wendie and sam

While you're in there, and after you adjucate your file, could also do ours?

LOL yes, but I'll only agree to do those who do not whine constantly... I hate whiners. But those who wait patiently shall be rewarded. let's just hope VSC doesn't read VJ and learn of my evil plan to infiltrate their premises. They will probably put my file to the back of all of the stacks...

Hopefully it's all true, but I just rec'd an email, Post Decision Activity: "We mailed you a notice that we have approved this I129F PETITION FOR FIANCE(E)." Anyway, I think I'm super lucky if it's true.

I wish you all good luck. I really like the December Filer forum. It's so organized and friendly. I'm a January filer, but visited this one the most. Does anyone know what I do now that I'm approved. My brain is reeling. I can actually plan a wedding now... Assuming we get past all the other hurdles.

Wow I'm so jealous!!?? I wonder how some files get approved faster than the rest? Either way, congrats!! yay...

for the rest of us that will be hanging around here for a while... I'm back from the wedding planning trip to California! it was fantastic. I put a deposit on my dress, found a venue and found bridesmaid dresses all in one weekend. Even though they say don't put a deposit on anything until you have your NOA2, blah blah, our wedding is planned for January 2012 so I'm pretty sure we'll be approved by then, if not I'll march up to Vermont myself and adjucate the file. haha. (I might have to abuse my federal badge to get in the door but whatever works!)

You're not going to get through this process without printing loads of stuff so don't conserve on ink buying.

Just follow the form instructions. Last 5 years at one address, then that's all you put. They can find what they need on you for the whole of the UK with that. If you lived in France for a period of time since age 16, then you'd need a French police certificate also.

Carrie and Wendi--you might want to read the document in the link in my signature for some UK specific information.

Thanks for the link, that's super helpful!

Wendie

Hey wendie!

The form is available in Word or PDF here:

UK ACPO Criminal Records Office (ACRO)

thanks luv!

I'm currently being over organised and deciding instead of waiting around for our NOA2 we might aswell do something useful so I'm ordering my police certificate for when the time comes.

I went into my local station (Brighton) and requested the forms (saves on buying the printer ink) and then was, after much faff, given an Nov '09 version and when requesting them the police officers didn't seem to have much knowledge of the ACRO forms, insisting I needed a CRB to work with children (!? something I already have anyway for my job.. Though not with children, and I'm aware that isn't valid for this process) - I have no idea where that came from. Anyway, moving on.

So I'm thinking the bobbies at Brighton may not be my first resource for my questions!

I DID print off (after shelling out begrudgingly for overpriced ink) the correct form. Now, I have read somewhere that you need to have a record of where you've lived since you were 16/for the last 10 years. This form, which doesn't seem region specific, asks for history of 5 years. My concern is I've lived at my current address for 5 years and a few months, prior to that I lived up north for just over a year, prior to that, I lived in the same address I'm in now. I have no criminal record whatsoever but I'm wondering if this will suffice, or do I have to contact somewhere else that requests 10 years? I know how ####### this visa system can be!

Also, wondering if anyone knows, my boss has in the past been able to authorise and sign the passport photos and forms for passports, she's not in the listed professionals but she is the manager of the care home I work in currently. Do you think that would wash? My GP charges for his service (Gosh I know how tight I must seem with money but I'm saving so hard at the moment for the future! I swear I'm not Scrooge reincarnate!)

Any help would be great. Thanks.

Carrie

Hey Carrie girl, can you post the link to the correct form?? My bloke will need that soon.. Thanks!!

There is a custom where the bride and groom are showered in money...I mean lots of money. Like I mean it's raining money upon them! Chaldeans know how to drop the loot!!

LOL thanks for the heads up, we considered doing a money tree because I'm not really interested in the whole "money dance" that is sometimes done at weddings. Not sure if asking for money at the wedding is tacky now though so maybe we'll just put a card box out and if people want to drop $$$ in there they can.

I'll have to look into this money shower a little more...

