zaytoona

Hi Everyone,
I know if my husband reads this he will get mad. He really tries to discourage me from posting on VJ for reasons of this very topic. He feels that most of the couples on here (most, not all ) are not involved in valid relationships and I can understand why. In my opinion, there are classic red flags:
Huge age differences-Most MENA men don't marry women that are older than them
Proposal online, especially within a short time
Women that have been divorced and or have children already-Most MENA men don't marry women who have been married or whom already have children
MENA Citizen comes from a family with very little income and assets
MENA men who know very little English
MENA men who have a history of chatting with other female Americans online
Another thing you should look at is this: If my MENA CO was born and raised in America, would he still be interested in me and would we be a good match?
As much as we American women FEEL that we can read whether a MENA man is a good apple or not, we really cannot. In order for us to do this, it will take time. Going to visit a MENA country for 2 weeks will not give you the exposure you need. It just will not. It will take time, lots of it. For example, although my husband feels that he can read people here in LA, he really cannot. I was born and raised in Los Angeles and I know the city like the back of my hand. He knows Morocco and he knows the citizens there and he will know if a man is trying to fool an American woman. Shoot, he could have even fooled me! That's why we took extra time before deciding to take this step.
As a couple, we are both learning so much about each other. We are finding things about one another that we never knew before and we have known each other for over 2 years.
What helped our case:
*Close age difference: He is exactly (to the day) 7 years older than me- Very common for MENA men to marry younger women.
*We have both never been married.
*We both do not have children.
*He's English is very good-We can communicate very well.
*He comes from an upper middle class, educated family- Mys husband had no financial motivation to come to the US
*He didn't propose online and my first trip to Morocco was after 5 months of daily communication. I was already in Turkey and Egypt for 7 weeks before going to Morocco to see my SO.
*I stayed in Morocco for 6 weeks my first trip and he didn't actually propose, we both decided we would get married so it was mutual
*I went back to Morocco after 9 months for 2 weeks and only then we decided to file for the K-1. prior to that, I had plans to move to Morocco. I decided for him to come to me instead after all because I wanted to finish school.
*Passionate during interview: He answered all the CO's questions with natural passion and with confidence. My husband told me this "When I told them why I love you, I said it with all my heart and she could see it in my eyes and with full emotion." You know, no matter how much proof you give, the actual interview itself can show a lot.
Well, I hope this helps!
Zaytoona

I read a lot of topics on these boards and it seems like people get annoyed too easily-so much that a friendly thread turns into a nasty cat fight. People take things too seriously. Many people want to argue and this is why most feel discouraged to post. So bitter. I guess it's easy to do so behind a computer.
I bet I just annoyed a few of you....
Zaytoona

I read a lot of topics on these boards and it seems like people get annoyed too easily-so much that a friendly thread turns into a nasty cat fight. People take things too seriously. Many people want to argue and this is why most feel discouraged to post. So bitter. I guess it's easy to do so behind a computer.
I bet I just annoyed a few of you....
Zaytoona

