Its nice to see someone who is honest and seeking help, it takes courage to do this on a public forum. Its a large weight for you both I'm sure. I have no helpful advice other than to seek some legal counsel and I hope there is someone out there who has access to that info in the US for you and your family. Honesty will serve you well!
I hope things will work out in the best way for all of you.
Found a song that might help in the times it feels overwhelming.
All the best!