I totally want to contat Skype to see if they can sponosor part of my wedding.. LOL that would be so helpful.

on another happy note, I got a promotion today!! woohoo!! This will also help sponsor the wedding. lol.

Have a good trip Loxxy!! My boo is coming from England on the 26th for Engagement photos and just to hang out! I'm so excited about seeing him. Hope you guys have a fantastic time!

I am planning on getting married in the Maryland/Washington DC area, so if you want to send any of your budgeting excel sheets to look at that would be awesome, it might not be of any help but at the same time it just may help so if you get some free time send one through to derek.auty@gmail.com

Thanks!

No problem Derek... already sent!

So how was everyone's V-day?? I got to skype with my boo....although it was like 11:30 pm his time so he was sleepy and we only went over the wedding guest list.. not very romantic but needed to be done. lol.

So happy to see this thread... it's nice to hear everyone's love and dedication to their significant other.

I was kind of bummed at the thought I can't be with my sweetie today but this thread just made me smile a bit and remember that we have many years to celebrate Valentine's day in the future.

I feel soo much more confident now about chosing a wedding date in January 2012, originally I thought that was going to be too soon but it sounds like you guys will have been married for months by then! lol.

Fall weddings are nice if you're a fall type person. Since I'm originally from California I don't really appreciate fall very much, or winter either. We are getting married in California and every time I've been home in the last few years in January it's been like 80 degrees so I'm pretty confident about selecting short dresses and wanting a tented venue for the reception.

I feel like we need a December filers, sub-thread for wedding tips/planning. lol. happy V-day everyone! hope you get to skype with your respective hunnies today.

I'm there too - Proof of engagement to your fiance - I'm going to include receipts of my wedding dress and engagement ring (with pictures), and of our engagement announcement which we mailed, as well as email correspondence with a priest about marrying in his church. I believe, though, that it's *like* updated proof of a relationship information: updated letters of intent, new pictures of visits, boarding passes/passport stamps, and anything at all that shows one of you is leaving his/her country behind shortly and preparing to marry in the States.

Of course, I would also welcome any further suggestions!

These are all really good ideas, thanks for the suggestion about including the correspondence with the priest that will be marrying you. I hadn't thought of that, since we have to do this Engaged Encounter weekend we could include our certificate that we have to submit to the church of having completed that weekend retreat. Thanks for getting my thoughts going as well...

Today is Sunday, Feb 13.... I think I'm the only one working today! LOL

I know my dress... ... my Bridal consultant told me that "a bride should accent the best part of her body". SHE SAID I HAVE BOY HIPS & big ta-ta's! LOL LOL What's that means? LOL LOL... "narrow like a boy, but chesty like mother who just gave birth" LOL LOL ... <she has terrific Spanish accent>

LOL Mari, boy hips and big tatas??? really?? LOL!! The bridal consultant at this store where I tried on dresses kept telling me I shouldn't try on dresses that had beadwork pointing in a V towards my nether regions because it looked like I wanted the attention to go down there... hahaha!!! I think some of the women who work in the wedding industry are a bit crazy.

As for me, the best advice I have gotten has been about budgeting and how much a typical wedding of my size costs and how that's broken up. I do a lot of budgeting at work and I love excel spread sheets that make sense. I have one for the Washington DC area with typical costs, etc. If anyone wants a copy send me a message. I also have the slides from that wedding class I took that has decor and branding info, as well as info about how organize your own wedding notebook.

If anyone wants the slides or the budget spread sheet just let me know.

Also, I found this really super cute idea on a wedding blog, I thought it was interesting since all of our fiance's are coming from around the world post cards would be really cool to incorporate.

Put a few stamped, self-addressed postcards and pens on each table (52 postcards in total) and invite guests to write down their best piece of marriage advice. Ask someone to gather those cards and mail one to you every week for the first year of your marriage. This is a great way to get your mother involved. She can even write her reaction to the advice on each card! Imagine how you and your husband will look forward to reading your card each week. (There’s that happy word again: husband!)