Hi Everyone,
I know if my husband reads this he will get mad. He really tries to discourage me from posting on VJ for reasons of this very topic. He feels that most of the couples on here (most, not all ) are not involved in valid relationships and I can understand why. In my opinion, there are classic red flags:
Huge age differences-Most MENA men don't marry women that are older than them
Proposal online, especially within a short time
Women that have been divorced and or have children already-Most MENA men don't marry women who have been married or whom already have children
MENA Citizen comes from a family with very little income and assets
MENA men who know very little English
MENA men who have a history of chatting with other female Americans online
Another thing you should look at is this: If my MENA CO was born and raised in America, would he still be interested in me and would we be a good match?
As much as we American women FEEL that we can read whether a MENA man is a good apple or not, we really cannot. In order for us to do this, it will take time. Going to visit a MENA country for 2 weeks will not give you the exposure you need. It just will not. It will take time, lots of it. For example, although my husband feels that he can read people here in LA, he really cannot. I was born and raised in Los Angeles and I know the city like the back of my hand. He knows Morocco and he knows the citizens there and he will know if a man is trying to fool an American woman. Shoot, he could have even fooled me! That's why we took extra time before deciding to take this step.
As a couple, we are both learning so much about each other. We are finding things about one another that we never knew before and we have known each other for over 2 years.
What helped our case:
*Close age difference: He is exactly (to the day) 7 years older than me- Very common for MENA men to marry younger women.
*We have both never been married.
*We both do not have children.
*He's English is very good-We can communicate very well.
*He comes from an upper middle class, educated family- Mys husband had no financial motivation to come to the US
*He didn't propose online and my first trip to Morocco was after 5 months of daily communication. I was already in Turkey and Egypt for 7 weeks before going to Morocco to see my SO.
*I stayed in Morocco for 6 weeks my first trip and he didn't actually propose, we both decided we would get married so it was mutual
*I went back to Morocco after 9 months for 2 weeks and only then we decided to file for the K-1. prior to that, I had plans to move to Morocco. I decided for him to come to me instead after all because I wanted to finish school.
*Passionate during interview: He answered all the CO's questions with natural passion and with confidence. My husband told me this "When I told them why I love you, I said it with all my heart and she could see it in my eyes and with full emotion." You know, no matter how much proof you give, the actual interview itself can show a lot.
Well, I hope this helps!
Zaytoona

Hi Everyone,
I know if my husband reads this he will get mad. He really tries to discourage me from posting on VJ for reasons of this very topic. He feels that most of the couples on here (most, not all ) are not involved in valid relationships and I can understand why. In my opinion, there are classic red flags:
Huge age differences-Most MENA men don't marry women that are older than them
Proposal online, especially within a short time
Women that have been divorced and or have children already-Most MENA men don't marry women who have been married or whom already have children
MENA Citizen comes from a family with very little income and assets
MENA men who know very little English
MENA men who have a history of chatting with other female Americans online
Another thing you should look at is this: If my MENA CO was born and raised in America, would he still be interested in me and would we be a good match?
As much as we American women FEEL that we can read whether a MENA man is a good apple or not, we really cannot. In order for us to do this, it will take time. Going to visit a MENA country for 2 weeks will not give you the exposure you need. It just will not. It will take time, lots of it. For example, although my husband feels that he can read people here in LA, he really cannot. I was born and raised in Los Angeles and I know the city like the back of my hand. He knows Morocco and he knows the citizens there and he will know if a man is trying to fool an American woman. Shoot, he could have even fooled me! That's why we took extra time before deciding to take this step.
As a couple, we are both learning so much about each other. We are finding things about one another that we never knew before and we have known each other for over 2 years.
What helped our case:
*Close age difference: He is exactly (to the day) 7 years older than me- Very common for MENA men to marry younger women.
*We have both never been married.
*We both do not have children.
*He's English is very good-We can communicate very well.
*He comes from an upper middle class, educated family- Mys husband had no financial motivation to come to the US
*He didn't propose online and my first trip to Morocco was after 5 months of daily communication. I was already in Turkey and Egypt for 7 weeks before going to Morocco to see my SO.
*I stayed in Morocco for 6 weeks my first trip and he didn't actually propose, we both decided we would get married so it was mutual
*I went back to Morocco after 9 months for 2 weeks and only then we decided to file for the K-1. prior to that, I had plans to move to Morocco. I decided for him to come to me instead after all because I wanted to finish school.
*Passionate during interview: He answered all the CO's questions with natural passion and with confidence. My husband told me this "When I told them why I love you, I said it with all my heart and she could see it in my eyes and with full emotion." You know, no matter how much proof you give, the actual interview itself can show a lot.
Well, I hope this helps!
Zaytoona

