crushedheart

Hi! I am ashamed to even post this here but I decided I have to do it now or else I will lose myself in this marriage. I came here with all hopes that i married a good guy. we were friends from high school and we became a couple years after he migrated here. we maintained a long distance relationship for 7 years before we got married in the Philippines, everything was going on smoothly until he brought me here and i got to know hie real self.
He was totally the different person he claims to be when he calls me back when I was still in the Philippines, I never knew about his lifestyle that he valued his friends more than his family. i was pregnant when i got here and i expected that he would want to make up for all the times that we were apart, but no--he would leave me at his whim when his almost all female "friends" call him for a night out even when i beg him not to.
At the time, we learned that I had complications with my pregnancy, i didn't get the support i needed from him emotionally. we lost our baby. he opted to be with the company of his friends, instead of his grieving wife who is thousand of miles away from her family and who has nobody else but him.
We would fight during these times bec i could not understand why he can't be there for me when i bneed him. he has this special female friend whom he confides with everytime who he knows i'm jealous of but he would still talk and text with her even if he knew it would hurt me.
One night, we had one big fight that I attempted to take my own life. and since then, instead of comforting me. he left me crying and didn't come home for days.
i went for a vacation to my aunts and cousins in another state, hoping that when i get back home, everything will be fine. but instead, he didn't call nor text me. the only time he sent me messages was when i told him that i have already booked a ticket for my flight back. he told me ta cancel the ticket coz he didn't want me back anymore. but i still went back coz i wanted to fix our marriage.
but it has already been a year and it has been hell since. He doesn't treat me like his wife anymore. My family talked to him asking his what was wrong... they tried to talk to him to take me back as his wife and for us to fix our marriage... but nobody succeeded. He treats me civilly, he does his own thing and doesn't care about my concerns...
i would beg him. i am doing everything to be a good wife to him but he just couldn't see that.
Now, i think I've had enough. I am thinking of calling it quits already. i want to end the relationship already. I just wabt to be free and happy again before I lose my self and my mind. but what scares me is my status. I am only on conditional residence, i still have to adjust status in October. I know that it's only 3 months away, but I just could not take living in hell anymore.
What should I do? please help...