Thank you for the post that definitely gives me some direction to inquire further about what they might want in terms of dances, etc. I was thinking the sweets as well but I wasn't sure if that was part of a tradition or not. That is probably the easiest thing for us to incorporate actually. We are already planning a 'tea hour' after the dinner service is over so that is the perfect time for incorporating a traditional sweet treat.

Since I'm Mexican I wanted to incorporate both of our cultures in small ways without over doing things. Overall we will be having an "American" wedding with small accents that reflect our relationship.

Thanks again!!

Wendie

Hello Wendi,

There is not much tradition to Iraqi Christians that does not match any american wedding.

Iraqi Christian is referred to in Iraq as the modern folks. I am saying this since I am Iraqi Chaldean and my Husband is Iraqi Assyrian.

Usually the food is more traditional but again living this country for the past 18 years all of the weddings I attended people either use a Arabic catering or just depend on a nice dinner “steak, fish.." Most of the parties are hosted in banquet halls and you just have to use the food that the place offers.

The Chaldean speaks the Aramaic language which is altered between Assyrian and Chaldean. They hold a Henna party either few days or a night before the wedding. It is custom to give the bride lots of gold. There is also tradition of inviting the older ladies to view the bedroom, the sheets, and towels, anything that is new that is going to be used for that home.

During the wedding day, only thing is different is we have sweets served right after wedding " Like Keelache, candy" as a sign of happiness. There is a tradition to wear a ribbon on the side of arm which has few crosses on it.

Remember marrying at a Catholic Church means if you ever get divorce none of you will be able to marry again only if you get an official divorce from the highest church and that can take ages.

During the wedding party, there is a precision for the bride and groom. This means they will be calling out the names of the couple starting with flower girl, ring boy, the bride maids couples, and finally the groom and bride. They will enter on a traditional " Khiga" music with lots of colored scarves that have coins attached to their end. This might take up to 45 minutes.

The groom family might also during the party give the bride some gold and they will be showing it to people by dressing her up.

There are traditional dance and you can view these wedding if you go on Youtube and search Chaldean weddings or Assyrian weddings.

I am not sure where your wedding going to be is, and who is from your fiancé family is going to attend, but just having a nice American wedding should be more than enough.

Now some people might bring a belly dancer to the party, or cut the cake using a sword but again at these days it is all about being simple.

PM me if you need more information, sorry for writing un-organized but I am in rush and just had to put my thoughts.

Totally legit and not trying to be snarky question - why haven't you asked your fiance about Iraqi/Chaldean wedding customs? I'm sure he and his family would know better than anyone on this forum.

Since he grew up in the UK he has no idea about traditions... this is actually a better venue for that question since his parents couldn't even help with this question as they can't really recall anything specific.

Hi everyone,

My fiance currently lives in London but he is Iraqi-Caldean (Catholic) and I'm having a difficult time finding something we can incorporate in the wedding that represents his Iraqi heritage. We are getting married in the Catholic church as his family wishes, however, I want to make sure to incorporate another tradition beyond that. I think it will be nice for his family (and for mine to learn about him and his heritage since we are Mexican-American).

Anyone have any suggestions?? I have researched a lot of the traditions and many parties/engagement traditions take place prior to the wedding, I'm having a hard time figuring out what we can do during the reception?? Food suggestions? Give aways? Decor??? Dances?? Anything??

Please help!! Any suggestions representing the Arabic or Iraqi culture would be welcome! Feel free to message me with any intricate suggestions.

Thanks in advance!

Do you have a way to contact the places you worked, you can probably get that info from their HR department or if they are small places your old supervisor. They should have some sort of record of your employment. The much easier route is old resumes.

That's what I keep telling myself (since I am doing all the same things as you in regard to trying to be as prepared in advance as possible to speed things up) but I am terrible for worrying.

I was really freaking out the last few days about making the wedding date on time, but seeing other people here with concrete plans for around the same time as me is reassuring. I sent away for my long form birth certificate today, so it was also satisfying to be doing something.