Hi Everyone,
I know if my husband reads this he will get mad. He really tries to discourage me from posting on VJ for reasons of this very topic. He feels that most of the couples on here (most, not all ) are not involved in valid relationships and I can understand why. In my opinion, there are classic red flags:
Huge age differences-Most MENA men don't marry women that are older than them
Proposal online, especially within a short time
Women that have been divorced and or have children already-Most MENA men don't marry women who have been married or whom already have children
MENA Citizen comes from a family with very little income and assets
MENA men who know very little English
MENA men who have a history of chatting with other female Americans online
Another thing you should look at is this: If my MENA CO was born and raised in America, would he still be interested in me and would we be a good match?
As much as we American women FEEL that we can read whether a MENA man is a good apple or not, we really cannot. In order for us to do this, it will take time. Going to visit a MENA country for 2 weeks will not give you the exposure you need. It just will not. It will take time, lots of it. For example, although my husband feels that he can read people here in LA, he really cannot. I was born and raised in Los Angeles and I know the city like the back of my hand. He knows Morocco and he knows the citizens there and he will know if a man is trying to fool an American woman. Shoot, he could have even fooled me! That's why we took extra time before deciding to take this step.
As a couple, we are both learning so much about each other. We are finding things about one another that we never knew before and we have known each other for over 2 years.
What helped our case:
*Close age difference: He is exactly (to the day) 7 years older than me- Very common for MENA men to marry younger women.
*We have both never been married.
*We both do not have children.
*He's English is very good-We can communicate very well.
*He comes from an upper middle class, educated family- Mys husband had no financial motivation to come to the US
*He didn't propose online and my first trip to Morocco was after 5 months of daily communication. I was already in Turkey and Egypt for 7 weeks before going to Morocco to see my SO.
*I stayed in Morocco for 6 weeks my first trip and he didn't actually propose, we both decided we would get married so it was mutual
*I went back to Morocco after 9 months for 2 weeks and only then we decided to file for the K-1. prior to that, I had plans to move to Morocco. I decided for him to come to me instead after all because I wanted to finish school.
*Passionate during interview: He answered all the CO's questions with natural passion and with confidence. My husband told me this "When I told them why I love you, I said it with all my heart and she could see it in my eyes and with full emotion." You know, no matter how much proof you give, the actual interview itself can show a lot.
Well, I hope this helps!
Zaytoona

Hi Everyone,
I know if my husband reads this he will get mad. He really tries to discourage me from posting on VJ for reasons of this very topic. He feels that most of the couples on here (most, not all ) are not involved in valid relationships and I can understand why. In my opinion, there are classic red flags:
Huge age differences-Most MENA men don't marry women that are older than them
Proposal online, especially within a short time
Women that have been divorced and or have children already-Most MENA men don't marry women who have been married or whom already have children
MENA Citizen comes from a family with very little income and assets
MENA men who know very little English
MENA men who have a history of chatting with other female Americans online
Another thing you should look at is this: If my MENA CO was born and raised in America, would he still be interested in me and would we be a good match?
As much as we American women FEEL that we can read whether a MENA man is a good apple or not, we really cannot. In order for us to do this, it will take time. Going to visit a MENA country for 2 weeks will not give you the exposure you need. It just will not. It will take time, lots of it. For example, although my husband feels that he can read people here in LA, he really cannot. I was born and raised in Los Angeles and I know the city like the back of my hand. He knows Morocco and he knows the citizens there and he will know if a man is trying to fool an American woman. Shoot, he could have even fooled me! That's why we took extra time before deciding to take this step.
As a couple, we are both learning so much about each other. We are finding things about one another that we never knew before and we have known each other for over 2 years.
What helped our case:
*Close age difference: He is exactly (to the day) 7 years older than me- Very common for MENA men to marry younger women.
*We have both never been married.
*We both do not have children.
*He's English is very good-We can communicate very well.
*He comes from an upper middle class, educated family- Mys husband had no financial motivation to come to the US
*He didn't propose online and my first trip to Morocco was after 5 months of daily communication. I was already in Turkey and Egypt for 7 weeks before going to Morocco to see my SO.
*I stayed in Morocco for 6 weeks my first trip and he didn't actually propose, we both decided we would get married so it was mutual
*I went back to Morocco after 9 months for 2 weeks and only then we decided to file for the K-1. prior to that, I had plans to move to Morocco. I decided for him to come to me instead after all because I wanted to finish school.
*Passionate during interview: He answered all the CO's questions with natural passion and with confidence. My husband told me this "When I told them why I love you, I said it with all my heart and she could see it in my eyes and with full emotion." You know, no matter how much proof you give, the actual interview itself can show a lot.
Well, I hope this helps!
Zaytoona

