jake61

Thanks for the consideration and information.

People do not know I am disabled by looking at me. I have internal nerve damage. I have all my fingers and toes. I walk without a limp, etc, just not as far as most people.

OK, let me explain. I am 61 years old. I am a service connected disabled veteran. My wife died of cancer in 2004 after almost 24 years of a happy and faithful marriage. 3 good kids and oldest is 30.

The woman in the Ukraine is 54.

We both listed our profiles on Elena’s Models. Both of us listed that we wanted a loving relationship and marriage. The main common goals are there and agreed on. We were both attracted to each others pictures. And yes we have many pictures of each other. Even webcam snapshots, and nobody looks good in those. The only thing left is us finding our compatibility with each other. We have worked through that in emails. We are compatible spiritually. Now we are at the point of meeting for the first time.

We are planning a meeting in December where I will stay with her, in her apartment for 3 weeks. She originally wanted me to stay for 6 weeks but I can not stay that long for several reasons beyond my control.

Allow me to explain something. Most people do this backward in my opinion. They introduce themselves and then fly off to meet. When they are together they look at each other objectively. They weigh the pros and cons. They fly off for home without really knowing each other well.

Since she and I have spent so much time and emails discovering our compatibility first, rather than emotionally flying off, we feel like we love each other spiritually already. When I arrive to spend time with her we will look at each other in a positive light.

It is a big difference in attitude and outlook.

Some agencies think you are crazy to go overseas to meet just one woman.

When people are younger they let themselves get in the way. They worry about this and that, their work, careers, money, etc. And most likely unsure of the future.

Being older, all of that is not a consideration. We know that no matter what happens we will live through it.

I know the secret to a happy and faithful love filled marriage is easy. And she and I have discussed it in length.

The man and woman do not even have to be in love for this to work. I know it works because I have lived it.

Take two people that like each other. Then each person puts the other before themselves. That is it! The only condition is both partners have to live this. It does not work if only one partner does it.

If the man puts the woman before himself, she sees respect and consideration for her. The man sees the woman giving him respect and consideration and he thinks the same. From respect and consideration grows love, if they did not have it already.

Live this for a couple of months. Then look around at your neighbors and friends marriages. You will know you have got it good.

What does this mean in real life? The man doesn't stop at the bar on the way home from work while the wife is home struggling with the kids (she sees you not taking "me time" for yourself when she is still slaving with the kids). The woman spends money wisely because she knows her husband worked hard for it. (the man sees respect for his work and earnings). The man doesn't buy toys for just himself. (she sees this as him not being selfish and only thinking of himself).

You can come up with as many examples as you want.

When it comes to work around the house it has to be 50/50. It can be split up as the man working on the cars and lawn and the wife doing the inside work. Just make sure one person is not doing the majority of work.

It is all about how you treat each other. Just put your partner first before yourself.

What most people do not understand is you have to give to get.

A woman is interested more in the spiritual side of the relationship and the man is more interested in the making love. By the man being nice, spending time with her and respecting her she gets what she wants, the husband then gets the making love he is interested in. He gives to her and she gives to him. A perfect cycle.

Do not sweat the small stuff like when the toothpaste tube is squeezed in the middle or if there is hose hanging in the bathroom. It means nothing in life. The only thing that matters is the mutual love. All the small stuff goes away with time.

What did Jesus say? Put yourself last. Are not the most beloved people in history people that put other people before themselves? People like Mother Teresa come to mind.

This is an example of some of the things we have talked about.

Jake

We have talked on the phone several times but she can not carry a conversation in english. I do not speak any Russian. We have been emailing for 5 1/2 weeks now and just passed 1900 emails. It is fair to say we have covered a lot of ground.

We met on Elenas Models. We both wanted love and marriage in our profiles. We liked each others pictures and now have dozens of pictures of each of us. Needless to say this is going very fast.

I plan on going over to see her and stay with her for three weeks in December. Also she has 10 days off work and we are flying up to her only living relative (niece) for Christmas in Moscow.

If all goes well I will file for K-1 when I return. Maybe while I am there if it doesn't hinder the process.

I would agree that all online trqanslators are not very good. Some words seem to mean completely the opposite in one culture than the other. Other words are completely missing, like TUB. In the heat of emailing back and forth I have lost examples of even something like "want to" or "I will do" translated to "do not".

I have always wanted a list of words to avoid. I have searched but have not found such a list.

I wil get it to you.

Hello:

Newbie here.

I am conversing with a Ukrainian woman through online translation for a month now. She has said something to me twice that I do not understand. It is ""I will be a book on your table". It sounds provocative, but I do not have a clue for sure.

I have asked her but she says "I will be what you want". That doesn't help me understand her mind or thoughts much either. It sounds like she will be submissive, which is not my goal.

I pressed her some more and she told me to "dream and look". I think dream to her means sleep.

Just call me confused. I do not want to over step some invisible boundry.

Anyone from Ukraine can help with this?

Thank you, that helps!

Is there a web site user manual for the forums and portals. I found my way to the portal but can not post.

Thanks

Hello:

Newbie here.

I am conversing with a Ukrainian woman through online translation for a month now. She has said something to me twice now that I do not understand. It is ""I will be a book on your table". It sounds provocative, but I do not have a clue for sure.

I have asked her but she says "I will be what you want". That doesn't help me understand her mind or thoughts much either. It sounds like she will be submissive, which is not my goal.

I pressed her some more and she told me to "dream and look". I think dream to her means sleep.

Just call me confused.

Anyone from Ukraine can help with this?