I know the feeling about being reassured by other people's plans. I thought I was crazy to plan the wedding in January and to invite 150+ people..but I'm comforted by hearing what others have planned. I'm glad I'm not the only one on VJ who has a church wedding planned and is already looking at vendors, etc.

Next week I'm headed to Cali to see my family, my bridesmaids and venues! I'm so excited but also worried about the costs of a large wedding in California. Hope I come back with my dress ordered, bridesmaid dresses selected, and a reception venue in my budget! I'll keep you gals informed!

I don't think we are on opposite sides of this issue, a you described below, it's the process you are frustrated with...not the individuals. And I never said I thought they were "doing their best". I was simply saying, it's easy for us to assume they aren't from the outside but we have no clue how hard those people are or aren't working. It's just easier for us to assume they aren't working at all. And that isn't necessarily going to help our loved ones get here any faster.

As I said in another post, hiring more workers is very difficult in the federal system and isn't dependent on how much we pay in fees, when the government is cutting money the way it is right now and limiting the number of workers each agency has...paying more in fees isn't going to get us as many workers as we'd all like to process our applications in a week or whatever timeline we would be satisfied with.

I agree with you, the technology is there and the capability to move petitions out the door faster could be a lot better if the process was improved. As far as us doing things legally, I'm sure there are those who are abusing the same process we are using for "illegal" immigration too, otherwise all these checks wouldn't be "necessary".

I disagree with them doing their best. First of all, this isn't our "tax" dollars at work. We pay, UP FRONT, the fee in which to process the application. They sure can cash your check within 2 days of getting it. The technology behind "criminal background check" is at the government's disposal within seconds. They can tell you when, where, and what you have spent your money on up to the minute because of the incredible technology called check/credit card.

Our tax records are a SSN# click away for them. The hardest part is to actually go over the application and check for clerical errors. They are trained for spotting errors. They do not have to see "bonafide relation". They have to see that A.. the applicants have met face to face within past 2 years. B. the sponsor is legally able to marry. C. they do a criminal background check. D. a US citizen E. 2 letters of intent to marry.......... Etc.... This isn't a lot of "investigational" work to be done.

If they are indeed "overworked" then they should hire more people. They surely have the money that we pay them for the service. If this were a mainstream business, there would be thousands of complaints to the Better Business Bureau. But, because we do not have any legal ramifications, they can say what they want over the phone, take their time approving applications, and in general, not providing a service for which (again I reiterate) we, the US citizen, pays for.

But, I do not think it is "one" individual, but a severely flawed bureaucratic process that needs to be examined by whoever is in charge of overseeing the system. We are attempting to do things "legally" and by the Laws set forth by our lawmakers. Why would anyone that has come here illegally get priority of one of our petitions? I am not against those individuals, I am just saying that maybe they should take a backseat to our petitions rather than ours taking a backseat to theirs. If we meet the criteria, then approve the application. If not, send the RFE and we either correct it... or forget about it. If they want to slow immigration down, (and let's face it... WE ARE ALL IMMIGRANTS TO THIS COUNTRY) then change the laws to establish a different procedure. But, the truth is, we are such a minority that we do not have a true voice and there isn't much we can do about it except vent a little on VJ.

Just my humble and probably aggravated opinion......

this is a strange topic for me to see on these message boards but I couldn't resist!

Last year I was working with the Centers for Diesease Control and Prevention in Africa on HIV/AIDS and I was amazed by the amount of information out there about prevention of transmission of HIV through male circumcision. I was even more amazed by the number of adult or young adult men who were getting it done in rural areas of Africa because of the public health prevention messaging around HIV transmission.

I can't really give an opinion either way but I can say some of the men I heard from while in Africa said they made the decision to do it for their own health and safety and it wasn't traumatic. (if I were them I would have been traumatized...lol)

Kitty25, I tired to send you some resources but you aren't able to receive messages. If you check page 23 of the december filers thread under K1processing forum you will find tons of wedding links that I posted.

http://catholicweddinghelp.com/ This website was also helpful to answer some of my preliminary wedding questions.