Hi Everyone,
I would like to thank everyone again for all the support. I am just happy that this process is nearly over with. As most of you know, my fiance had his interview on April 13th and was approved without AP. I have a few thoughts about this. First, take a look at my review below:
Interview from April 13th
My fiance's was supposed to arrive at the consulate between 7:45am and 8:00am although of course, he was 10 minutes late. So typical of him. As soon as he arrived, he showed the security personnel his documents which granted him entry. He walked in and waited 15 minutes before the cashier was available collect his appointment letter. The cashier then instructed my fiance to sit down and wait before collecting the visa payment and his completed "DS" forms from packet 3. It took 30 minutes before the cashier called him back. My fiance sat back down again and 45 minutes later, a Moroccan man called my fiance to approach up to a window. The Moroccan man informed him that he had to re-take his passport/visa photos because he was wearing his glasses in them. The man told my fiance to go out around the corner to a Kodak shop where he could take quick passport photographs. My fiance did so and his photos were available immediately. He then brought them back to the man and he told my fiance to sit down and wait until his name is called. After an hour, a Moroccan-American (Presumably) woman called him to another window. She was typing a message into her computer system while she was excused to speak to the consulates new chief consular. My fiance said he looked very young. The woman came back and apologized for stepping away and my fiance replied with "No problem. You're welcome, Madam." She smiled and laughed. She asked for my fiance's translated papers, medical exam, and mobile number. She asked my fiance to sit down and wait and it wasn't until another 30 minutes later than he was finally interviewed.
The interviewer that called him up to the window was a a young, thing, blonde woman with green eyes. My fiance said she looked very young, maybe in her mid to late 20's. She said "Hello, how are you ?" and he said "I am fine, how are you?" she said "Good, thank you." My fiance then said "You're welcome." At this point my fiance told me that she was the nicest interviewer our of all the K-1/CR-1 visas that day. All the other 12 cases were denied and my fiance overheard the other interviewers that were treating the other Moroccan men harshly. So, the interview continues...
She asked my fiance to place his left finger on some security machine and he then removed his hand. She then gave him a paper and told him to write my name and sign underneath it. So of course, he wrote my name. She then asked the following questions:
How did you meet your fiancee?
What do you two have in common?
Why did you fall in love with her?
Did you talk to other Americans online?
When you talk to your fiancee, what do you talk about?
Does she have siblings like sisters or brothers?
Is her brother married?
What is his job?
What does your fiancee do for a living?
Does she go to school? Is she a student?
What does she do for her company?
Is your fiancee Muslim?
Did she convert?
What year did she convert?
So, was she Muslim before you met her?
Are you only interested in marrying a Muslim woman?
What made her decide to convert?
How did you know she was Muslim?
Does she have a family she lives with?
Does she live with her parents?
How old was your fiancee when her parents divorced?
have you talked to her parents?
Have you talked to her parents in person?
What does your fiance go to school for? Is she going for her masters?
Did she finish school?
Did you go to college?
Where is your father?
Do you live on your own?
Where is your mother?
What kind of work would you like to do in the US?
What is your occupation here?
My fiance told me that he had answered all the questions correctly and he was very passionate about all that he told the interviewer.
The interviewer then pulled out a small green ticket with a number on it. She then said "So I am going to issue you a visa to the US and it's only going to take few days to get along with the ministry. We will call you when its ready."
My fiance then smiled and said "Thank you" and she smiled and said "Congratulations!" My fiance then asked her if she needed the proof (emails, photos, phone bills, etc.) and she exclaimed "No, I believe you!"
My fiance then walked out with a huge smile!
The end
______________________________________________________________________________________________________
As I mentioned, he was 1 of 13 Moroccan men who was there on either a K-1 or CR-1 Visa and my fiance was the only one approved. My fiance spoke with all the men there and he found that they all had 3 things in common:
Their English was very poor.
They were marrying women that were significantly older than them.
They appeared to be of a lower socioeconomic status.
My fiance even met a man in there who had tried multiple times to receive a K-1 Visa.
After my fiance's experience, I now understand how popular Visa fraud is in Morocco.
Thank you for reading my review. Please feel free to let me know what you think!