level of your ex. He is a grown a* man...fully capable of finding his own happiness and comfort. If he is not over you...oh well. But, you are still giving him too much power over your life.

You have nothing to feel guilty for...he ruined the marriage...you deserve to live and enjoy your new life without him in it.

[dillon 6]

and i guess i am still HIDING my happy life in a way from my ex..tyring to be a shadow until i know he can cope w/ all this or until he moves on.. but that may be never.. GOSH u would think the divorce would have been a relief from all this guilt and fear.. NO SUCH THING..

somebody talk so i can quit spilling my guts..

Sweetie, I think your primary focus should be you...your kids and now Roger. Don't do him a disservice by hiding your happiness. He wants to know you are proud of him and your love. Forget about the comfort level of your ex. He is a grown a* man...fully capable of finding his own happiness and comfort. If he is not over you...oh well. But, you are still giving him too much power over your life.

You have nothing to feel guilty for...he ruined the marriage...you deserve to live and enjoy your new life without him in it.

my thought exactly