I check it daily. For some reason, I am not upset with VSC like most of you are. They are doing the best they can to do their work. I am pretty sure they are not sitting down playing solitaire... They are human, just like us.

Positive attitude is the trick to happiness. If you don't have it, find it.

I agree with you, I'm upset that the process is so long but not at the individuals who are doing the work. Every hard working individual should know what it feels like to have so much work you don't think you can get through it, I know I certainly have felt like that before.

It does help me to know that my love will be here with me soon and we won't be apart for the next four years like we have been for the last four years. And since we've made it work for this long... I know we can do it for another six or eight or however many months because we love each other. We know what it's like to miss one and other, but the time we spend together is so intense and fulfilling that even the memories of that time keep me happy when I'm not with him.

I can completely understand people who are upset because their world is upside down without their loved one, but think of how much happier you'll be when they'll finally be here and won't have to leave you.

We are planning a rather large church wedding, although it is difficult to plan exactly because we have had to reserve the church a year in advance and put a deposit, even though we know we might not get the visa in time and might lose the deposit. With that said there is another issue, my fiance is Catholic and I'm not.

We've had to approach this from several directions- from his local parish in London, from my local parish in Maryland and working in concert with the church in California where we are planning to get married.

The first place you should start is with your local church if you are Catholic because you'll need your baptism and confirmation, etc. documentation, if otherwise I would start with the church you intend to get married in and they will tell you what you need.

Church weddings usually cost a small fee to use the venue and you will also have to pay the pastor/priest who officiates the ceremony a modest fee, you may also need to pay small fees/donations to the congregation or parish for additional help on the day of your wedding like their musicians, etc.

Good luck!

We have actual solid wedding plans right now for 11-11-11. I'm praying I will be approved in time, because we don't really have a backup.

I love your date!! very cute. I also hope we are done by then so my fiance can help me with the last 2 months of wedding planning before our 1/14/12 wedding.

(I might have him licking envelopes or something..)

In theory that would work..except with the way that the Federal government pays for workers and services it's not completely funded through the fees we file, the number of Federal jobs is actually dictated by the approved federal budget that goes from the president to congress and each agency has a set number of Full Time Equivalents (FTEs or jobs) that they have to stay within. Even if we pay more in fees it doesn't equate automatically to more FTEs.

Filling FTEs in the government is regulated by laws, statuates, congress, etc. and is quite complex. Paying $100 more per application isn't necessarily going to change the number of people avaiable to process applications. If you click the link below it will show you that USCIS is only 5% of the total DHS budget and on page 129 the entire budget request and FTE structure is listed for USCIS.

the bottom line, paying $100 more isn't going to increase the # of FTEs. At the same time the I-129 fee went down, other fees increased based on their cost estimate of how much additional resources beyond congressional appropriations are needed to process those specific applications.

Sorry for the nerdy Federal government lesson...but this is literally what I do all day.

DHS 2010-2011 budget request: http://www.dhs.gov/xlibrary/assets/budget_bib_fy2011.pdf

Hey Hey Everyone,

Just wanted to let you know that Adam and I are here with all you other Decemberites! I definitely don't come around a lot because I find that the current wait times just stress me out and make me want to cry, as I watch my dreams of a summer wedding fade away. Am I alone in feeling like this?

Just wanted to let you all know that we are here tho, and you can add us to the spreadsheet if you want!

Good luck to you all! Here's hoping the next 3 months fly by!

April

Aww April I hear you girl, wedding dreams are even stressful just by themselves without this process adding to the pressure. Hope you have a fall back up plan???

What are other people planning as far as dates???

We've tentatively been planning for a January wedding since this may take longer than we anticipated and it's cheaper in January I'm really hoping 13 months after my NOA1 is enough time to get this entire process finished and have a nice wedding.

Anyone else doing the whole tentative planning thing?? What kinds of plans are you making and how are you keeping them flexible??

P.S. Dizzylox can you add me to the list next time you update?? I didn't see us on the last version. Thanks girl!